"Just, um, back out if you encounter anything problematic."
John stopped in his tracks and looked back at Rodney. That wasn't what you wanted to hear right before you walked through the mysterious door. "Problematic?"
"Yeah, like poisonous atmosphere, acid atmosphere, no atmosphere. Hey," Rodney pointed at the camera. "It's a MALP on a stick; only shows you so much."
John grimaced, then took a deep breath. "Okay, here goes." He slowly pushed his P-90 into the field and watched it glow blue around the gun. "Weird!" Mentally crossing his fingers, he pushed his right hand forward into the field. "Yeah, it's kinda hurting my hands a little."
That was all Rodney had to hear. "Okay, so get out of there."
John tried to pull his hand back, then tried again. "I'm trying to, but it's pulling me in."
Ronon grabbed the back of John's vest and braced his feet. "I got you." He was not letting his taskmaster get sucked into some weird vortex, especially after the scene he'd caused yesterday.
"Okay, come on, get me out of here." Ronon had a grip of steel, and John was still being pulled forward.
Teyla latched herself on and Ronon was glad for the help. "I'm tryin'."
"Well, try harder." Okay, now his hand was really hurting.
Damn it, why hadn't John warned him? Or maybe this hadn't happened to him? Rodney vaguely remembered John talking to him when he'd come in at dawn, talking about how he'd already changed things. "No, no, no, we proved this – it shouldn't be happening!"
Why did everything in this galaxy want to kill him? "Well, it is! It's pulling me in!"
Teyla could see they were losing ground to the doorway. "It's too strong!"
John's face was centimeters from the barrier. He turned and gave his team a panicked look and Rodney knew he couldn't let them keep trying. "Don't touch the barrier!"
It was a command, and Teyla and Ronon obeyed because while Teyla and Rodney were technically equal in the hierarchy, Rodney was John's second in all the ways that mattered. That didn't mean Ronon was happy about it. "Why did you tell us to let him go?"
This wasn't happening. Any minute he was going to wake up and this was all going to be a dream. No, no Rodney knew it wasn't a dream. This was happening, but for some reason that naked bastard in his bed hadn't said a word! "Because you weren't going to stop and the last thing we need is both of you getting pulled in with him."
"Why would the Ancestors create something that would do this?" Teyla had learned, in two years with the humans, that while their Ancestors were not as pure as snow, even their darkest actions had a purpose. Even the nanovirus was a weapon, to deprive the Wraith of food. It was a cruel and bitter thing, but it had a point.
"I don't know." Okay, he had to think. He was Rodney McKay, and when he wasn't destroying planets he was brilliant.
"Figure it out or you're going in after him!" Ronon wasn't leaving John on the other side of what ever that thing was.
"OK, that is not helping! Obviously the portal reacts..." Rodney trailed off. Go with him. That's what John had said, go with him. He grabbed the camera and stared at the image. The memory card was full. Time dilation, it had to be, and he had to go. Now. "Give me your knapsacks and empty your pockets – everything you think he might need to survive."
"Wh-"
Rodney cut Teyla off. "It is a time dilation field, which means that time is passing much faster on the other side of the portal than it is here for us. Tell Zelenka that. He'll figure the rest out."
"Where are you going?" If Rodney was going back to the jumper, she would accompany him, but that wasn't what he had in mind. Teyla could see that gleam in his eyes.
"Every moment we stand here debating this, literally hours could be going by for Colonel Sheppard relative to us." Rodney had discovered, upon opening his knapsack, that his guest had repacked it. It was full of food. He pitched it through the portal. "Teyla, go back to the Puddlejumper and radio Atlantis. Tell them what's going on, then bring back anything you think we can use. Emergency rations, medical kit. Anything you can think of. Get extra batteries for the camcorder. Press Record, shove it through and hold for three seconds. No more, no less. It'll give Zelenka what he needs to figure out the exact dilation."
"You're actually going through?" Ronon hadn't meant it. If anyone was going, it should be him.
