Wild-filly: Another chapter uploaded in what feels like a matter of minutes to me…It's great to be finally moving along with this fanfic – some plot is actually going to appear! Prepares yourselves for this cataclysmic event! Much thanking-ness to all reviewers, xl-twisted-lx, Sky Spade, shadow-kazul, Bluelady198, Tora Macaw, Anime Lance, JapanAnimeGirl, Katzuki, Andrea, kimpster, hiddenwindmill and Grummur! It was wonderful to receive so many comments so quickly!

Disclaimer: Still don't own… I have an extensive variety of Kakashi-related merchandise, both the Naruto Playstation games (entirely in Japanese), a stack of manga and episodes, but no; I still haven't forked out enough for the rights to the series (muttering under breath)

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Okumen Gokurakuchou: Chapter 19

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Despite his hasty burst of energy in order to distance himself from Gai, Kakashi could feel the suffocating, numbing fatigue that accompanied only the gravest of injuries he had ever experienced. Akiraka's jutsu had sealed up his wounds enough to prevent them from bleeding too much both internally and externally, but the extensive tissue damage and torn muscles were also demanding a lot of his body's energy to replenish. To be honest, he was amazed he was even conscious at this point. Sitting up, swaying slightly on the sand, he watched the other members of his team, hunched over the pile of scrolls that still needed to be translated. He'd forgotten all about those wretched things in the light of the last few events.

"How did you manage to keep a hold of them in prison?" Masurao was leaning ponderously over Akiraka's scroll, pencilling a rough translation onto a sodden piece of parchment he had unearthed as Gai tried and failed to read the other one.

Flashing one of his trademark star-twinkling grins, Gai gave Masurao a thumbs-up sign. "When I am given something to protect, I will protect it with my life! They could not take my scroll far from me!"

Akiraka coughed, her own health was probably worse than Kakashi's. "Actually, they took all of our belongings off of us the instant we arrived in prison. We knew where they were being kept though, so we were able to grab our stuff before bailing".

Masurao raised one eyebrow at Gai and disdained to comment as the flamboyant ninja's grin slipped ever-so-slightly. "See? Even when in the direst of circumstances I can still keep track of my duties!" The voice seemed a little desperate now, so Kakashi decided to make things worse for the floundering Shinobi.

"So how long were you kept in there? I don't expect to hear that you went in without a struggle". He waited expectantly, but Gai's eyes suddenly slid off to one side, watching Akiraka intently with a peculiar expression. Akiraka didn't return the stare, her gaze fixed somewhere in the distance, lips pursed tightly together. Kakashi blinked and finally took in the extent of her condition for the first time in almost a month.

She was little more than a skeleton.

Both arms were indeed broken, as he had pointed out earlier that morning upon waking up. Grubby makeshift bandages bound them tightly and formed slings, restricting her range of movement. Her hands too, were wrapped in filthy cloth, dark brown stains at the fingertips. There was little of her face that wasn't bruised, making her eyes seem larger than usual; a strained, almost hunted look in them. Her bones seemed to jut from beneath her pallid skin, unnaturally so, as though her body was breaking down despite itself. He felt his throat clench. There was only one way she could have succumbed so swiftly to such a pathetic condition. They had tortured her.

Gai cleared his throat, intent on getting away from this topic. "We were only in there for a couple of days, but it felt like an eternity. There's nothing worthwhile to remember". He turned his face away, refusing to give any more information or look Akiraka in the face. Gai, Kakashi noted, seemed to be entirely healthy in comparison to Akiraka. He began to form his own conclusions about what had happened in the confines of that prison. It wasn't an uncommon occurrence for one prisoner to be singled out for torture while the other was berated with questions, using guilt to force out answers.

Masurao coughed, trying to break the awkward, turbulent silence that had developed. "Hey, Gai would you pass me your scroll? I've finished with this one".

With a shadow of his old, cringe-worthy grin, Gai thankfully relinquished his scroll and picked up Masurao's finished translation, sitting it next to the other three translated papers. "Is Kurotaka-san still asleep?" He turned to stare at the motionless Kunoichi, eyes watery with concern. "She was so brave to waste her beautiful, young blood on such an ungrateful wretch like you Kakashi!"

