The Beta (I adore you, Temple Mistress!) has cleared this chapter for posting (with extensive revisions, of course, lol) so I bring it to you for a little Friday treat! Please see individual review replies at the bottom of the chapter! Thank you again for all the extreme lovies sent to me - you're making this fic that much more loved in my heart (becase I really did not like it before posting, lol).

Once again, I have to put the boys through the wringer, lol. But... well, I would finish that sentence, but who wants to have plot spoilers?

Luvs!

X


III – Anakin is 14 years old

"I really hate you sometimes," Anakin informed his Master angrily, storming into the room and flinging himself down on the couch in a huff.

"For Sith's sake, Anakin, stop acting like such a child," Obi-Wan snapped, dropping his kitbag and pushing one hand though his hair.

"I am a child," Anakin replied petulantly, crossing his arms and scowling, drawing his legs up onto the couch cushions. Obi-Wan, unfortunately, seemed completely impervious to his Padawan's glower, though Anakin was frowning so hard that his face hurt.

"Really?" Obi-Wan mused dryly, dropping into a chair in exhaustion, as though too tired to even bother fighting. "Earlier in the week, when you were more than ready to contradict me at every turn, you seemed to think you should be treated as an adult."

Anakin fumed as Obi-Wan stared at the ceiling for a moment before letting his eyes drift closed. As usual, his Master was completely missing the point – ignoring Anakin's argument completely to make a comment that wasn't even relevant.

'You never listen to me," he huffed, drawing himself up slightly so that he could make another show of flopping backwards onto the couch cushions.

"A common apperceived affliction in Padawans." Obi-Wan replied quietly, shooting him a sidelong look, his mouth curved into the ghost of a smile.

Anakin scowled at that, sensing that Obi-Wan was somehow making fun of him. He didn't like being made fun of, especially when it was Obi-Wan doing it. Qui-Gon had never teased him, not in a mean way, and the other Padawans had stopped after he got to know them. Obi-Wan was the only one who still made fun of Anakin; he had been doing it for years, and still wasn't tired of it. Qui-Gon had said once that if Anakin just ignored the people making fun of him, then they would stop eventually.

But Anakin couldn't very well ignore his Master, and Obi-Wan wasn't stopping. It wasn't fair at all. The worst part was that Obi-Wan was never nice about his teasing – it was never a friendly joke, or something they could laugh about together. No, he always went out of his way to make Anakin feel like a stupid little kid. Like he was useless, or inferior.

And then Anakin would remember what Obi-Wan had screamed at him the night he had become Anakin's Master, and wonder if he really was as useless as Obi-Wan thought him to be. If he really was inferior to Obi-Wan.

He certainly wasn't as clever; Obi-Wan read all the time, and seemed irritated that Anakin preferred tinkering with droids to flipping though dusty old codices – Obi-Wan wouldn't even read holofiles, like the rest of the galaxy did. And he had started using bigger words when reprimanding Anakin, so that he could win the argument by vocabulary alone. Anakin couldn't very well fight back when he had no farking clue what his Master had just said, after all. 'Apperceived affliction', Sith hell!

Their last mission together had started out so well too. His Master had been relaxed for a change, had smiled at Anakin and let him help out with the diplomacy. It wasn't that big a deal that Anakin had gone podracing with the King's son – well, it wouldn't have been that big a deal if Obi-Wan hadn't overreacted. How was Anakin supposed to know that the stupid Prince didn't know a podracer from a bantha's ass? How was he supposed to know that beating the little snot in a race would result in such an uproar? It had ended up undoing almost all of his and Obi-Wan's work for the entire mission, and they had been required to stay an extra ten-day just to sort everything out.

Obi-Wan had not been pleased at all. Anakin didn't know when he had last seen his Master so angry. But to take it out on Anakin like this? It was the Solstice! He even had found a present for Obi-Wan, in the hopes that it would make the Jedi Knight like him a little better, and would somehow make up for Anakin being a less-than-desirable Padawan.