Rodney ignored him, and kept talking. He was good at that. "If we're still there, that should give us plenty of time to record a detailed message." If he hurried, if he talked very fast, maybe only a few hours or days would go by.
Teyla didn't like the sound of that. "What do you mean if you are still there?"
"Look, depending on the compression ratio inside the field, there's a very good chance we may have used up the supplies we've sent through by the time you get back. I know it's hard to get your head around, but what it means is we have to …"
She understood. She was no fool. "It means we must hurry."
"Right. Go-go-go-go-go-go-go." Rodney watched her go, then turned his attention to Ronon. "Don't follow. Wait for Teyla. Zelenka will figure it out. Do you understand?"
"I understand."
"Do not follow, Ronon." And then Rodney walked through the field and didn't look back.
-----
Elizabeth was going to kill him. "What is the matter with you?" She was almost screaming, she knew it. Only Rodney and John did this to her.
John turned slowly. "They're in, I take it?"
"Oh, you bet they're in. And you're going to get them out! Now."
"We can't get them out now. We have to wait for," John glanced at his watch. "Another two and a half hours. We should go through the doorway at 5:17 PM."
Elizabeth just knew that with two John Sheppards kicking around she was going to have a stroke or a heart attack. "Talk quickly."
"You'll want Carson. And Zelenka, if you can get him in the jumper."
-----
"Well, it's about time." John was sitting against the wall of the cave, looking irritated. "What took you so long?"
"I hate to tell you this, John, but it's just been a couple minutes out there."
"My life has become a bad sci-fi movie." John looked absolutely miserable. "By my watch, I've been here thirty three hours."
Okay, this was bad. Time was flying in here. It had been, at most, three minutes since John had been dragged through the field. That meant that a minute was roughly equal to eleven hours. "I've got good news and bad news."
"Good news first." John took a swig from one of the canteens that had shown up last night, then offered it to Rodney, who shook his head.
"The good news is the other John seems to know exactly what's going on. He told me to follow you."
"Let's hear it for my evil twin." He trusted the evil twin in two areas: He wouldn't hurt Rodney, and he wouldn't hurt Atlantis. This involved Rodney, so John would give him the benefit of the doubt.
"The bad news is," Rodney dropped to the ground beside John. "We aren't going to able to wait for them here. Rescue is going to be a long time in coming. The time dilation is five seconds out there for every minute in here."
Okay, so maybe he couldn't trust his evil twin to protect Rodney. "He just let you follow me in?"
"He told me to follow you." Rodney unwrapped a power bar. "Whatever is supposed to happen in here, it has to happen."
-----
They'd been there three months when Rodney crawled into his bed in the middle of the night. "You know the worst part of this? The waiting. He sent me in after you because... because I didn't let anyone follow you the first time. This is some kind of passive-aggressive revenge, ten years after the fact."
"It's not passive-aggressive. I don't do passive-aggressive." John scooted back against Rodney, figuring, what the hell? Help was still weeks away, even in the best scenario Rodney had come up with. "This is the special hell, Rodney. I'm not good at waiting. At least you're never boring."
"And every woman we meet falls madly in love with you. For two people as unbalanced as we are, we're remarkably consistent." Rodney stared at the back of John's head. It was blocking his view of the wall, or he would have stared at that. "I should explain why I was sleeping with him."
"I don't want to hear this, Rodney."
"Too bad." Rodney took John's right hand in his and started rubbing his fingers. Rodney only had the future John's ability to type as guarantee that there was no serious permanent damage. "He came into my room and threw me against the wall. I'm usually more of a convenient fuck than the true object of someone's affections. He really wanted me, and I don't understand why."
"Rodney, come on. Have a heart." He didn't want to get into this. They're not the kind of men that have best friends, but that's what they are. They weren't the kind of men who should get involved, but they'd gotten involved in the past, and, if you believe the future is already written, then they would be again.
