A/N: Hello all! This scene takes place directly after the scene in which Pete shows Sam their new house for the first time…here's a snippet in case it's been a while since you've seen the episode
SAM: Can I open them now?
PETE: Almost. OK. Now. What do you think?
SAM: Uh ... well ... uh ...
PETE: Speechless, huh!
SAM: Yeah!
PETE: Yeah! Isn't it great! Remember our first night together? You described the house you always wanted?
SAM: I can't believe this.
PETE: The kitchen isn't yellow, but we can paint. C'mon -- I'll show you. And you're not gonna believe the back yard! The dog's gonna love it!
CARTER: Dog?
Again, thanks for all your great reviews. Well, here it is! Enjoy!
Threads, Integrated - Chapter 3
"The kitchen isn't yellow, but we can paint," said Pete, a childlike grin plastered on his face. "C'mon -- I'll show you. And you're not gonna believe the back yard! The dog's gonna love it!"
"Dog?" Sam asked in spite of herself. Since when were they getting a dog?
"Well, you know," said Pete shrugging, "Till we go the whole mile."
Sam raised an eyebrow and shook her head. What on earth was he talking about?
"You know," Pete repeated, waving his arms about as though it would help her understand, "Kids!"
"Oh," Sam said with a small giggle that was definitely not her own. Kids? Why was he already thinking about kids? A small voice in the back of her mind told her that it was probably because they were getting married. People who were about to get married were supposed to be thinking about having kids. Sam blushed in spite of her self. For some reason, she felt thoroughly embarrassed.
She took a moment to study Pete's face. What would their kids look like? She highly doubted they would look anything like Jess. She rolled her eyes. What a stupid dream. She supposed she must have been extremely tired to have dreamt such a farfetched idea. To think it possible that she was still romantically attached to Jack O'Neill was ridiculous, even laughable. A large part of her however, didn't feel like laughing. She tore herself from her absurd thoughts of Jack O'Neill and returned her attention to Pete's face and what their children would look like. She tried to imagine children and growing old together when Jack's face appeared in her mind's eye. This was getting alarming. She gave herself a mental kick up the six and tried as hard as she could to keep her thoughts on Pete…her fiancée…the father of her future children.
She sighed and looked at the ground. She couldn't imagine having a child who didn't look like Jess – who didn't sound like Jack – who didn't come from Jack. She realised why she was so embarrassed. She was supposed to be already imagining her children with Pete. She should have been thinking of names, or of what their faces would look like, not what her and Jack's children would look like. But she just couldn't help it. She wanted to know what life could have been like.
She swore silently at herself. She couldn't believe what she was doing. She was standing with her fiancée at the house he had bought for her, and still all she could think about was another man that she couldn't have.
She looked back up at Pete, who seemed a little worried that she hadn't spoken for a few minutes. What was she going to do? In the last five minutes she had thought of Jack, thought of Jack replacing Pete, and thought, in considerable detail, what life could have been like if Pete had never been in the picture. The three things she had only recently denied ever doing.
She took another look at the amazing house. How on earth could she live here? It just didn't seem real. Everything, down to the picket fence just looked far too much like a fairy tale. She couldn't help thinking that her future would be just that. A fairy tale. Nothing was real anymore. Every smile, every kiss just seemed like another line being written in a children's book. She reacted to it all, but didn't really feel any of it. Her feelings just didn't seem like feelings at all compared to those that she had for…other people. Happiness was just an expression, love was just a farce. She couldn't count on any of it anymore.
Except for that face. The face of her child. And the face of its father. Funny, the one thing that made her feel the most grounded and emotional was the one thing that wasn't actually real at all. The thought of having a daughter with that man – the thought of being with him – any thought of him really, took her away from the fairytale, back into comfort and reality. And that wasn't something she could just ignore.
"Sam…Sam honey?" Pete asked, waving a hand in front of her face.
"Sorry Pete," she said, shaking her head a little and smiling at him.
"Is everything ok?" he asked.
"Of course," Sam said, her smile not stretching as far as her eyes.
"Are you sure?" asked Pete, "Because you look a little distracted." Sam shrugged, laughing as though he was out of his mind. "Is there something you need to do?" he asked.
Sam froze, the smile falling from her face. Was there something she needed to do? She could no longer deny what Jess had been telling her. She needed to know the truth. She had to find out, before she let herself be trapped in fairytale land.
"Sam?" Pete asked again. "I know you're busy honey, I don't mind. If there's something you need to do…"
"Thanks Pete," said Sam, cutting him off before he could continue. "Sorry," she said, flustered, trying to figure out whether or not to go. "Yeah, there is something I need to do," she said finally. "I won't be long," she said, backing away towards the car.
This was it. The final confrontation. In a few short moments she would know for sure. With a polite smile and a wave, Sam got into the car and drove off to meet her destiny, once and for all.