Kakashi snorted, rolling his eyes in distaste. "Why don't you tell her that when she wakes up? I'm sure she'll be delighted to hear that you think her sacrifice was a meaningless one". He narrowed his eyes arrogantly at the flaming-eyed Gai, a sly idea coming to him – Gai had yet to encounter the wrath of Kurotaka vexed. This could potentially work to his advantage…

A faint mumbling came from the slumbering pile that was Kurotaka, stirring slightly under the pile of scavenged blankets and clothing. Gai hastily moved over to her side, clasping one of her hands in his. "Kurotaka-san! You're going to be alright! I'll never move from your side!" The stirring froze and Kakashi nearly choked trying not to laugh as he pictured the facial expression underneath the blankets at Gai's heartfelt proclamation.

Masurao shuddered in the middle of his translation, letting one eye roll to one side so he could be a witness the bloodshed that could well arise. Akiraka seemed not to notice, arms tightly folded and stare somewhere beyond them all. Only she and Gai seemed not to anticipate the potential explosion. There was a rustling, scuffling and Kurotaka's tousled head appeared from the depths of the cocoon of clothing. She blinked several times, stared pointedly at Gai and stared pointedly at her hand. Then she glared.

"Let go". It wasn't a question, a request or even a stern order. It was a command given with all of the arrogance and wounded dignity of an offended monarch.

Most unfortunately for Kuro's ego though, Gai was not only modesty-challenged, but also tone-deaf unless it came to Kakashi springing insults on him. The bowl-cut-haired ninja released her hand reluctantly, tears flooding his eyes as he knelt beside her. "Oh Kurotaka-san! So very noble in her sacrifice, do you still ache from the effort you spent on that worthless mongrel's life?"

She blinked for a very different reason this time, utter confusion writ clearly over her face. "I thought the blood was for Kakashi?"

Kakashi felt an immense surge of pleasure at that statement, heightened only by the fact that Gai shook his head in sorrowful disgust. "That is to whom I was referring, Kurotaka-san. Are you alright?" He no longer seemed so star-struck by her blood donation, an expression of something almost like disappointment on his face.

She nodded absent-mindedly, still confused. "Where is he?"

Gai pointed wordlessly behind himself and Kakashi felt his chest clench as she stared at him, her eyes seeming to flood with emotion as they searched for and found his own pupils. She leapt up from the blankets, staggering as they remained wrapped around her legs and almost falling back down to the sand. Kicking herself free, she shuffled swiftly over to him. Then she halted, standing over him and Kakashi suddenly felt his stomach sink. That wasn't joy in her eyes; that was a glare. An especially malevolent glare at that. He pondered vaguely that she was probably going to berate him for being so completely irresponsible and forcing her to undergo one of the most unpleasant jutsu Kakashi had ever heard of. Or maybe she'd finally found out that he'd borrowed her shampoo back at the waterfall village.

The navy blue eyes pierced him, anger and contempt livid in her face. Gai no longer looked so upset now that Kakashi was cringing before the incurred wrath of what was now revealed to be an exceptionally temperamental woman. Kakashi sighed, breaking his eyes away from the line of fire. It most probably wasn't about the shampoo.

"Kuro… I'm sorry. I truly am. I didn't mean-" She suddenly enfolded around him, cutting off his words out of complete shock. His eyes widened, shifting to stare at her as he was clasped tightly into a firm embrace. Her arms were locked around his neck, face buried into his collarbone and tears freely spilling from her eyes, trickling down his chest. She was so small, so warm and strangely comforting in her own way. He didn't know what to do, arms rigid above her shoulders as she nestled in closer. Giving up on thinking, he hugged her back, pulling her even nearer to him and closing his eyes. It was an amazing feeling, this serenity. A sigh burst forth from her, quiet sobs subsiding enough for her to speak.

"Don't you ever even THINK about making me worry like that again. Never again. Never". The adamence in her voice overrode the shakiness spawned by her tears of relief, arms tightening their grasp possessively. It occurred to Kakashi that she now considered him more or less her property. Her hair tickled his bare chest, still in need of a replacement shirt and the uncomfortable sensation of it suddenly made him very aware of the fact that Masurao, Akiraka and Gai had all broken out of their collective stupors to stare at them, expressions ranging from amusement to confusion to outright distaste. He flushed slightly, but still didn't release his hold of her, letting one hand move upwards to cradle her head protectively, fingers burrowing deeply into her long hair now gritty with sand.

"I think I've finished with the scrolls now". Masurao spoke as quietly and tactfully as possible, face twitching as he tried not to laugh. Kurotaka slackened her grip and pulled away from Kakashi only to sit next to him, fingers combing through the white tips of her scruffy hair self-consciously. There was a slight pink tinge to her cheeks. Gai was looking the other way, face unreadable from that angle, but Kakashi was certain that he wasn't exactly delighted to find out that he had come second in Kurotaka's list of people to thank.

