Tsubame: Hehehe… somebody reviewed saying that she wanted to read Meyrin's side of the story. I have to warn you though that I only have limited knowledge of Meyrin Hawke's character. So, don't be surprised if you think that she is out of character. If she is, I apologize and hope you like this chapter anyway. Writing Meyrin is definitely not my specialty… :P
This is just a collection of flashbacks I suppose… sigh… I really need more research on her character. Do you love it? Hate it? Are there any inaccuracies? I really like Meyrin…in all honesty. I do like her but her character was in my opinion, not completely developed. Don't get me wrong, ok? I'm no Meyrin hater…
I want to thank ou all for the reviews: White Butterfly, kenshinlover2002, -boos-, AnimeSiren, Kandida, cottongreentea, gseedlover, CaptKuchiki, Genny-chan, asga, Cagallifan, Garowyn, asucags, KiraTatashi, Cari-Akira, Cagalli-Yula-Athha, mistrial-angel, Feminist1991 and animemistress419…
Dedicated to: Cagallifan for giving me the idea… and White Butterfly for giving me her idea for this fic too. I'm sorry that I couldn't do it. I had trouble editing some parts. Sigh… I hope it is not that bad anyway…
Sorry for the bad grammar here. I didn't ask Garowyn to beta-edit this one. She needs rest…
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed or Destiny…all the characters are not my property. The only thing originally mine is the story. Enjoy.
"His side and her side of the story"
By Tsubame Ongaku
Part 3: Meyrin Hawke… her side
Meyrin Hawke had been working as Athrun Zala's secretary for a very short time. It was a temporary job. It was only until they could find a better replacement. It was summer vacation anyway and Meyrin didn't need to be in school until a few months. Until then, it was a pleasure to work with the veteran again.
But working with the Chairman was a grueling task. She sometimes mixed up the times, dates and appointments. But even after the third or fourth mix up, Athrun had just smiled and told her it was all right. It was only an accident.
Meyrin had never met such a gentleman before. Any normal person would have probably fired her by now. She always thought that she grew out of her crush on the Chairman but she was wrong. She definitely still liked him. She didn't have the courage to confess to him though. She'd repeatedly tried to. Believe it that she really tried but something always happened…
One time after his meeting with the council, she was finally alone with him. She had promised herself that it was the day that she finally told him...when they were finally alone together, Athrun had offered to buy her lunch as a thank you for staying with him at the meeting.
"Mr. Zala, there is something I want to tell you," she managed to speak out. Her hands were beginning to sweat. She kept sipping her tea nervously.
He smiled lightly as he too began drinking his tea and all the while reading from the report given to him. "Sure, Miss Hawke. What is it? I'm listening…"
She was having trouble breathing now. This was it! She was finally going to tell him.
"Mr. Zala, I lo---"
But what she had to say broke off, when suddenly the television turned on and a picture of Cagalli Yula Athha appeared. She had some minor wounds all over her, her once pristine white uniform was a mess and she was dragging a man away from a burning car.
"Princess of Orb, Cagalli Yula Athha, barely escapes flaming vehicle with her driver after an assassination attempt today," the anchor said. "Luckily, Miss Athha only received minor injuries and bodyguard, Kira Yamato, captured the suspects."
Athrun dropped everything he was doing immediately. He took out his cell phone and dialed.
The first thing he said was, "Kira, what in the world is going on?" he shouted, angrily. "I told you to protect her! Is this what you call protection?"
Athrun silenced as he listened to Kira's explanation. He did not look happy hearing it. He looked like he was ready to jump into the first shuttle to earth. After a few minutes, Athrun looked like he calmed down. "Is she…alright?" he whispered.
Meyrin listened for the reply. She heard, "She's alright. She's resting at the moment and I had to use sleeping pills on her." He sighed. "She was determined to go to work even after that." Kira chuckled, trying to lighten Athrun's mood. "You know how stubborn she is."
Athrun quieted for a moment and remembered the infuriating times he'd been with Cagalli. "Yes, I only know too well."