If he had known that Obi-Wan would ignore the holiday all together, he would have just saved his credits. Not that anything would make Obi-Wan like Anakin any better anyways. His Master hated him; there was no doubt about it.

Deciding to try once more – Obi-Wan did seem a little happier now that they were home, after all, Anakin shifted on the couch slightly, studying his Master.

"I don't understand," he whined, hugging a pillow against his chest and staring owlishly at Obi-Wan. "Why can't we celebrate the Solstice? I said I was sorry about the sith-damned race!" Anakin pleaded, jiggling his knees impatiently. Obi-Wan was just so damn prickly all the time.

"Padawan!" Obi-Wan snapped, and Anakin bit his lip. Obi-Wan didn't like it when Anakin swore, even though all the other Padawans did it as well.

"But I am sorry, Master!" Anakin pressed on, hoping that Obi-Wan would overlook his transgression for the moment.

"That's not the point, Anakin. The point is that you deliberately disobeyed me again," Obi-Wan growled, staring at Anakin intently. "I told you to forget about the races, no matter what Prince Karfan said to you. I gave you a direct order, Padawan, but you seemed to think yourself above my decisions. That is unacceptable."

Anakin automatically leaned backwards, pressing himself into the cushions as though they would swallow him up. He didn't like it when Obi-Wan was mad at him, but when his Master was disappointed in him it felt even worse. The way those eyes seemed to darken slightly, seeing into Anakin's soul. It made Anakin sad. He desperately wanted Obi-Wan to like him, to be proud of his Padawan. That's why he had given into that little snot-nose Karfan's teasing: he had said that no Jedi could outrace a Nankarrian. It wasn't injured pride that had made Anakin accept that challenge; he had wanted to impress Obi-Wan with his skill as a racer. His Master had missed the Boonta Eve race; after all… he had just wanted to prove that he wasn't worthless.

Besides, that piece of bantha-poodoo had said some nasty things about Obi-Wan; he had deserved to have his royal face ploughed into the dust.

Not that Anakin could ever tell Obi-Wan that. Not that his Master would believe him if he did. This was just ridiculous. Anakin had said he was sorry over and over, but Obi-Wan just wouldn't listen to him! He just kept repeating his lecture about how Anakin had to respect Obi-Wan's decisions, that he was the Master and Anakin was the Padawan – as if Anakin was able to forget that for a single second.

It just wasn't fair. Qui-Gon would have understood Anakin. Qui-Gon had always listened to Anakin, heard out his opinions and included him in things. Obi-Wan just wanted to shut him out instead. It hurt, sometimes. Anakin knew that Obi-Wan had never wanted him, but couldn't he at least pretend?

Of course, bringing up Qui-Gon as an example of how Obi-Wan should be acting was the quickest way Anakin knew of pissing off his Master. Obi-Wan's eyes would widen in hurt shock, his face paling, and then Anakin would be curtly ordered to his room to meditate. Obi-Wan had never struck Anakin again – not since Solstice Night two years ago. But every time Anakin mentioned Qui-Gon sarcastically, the look on Obi-Wan's face would make Anakin cringe inwardly, wondering just how far he could push before Obi-Wan lashed out at him again. So far, nothing of the sort had happened – Anakin had just spent a lot of time meditating. It was almost as bad as being hit, he sometimes thought, and it lasted a lot longer.

But that was definitely the button to push when he wanted to hurt Obi-Wan. He had found that out once after a fight.

His Master had been still been standing in the centre of the room, but with his hands loose at his sides as though he didn't know what to do with himself. After a moment – in which Anakin hadn't dared to breathe – Obi-Wan had grabbed a bottle from the liquor cabinet and sagged down onto the couch. He hadn't made a sound, and the room had been too dark to make out his facial expression. But when Obi-Wan had suddenly buried his face in his hands, Anakin had known that his Master was crying.

He had stopped bringing up Master Qui-Gon after that.

"But it's a tradition…" Anakin said quietly, hugging his pillow tightly.

"No, Padawan, it was a tradition. It was your tradition, not mine. It was never mine!"