"Right – it's all fairly straightforward". He gently laid each of the papers on the sand, carefully arranging them into a star-shaped pattern, the curving texts all alined neatly together. Gai leant curiously over Masurao's shoulder, not appearing to notice the other ninja's intense discomfort at this action. "Would you mind getting the water skin for me, Gai?"

"At once!" The old enthusiasm was back and thankfully for Masurao, so was his air space.

"Ok, would you mind passing me one of your kunai, Kuro? And I'll need a piece of Kakashi's hair while I'm at it, so you might as well saw off a chunk once you get that knife out". He grinned apologetically at Kakashi. "So sorry about that Kakashi-kun, but since your hair's so scruffy as it is, no one should notice".

"I don't think I can accept the first apology without asking for a second". Kakashi glared but tilted his head down obligingly for Kuro to gingerly slice off a small lock. She tossed them over to Masurao, staring curiously. "Why do you need those things?"

Masurao grinned, accepting the water skin from Gai and digging a little hole right in the middle of the star with his spare hand, pushing the papers aside to burrow into the sand. He squeezed the container, spraying a stream of water into the hole and seizing the handful of silver hair, scattering it haphazardly over the pieces of parchment. He then took up the kunai and carefully made an incision in his palm, drawing the blade slowly across his hand and then clenching it into a fist, letting the blood well up and drip onto each page. Angling the kunai to catch the rays of the sun, he then reflected the sunlight onto the little pool of vanishing water, stray silver hairs floating on the rapidly more shallow puddle. Kakashi leant in to stare critically at the process. It had to be one of the most complex releasing procedures he had ever seen.

Now if only something would happen.

Masurao's triumphant grin was becoming more and more fixed. Gai was frozen in a stance of celebration, peace sign and huge smile becoming more and more out of place as the minutes trailed by. Kurotaka, Kakashi and Akiraka just sat and stared, Kakashi not knowing which was more pathetic; Masurao's attempt at initiating the scrolls or Gai's halted victory dance. It was a tough competition.

A couple more seconds passed and Masurao began to swear, one hand tugging at his hair in fury.

"What the hell is wrong with this thing? It plainly stated 'three bright substances, always seen but invisible alone'. Light, water… Kakashi, did your #) hair screw up my perfect scroll release!"

Before Masurao could turn around and proceed to attempt to murder Kakashi, a huge gust of wind erupted from the heart of the star. A twisting, writhing whirlwind that blasted sand into their eyes, forcing them all to cover their faces and in Gai's case, stop grinning like a maniac. At last the dust storm died down and Kakashi lowered his arm from where it had been hastily thrown up to protect himself. Akiraka hadn't had the same luck and was now facing the opposite direction in order to prevent suffocation by the sudden sandstorm. He stared in surprise at the sight that awaited him.

That red-haired nazi that had given him his first concussion for the exam was standing in front of them.

She seemed as delighted to see them as they her, judging by the ugly scowl on her face and haughty stance. "What the hell took you assholes so long to figure out the code?"

Nobody answered. They all knew better than to offer fuel to her fire.

She snorted in disgust. "Pathetic. Utterly pathetic the lot of you. You're lucky that the whole exam's been called off, otherwise you'd be failed in front of the entire class".

Gai face-faulted, the flames in his eyes extinguished in one swift blow. "The whole exam has been… called off?"

She rolled her eyes contemptuously, "How often would you like me to say it? It's over; since the nations all declared war again all the other countries' Chuunin have been pulled out of the examination. That means you five idiots as well". There was an indecent amount of satisfaction in the statement. Kakashi now felt as though he had no insides left. All this pain, all this suffering… all for nothing.

"You should count yourselves lucky that the Third Hokage-sama is so generous as to grant you all an honorary pass in the light of the situation". She grinned toothily at them, reminding Kakashi far too much of a vampire despite her words.

"So it's all over?" Masurao's voice was brimming with disbelief and shocked pride. "We're all Jounin now?"

The bloody-haired Special Jounin shook her head impatiently. "You'd have been better off remaining as Chuunin since we're at war now. As soon as you get back to Konoha, you're getting sent off to the front lines". The sharklike smirk returned. "It's far from over, little ninja". She ran a casual eye over their hunched forms, taking in the extent of the collective injuries with an experienced eye. "Although you may have to spend a little time in hospital first. If you survive the trip back home, that is".

With that heartening note, she gathered up the blood-splattered papers and clasped her hands into a seal, conjuring up another breeze and vanishing from view as the sand whipped up to hide her.

