Disclaimer

I do not own Holes.

The whole camp sat outside of the Library waiting for Mr. Sir or Mr. Pendanski or even the Warden, but only Ms. Gene showed up. She, of course, did not hand out shovels as that she did not want to "mess up the procedure" of giving out shovels. The interns sat near the showers slumped over and holding their noses. Someone had set off a stink bomb in the wreck room the night before, and it smelled horrible. The interns wanted to both stay away from the smell, and from the irate Ms. Gene, who somehow had not found them though she had asked almost everyone in the camp where they were.

"Maybe it was not best to give Gina a stink bomb?" Juliana asked slightly.

Each of the interns nodded and sighed.

"We are going home soon," Giorgio smiled, looking to Glenn, who lied on the ground.

Each of the interns nodded and sighed.

"I broke up with Armpit," Trixie gave a big sigh, then scrunched up her face with disgust after getting a big breath of the stagnant stink bomb air.

Each of the interns nodded and sighed.

"Wait, you did what?" Greg turned to Trixie, just realizing what she had said.

Each of the interns nodded and sighed.

"Stop that! I didn't say anything to nod to!" Greg yelped.

"Sorry, it started to become a habit. It felt wrong not doing it," Adrienne gave an apologetic smile.

"Yeah, I broke up with Armpit. We wanted different things in the relationship," Trixie nodded matter-of-fact-ly.

"You wanted different things?" Alice raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah! He liked to talk all meaningful like all the time. I know it doesn't seem like it, but he really was a sweetheart. But still! Why would I want to fucking talk all the time? I like to make out and shit! I am just not the type of girl that wants to talk about fucking life and relationships," Trixie cringed.

"Life? And relationships?"

"Yeah! Who mother fucking does that? A pussy?"

"You know, Trix, you were in a relationship with Armpit. Maybe he thought that was what you did," Juliana suggested.

"Shut up, Juliana," Trixie spat.

"Zig and I talk. But we also make out. So, I guess I have a happy medium, huh?" Tap smiled.

"Shut up, Tap," Trixie spat once more.

"THERE YOU ARE! THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED!" Gina yelped from behind a crowd of people.

"Scatter!" the interns all shouted and scrambled into different directions.


Juliana hid behind the showers and ran her hand through her hair. Wow, that was close.

"Juliana?" a familiar male voice ventured.

She turned with a sigh, "I didn't do it." She froze when she saw it was Magnet who had spoken to her. "Oh, hi Magnet."

"Look, I'm sorry that I was acting creepy, as you said it. But I do really like you. And I am sorry."

"For liking me? You don't have to be sorry for that. It is actually quite flattering."

"No, for…"

"You don't have to explain. Magnet, I like you too."

"You do?" He smiled.

"Yes, but…"

"But?"

"But I do not think it would work. I uh… I am a different person than you think I am."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I uh… well, I can't exactly tell you that, but let's just say that I may or may not have done anything to get here."

"Why would you be here if you did not do anything?"

"Because, you know, um… it's hard to explain."

"Implore me."

"Where do you get these words? I really did not think you were very smart!"

"Juliana."

"I'm sorry. I can't."

"I do not care if you are a different person! I love you anyway!"

"Okay, I still think that it is weird that you love me. Like me is okay, love me is… yeah, weird."

"I'm sorry. I like you then."

"I could have never guessed."


Greg and Trixie hid inside a hole that was not riddled with lizards and sighed collectively. Wow, that was close.

"GregIhavesomethingtoconfesstoyou," Trixie started, speaking fast and barely able to understand.

Greg sat that for a moment, trying to comprehend what had just been said, and then shook his head, "What?"

"Iloveyou."

"I still can't understand you."

"WHATDOYOUMEANYOUCAN'TFUCKINGUNDERSTANDMEI'MFUCKINGBLEEDINGMYHEARTOUTHERE!"

"Dude, Trixie, slow it down a bit. Enunciate."

Trixie's eye twitched uncontrollably, her anger rising inside of her. She balled her fists, took one hard look at Greg, and kissed him without another incomprehensible word.


Adrienne picked her fingernails in the wreck room, plainly minding her own business and thinking about what she was going to do without Cecil. She glanced at the door at times to make sure Gina wasn't coming. Wow, that was close.

"What am I going to do?" Adrienne said out loud, contemplating her options.

"Hey, Brazen?" Squid's voice rang out through the quiet room.

"Hey, what?" she answered, wondering where everyone else had gone.

"You are uh…. We aren't going to keep in touch, are we?" he asked, coming to sit next to her.