Seeing that Obi-Wan's hands were clenched into fists on his knees, Anakin gently set his pillow aside and shifter forward. Maybe this was his chance to bridge some of the gap between him and his Master. Tentatively, Anakin leaned forward to carefully touch Obi-Wan on the knee. "I know you miss Master Qui-Gon as well –"

"This isn't about that!" Obi-Wan exploded, pushing Anakin's hand away and standing abruptly, striding over to the window. Anakin turned on the couch, watching him silently. He could see Obi-Wan's reflection, shimmering over the scene of Coruscant's skyline. His Master's eyes were tightly shut, his mouth compressed in a tight line. "It's… it's… Anakin, we've never celebrated this before –"

Ah! An opening! "Only because we were on a mission to Bespin last year –" Anakin began eagerly.

"That's not the point!" Obi-Wan yelled, whirling to face him. Anakin froze immediately, bringing his hands up to shield himself reflexively. He had pushed too far; he should have left well enough alone. Obi-Wan didn't want to connect with Anakin, stupid, useless Anakin. He sucked in a quick breath, wondering if Obi-Wan would hit him this time.

But Obi-Wan's anger faltered instantly as he stared in mute shock at his cringing Padawan.

"Anakin, I just…I-I'm sorry Anakin, I didn't…I…"

Gingerly relaxing, letting his arms fall back to his sides, Anakin hesitantly met Obi-Wan's eyes. He saw something in Obi-Wan's expression crumple, even though his outward appearance didn't change at all. It was in Obi-Wan's eyes that the shift occurred. While they were bright green when Obi-Wan was tired or mad, the grey in them took over when his Master was upset. Anakin could see that they were as silvery as a mirror now, and as clouded as the Coruscanti sky behind him.

Anakin took a step forward, wanting to hug Obi-Wan, to tell him that it was ok, that he understood. But Obi-Wan instantly drew himself back up, shoulders rigid, arms tucked into the sleeves of his robe. Unapproachable once more.

"Anakin, don't…just…don't." Obi-Wan took a deep breath, taking a few moments to gather himself. "I'm not going to celebrate this ridiculous holiday. It's wasteful and unnecessary, and you're getting too old for such frivolity. If you're so intent on having a party, you can celebrate with the younglings in the Temple."

Anakin jerked back from that verbal slap, flinching slightly. "Fine," he snapped, hands clenching into fists as he stomped over to the hallway.

"You know," he added, spinning on one heel to face his silent Master. "I know that you never wanted me. I know that you resent me. But I just thought that for one day this year, you could at least act like you cared. Just for one day." He sniffled, glaring at Obi-Wan, who was still gazing straight ahead, refusing to look at Anakin. He saw Obi-Wan tremble slightly at Anakin's words, as though they were blaster bolts that had hit him instead.

"It wasn't about Qui-Gon, either, just so you know." Anakin added softly, feeling his lips tremble slightly. He fought to keep his voice even, digging his fingernails harder against the palms of his hands. "I miss him too, but… I wanted to get to know you better. We… you and I never just talk. And I didn't need a present or anything… just to… I don't know." He gestured helplessly at the bare room, and then shook his head sharply, drawing his arms tightly across his chest. "Just forget it. I'll celebrate with the other younglings," Anakin spat the last injecting all the scorn he could summon up into that last word.

"Anakin, I –"

But Anakin didn't listen, retreating back into his room and locking it from the inside. Obi-Wan could still open it, of course, but they had an unspoken agreement that each would respect the other's right to be alone. Anakin hadn't wanted Obi-Wan as a Master, and Obi-Wan certainly hadn't wanted Anakin as a Padawan. Considering that mutual dislike, they deliberately were alone more often than not – physically together, but emotionally completely apart. Always, without exception.

Anakin had dared to hope that something would come of their relationship, after feeling that strong bond that had sparked between them. But Obi-Wan had blocked it off almost immediately, sealing away his mind and keeping Anakin locked out of his thoughts and emotions.