Meyrin watched him continue his rant and rages with his best friend, sadly. For Cagalli, he'd drop everything and anything. Nothing was more important to him than her safety.
That was not the only time it happened…
Another time was when Athrun miraculously had no appointments. She was so happy. That meant that he was free and that maybe she could finally tell him how she felt.
After narrating his schedule for the next day, Athrun had relaxed himself on the sofa. He hadn't slept for three days, making his proposal for the new hospital for the new colony.
She thought that maybe this was finally her chance to tell him how she felt.
"Mr. Zala," she stammered. There was no ringing telephone, no meeting to rush out to…no distractions of any kind. "There is something I…really want to tell you."
"Hmm?" he replied, lying down and closing his eyes. "Sure, tell me…I'm…" he stretched his arms out and yawned. "I'm listening."
"Mr. Zala," started to say. She couldn't blow this. Who knew when the next chance would be? "Mr. Zala… Iloveyou…" she said it all in one breath." She closed her eyes, waiting for his reply but none came. "Mr. Zala?"
Suddenly, Athrun snorted and rolled over to his side. He was asleep…
She didn't have the heart to wake him, not when he hadn't slept for three days and worked so hard. She left the room after that. She lost her chance yet again…
It broke her heart to see newspapers, magazines and pictures being delivered to him everyday. Before anything is given to the Chairman, Meyrin always inspected the contents of each package first. Everyday, it was the same. They all had pictures of the blonde everywhere and articles too about her latest achievements and functions.
She knew very well that he was very much in love with the princess. Even after she chose her country over him, he still loved her enough to watch over her from above…literally.
Athrun had given Meyrin an early break, saying that he was going somewhere anyway. She assumed that there was going to be another meeting that he needed to go to again. A few minutes later after leaving the office, she realized that she had left her purse on her desk. She had no choice but to go back for it.
"No." Meyrin could hear Mr. Zala's voice say from with the office. This surprised her. Shouldn't he had left a while ago? "I want it now! This is Chairman Zala and I need a shuttle to earth. Understand?"
She froze after hearing this. "Earth?" she whispered. "He's going back?" She stopped in front of the door and unable to move a muscle. He used his name as Chairman. It wasn't like him. He doesn't usually use his authority in such a way.
"Yes, so book me a flight…now." He gave an order. Meyrin moved away from the door and sat behind her desk. Seconds later, Athrun ran past her without even noticing her presence. She didn't even need to think about what he needed with a shuttle ticket to earth. He was going back…
On her desk sat her green purse, the one that she accidentally left and regrettably came back for. All she could do now was smile softly but she couldn't help but feel sad. She should have known that she was fighting a losing battle. Everyday, Meyrin did try her best to look nice to impress him.
She was delighted, the day when he complimented her but then she realized that he saw nothing but… a little sister…
She had gone shopping the day before. She was dressed in her new pastel pink dress and styled her hair in her usual jinkies. She applied some subtle make-up and just the right amount of peach perfume.
Meyrin stopped in front of a full-length mirror found in the lobby before you entered Mr. Zala's office. She watched herself on that mirror and couldn't help but smile. She achieved what she wanted. She twirled to see all of herself. She looked cute. All her life, She had lived in her older sister's shadow. Meyrin had always been too shy to actually go after what she wanted. Lunamaria Hawke had always been the "better" Hawke.
That was the problem with having a sister so pretty, smart and…well…perfect.
Meyrin walked into Mr. Zala's office, while trying to muster as much of her confidence as she could. He was busy on the telephone, when she entered. He was too engrossed with the conversation to even notice her at first.
"No, I don't think it is a good idea to use steel. Can't we get some better materials?" Athrun was frowning. He was obviously having an argument with one of the developers again. "I want to be assured that it will actually hold."
Athrun listened to the man speak, while Meyrin just stood there nervously and waiting for instruction. Suddenly, Athrun pounded his desk very hard. She almost jumped out of her skin. "I don't care how much it will cost! Money is no object! Just do it!" he slammed the phone.
It really scared Meyrin when Mr. Zala acted like that.
She watched him closed his eyes, and then massaged his temple. She felt sympathetic towards Mr. Zala. He always worked so hard and he was so young too.