"No, I do not think so."

"Because of your boyfriend?"

"Not entirely. Squid, I need to move on with my life. This was only a stepping stone. I have goals, ambitions, and they don't really include you."

"You said you were bad in school. You spent too much time sleeping around to really focus. What else do you want to do?"

"Something else. Just… just something else."

"If you want someone better, I can change! I really can!"

She sighed, staring off into the fiery distance out the door, "Maybe you can, but I am not going to. I will leave her unscathed. Well, relatively. Everything I planned before I got here is still intact, with one minor detail. You don't fit in, Squid. You can't come with me. You and I are different people."

"You said you didn't have no plans! You said you just wanted to live your life from one party to the next! I can change my life! You can change yours! We can live on the straight and narrow! You won't sleep around, and I won't be me!"

"Squid, there is something I have to tell you…."


Glenn, Giorgio, Ada and Tyrone sat in the library eating chocolates and generally having a great time. They almost thought that they did not have any chocolates, much to Glenn's dismay, but a whole horde of it was found under Armpit's bed. Armpit almost woke up while they took it, but thankfully, he didn't. Wow, that was close.

"So, Tyrone, when are we getting out of this place? You made the plan," Giorgio asked as he unwrapped a chocolate.

"As soon as Caveman and Zero come back. There will be such a hubbub that we can fly right out of here. I have that weird new kid ready to hotwire a bus."

"That one who twitches?" Glenn asked.

"Yeah," Tyrone answered, staring at a chocolate he had just bit into. "Is this coconut?"

Ada grabbed the chocolate and stuffed it in her mouth, "Yeah, it's coconut."

"Hey! I was going to eat that!"

"Too bad. It was delicious. Deliciously disgusting!"

The group laughed and went back to their chocolates contently.


Alice hid behind a tent, basking in the little shade it left her with. She took a deep sigh and looked up at the sky. Maybe the sun would blind her temporarily, and she could go home. There was that time when Tyrone had thrown a pencil at her eye, and she couldn't see. Wow, that was a close one. If he had made her blind permanently, she wouldn't be at Camp Greenlake, and she would have a sob story to tell colleges. Life is unfair sometimes.

"Captain!" X-Ray appeared with outstretched arms from the other side of the tent.

"Oh dear god," Alice rolled her eyes. "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to be with you," X-Ray slammed down to the ground next to her, "is all."

"Seriously, what do you want?"

"That was it."

"You are lying to me! What do you want?"

"Do you think we will keep in touch?"

"No."

"Come on, you know you want to."

"Not really."

"Alice, come on."

She gave him a lazy, yet sympathetic, glare, "Please do not call me Alice, all right? Just… just call me Captain if you have to, but we do not need to be so personal."

"Why don't you like me?"

"I have a lot of reasons, but it is mostly because of how you act. You are a mean individual, and I don't enjoy your company."

"Look, I have never felt this way about a girl before and…"

"So you like guys then?"

"Hey, that was mean," he punched her slightly, and she laughed.

"Sorry, I had to say it."

"I like being with you. I like arguing with you. I mean, I like everything about you, and I don't know why because, you know, you are also not very nice. You are pushy, bossy, and insanely ambitious."

"What is wrong with being ambitious?"

He scratched the back of his head, "It… it makes you think out stuff before you do it, and it is exhausting."

"You are crazy."

"I also think it is cool that you are a spy, and a good one at that! I mean, you almost fooled me! I almost thought that you were just thrown into this for some other reason but…"

She simply stared at him in shock.

"Don't worry! I didn't tell anyone, and no one told me! I pretty much just figured it out. It was not really that well hidden with that crazy Ms. Gene, and I am really not that stupid."

"You figured it out on your own?" her voice bled of skepticism.

"Yeah. I mean, she was always calling people about some mission and interns, and then I figured it out when Zig-Zag was screeching about you all being spies. I guess that means he told me but… I put it together myself, I think."

She slumped back against the tent with a small smile and a shrug.

"Are you mad?" he asked, moving closer to her.

She shook her head, the smile still on her face.

He gave a small smile just because she was smiling and searched through his pockets, pulling out a tattered looking flower and handing it to her, "Found this in one of the holes. I think someone threw it in there. It's for you."

She took it with a wider smile and looked at him, "You know, X-Ray, you really aren't half bad."

"Really?"

"Really."

With that, he kissed her. He expected her to hit him or hurt him horribly, but when she didn't, it was encouraging. When they both pulled away with wide smiles on their faces, he took the flower out of her hand and put it in her hair.