It hurt Anakin; that his Master wouldn't even allow the most rudimentary of training bonds to exist between them. He didn't want Anakin to be close to him, didn't want to be close to anybody. He didn't try to understand how Anakin felt, and Anakin knew that Obi-Wan didn't feel anything any more, not since Qui-Gon had died; he was the perfect Jedi, after all. Emotions were beneath him. Qui-Gon had probably just been a… 'regrettable lapse'. That's how Obi-Wan would probably put it.

Anakin couldn't empathize with him even if he wanted to. And he didn't want to. He didn't care about Obi-Wan.

He didn't care at all.

Collapsing back onto his bed, Anakin stared moodily up at the ceiling, arms crossed behind his head. Distantly, he heard their front door open and close. Obi-Wan had gone out again. That was how their evenings ended more and more often in the past year; they would argue, Anakin would storm off to his room and Obi-Wan would leave. Anakin had never dared to follow him beyond the doors of the Temple, but he would always wait up to hear his Master come home. Sometimes Anakin heard someone else in the apartment with Obi-Wan, and he would curl up into a tight ball on his bed, hands clenched in impotent rage. He wasn't an idiot; he knew that Obi-Wan was fucking someone else, even though the… the whore was always gone the next day.

Anakin hated Obi-Wan for that, for betraying Qui-Gon's memory. Hated him for taking other lovers – though Anakin doubted that Obi-Wan was even capable of love – to erase all traces of Qui-Gon from their apartments. But most of all, Anakin hated Obi-Wan for daring to bring his lovers back to their apartment, into the home that Anakin had shared with him and Qui-Gon. It didn't matter that his Master tried to be discrete – Obi-Wan was blocking Anakin out to screw around with someone else, and it hurt. It hurt because Obi-Wan was only supposed to care about Qui-Gon…Qui-Gon and Anakin. Nobody else. Because somebody else would mean that Obi-Wan had never really loved Qui-Gon after all…and that the family that they had been was nothing but a lie.

But it was on those mornings, after Anakin mastered his anger enough to come out into the common room, that Obi-Wan seemed the saddest. He would spend the whole day meditating; at least he said he was meditating, but Anakin didn't believe him. It seemed rather that he spent those days staring blankly at the holograph of him and Qui-Gon; the one taken on the day of Obi-Wan's knighting ceremony. His shields were always tighter than usual on those mornings however, so Anakin could barely sense his Master through the Force at all, much less figure out what he was thinking.

But his eyes were always sad.

Anakin had a holograph in his room as well. It had been taken five years ago, Anakin didn't remember who by. He was standing in the centre, smiling hugely at the camera. Kneeling on one side of him, a quiet smile on his leonine features, was Qui-Gon Jinn, one hand resting father-like on Anakin's shoulder. On his other side was Obi-Wan, fresh from his Knighting, looking decidedly uncomfortable, but putting on a vague smile for Qui-Gon's sake.

It was the only picture that Anakin still had of the three of them together. Obi-Wan had taken away the others, saying something about Jedi not needing possessions. But Anakin slept with it under his pillow, one hand clutched tightly at the frame, whispering his plea into the Force.

(Please let him like me. Please. Please Qui-Gon; let him start to like me.)

He didn't remember falling asleep, and had only a dim memory of hands gently pulling off his belt and overtunic, lifting his legs lightly to pull the blankets over him properly. There was a faint impression of someone stroking his hair, but Anakin was sure that it was just a dream, a memory of his life back on Tatooine. When there had been someone to care about what happened to him….

----

The room was dark when Anakin awoke with a start, momentarily disorienting him. He didn't know what it was that alerted him. Anakin lay still in his bed, hardly daring to breathe, listening hard.

There! A scratching sort of sound, coupled with a muttered curse. Anakin slid from his bed noiselessly, palming open his door and slipping into the hallway. Across the way, Obi-Wan's door was wide open. In the intermittent light of the traffic passing outside the window, Anakin could see that the bed was undisturbed. The sight made him hesitate – what if his Master was in the other room with a lover? Anakin would never hear the end of it if he interrupted that. He would be meditating for a month or more.