Athrun looked up and finally saw her watching him. He smiled faintly but there were signs of stress and lack of sleep in his eyes. Office hours usually began at 9 am and it was still 8:30am. She was very aware of Mr. Zala's habits. She knew that he did not go home again and had been working the whole night. She was almost willing to bet that he might have gotten only zero hours of sleep.
"Good morning, Miss Hawke," he greeted her, formally. "You're very early this morning."
She returned his smile and bowed respectfully. "Good morning, Mr. Zala. I just wanted to begin my work early."
"That's good, what are my appointments for this morning?" he asked. He took out his reading glasses from its case and put it on. Even in glasses Mr. Athrun looked every bit as handsome.
She nervously scanned his day calendar and narrated the written items to him. He listened carefully. He was booked. He even had barely enough room to eat.
"I guess I have no room for sleep, huh?" he joked but she didn't find it very funny but she forced herself to laugh along with him.
Later, he stood up and handed her a small stack of folders from his desk cabinet to be filed. "I want these arranged and filed by the end of the day. Can you handle it?"
She nodded. He smiled weakly. "You know, Miss Hawke, you look adorable in that dress," he teased. Her heart began to pound. Was this it? Was this his way of saying that I'm beautiful? But then her heart sank, when he then began to ruffle my hair, as he chuckled…like a little sister…
Her heart sank even lower, when he said, "You know? If I had a little sister, she'd be like you…I bet." Then the phone rang and he was back to his Chairman of the PLANTS mode and had to leave because of an emergency at the military base again. She never had a chance to talk to him again that day.
He left very quickly but before she exited the office. A photograph suddenly caught her eye. She took a closer look at it and almost gasped. It was Mr. Zala and Miss Athha! On the beach… when it was taken? She couldn't really tell but Meyrin had never seen Mr. Zala so happy.
When was the last time he smiled like that? Or did he only smile like that…for her? Sadly, she looked at Miss Athha. She couldn't help but sigh at how beautiful she was. Even with her hair in disarray, her make-up slightly messy and gown rumpled, she managed to still look like a queen. She was a queen…with a knight in her arms.
How could she compete?
It took her a while to notice that her cell phone was ringing. Slowly, she answered it. It was a call from her sister. She didn't pick it up. She wasn't in the mood to talk to her sister. She had just let the answering machine get it.
"Meyrin, it's me, Luna," her sister's voice piped up, cheerfully. Meyrin could tell that it was forced though. "Mr. Zala called me earlier to tell you that he wants you to cancel all his appointments for a while."
Meyrin chuckled. "And we both know why," she whispered. She reached out for Athrun's calendar. He was supposed to be booked for the next few weeks. She began to delete the appointments one by one but she did not cry. Her heart was broken but she refused to cry.
Athrun had never been hers in the first place. She felt no hard feelings. She'd met and respected Miss Cagalli Yula Athha as a strong and brave leader and as a loving and caring person. Meyrin knew that she's take care of Athrun and Athrun would take care of her. The same way they've been taking care of each other though they're thousands of miles away from each other.
She sighed. She should be grateful. Maybe Athrun didn't love her back and she might never have a chance to tell him how she felt but at least she knew how she felt. Like they say, "it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."
Everybody had someone and maybe her someone was not Mr. Zala. There was a time that she thought that it wasn't fair. Miss Cagalli was a princess, beautiful, popular and could have any man she wants. It didn't seem fair that she had Mr. Zala too. But then she realized, it wasn't Cagalli's fault that Athrun loved her and it wasn't Meyrin's decision, whom he should love.
"I guess that's all," Luna said. "I'll see you at dinner. Unless, you want to join Shinn and I for a movie?" Shinn Asuka was now Luna's boyfriend. Luna was always inviting Meyrin to go on dates with them but Meyrin always declined. She didn't want to be the third wheel. "Call me, okay?" Luna hung up.
Meyrin just stared into space for a while. Then she felt her stomach growl, already calling out for food. She sighed, took her purse and walked towards the door. It seemed she she'd be on vacation for a while until her boss came back but who knew when that would be.
