author's note: Due to personal, IRL stuff, I won't be updating weekly for the foreseeable future. I don't want to put this on hiatus, though, so I'm gonna do my best to just upload on the Fridays that I can3

The song for this chapter is Do You Go Up by Khai!


Sunday, Apr. 18

"I've got a final in the morning and I want to die."

Bubbles looked over at her sister and nodded solemnly. "I hate this time of year, truly."

"This amount of stress isn't normal," Buttercup groaned. "Speaking of which, how are you holding up? You look like shit, sis, and that's not normal."

The blonde snorted and rolled her eyes. She knew that for the first time in her life, there were bags beginning to form under her eyes- and she really didn't appreciate her sister pointing it out. "Gee, thanks."

Buttercup raised a brow at her.

The blue Puff raised one right back at her.

"Butch asked me to talk to you," she stated plainly. They both knew the accusation for what it was- Butch never asked for help unless he absolutely had to. Her arms then crossed over her chest. "What's going on?"

"That little toad," she grumbled. It was a grumble to cover the guilt sinking in her gut. If she'd worried him enough that he'd completely bypassed her to talk to her sister

Open communication needs to exist.

Bubbles felt her shoulders sag heavily, her eyes casting away from the green flying alongside her. The gentle wind on her skin did nothing to soothe the upset coursing through her in that moment- upset that she brought upon herself. She raised her hands to rub down her face. "I'm bad at handling stress, apparently."

"We've all known that for years," Buttercup said, her voice surprisingly soft. "Talk it out. Start easy, build with me. Your finals are stressing you out. So is this new grooming class you decided to take in the middle of Finals Season."

She laughed dryly. "I'm stressed about finally telling dad and Blossie that I'm not becoming a vet after all this schooling."

Buttercup blinked. It was the first she'd heard of it, either- but the sudden class made much more sense now. They'd all figured it was a recommendation from someone at the clinic, but in retrospect, with just how torn up the blonde was over her second ever surgery, it made a lot more sense for her to redirect course. The youngest felt a new level of respect for the middle sister, taking on a completely new profession just as her schooling was finishing up.

In the middle of the most stressful time of her life.

"You stuck the schooling out, though," she responded, a knowing smile on her face. "They'll be proud as hell that you stuck it out even though you're not gonna do it. They'll be even prouder that you found a way to stick the landing like this, too."

"You really think so…?"

"I know so. I know I am."

As expected, the blonde flew over to her younger (but taller) sister and embraced her tightly.

She patted her blonde hair lovingly. With an arm kept around her waist, Buttercup kept them moving side-by-side along their new patrol route. "What else is there, 'cause we both know that ain't all of it."

Bubbles sighed through her nose. "Moving is stressful. No matter how much time or how simple it's gonna be, dealing with that also sucks right now," she admitted. She knew Butch was keeping a tight lip about their move after graduation for now. He wanted to wait until the house could actually be used to even tell the others about it, and since it was his house, she wouldn't spoil that for him.

But knowing there was essentially an entire month where she wouldn't have much access to the things she packed away added to the stress significantly. She couldn't just haphazardly put things in random boxes to be immediately taken out at Butch's apartment- they'd be taken to the house in the mountains. They'd eventually get to unboxing things once he finished up laying the flooring, but that was still at least a month away.

The black haired woman gave her all the time she needed to find her next few words.

They were much harder to get out.

"I… I'm also just kinda… Struggling with old depression a little bit," she admitted in a quieter whisper. Mental health wasn't something they often talked about, and the subject felt a bit taboo. After all, she was a super with powers normal people didn't have, and here she was talking about depression. She was blessed in ways normal people weren't, and here she was complaining about it. While she knew it was important, she also felt a bit selfish to be talking about it when others have it so, so much worse. "…Or a lot."

Buttercup's arm tightened around the shorter woman. "If you want to talk about it, I've got an ear open and all night to be your lazy therapist," she offered with a smile.

Bubbles shook her head a little. "Thank you, BC… But, I don't… I don't even know where to start unpacking things myself, let alone how to start talking about it."

"Start anywhere," she responded simply, her tone much more understanding than the almost flippant words seemed. "It doesn't have to make sense. Tug at the ropes until you find a good starting spot. Then we can work on unraveling and untying it."

Her blue eyes cast to the sky- to the moon as it occasionally peeked out from behind the clouds. Tears gathered in her eyes and she inhaled deeply. "Boomie's situation fucked me up," she laughed sardonically, not in the least bit ashamed of her cursing. "I didn't think… I didn't think too highly of myself for a long time and I compromised a lot of my feelings so I didn't have to deal with them back in high school."