"Fucking Sith!"

That was Obi-Wan's voice, followed by the sound of something falling over with a muffled thump.

Waving his hand to call up the lights, Anakin blinked sharply at the sight that met his eyes.

Obi-Wan stood frozen on one side of the room, eyes wide as he stared at Anakin. A pinear tree lay on the floor, long blue-green needles scattered everywhere over the floor. His Master's cheeks flushed bright red as he glanced away, looking down at the ground in embarrassment.

"Master? What are you…?" Anakin began slowly, trying hard not to smile.

"I…I'm, ah…" Obi-Wan cast around for something to look at, eyes falling everywhere except for meeting Anakin's own. "I reconsidered about, ah…about the Solstice. Is this not right?" His voice sounded terribly uncertain as he turned his gaze back to the fallen tree.

"That's a pretty crappy tree, Master," Anakin answered, trying not to laugh. "The needles are all falling off, see?"

"I knew that the 'deal' I was offered was too good to be true…" Obi-Wan muttered, running one hand through his coppery hair.

"Let me help you with that," Anakin offered, narrowing his eyes and reaching into the Force.

Obi-Wan frowned half-heartedly as the tree rose elegantly from the floor, setting itself smoothly in its holder. "You know, Padawan, you really aren't supposed to use the Force for things like this…."

"I'm sorry, Master," Anakin grinned, eyes sparkling.

"If only I could believe that…."

"I just could tell that you needed some help. This is the first time you've ever had to deal with setting up for the Solstice..." Anakin laughed quietly, "You know, Master Qui-Gon kept dropping the tree the first time we did it as well. He wanted everything to be perfect for when you came over –" he cut himself off abruptly, realising he had brought up Qui-Gon again. Obi-Wan was sure to be pissed about that; he went and did something for the Padawan he hated and….

Obi-Wan sat down on the couch, raising one hand as though to stem Anakin's morose thoughts. Without raising his eyes to Anakin's, he sighed quietly. "I don't hate you Anakin, I…I never have."

Anakin trembled slightly. He hadn't said anything aloud… had Obi-Wan heard his thoughts again? Was he opening up their bond? Anakin caught his breath, hardly daring to hope. "Then… then why did you say that you did?"

Obi-Wan stared intently at his clasped hands, his voice as small and hurt as Anakin's own as he replied. "Because… because I was angry. Angry that… that I was never his 'Chosen One.' Because…" he laughed sadly, helplessly, "because I'm not very good at being a Master." his eyes flickered up to meet Anakin's briefly, before returning to study his hands.

"I-I know… that I'm not the Master that you want me to be. But I am trying, Anakin."

Anakin bit his lip, feeling how forlorn and uncertain Obi-Wan was through the Force – ripples of emotion were echoing through the room, with his Master at their centre. Sitting down next to Obi-Wan, Anakin tentatively set one hand on his Master's shoulder – it was something he had seen Qui-Gon do to Obi-Wan before whenever the young Jedi was feeling doubtful or insecure. Obi-Wan tensed automatically at the touch, turning his head to stare at Anakin.

"I think you're doing all right," Anakin assured him, forcing a smile. "Master Qui-Gon would be proud."

A faint smile touched Obi-Wan's lips. Anakin could see the glow that his words had kindled in his Master – as bright as a Nubian dawn. It made Obi-Wan's stern features seem… softer somehow. It made him look younger.

"Just a second," Anakin said swiftly, rising from the couch and dashing back to his room, rummaging under his bed for the present. There hadn't been any time to wrap it, but Anakin hoped that didn't matter to Obi-Wan. He had a feeling it wouldn't.

Sliding back into the main room, Anakin proudly handed the framed holograph over. It had taken him forever to find one he really liked, but Master Windu had helped. It was a holo of Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon together, one that Master Windu claimed he had taken before either one of them had realized he was there. Anakin could believe it – he had never seen any other holos of his Master and Qui-Gon kissing. Obi-Wan's arms were thrown around the taller Jedi's neck, an expression of bliss on his face. As though there were no place in the galaxy he would rather be than secure in Qui-Gon's arms.