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"I'm sick of walking".

"Would you rather be running?"

"In all honesty, yes, but I wouldn't like to have my chest split open again".

"In that case, shut up and stop complaining".

"Gai could always carry you if you want to run the way back".

"I'll shut up". Kakashi shuddered. He was eternally gratefully that he didn't have any memory of that particular event. Gai looked suitably cheerful at having succeeded in wounding rival-Kakashi's pride, cheerful to the point that Kakashi longed to find a convenient blunt object to throw at him. However, since Masurao wouldn't appreciate being thrown at people, he would have to pass on the opportunity and store it for revenge at a later date.

Kurotaka was walking silently alongside him, but he still felt her presence as clearly as if she were engaged in an animated conversation. She was worried about Akiraka, who even now hadn't said anything and was continuing to stumble on ahead of them all. Gai and Masurao had offered to carry her on several occasions, but a streak of arrogance that rivalled even Kakashi's had made her decline every time. At this rate it would take them all week to get back to Konoha, and neither Kakashi nor Akiraka would be in a very good shape by the time they arrived.

"Wish we could get a lift somehow".

Kurotaka froze in her tracks, eyes wide with realisation. "I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner!"

"Think of what sooner?" Masurao halted and turned to look at her, "You didn't leave something behind did you? There's no chance of us going back for it…"

She waved her hand impatiently. "No, not that - I just remembered that Kakashi taught me a new jutsu a while ago".

Masurao coughed, giving Kakashi a highly suspicious look that suggested that he didn't like the sound of this extra "training" and what it may have involved. Kakashi glared back, but was too relieved to feel properly annoyed. "I taught her how to summon birds; maybe she can get us all a ride back to Konoha". The obviousness of this answer smacked him in the face like a vengeful punching bag on the reverse swing. How much pain and trouble could they have solved if they'd only remembered this sooner?

Gai stared at Kurotaka in surprise and then blinked guiltily. "What kind of birds do you summon?"

She gave him an appraising look. "I believe you attacked the last bird I summoned", she responded coolly. "He was an ultimate-summon, or so I think; a massive white falcon by the name of Furi-Damu. I won't try to call him though, in case he remembers the insult and decides to extract revenge". Gai shuffled his feet uncomfortably "I apologise Kurotaka-san, but in the flames of my youthful exuberance I leapt in too hastily and left a terrible memory for your friend! Can you ever forgive me?"

Kakashi was tempted to suggest to Kurotaka that she let Furi-Damu chew his way through that apology, but refrained on the grounds that it seemed too petty. For now at least.

"Speaking of birds, where has that seagull of yours gotten to? Not that I'm complaining about his absence of course". Masurao yawned, shuffling his lightened backpack from shoulder to shoulder. "I can't wait to get back home, even if it's only for a couple of minutes before being sent off on some suicidal exploit".

Kurotaka shook her head, unconcerned. "Guntou isn't a pet, so he comes and goes as he pleases. I don't think he likes the desert much any way. Either way, I have a couple of his feathers on a necklace I carry about, so the summon isn't going to be awkward". Kakashi breathed a mental sigh of relief. He had just been wondering about that.

As Kuro knelt down to fish through the depths of her bag, Gai shot Kakashi a challenging stare. "And since when were you qualified to teach such potentially dangerous jutsu? You overstep your boundaries, Kakashi. I'd be right to inform the Hokage of your foolhardiness!"

Kakashi rolled his eyes. "I'm a Jounin now, remember? I can train just about anyone anything. Except perhaps you when it comes to properly washing hair". Ah, how he had missed these jibes. The look of smouldering rage on Gai's face as he stood, one fist clenched and eyes taut with fury brought back such wonderful memories of Kakashi proving his superiority in every way possible… on shaky grounds admittedly, but still proven after a fashion.

"Got it!" Kurotaka rose, clutching a dangling beaded necklace with a string of pale feathers pierced through the wire. She gently placed them on the ground, biting her thumb as she did so and placing her slightly bleeding hand on top of the necklace, smearing the feathers with blood in the process. Curious despite himself, Gai craned over her shoulder for a closer look but was forced to retreat hastily when a great surge of Chakra forced its way to the surface, sparking from her skin and flooding down to pool at her hand, blue flames flickering in their mesmerizing dance.

Kakashi watched with approval. Her control was better than the last time – even with lowered Chakra supplies, she was still able to push sufficient energy into the summon thanks to her progress. It was nice to have such a talented pupil, even if she had only been his pupil for the grand total of one day and courtesy of some poorly thought-out blackmail on his behalf.