"So, do you think we can keep in touch?" he whispered.

"You know, I have an idea about after we escape this place, if you're in."

"Oh, I'm in."


Tap scratched her nose and furrowed her brow, staring intently at nothing in particular as she sat with Zig-Zag on the steps of Mr. Sir's office. Both did not speak as they just stared into the distance, not really looking at anything at all, but looking at that nothing at all like it was the most entertaining thing they had ever seen. Then they both focused on something, a Jaguar racing toward a distant, distant, DISTANT hole that the Warden, Mr. Sir and Mom were standing around. They raised their right eyebrows at the same time as they witnessed an argument with a lady getting out of the Jaguar and the camp staff. Then Caveman and Zero got out of the hole, looking angry themselves. The two watched as the Jaguar came back, as well as the camp staff, Caveman and Zero.

Some stupid moron from Y-Tent screamed at the top of his lungs, "OH MY GOD! CAVEMAN AND ZERO!"

And then a whole ruckus started, though Tap and Zig-Zag did not mind. They simply watched as everything seemed to unravel. The Jaguar lady was Caveman's lawyer! Caveman was innocent! Caveman and Zero found a satchel of something! The Warden wanted it! It had Caveman's name on it! Caveman was going home with the satchel! Caveman would not go without Zero! The lawyer asked for Zero's papers! Zero had no papers! Caveman and Zero were going home! Mr. Sir was arrested because he was violating probation! It started to rain!

"And so on!" Tap smiled at Zig-Zag.

"And so on!" Zig-Zag smiled back.

All of the interns, some of which looked quite flushed and had no idea what was going on coughcause they were making outcough, ran up as Caveman and Zero pulled away. Tyrone gave a wide smile and gave the signal, which was a wink at the twitchy kid, and then smiled back at his friends.

"Ladies and gents, we are getting out of here," he whispered.

"What?" Greg asked, his mouth covered in lip gloss.

"When a bus comes around, it is our cue to…"

Tyrone was interrupted by the sound of helicopters and a SWAT team streaming into the camp. Gina, who was discussing with the police that Mr. Sir was in fact not violating parole, immediately froze.

"Gina Grant?" a professional looking man in a suit walked up to Gina with a horde of people behind him.

"Yes?" Gina narrowed her eyes. "I am a bit busy here, sir, so if we could make this quick?"

"Of course, Ms. Grant. I am just here to thank you for your wonderful intern spies for completing this mission."

All of the campers, who had been paying attention, looked at each other with a confused look. Spies?

"Oh, right. Well, I did train them myself. Hey, all of you, get over here!" Gina called to her interns with a flighty kind of importance in her voice.

They all walked forward, not understanding quite what was going on.

"The Girl Scouts of America thank you," the man said with a nod. "And I would like to inform you that you are all certified spies now. You will get your paper work shortly."

"Wait, Girl Scouts of America?" Gina lost all of her importance and her voice edged on poison.

"Well, yes, that's what this whole mission was for. They needed a camp," the man said.

Gina could not speak for a moment and looked like she was about to kill someone, "Excuse me?"

"The Girl Scouts of…"

"No, I got it, but you are telling me that I had to spend god knows how long with all of these wretched children because of the Girl Scouts of America!"
"There is no need to scream, Ms. Grant."

"Oh no, there is! The love of my life is going to jail because of this CRAPPY CAMP, and I am not even GOING TO GET A RAISE FOR THIS!"

"Well, no because it was for the Girl Scouts of America and not your spy agency."

Gina raised her hand in the air and yelped, "SET OFF THE BOMB!"

With that, she was tackled by a bunch of SWAT people and was dragged away, but not before Alice spoke to her.

"Hey, Gina, there never was a bomb," Alice gave a large smile.

"I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU! I HATE INTERNS! I HATE MY LIFE! I HATE CAMP GREEN LAKE!" Gina screamed as she seemed to drown in a sea of SWAT.

The man looked to Alice with a confused look, but then smiled, "You are the captain of this group, huh?"

Alice smiled, "I guess so."

"Well, you will be the youngest person to be in charge of a spy agency then. You all did a good job on this. Actually, all of you are the first agents to ever finish a mission at that agency."

"That is understandable. Thank you sir."

"Don't mention it. Oh, and if any of you need a ride home, we have helicopters."

With that, the man was gone. The interns all looked at each other and smiled.

"Wait, you are a spy! How could you not tell me?" Squid exploded on Adrienne, who looked at him slowly.