Anakin had hugged Master Windu for helping him find it – the stern Jedi Master had looked positively unnerved by that display of affection from one of his least-favourite Padawans.

But it was worth it, for the look on Obi-Wan's face. His Master opened his mouth as though to speak, but no words were forthcoming as he blinked rapidly. Anakin saw that his Master's hands were trembling on the frame, and impulsively, he snuggled closer to Obi-Wan's side.

Setting the holo reverently down on the small table, Obi-Wan turned to face Anakin fully. Anakin forgot to breathe for a moment; his Master's eyes were bright blue, clearer than the Temple pools and shiny with unshed tears. A delicate brush at his mind, and Anakin let his shields drop.

Emotion.

Anakin gasped as the hurt and love and gratitude and loneliness of his Master washed over his mind through the bond which flared like a beacon between them. After a moment, Anakin sent back his own tentative touch – love and worry and uncertainty. Had he done wrong to give Obi-Wan the picture, to remind his Master of everything that he had lost? Would Obi-Wan be upset with him again and close off the bond once more?

(No Padawan. Never again.)

With that silent promise, Obi-Wan suddenly pulled Anakin forward into a tight embrace. The force of it nearly drove the air out of Anakin's lungs, but he didn't care because it was his Master hugging him and Obi-Wan did really like him after all, and Anakin didn't have to be alone anymore and –

(Slow down, young one. You'll overwhelm me, thinking that loudly.) His Master's voice sounded wry in Anakin's head, but his tight embrace lessened somewhat, allowing Anakin to breathe again.

(Sorry Master.) But he wasn't really sorry. Not really. He was too happy to be sorry. Sighing in contentment, Anakin rested his head on Obi-Wan's shoulder and closed his eyes.

"Thank you," Obi-Wan said quietly against Anakin's ear. "I regret that I don't have anything to give you in return…."

"Well…" Reluctantly, Anakin pulled away, making a show of thinking about it carefully. "You could let me get a tattoo, you know…."

"I don't think so, Padawan." Obi-Wan responded with a faint smile.

"Come on! That whiny little prince had one, he showed me!" Anakin bounced up and down on the couch, shaking Obi-Wan's shoulder enthusiastically. "I could get a Delta-4, or… or… two crossed lightsabres! Or –"

"Anakin, that's hardly the point here. You're not a prince –"

"Like you need to tell me that… OH! I could get 'My Master is a Sith Killer' in red and black letters, and –"

"Anakin, this is not open to discussion!"

"Well, how about taking me to a bar?"

"You're fourteen!"

"I'll be fifteen soon! Come on, Master, don't be such an old fart!"

"I... I… What did you just call me?"

Anakin didn't reply. The scandalized look on Obi-Wan's face, coupled with the fact that the austere Jedi Master still had pinear needles tangled in his hair, was enough to send him into a fit of uncontrollable laughter.

"What did I say? Anakin? Anakin! What are you laughing at? Padawan, what is it? Anakin!"


Of course, then we get shmexy Tattooed!Anakin in Clone Wars (pant pant, faint!) but that's hardly the point.

To replying!

KamquatBanana: I hope that this continues to make you sniffle and all teary!

Vee: Sith girl, you know that I love you UBERMUCH! Thanks for such a loverly review (even after I had to shamelessly plug the chapter to you, hee hee.) I hope that the boy-crush came across even more in this chapter, as it is definitely moving towards some serious love. LOL. It was very painful for me to kill off Qui-Gon sooooo quickly, I have been on such an Obi/Qui kick of late, but I always find myself drawn back to the siren call of the OTP! Yay! I'm glad it caught you off guard, I was thinking that there were huge figurative neon signs pointing right to it, lol! They were indeed on the road to recovery... but I think they're much farther along in this chapter. Thanks for the stupendous review!

inkhit: One of the best chapters? (blushes) you obviously haven't read any of the people on my favourites list. LoL. Thank you very much for the compliment! I shall look into that book that you reccy'd to me - I haven't ever read it, and now I eagerly look forward to doing so! Thanks for the review!

