A/N: Melinda is worried she doesn't have enough time with her family... enjoy xx Mariah
Ages:
Jim - 40
Melinda - 36
Katie - 11
Hannah - 11
Aaron - 6
Mackenzie - 3 months
Melinda sat hunched over on the edge of her bed- it was nearly midday and she hadn't yet washed or dressed. She was beyond tired. Just trying to move or think felt like wading through sludge. And she was failing in the one thing she had to do today.
The reason for her exhaustion lay in her arms, screaming with as much force as her three-month-old lungs could manage. Once again Melinda tried to coax her daughter's mouth onto her nipple, desperate for relief from the pressure building in her milk-engorged bosom and aching inside at her inability to provide food for her hungry infant, but Mackenzie had reached a place beyond hunger.
Scarlet-faced and shaking, her furious screams blared at a pitch that made Melinda's heart bleed. She wanted nothing more than to be able to soothe her baby, to give her everything she needed, to feed her till she reached that state of nirvana where milk oozed out the side of her mouth whilst she suckled, slumbering on her breast.
"Please baby girl, just try to calm down for mama. I'm right here... everything is just fine," she begged, putting her little finger into the angry heat of Mackenzie's mouth.
Immediately the baby clamped down, pulling on her flesh. Her eyelids closed, although the scowl remained on her forehead and an angry tear trickled down her soft cheek as, with trembling aftershocks, her breathing settled at last. It was definitely food Mackenzie needed but she seemed unable to latch on to eat today. Melinda ran through a list of other possible causes for her distress; no foul diaper smell, nothing rubbing or pricking her in her clothing; she had undressed her down to her diaper as she'd looked so red with screaming. There was no fever. Tired? Yes, they were both tired- this had started around midnight.
"Was it a nightmare little one?" she murmured, naturally falling into the gentle rocking motion of motherhood. "Mommy had one earlier too. I know how it feels." Oh so carefully, she eased her daughter closer to her and as smoothly as she could she slid her finger away to be replaced by her nipple. The burning pain as her well-used breast was guzzled down into her baby girl's throat caused her to bite the inside of her cheek, desperate not to disturb the peace by flinching at this delicate moment.
It looked almost as if Mackenzie nodded in reply as she finally accepted what she needed. Her tiny fist grasped possessively at her mother's breast to hold her closer to her. "I will never leave you. Never. I'll always be here for you." Her reassurances turned into a quiet humming; the words to the song had left her just now, as had most thoughts in her hormone-addled mind Melinda lamented with an inward sigh.
Outside the room she could hear the sound of a faucet being turned on, water running into the bathtub, sloshing as it was swirled around and giggles from her son. Footsteps went up and down the stairs and Katie and Hannah could be heard laughing too. Sometimes it bothered her, being bound by the demands of her newborn's testy appetite.
She had spent the last six months mostly confined to her rocking chair or her bedroom because of the trouble with her pregnancy and then the birth after. A time when usually she would have been working and being a mom to her other two children, and with the occasional ghost. But today she was too tired to feel anything but glad that Mackenzie was being fed and Jim was around, seeing to whatever else needed seeing to.
The creak of the floorboards told her he was trying to tread softly as he approached the room. The door had been left ajar, and he peered in, wary of causing any disturbance.
"You did it!" He said as he drank in the beautiful sight of Melinda cradling their child.
Her dark hair was loose, falling down one side of her neck, leaving the smooth skin and graceful lines of her shoulder and collar bones exposed, her nightshirt having been shrugged off in the struggle to satisfy Mackenzie. He had tried to help, but Melinda had asked him to leave her to it and he knew she would have been unhappy if she couldn't do this herself today.
"Is it safe for me to come in?" He asked.
She nodded her permission, welcoming the sense of completeness he brought as he settled carefully next to her, his arms wrapping around her. Mackenzie continued to gorge herself, unaware of the two sets of loving eyes that watched, still in awe that they had made this perfect little creature. Jim held up the cup of juice he'd brought, knowing that breastfeeding was thirsty work. Melinda's arms were taken with their daughter, so he held the glass up to her lips for her to sip, and then gulp down.
"I needed that. Thank you for everything you've done today," she said with relish after he had tipped out the very last drops, watching them drop one by one onto her tongue.
"I would do anything for you after what the family you have given us." He said as he put the glass down, freeing his hand up to touch her cheek, and pressed a light kiss onto her shoulder, then her neck and her cheeks, and lastly her lips. "You are a wonderful mother, Melinda," he whispered, as once again Melinda's softly sucking presence took their attention. "I love you so much."
Melinda smiled and kissed him languidly and smiled. "I know this might sound silly, but I think Mackenzie was so upset because of a nightmare. I had a vision earlier and it woke me from my sleep," she took a sidelong glance to see if he was going to laugh at her.
"I don't see why babies wouldn't have dreams too," he considered, smiling at Mackenzie as she suckled the milk from her. "They probably have more dreaming to do than adults, with all the new things they have to take in and digest. We both know how connected you are to Katie and Aaron with your gift, so who knows with this little one."