Buttercup seemed a little confused- but the blonde didn't blame her for being so. Still, she probed further. "Did- or do- you still love him?"

"Not like that, no," she said easily. "He's like the twin brother I never had."

She nodded slowly. "Then why did it fuck you up so much?"

Bubbles seemed so lost in that moment. Her blue eyes seemed endlessly confused, unsure and completely out of her zone. "…Because we do have souls like they do."

Lime eyes sized her up though she paid it no mind. Like some weird blindfold had been taken off, she could see her sister in a new light. It'd been said that, in high school, Bubbles was more emotionally mature than she or Blossom were- and in that moment, she saw why they'd thought as much. The blonde had seen the details of the world the other two Puffs didn't want to pay attention to. The details that they remained blissfully ignorant to the entire time. That didn't necessarily constitute emotional maturity, but the fact that she dealt with it so much sooner probably meant something.

They knew she was depressed but she hid it well and knew just how to talk her way around talking about whatever was on her mind. It wasn't for lack of trying to help her. She, in a way, helped continue to keep their blissful ignorance to thoughts like these.

Well, at least until they were in college and they had these thoughts on their own, anyway.

Bubbles thought of it years before they did- at a much younger age.

It both strengthened her and scarred her, and the scarring was much more visible now.

Buttercup just rubbed her sister's back as they floated above the green and flowering trees, not really knowing what else to offer. "Reassuring and scary," she said softly, voicing a short bit of her own opinion on it. "I won't act like I know what's on your mind, but I see where you're coming from."

Bubbles squeezed her sister just a bit tighter. "It sucks," she whispered. "I didn't like myself at all and just… I can't measure up to all that…"

Black brows furrowed in concern and confusion. "What do you mean by that? You can't measure up? To what?"

Her blue eyes filled with tears but neither woman was sure if they were going to fall or not. "We're not stupid nor are we blind, BC. For years , the public saw me as the pretty face- the spokeswoman and the soft heart of the Powerpuff Girls. Blossom's the leader, the brains of our group. You're the strong one, the one known to completely fuck someone up. What was I to the people of Townsville, exactly? The pretty face to smile for the cameras, the too sweet to fight one? Even now, a lot of them still think that way. That I don't contribute that much to our team…"

"Fuck 'em."

"It's easy to say that now," she nodded slowly. It didn't stop it from stinging like a mother fucker, though. "It was harder to say in high school. I was the small one, the pretty face. I was the soft one, they'd say," she scoffed, "trying not to offend me just because I wasn't lean or built like Blossie and you are… You guys all treated me like I was weaker, too, and that didn't help anything."

The green Puff just nodded, her apology having already been said months before this moment, but her guilt stayed in her eyes.

"I couldn't measure up to you or to Blossie," she said in a breaking voice, "I couldn't measure up to be a Puff, I couldn't measure up to normal people's standards because I'm not normal, I couldn't measure up to anyone's expectations and it hurt . It was… It was easier to blame that we weren't born." It was an admission that burned her throat as though the words themselves were laced with acid. "It was easier to think that our souls were different from theirs - if we had them at all. I wasn't human, so I wasn't expected to measure up to those standards. I didn't like myself and it was easier to work around that than confront it directly."

The dark haired woman hadn't realized just how badly it had affected her. "…You don't feel that way now, do you?"

Bubbles' lips flattened to a thin line as she gave it genuine thought. "I… I don't know. I didn't feel that way before this whole thing. I thought… I thought I'd healed from that, but I didn't really deal with those feelings well… I don't know if I feel that strongly still, but I know that it feels really fucking raw again." She tried to pull away from her sister, but Buttercup kept her stuck to her side. She didn't try to pull back again after that. "I know that I'm mostly just terrified of getting that low again."

Her sister nodded slowly. That was something she could latch onto. Something she knew they could do. "Well, we'll do our best to help keep you up."

"I don't want to put you guys out-"

"Oh stop, you're my sister . We both know I'm the more stubborn one and I want to help you because I care about you. Besides, you would do the same for me." She leaned over and kissed the blonde's forehead- and Bubbles felt those tears threatening to fall. "Stressed out or not, we're all here for each other, right?"

"Right," Bubbles agreed softly. "Sorry, it's… Hard."

"I can't say I completely get it, but I can imagine," Buttercup replied. She'd always do her best to understand, especially in times like this. "You're worth a lot more than you've ever given yourself credit for… And I'm sorry I didn't say that sooner."