Pureevil: Did this chapter answer your question? There are 8 chapters (at least) to this fic, so it has a ways to go yet. But all of them were written in the space of about two days, so they need extensive revision before I can post. Thanks for reading!

TM: I have nothing more to say than I LOVE YOU! And uberthanks for bringing this one up to snuff as well. HUGGLES!

Monchy: Twisted and Sithly though it may be, I'm glad that it hurt you when Qui-Gon died so suddenly. I always love to hear when something I've written carries an emotional impact. Especially when one of my verrrrrry favourite authors tells me as much! The contradictions are still very much there (as you saw), but I think that the two of them are well on their way to being able to tolerate - and eventually love - each other. Not to say that the angsty-queen doesn't have a few more roadblocks to throw into their path. Bwahaha. Glad that you're enjoying the story so far and thank you so much for the review! (I'm sorry that ff.n was being pissy about your posting it, and I appreciate your perseverence, lol!)

xrai: And with you as well! I'm glad that my little stories are the exception to the norm on slash-reading!

Brynne!: Yeah, it was pretty hard to write Obi-Wan losing it like that, because he's normally so in control of himself, you know? (One of the things that Anakin hates, of course, lol). But no one could keep all of that locked up inside, and well... I wanted to make an impact. I'm glad that I did! I think that Anakin is just as volotile as his Master - he just displays it better - and the quick shift in perspective was from him suddenly seeing that oh, wait a minute, Obi-Wan is incredibly hurt as well. Silly Anakin. LoL. Catharsis, definitely... (but when Anakin grows up, there will be a rather different form of catharsis. heh.)

alchemy dream: Darling! Thank you for the great review! It was a lot of fun toying with this new dynamic - I've never before tried to write the relationship between Anakin and Obi-Wan with the shadow of Qui-Gon's death being so immediate over them. I'm glad that my 'illustration' came across so well -- for some reason, this was an intensely visual fic for me to write. It was, in fact, a single mental image that prompted me to start it (the one where Anakin sees Obi and Qui kissing in chapter 1). So I'm glad that my artist friend saw that aspect of it as well!. And I left them all happy again, you'll note! They keep getting closer and closer... far beyond my abilities as angstmeister to try and keep them apart! LOL.

HarryEstel: Well, I knew that for Obi-Wan and Anakin to end up together, Qui-Gon would have to go eventually. And sooner rather than later, so I could play with the relationship between Baby!Anakin and Angsty!Obi-Wan. But it hurt to write it as well... (sniffles). I love Qui-Gon too much!

Phoenix: You sobbed like a baby! (punches air in triumph) YES! Sorry. That was my Sithly side talking. I'm so glad that this came across as being very human, because I was wanting to explore that side of the Jedi. They're supposed to be so serene and centered and at peace... but they're still human (Well. Some of them.. (thinking of Yoda, Plo Koon, etc)). I did want to put Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon together at least for a while... and in a way, I think that made it both harder and easier for Obi-Wan to let him go. Harder, because he had something so good and precious in Qui's love... and easier, because he wasn't consumed with angst over the "ifs". He knew Qui loved him at the time of his death... whether that added to his guilt or not, well... I'll leave that up to you guys!

Alley: I made you cry! Yay! (cough cough). It didn't cross your mind that he would die? But this is an Obi/Ani -- says so in the blurb. LoL. I tease. Thank you for reading!

Lea: You wanted to smack Obi-Wan? Well... I can see that, actually. But for me, I think that Anakin deserved what he got - to say something so intensely hurtful to Obi-Wan immediately after he lost someone so precious to him. But that's just my point of view - if Anakin is old enough to scream 'fuck' etc, then he's old enough to pay for it. I know that not everybody would agree with me on that though... and this is why I dont deal with children, lol! (laughs). Thanks for reading!

Aryll: I hope you were crying in this chapter as well!