She was relieved he could understand this the way she did. "It's just my intuition, but I think she had a bad dream and I wasn't there when she woke up. I think she was a bit angry with me too, for not being there."
His grip around her waist subtly tightened, understanding these feelings only too well. "You better not be blaming yourself if that's what I am hearing," he chided gently. "You have always been here for Mackenzie, every second of every day. There is no doubt about that. You nearly died when she came into this world, Mel."
Looking into his clear blue eyes and knowing how much he knew this from his own experience, she leaned in to bestow a kiss. She loved him more than ever after working through their difficult times, finding joy where they could. Against the odds, it was a good life they had made together. Eventually, the rolling motion of Mackenzie suckling slowed and her grip on Melinda slackened as she slipped into the bliss that only a belly full of milk and the scent of her parents could bring.
"Both of the kids are both in their rooms. Hannah is staying over, but I assume you heard the girls already." He said, peering down at Mackenzie. He traced his finger over her pouted lips and looked up at Melinda. "I'll hold Mackenzie and put her down for bed if you want to go see the kids and take a shower or something."
Melinda inched herself up to standing and considered the bassinet prepared for Mackenzie to sleep in, but with a flash of a smile, she slipped her into Jim's strong arms.
"That would be perfect," she smiled, kissing him briefly. "Thank you."
And why would she deprive her child of a chance to be close to her daddy? If anyone could make their daughter feel safe again it would be her father. Melinda went to her closet and changed into a more comfortable pair of leggings and a shirt before leaving their bedroom. Melinda was grateful to take the opportunity for a few minutes with her other children. Maybe there was some time for a little indulgence now.
She knocked before she pushed the cracked door open and peeked into her eldest daughter's room.
"Come in," Katie laughed and peered over her shoulder as her mom walked in, leaving the door a bit more ajar as she came to sit by her on the bed. "Mom! I've missed you today. Daddy said Kenzie was having trouble eating."
"Yeah. It's been a long day for me and your sister," she sighed, wrapping her arm around her. "I've missed you too, Katiebug. So much. Trust me." She kissed her cheek and hugged her. "I can't forget you either Hannah, come on. Hugs all around."
The other girl who sat beside Katie hugged her as well, giggling. "I've missed you too," Hannah said.
"So, how was summer school?" She asked them, smiling at Katie.
"It was good. A new boy moved to town and we met him today. He moved here from California and Hannah really likes him," Katie snickered and then flopped down on her back.
"I do not!" Hannah gasped and then threw a pillow at her. "Katie! Shut up! Or I'll tell your mom about who you like."
"What's that about liking boys? I know who Katie likes," she winked and then giggled with them. How she wished she could be ten years old again. "Right?"
"Maybe," she whispered, shrugging. "I don't really have a crush on anyone in my class anyway."
"Well, that's okay too," Melinda nodded. "You'll know when you have a crush." Katie nodded and then sat up again, hugging her mother. "What's with the second hug?"
"I've just missed you," Katie whispered, sighing. "A lot. You weren't gone all the time when Aaron was born, so this is a bit different."
"I know, bug," Melinda said, rubbing her back. "Come with me, okay?. I want to talk to you and your brother about all this. That'll give Hannah time to call her mom and say good night, right?"
"Right," Hannah nodded.
"Is this one of your serious talks?" Katie asked, just before her mother opened the door.
"No, not really." She smiled brightly at her, rubbing her back as she pulled her in for a hug, kissing her head lightly. "Don't worry. I just want you both to know how hard all of this on me too. I don't want to be away from either of you. Believe me."
"I believe you, mom," Katie said, smiling up at her.
For Jim, this felt like one of those perfect moments he could barely believe was real. His youngest daughter laid peacefully sleeping in his arms; Melinda was singing as she showered. He closed his eyes and reveled in the here and now, savoring each smell and sound and feel. Mackenzie's body snuggled against him, her deep sleeping breaths rhythmically moving her chest in and out.
The flowery scent of Melinda combined with Mackenzie's powdered baby smell filled the air with a fragrance of womanhood. All of this with the backing track of Melinda's singing. Her voice had grown a little huskier over the years, particularly on the long notes. He found it decidedly sexy.
She came back clean and refreshed, wrapped in a towel. "She's still asleep!" She must have expected Mackenzie to be waiting for her nightly feeding before bed.
"No, she is still fast asleep. I think she " Jim decided to take the lead and lay their child down in her bassinet before Melinda could take her again. He shifted up the bed making space for her to join him. "I was thinking that you must be missing the store," he started.
Melinda nodded, "I do sometimes, but Mackenzie is more important right now." She explained. "Especially because she was born so early and only just came home a few weeks ago. The store can wait."
"Why don't you take her with you?" He asked. "You could keep her near you and work in the back."
Melinda shrugged, walking around the bed to her side. "I don't know. She's still pretty little. Katie was trying to sit up by now and Mackenzie isn't. And I'm worried even though you aren't supposed to compare your children in their accomplishments." She sighed, sitting down on the bed. "I think I could do it, but only if you would come with us. I think I'd need you with me, at least the first couple of times."