"That, and he told me if I wouldn't comfort a dying man he'd go to Ronon." Rodney poked John in the ribs. "I always knew you had the hots for him."
"Please. Everyone has the hots for Ronon." Half of Atlantis, and that included Elizabeth, was just waiting for some sort of orgy-inducing spore to invade Atlantis so they could bag Ronon.
"They were lovers for ten years. I can't imagine you keeping me around that long just for terrific sex." Rodney had had relationships with what he considered terrific sex that didn't last ten weeks, so he knew that wasn't how the other John had dealt with Rodney's admittedly acidic personality.
"Hate to tell you this, buddy, but you weren't exactly the best I ever had."
"I'm not the one who had an alarming tenancy to fall asleep in the middle." John's fingers felt like ice. Rodney was sure some of the smaller blood vessels had been damaged. He'd probably have poor circulation for the rest of his life in this hand. "I'm not asking for some grand confession. I wouldn't know what to say even if I got one. Just admit it was something."
"It was something." John ran his hand up Rodney's thigh. "The worst part of this is, I asked him. I actually asked him why he wasn't in the Air Force anymore, and if he'd said to me, 'They kicked me out because I was sleeping with Rodney', I'd still be lying here in bed with you, thinking of what I want to do with you."
"I'm just irresistible like that." There was just a touch of false bravado in Rodney's words, but he licked at John's neck and gently bit his earlobe.
"And for your information, the reason I kept falling asleep was the fact that between losing the ZPM and pretending to blow up the city, the command staff as a whole got about twenty minutes of sleep." John sat up and shucked off his tunic. "Can we have sex now?"
Rodney chuckled. "The best thing is, as far as I can tell, you never change."
-----
When they got back, he let Rodney have the first bath and went back to the cabin to wait for him. Teer was already there. "You've been gone over a day."
"Rodney and I went out to the portal. There were supplies there. The jumper's back from Atlantis. It won't be long now." John opened one of the knapsacks, eager to see something processed, wrapped up in foil and full of refined sugar.
"There are people here who care for you." He could have been killed by the Beast, and who but her would ever know?
"Sorry, we should've told somebody."
"I knew." John Sheppard was not the man she had always expected. He and his companion hated it here, and wished only to leave. How could either of them possibly help?
"Is that some special power of yours you haven't told me about?" John had seen stranger things.
"Yes." He was thick headed, and his hair never lay flat! What a fool she'd been her entire life, pining for this man.
"Oh."
"As Hedda has the power to heal, I am able to see images in my mind. It's not uncommon for those on the path to ascension to gain such abilities." He was in love with the obnoxious man, even if he didn't know it yet. The future reshaped itself before her eyes. This was an altered time she lived. Something had changed. Still, John was the One. He had to be. "I was the one who sent Avrid to find you."
"You did?" Why did everyone around him seem to know the future and try and shape it to their will?
"Because I knew you were coming that night, and I knew where you would be in the field; and I have known since I was a child that you would sit here with me as you do now. I've been able to close my eyes and see your face my entire life, John. You are the one." John was staring at her wide-eyed and Teer knew she'd given a good speech.
"The one what?" No, no. No more alien maidens. He'd promised Rodney.
"The one who will lead us to ascension." She had, at one time, hoped for more than that, but once the other had entered the picture, she'd given up that hope.
"Oh." Thank god that was all. "I was a little worried there for a minute."
In her visions, this was to be the night. Now, her chastity seemed silly. "Time flows differently now. Not in it's speed, but in it's content. You were to come alone, John Sheppard. You were to come alone and be with me, but now that future is gone. Still, in the coming days, once you have defeated the Beast, we will ascend together – all of us."
"You mean all of you."
There was no chance of convincing this man to join them in Ascension. There was too much tying him to the world. "Yes, of course. You will defeat the Beast and we shall ascend."
"I don't know how that's gonna happen, Teer. I really don't. Look, I've been up against that thing twice. I don't see how a third time's gonna turn out any different.