Seconds flashed past as a dome of white light slowly bubbled up from the ground, absorbing the writhing, twisting Chakra and swelling as it did so, encompassing more and more of the sandy track. Kurotaka stood still, allowing the white dome to enfold her as it blossomed to take up even more of the available space. The whiteness pained Kakashi's eyes, breaking his gaze away as Kuro vanished from view. This was different from before, but he was certain that nothing bad had come of it.

The light faded and dust settled, leaving only a somewhat ruffled Kurotaka and two large, albino hawks standing beside her, each of the birds as tall as a carthorse. Gai jumped backwards out of reflex; probably remembering his last encounter with a large white bird. Masurao watched on with amusement while Akiraka continued to stare into space, barely aware of the fact that anything had happened.

With the expression of one who has just been shaken from a deep sleep, Kurotaka blinked muzzily and draped one arm over the neck of the nearest bird, murmuring softly. The hawk's brilliant red eyes hardened and its head lowered as though to catch her words. Masurao made as though to approach them, but Kakashi held out a hand to still him; he had incurred the wrath of these creatures before and once was more than enough for his liking. He stood and watched apprehensively, not daring to move until Kurotaka gave some sign that it was safe.

The hawks then rose their heads, brilliant crimson-pink eyes scanning the waiting Shinobi. Kurotaka's murmuring had become louder, face insistent, pleading. She seemed to be winning the argument though, as the bird whose back was sporting her arm flared his wings, legs crouching slightly with a look of vague defeat on his face. With a grin, she leapt nimbly onto the feathery back, slipping as she sought to find purchase on the silky feathers before letting her Chakra do the gripping for her. She waved to the others, beckoning them closer.

Kakashi approached first, drawing level with her knee and staring up at where she sat tall and easily astride the fidgeting falcon. "Is it safe for the rest of us to mount up, or will we end up brutally mauled?"

She grinned, nodding fiercely, face rapt with pride. "They're such proud, noble creatures. This is a wonderful gesture for them to make; letting us ride on their backs, that is. Can you get on or do you need a hand?" Kakashi surveyed the height pensively, painfully considering his stiffness and the possibility of reopening his wound should he make any sudden movements. "I believe that I may need some help".

Oh if only he'd waited before saying those words.

"Never fear, Kakashi! I shall assist you in your time of ungraceful weakness!" Gai's voice boomed out from behind him and before Kakashi's strained reflexes could respond, he felt himself being seized under the arms and hoisted aloft. Kurotaka's arms guided him onto the bird's back, Gai boosting him up from the ground as he scrabbled to stick himself to the feathers with Chakra. Ah the shame of it all. Bad enough to be too stiff to clamber onto the wretched creature, let alone foolish enough to let Gai know of that weakness and add something else to his growing blackmail collection.

A few minutes later and the other three were also mounted on their identical albino falcon, Akiraka pinned in between Masurao and Gai to prevent her from slipping off. Since healing Kakashi, her Chakra had still to return to its normal levels. She still looked dazed, staring into the horizon. They needed to get her back to Konoha; back to a hospital where she so desperately needed to be now.

Kurotaka leant forward, murmuring to the great bird beneath her. Kakashi felt the powerful muscles beneath him bunch, wings tucking and then exploding, thrusting them suddenly upwards in a remarkable demonstration of strength. Gravity sucked at him, making him feel as though he were being plastered against the soft feathers. Wings beat steadily, strongly alongside him, wind screaming past as they rapidly gained height. The pressure finally lessened, the bird now cruising at a convenient height, wings beating less frequently.

Kakashi glanced once back down at the ground and swiftly added that move to one of his most foolish. He let his attentions remain fixed purely ahead of him. Just don't let that Chakra hold fail now… Ok, that wasn't a reassuring thought. Oh what a lousy idea this had been.

Kurotaka turned back to face him, face glowing with pleasure. For a moment he wanted to hate her for enjoying what he was so acutely not, but the look of joy she was wearing suited her too well. He carefully moved his hands forward, wrapping his arms around her waist for reasons beyond trying to quell his vertigo. She blushed, eyes alight with another emotion apart from her euphoria at the sensation of flight. Kakashi smiled gently behind his mask as she leant backwards against him.

Oh if only that trusting action hadn't made him even more aware of his ginger hold on the bird's slippery back…

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wild-filly: Once again, standard drill – will update as and when I can, so please review and give me whatever feedback you deem important… or even if it's purely random. I like that as well (happy grin)