Her words were a gift in return for him. "Of course, Melinda. If you want me to be there then I will come with you," he pulled her into his arms and kissed her hair.
One of the many things she loved about their relationship was that, even after fifteen years, their interactions were still punctuated with kisses. But their kisses had become too chaste of late. He'd been keeping his hands to himself since Mackenzie was born, aware of how tired and sore breastfeeding had left her. She missed the intimacy of sex. More than missed it, she hungered for it. Unable to find the words to broach the subject, she dipped her hand under his t-shirt to feel the warmth of his belly. Slowly, she slid her palm over his skin, until her thumb brushed over his nipple.
"Have you missed this?" she asked.
"Of course I have. But I can see how drained you are." He said softly, smiling at her. "And I'm not asking for anything."
"I've missed it, too," she replied, pulling his shirt up and gently biting his chest. "Having Mackenzie doesn't stop me needing you to be a lover as well as a partner."
She looked up shyly through her eyelashes to find his blue eyes burning into her. She could feel his heart beating against his ribs.
"Now?" he asked.
No sooner had she nodded than he had her in his arms, the towel unwrapping to be left behind as he gathered her up. It didn't seem right to be so close to their newest child whilst he did what he wanted to do to her mother.
But to have Melinda naked in his arms was something he had been craving for weeks. She might have been worried about the effect of having a baby on her body, but he found her curves, created by love and hard labor, entirely arousing. Kneading the flesh of her thigh, he laid down on top of her. She moved her hands over his chest and down his sides, impatiently taking the edges of his shirt and pulling it over his head. She pressed her full breasts up against his chest and ran her hand over his stiffening cock.
"We might have to be quick," she breathed, sighing as he sucked the pulse at the base of her neck. "We don't know how long Mackenzie will stay asleep."
He couldn't help but smile at this. If she needed him to be quick then he was here to oblige. "Do you know what t I've really been craving," he asked, his voice low and filled with desire as he guided her on to her knees.
"What?" She could feel herself trembling. Just the expectation, along with his slow caresses, carefully palming her nipples rather than plucking the sore skin, had her aching for him. He ran his hand down between her legs to cup her, dipping a finger to find her nub as he claimed her mouth with a deep kiss.
"I've been craving your beautiful, sweet juices on my tongue." He murmured the words onto her lips, making her hips thrust towards him. His finger slipped further down and into her wet folds. "Delicious," he grinned.
They kissed again, the hunger they had for each other taking over for a while before he broke away, trailing his mouth, nibbling and licking, from her earlobe, down her neck, to her chest. Down across her belly, teasing the inside of her thigh with slow kisses, his fingers brushed over her slit, gently parting the folds. When at last his tongue flicked over her, she was already moaning for him. It was a glorious sight for him, peering up between her thighs to see Melinda lose herself in what he was doing to her.
Greedily he ate from her, lapping his tongue inside, curling it around to taste as much of her as he could reach. She was panting hard now, her breasts heaving as she bit on her lip in an effort to keep her noises down. He had missed this so much. He pulled back, returning to her center to finish her off, flicking over her without letting up the pressure, until her thighs quaked. She came as he sucked her into his mouth, his name cried out, both a curse and a prayer.
As she lay before him, boneless and flushed, smiling from ear to ear, he leaned back on his knees and took in how beautiful she looked. "Come here," he said and she forced herself up, still floppy and high from her orgasm.
He laid beside her with a breathy smile, his lips meeting hers as she rolled onto her side, toward him. She giggled as he kissed her collarbone, her hands moved over his legs, pulling his pants down quickly as he parted her legs and took ahold of himself. He watched her face as he settled against her and pushed inside. She gasped at the feeling and brought his lips to hers. He thought about how wet and tight she felt against him, how amazing she looked when she moaned.
Unable to fight it, his hips jerked as he dipped himself further into her. "Melinda," he groaned, "Oh love, I love you."
Her arms wound around his neck and he thrust into her again, his head turning to move his mouth down the expanse of her neck. She rolled her hips against him as he pushed in again, her legs wrapping around his waist.
"Right there," she groaned, kissing his neck.
The sound of little feet outside their door worried her, even though the door was locked. They didn't have much more time.
"We are running out of time," she whispered in his ear, her hand reaching down to grasp his ass as he pushed into her again. "Oh, Jim."
He kissed her sloppily, mixing together the tastes of each other on their tongues as his hand moved between them, pressing against her as his hips starting to move quicker in response. "We've got enough time," he reassured her.
The doorknob jiggled and little hands knocked several times. "Mommy?" Aaron asked. "Will you tuck me in again?"
"Mommy will come to your room in a minute, okay baby?" she called out, kissing Jim's throat as she rolled him underneath her.
"Okay, but don't forget mommy," Aaron said and his little feet scurried away loudly as he ran back to his room.
"And you were worried about having enough time," he laughed, pulling her flush against him again.