Teer smiled at him, and it was a sad smile. Her entire life for this moment, and a split second decision changed it all. "You don't have to know how. You just have to trust that it will." She pressed a kiss to his forehead and left him alone to wait for his companion.
-----
In six months, they'd both acquired a lot of stuff, those day to day things that turned up in medieval life. So, John found himself, that first night back, trying to figure out what to do with his set of wooden plates, his pewter cup, or the five sets of clothing made from all natural fibers with no buttons or elastic. If all else failed, on his next trip to Earth, he'd make a Sunday visit to the gym at his alma mater. There was always one or two Scadians hanging out, in full armor, and none of them would turn down free equipment.
"I know what you're thinking."
John dropped the cup on his foot and muttered a curse in Arabic. "Aren't you dead yet?"
"You've only been gone three hours. I'm not even insane yet." His evil twin was leaning in the doorway to the bathroom and, while he was still alive, he was looking decidedly green. "Did you have a nice vacation?"
"If you call getting my ass handing to me every three months by a creature composed of the fear of a nearly-Ascended population a vacation, then yeah, I guess." According to Carson, both he and Rodney were in better condition than when they left. Their blood pressure and cholesterol had improved and they'd gotten a much needed chance to catch up on almost two years of lost sleep. "What are you doing here, anyway?"
"I was throwing up in your bathroom." John walked, somewhat unsteadily, and took a seat at the desk. "I'm assuming you've reclaimed our favorite astrophysicist and I should keep my shaky hands to myself?"
"I'd appreciate it." John, for the time being, shoved the clothing into the bottom drawer of his dresser.
"For once in our life, don't be a dick. Don't run away." John rested his chin on the back of the desk chair. "Bad days are coming. Rodney may think of himself as Oppenheimer but Carson is well on his way to being Doctor Moreau."
John grabbed a disposable razor and ducked into the bathroom. "Come on, Carson? The man's worst crime, to date, is not keeping his experimental drugs out of reach."
"You just go on thinking that." The elder John rubbed at his wrist, wishing the ache would just go away. Topamax for the spasms, hydrocodone for the pain and his hand was still convinced it was about a day older than the rest of him. Not a big deal, normally. When he was younger, it had just meant poor circulation. Now, days from death, it was a big deal. "I'd like you to take Rodney off your team, at least until I'm dead. There are parts of the city I'd like to show him, useful things."
"I'm not his keeper." John considered the beard, then his razor, and sighed. This was going to hurt. "Actually, I am, now that I think about it – but that doesn't mean he listens to me. You'll have to ask him yourself, but I don't think he's gonna go for it."
"I'll convince him. Somehow." He needed to keep Rodney here in the city, and he'd find a way, no matter what.
-----
Someone was throwing up. Lorne cautiously opened the door to the stall. "Colonel?" No, it wasn't the Colonel. "Doctor Sheppard? Should I call Beckett?"
"M'okay, mostly." And if Nick believed that, John had a bridge in Brooklyn that he was trying to sell. "Give me a hand, would you? I need to get some meds."
"Sure." He pulled John to his feet. The rumor mill had gone crazy. Another dying time-traveler was in their midst. He'd given Miko tea, done something to the water system so they had virtually unlimited hot water, and his constant companion was a red-hot blond hologram that was in love with Doctor Z. "Sir-"
"I'm a civilian, Nick. You should call me John." He had to lean more than a little on Nick as they walked towards the transporter.
"John, then. Why did you select me for this mission?"
"You're a good soldier."
"That's not why." He'd been a good soldier on Earth, but it hadn't given him a gate team of his own, let alone the 2IC position. That had been Carter's, or Jackson's, depending on the General's mood that week. "When you told me that my team was going to have a botanist as our scientist, you knew I'd pick David Parrish."
"I wasn't sure." Nick's record was squeaky clean, but he wasn't a rising star, despite his capabilities. John suspected that had been O'Neill's doing, to protect him.
