A/N:

Yuki's mind update has finally come around for my fans. Say yay, damn you!

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It was 8am that morning.

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The morning when…

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MY MUM CAME FOR A VISIT!

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Gasp!

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Shigure told me to put on my best clothes.

So I put on my best angsty look, too.

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Because Akito came as well.

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"Yuki, here's your Mum"

"Mummy!"

"Yo, what's shakin' bi-atches? Wanna go for a ride in my pimped up ride? It'll be fo shizzle!"

"…"

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I learned the truth, that day.

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My Mum… is a….

GANGSTA SHORTIE.

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omgwtfbbq?

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That's what I was like.

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On a brighter note, Tohru almost died today.

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It all started when Haru and Kyo decided to have one of their stupid fights.

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Tohru, being stupid and caring, ran in the middle, just as…

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"Stupid cat, your going down!"

"Bring it on, ya fat bovine!"

(Haru dives on Kyo, his fists up and fat rolls hanging out)

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It was just then, when Tohru dived in the middle. Haru like, landed right on top of her and almost killed her. Almost.

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Silly bitch. Silly, silly bitch.

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Knockin' on Heavens Door?

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Not me.

Only Hell, thanks.

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I failed my SEX ED class.

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They said,

"Kissing Hatsuharu and giving ever gut wrenching detail is not sufficient enough for a report, Mr. Sohma. Although we all love you and like to kiss your ass, you will have to rewrite it"

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I was,

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So.

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Freakin'.

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Pissed.

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So, I wet myself.

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I like to scare people. For instance, Ritsu.

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"Ritsu! You ruined my life, fo shizzle! I will never be able to live properly again!"

"NOOOO, I'M SO FO FIZZLE AND DO DIZZLE! I NEVER MENT TO! FORGIVE ME! I'M SO SORRY! SOOO TERRIBLY SORRY! FORGIVE ME! I APOLOGISE TO THE WHOLE ENTIRE UNIVERSE, EVERY LIVING PLANT AND ANIMAL AND ALSO TO EVERY INATIMATE OBJECT! I APOLOGISE TO ANYTHING THAT HAS EVER BLEMISHED THE FACE OF THE WORLD! IT'S MY FAULT-"

"Does that mean it's your fault, Kyo's Mum died?"

"…"

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See? That kept him quiet.

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Stupid, cross dressing, Monkey.

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I know a girl who's obsessed with a guy.

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MACHI.

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I hate her. She obsesses over me, I think.

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So, go now.

Go join "The Girly Man", Dukoro-chan and myself in our quest to destroy Machi!

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We all hate her beyond words!

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Haha.

I advertised in my diary slash randomness thingy.

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Bet you didn't expect THAT coming, page number 5 of chapter 009!

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Fo shizzle me wizzle.

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Akito had a bath, because I was there.

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She told Hatori,

"I wont bathe unless Yuki is watching!"

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And so concludes, the epic tales of me.

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No, not really.

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BOO!

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Scared ya.

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Angst Parade.

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It's like "Sesame Street", except it's for emo babies.

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Ohemgee.

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Can you tell me how to get, how to get to ANGST PARADE?

Where everyday there is a masquerade?

Where people live and go unpaid?

Because every single day, they get laid…

ON ANGST PARADE!

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I gathered some random Sohma's and we did that show. Have a look.

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"Hi. I'm… Ayame. I'm very angsty"

"YO YO YO MY FO SHIZZLE I'M AKITO AND I'M ALSO AN ANGSTY GANGSTA!"

"That's not what your script says, Akito"

"Hello. I'm Akito and angst is my middle name. My full name is Akito Angst Sohma"

"M-My name's Tohru… I'm also a resident on the wonderful street called Angst Parade… because I like angst… and because Yuki forced me to live there"

"I'm Kyo and I'm very angsty. See? I can wear black make up, just like you YUKI! And I wore MORE!"

"I didn't wear any…"

"HAHA! Kyo's wearing make up"

"…How very angsty am I…"

"Yo, I'm Hiro. And I'm very emo slash angsty. I like to wear 60 pounds of mascara. For I am-" (Has been bleeped out, or safety reasons).

"…I'M SO SORRY I AM NOT VERY ANGST, FORGIVE ME, FORGIVE ME!"

"I'm Yuki, the angstiest, of all the angsty angsters on Angst Parade. Join us next time, when we… count to number angst and a half"

"Bye…"

"…Seeya"

"ANGST!"

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Fo shizzle.

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A/N:

Randomness.

I'M GONNA WRITE A ONESHOT CALLED ANGST PARADE.

SO READ IT.

HAHAHAHAAAAA!

Review please?