"Thank you," she whispered. She then inhaled slowly. "I feel like garbage, though."

"You like garbage for some reason," she scoffed light heartedly, teasing the blonde's currently absent boyfriend. It was clear just from how well they knew one another that Bubbles was done talking for the night, especially with the way she pursed her lips after she spoke. So, she'd change the subject to keep her sister as far out of those dark thoughts as she could. "You aren't, though. I don't think he'll rub off on you that much."

It got a snort from the shorter lass. "You're awful. He's not garbage."

"He can handle it," she waved off. "And he's absolutely garbage."

"Hot garbage," the blonde countered.

Buttercup laughed and shook her head. "If that's what you want to think."

"You can't deny how attractive he is though," Bubbles pressed.

"Eh… He's not half bad on the eyes, sure," she conceded. "But if he finds out I said that, I'm putting gangreen green dye in your shampoo."

Her blue eyes narrowed. "You wouldn't."

"I would."

Bubbles then shrugged, startling her sister. "I bet Butch would like it if my hair was dyed green."

Buttercup made a fake gagging sound. "Gross."

The blonde rested her head against her sister's shoulder. "Thank you, 'Cup."

She hummed back and, again, patted her blonde hair. "Of course. You know I'm just a call away, yeah?"

"I know," she smiled.

"Good. Now let Green Bean know the world isn't ending on him," she chuckled. "He can stop being dramatic now."

Bubbles giggled and nodded, her heart incredibly full at the thought of her boyfriend choking down his pride to ask his own counterpart to talk to her. As guilty as she felt about worrying him, she felt just as warm to know he cared so much.

"He's the best."

Buttercup rolled her eyes… But at that moment, she couldn't argue. He might not have been the best for her, personally, but Buttercup couldn't argue how perfect her counterpart seemed for her blonde sister.

…Not that she'd admit that.

"…It's debatable." The black haired woman looked around their finishing point, double checking the area with her x-ray vision. Once she was certain it was all normal woodland creatures around them, she patted her sister's shoulder. "Be safe getting home."

"You too, BC." Then, in a streak of lime, she took off. "I love you!" she shouted after the toughest Puff.

"I love you too!"

Bubbles smiled widely to herself and the blonde found herself rushing back to Butch's apartment, aqua blue following her as she flew through the dark, cloudy night sky. It was on the cusp of raining- again - and the blonde was now just trying to beat the rain. She did very well not to cry, and did even better considering she was able to open up a little. As hopeless as it felt, she couldn't deny feeling just a little bit lighter. Her heart felt just a little bit brighter.

As she flew, she counted herself lucky to have such amazing sisters- and such an amazing boyfriend.

The door to his apartment flung itself open before her feet even touched the ground, and by the time her feet did touch the ground, her boyfriend's arms were wrapped tightly around her midsection. She leaned into the embrace, her arms wrapping around his strong waist and clutching at the back of his shirt. He didn't hesitate to bury his face against the crown of her head.

Her voice was a whisper when she spoke. "I'm sorry for clamming up…"

"It's okay," he whispered back, his large hand rubbing soothing circles on her back. "I'm just glad you're willing to talk to someone."

She hummed, guilt gnawing at her gut. "It should have been you, though-"

"You're still not used to the relationship thing, I get that." He pulled back only enough to hold her chin between his thumb and forefinger. "Sometimes unexpected things happen when we least want them to… We'll get through it."

She smiled softly at him, her eyes tearing up again. "Um… Can we go inside…?"

"I have a bath ready for you," he nodded and kissed her temple.

Bubbles felt her heart twist painfully. He was too good to her and it made her heart twist and burn at the same time. Her words bubbled up before she could stop them. "I am… So scared of falling to that dark place again," she admitted plainly, her voice choked up. "I just don't know how to stop it… I really didn't mean to go quiet-"

He kissed her forehead. "Angel, do you trust me?"

"With my life," she immediately responded.

Even now, caught in a web of feelings she still didn't fully untangle, she had no hesitation.

Butch moved his hand from her chin to caress her jaw. She leaned into his touch eagerly and his eyes softened. "Tell me what you need, then. No matter when or what it is. If it's someone else, if it's just a talk… Just tell me what you need and trust I'll do what I can to get it done."

Her mouth wobbled a little as the tears threatened to fall- but she kept them back. "What if I don't know what I need…?"

"We'll figure it out together, then," he answered easily. As though it were the simplest thing in the world- and to him, it was.

She nodded and tucked herself against his chest, willing the rest of the world to fade into oblivion. "I think, right now, I need that bath."