"He says thank you for the fish, sir." They stepped into the transporter, and then, after a brief moment of time in which they existed only as particles they were standing near the infirmary.
"Tell him he's welcome." John's legs gave out just outside the door.
-----
"We'll increase the Baclofen, and I'll give you something stronger for the pain." Oxycontin, maybe. John wouldn't live long enough to get addicted, and Carson was willing, at this point, to let John die however he wanted.
It hurt to breath. "Ananke, how much longer?"
"Perhaps two days, if you stay in bed. Approximately 30 years if you were to interface with Atlantis." Ananke had appeared just as they were getting John into a bed, and had proceeded to scare the hell out of the nursing staff. "This is foolish, John. Rejoin with us, and we can save you."
It only took Carson a minute to realize what the hologram was implying. "For Christ'sake, John, why didn't ye tell me this a week ago? We-"
"We do that, and the city will never accept your Sheppard." John gave Ananke a look that could kill, then swallowed his pills dry. "I came here to save the only things that matter, Carson. This isn't my world. I don't want to live here."
"You can't mean that. This is your life-"
"No, it's his life. I have a right to die, Carson. Besides," John took Ananke's hand and his next comment seemed to be directed to her as well. "What would the universe do with two John Sheppards?"
"I..." Carson was a geneticist because it gave him a chance to affect medicine on an epic scale. He'd never been so great with the face-to-face interactions with his patients. "I'll abide by your wishes, John."
"Good, because I need to be able to trust you. I want to be cremated." John patted the hologram's hand as he said it. "We scattered Rodney's ashes in the park by our apartment. I know that was in an alternate time line, but that's still where I'd like to be laid to rest. I love Atlantis, Carson, and she loves me, in her own way, but scatter my ashes in Ueno Park."
"Of course, John." Wherever Ueno Park was, Carson would make sure that was where John ended up.
"Thank you. And now," John got shakily to his feet. "For my great escape."
-----
There was no answer when she knocked, but the door slid open and Elizabeth could see into Doctor Sheppard's darkened room. The AI was in bed with John, curled right up next to him. Elizabeth had seen a lot of strange things over the past two years, but this took the cake. "Ananke?"
"Please, keep your voice down. He is asleep." She slid from his arms and out of bed and joined Elizabeth in the hallway. "What can I do for you, Doctor Weir?"
"I came to talk to John, but I'd really like to know what I just saw in there." Elizabeth knew John considered himself incapable of close personal relationships, but this was crazy.
"John Sheppard is this city's last son. We do not want him to die. Watching him in pain is difficult for us. He sleeps better with someone beside him." Ananke looked at the door and it slid shut. "We love him, but the love for him is simpler than mine for Radek. I do not feel compelled to terminate when he dies."
"You want to stay?" The AI was a testament to Radek's work, but she was lovesick and seemed to upset the Czech. Elizabeth wasn't sure she had the right to ask him to work with the hologram on a day-to-day basis.
"If you'll allow it. The city, once she can see non-ATA personnel, is more responsive and welcoming to them. I also function as a search engine and translator for the Alterran database." Ananke dangled the offer of translations, knowing there was no way Elizabeth could refuse her. "I would be willing to undergo a programming overhaul if you truly believe my presence will hurt Radek. That's the last thing I want to do."
John was always bringing home strays. Elizabeth supposed this was no different. "Of course you can stay."
"Thank you, Elizabeth." Ananke gave her a smile, the smile Elizabeth heard Radek mumur about in Czech, his dead wife's smile, then walked back into the room, the door sliding shut behind her. "Are you awake, John?"
"I'm awake."
He was curled in fetal position, his eyes tightly shut. She lay down beside him again. "You shouldn't be. Tomorrow is..."
"Tomorrow is the day we lose you." John looped his arms behind her neck and let his head rest on her chest. "Ananke. You know I love Atlantis, that I'd do anything for you. You know that, right?"