"I was going to but then people started screaming and stuff and… it just didn't get done," Adrienne gave a smile.

"You lied to me!"

"Uh… what?"

"So, you are a spy?" Magnet asked Juliana off handedly.

"Yeah," she answered with a shrug.

"Cool," Magnet shrugged as well. They both smiled at each other and laughed as Squid continued yelling at Adrienne.

Just then, the hotwired bus appeared with the twitchy kid driving with a large smile on his face.

"Well, that's our ride," Alice said as she grasped X-Ray's hand with a large smile.

"Wow, I'm going to be a spy, that is cool," X-Ray smiled back.

"Yeah right, I'm not making you a spy! You and Magnet can be secretaries or something. Or you can get our coffee."

"You know, I think I am going to pass on the offer. I was thinking about maybe being a repo man," Magnet gave a wistful smile.

"Wow, I am going to be with a guy who wants to be a repo man. Cool," Juliana gave him a small smile. "Hey, can we catch a ride with you guys?"

"No, intern. I am much too busy and important to help you," Alice said, sounding a lot like Gina.

Juliana laughed as the whole group started toward the bus except for Adrienne, Tap, and Zig-Zag. Tap and Zig-Zag had actually not moved from their spot during the whole thing, and Adrienne was still being screamed at by Squid. Juliana and Alice looked back, ushered their men on, and then went to her just as Greg raced into the bus with Trixie on his back.

"Are you coming, Ade?" Juliana asked just as Squid started to sulk quietly.

Adrienne gave both of her friends a big smile and shook her head, "No. I am going to get a ride with the SWAT guys. I uh… I am still going to Yale, and, well, I'd rather just get there for now. I really had no interest to be a spy. I just thought it would look good on my resume."

"You are going to Yale? Our relationship was built on lies! That's it, Brazen, we are over!" Squid put his foot down.

"We were already over, Squid. I kind of told you that," Adrienne snapped. "And the name is Adrienne. I wasn't actually a slut, okay?"

"Another lie!"

Juliana, Alice and Adrienne shared a look.

"Is he that stupid?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, yeah he is," Adrienne and Juliana said together.

They all laughed and then looked up at the rain.

"I just noticed it was raining," Juliana said as she ran her fingers through her wet hair.

"How do you not notice it is raining?" Adrienne asked.

"I just thought that would be a cool thing to say. Like in Four Weddings and a Funeral?"

"I hated that movie."

"You hated Four Weddings and a Funeral? Why did I ever love you?" Squid cried.

"SHUT UP, SQUID!" The girls said together.

"Well, I should go. Text, huh?" Adrienne gave a small smile.

The other two nodded, and the three went their separate ways, though Juliana and Alice were going to the same place. It would be separate after the two got off the bus, so it counts to say they were going their separate ways.

Zig-Zag and Tap continued to watch as the bus raced away, and Adrienne left in a helicopter. Tap turned to Zig-Zag with her brow still furrowed.

"So, I was thinking the first thing we could do is to see if the whole Mr. and Mrs. Smith thing could actually happen because there are these people who are married and from different spy agencies, and no one knows about it. Then we can go to Disneyland. Sound good?" Tap scrunched her nose.

"Sounds good. I think after Disneyland, we should try to create something that would erase people's memories like in Eternal Sunshine. Sound good?"

"Sounds good."

The two held hands as they walked to wear Mr. Sir's demolished truck was parked, ready to hijack it and hightail it to wherever they felt like it, discussing things they could do from movies in order that they would do them.

As the rain fell down, the mission was over, and the spies were forever changed. Except they weren't really because they all were pretty much the same, and none of them had really done anything to complete the mission. Actually, it was more just Caveman and Zero who did it all, and they weren't even spies. But that didn't matter because at the end of all of these stories, people are forever changed and so on and so on. So let's just say they all were, and end this with some witty, a little bit lame, a little bit clichéd line. You all are smart enough to think of one. Go on, have fun.

Fin.


So that is it. Thank you to the two people who reviewed my last chapter. Frosted-Windows, thank you for saying I am smat. I are way smat. I mean, smart. Oops, typo! I should write a sitcom! It would be funny! Okay, it probably wouldn't, but hey, at least I would try, huh? And Loudmouth1014, thank you for saying I was one of your favorite authors. There is no way in hell I am writing a sequel because I cannot think of anything to write about, but hey, maybe I will change my mind. And it will be dedicated just to you. So yay for you! Anyway, thanks to all them readers out there. The ending was a bit deux ex machina, but I liked it. Deux ex machina is good. Real good.