"Of course, John." The city had seen far too many of the humans die under her watch, but watching John slip away was the hardest. "You came back to us and joined with us, even at great risk to yourself. What's happening to you is our fault."
"And what happened to you was mine. You died because we left you. We tried to forget you and move on with our life. I can't be responsible for your destruction again. "
"You won't." Ananke, and by extension the City, knew John loved them the most.
"Then you understand why I have to do this." And then John unclasped the necklace that she wore her power crystal on, cutting off her recharge cycle.
"John-" She started to flicker almost immediately and pulled away from him. "What have you done?"
"What I have to." John slid the crystal into his pocket. "I love you, but I can be happy without you. You can't live without me."
He'd already lost his mind and no one had noticed. The degeneration was farther along than she'd thought. "John, you have already stopped it! We will not die. You will not have to watch us sink. There's no more you can do!"
"There is. I can stop Rodney from walking through that wormhole." He gave her a peck on the cheek right before she lost cohesion. "No matter what the cost."
-----
John opened the door to find himself standing there, holding two mugs of coffee. "Sorta risky, isn't it? Spending the night, I mean?"
"The Daedalus isn't due in for an hour, and my second-in-command is sleeping with a male botanist. Give me a little credit."
John knew why the other man was here. "We're leaving in ten minutes. They have a ZPM. You're not going to be able to convince him to stay."
"I can try." His evil twin gave him a mug. "I'll call if I convince him to stay."
"If you convince Rodney to stay here while there's a ZPM just waiting for him on P4M-327, you deserve Elizabeth's diplomacy degree." John took a long drag of coffee and made a contented noise. "But this will go a long way."
"Shoo. At least give me a chance." He pushed his younger self out the door and sat down on the bed. He heard the shower cut off.
"If Ronon makes another comment about my smell, I'll... What are you doing here?" Rodney stopped in his tracks, naked except for the towel he was using to dry his hair. "You are not the John I'm looking for."
"Stay with me. Just for today." John's hands shook a little, but he didn't let the cup drop. "Tomorrow I'll be dead, and you and him can live happily ever after. Or if not happily, then at least you'll have a better after than the one we had. Just don't go. Please."
Rodney took the cup from John's hands and set it down on the desk. He didn't bother to put on a towel, he just wrapped his arms around the other man. He could feel the tremors that Carson said would accompany brain death. "I can't."
"I promise you, Rodney, they'll bring back the ZPM. With or without you." He could smell Rodney's shampoo and inhaled deeply.
"Not that. I can't watch you die." He'd seen John do so many stupid things, so many things that should have killed him, but to watch him die like this? To watch him die in inches, as his brain atrophied and his organs failed? Rodney couldn't do it. He was still too much of a coward. He wiped the tears off John's face. "Did you love me?"
"Enough to do this for you." John reached one arm back and picked up the cup and pushed it into Rodney's hands.
Rodney drank half the mug at the first sip. "Ten years, and you still don't know I take my coffee black?" He knew this was no time for humor, but he couldn't help it. God, he was horrible with death.
"Oh, I remembered. I had to use the sugar to cover up the citric acid." John's face had gone blank, but he was still holding on.
"Citric... You put citrus in my coffee?" Rodney let the cup fall from his fingers. He wouldn't be dramatic like Radek and throw it at the wall. "Why?" He must have used a lot. His throat was already starting to close up.
John took Rodney's ear piece out and crushed it under his heel. "I love you, Rodney. As much as I love flying. I love you more than my commission, more than the ships I designed in Tokyo. I love you enough to tear down the walls of time, but I don't love you enough to kill Atlantis. I'd rather give up the life we had together than see her sink into the ocean again. I can't let you go to P4M-327." John stepped back and Rodney sank to the floor in a controlled sort of fall. He knelt down beside Rodney, pressed something into his hand, and walked away.
Once he'd gotten far enough away, he called John and told him that Rodney wasn't going on today's mission. His younger self trusted him with Rodney. His younger self was a fool.
End of Part Three