Meyrin decided to have her lunch break in a small, private café not too far away from the office. She didn't want to have lunch with her sister either. Her sister was usually with Shinn and Meyrin didn't want to intrude. Meyrin was used to having her lunch alone.
Meyrin loved that café. It was designed elegantly without looking too extravagant. It had a homey atmosphere that people couldn't help but just relax and unwind. She chose to sit on the corner where she knew she'd be quite alone. After ordering a salad and iced tea, she walked towards her little corner but then all of a sudden her cell phone rang. She reached into her purse while carrying her orders and walking.
While still reaching for her phone, she suddenly bumped into someone. The glass of iced tea toppled over, spilling its contents all over that someone and salad.
"Oh, no," Meyrin cried out. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to…this is…I mean…" she was rambling and she knew it. Why didn't she watch where she was going? She looked up hesitantly to see a boy about her age. He grabbed some tissues from a nearby table and began wiping the tea from his clothes.
He did not reply her apology. He just kept wiping and ignoring her. Meyrin did not like the way he was ignoring her. She was apologizing and he was just standing there pretending she wasn't even there.
"Hello?" she waved a hand in front of him, trying to get his attention. "Didn't you hear me? I said I was sorry."
"I heard you," he replied, not at all in a friendly way. He looked at her, obviously annoyed and bored. "Why can't you watch where you're going, little girl? You're so annoying." The boy met her violet eyes with his blue ones. If Meyrin weren't so furious, she'd actually think that the guy was cute, light blue hair and such dark eyes.
Meyrin at first froze in shock. The boy had looked familiar…almost too familiar. He looked like the boy she saw from the war, the one that had died, Auel Neider. But he couldn't have come back from the dead, she reminded herself. She frowned. "Hey, I already said I was sorry! The least you could do is at least said you'll forgive me! " She threw her salad at the boy's face. "And…for your information, not that it is any of your business, my name is Meyrin Hawke."
The blue-haired boy was furious. A little girl was practically covering him with food. "Do you have any idea who you're messing with, Miss Hawke?" he drawled. "My name is Cameron Sinclair. My friends call me Cam but since you're not my friend, you'll call me Mr. Sinclair."
"No, I don't know, Cam," she replied to him, defiantly using the name he told her not to use. "Usually I don't fight so you really caught me in a bad mood with your bad manners."
"Bad manners?" he yelled. "Who are you bad-mannered? Who's the idiot who bumped into me and spilled food all over me?"
"You deserved it," she snorted, folding her arms in front of her. "I apologized and you ignored me."
"Who would notice a… girl like you?"
She raised her chin higher. "If you were a gentleman, you'd buy me lunch to replace the one you spilled."
"The one I spilled? What do you mean I spilled?" The boy wanted to shake her insolence. "Do you see this lettuce on my head? You dumped it on me, remember?"
"You deserved it!" she yelled. "I was hungry, you know? I've had a bad day and I don't need your ugly attitude."
"My ugly…" he choked, but then screamed in frustration. He wrapped his hands around her neck. "Give me one good reason not to strangle you right now!"
"Are you sure this is the cafe, Luna?" Shinn asked his girlfriend. "Maybe she decided to eat somewhere else today."
Lunamaria shook her head. "No, she's here. I just know it." She dragged Shinn to make him move faster. "Whenever that sister of mine is upset, she always eats there."
Luna was very worried about her sister. She was perfectly aware of Meyrin's infatuation with Athrun Zala. She was also aware that he broke her little heart everyday, without even knowing it. Luna was worried that her little sister was upset and was sulking on her little corner again. Luna didn't want that. She didn't want her to be alone sulking over a guy…
"Luna, slow down." Shinn almost couldn't catch up with his girlfriend's pace. Shinn understood what Luna was feeling at that moment. Shinn had a little sister too. Whenever Mayu was upset and wanted to sulk alone, he wanted to sulk along with her. No matter how trivial the problem may be. Just to let her know that she wasn't alone and he wanted to be there for her.
They were almost to the café, when all of a sudden, Luna heard screaming from the inside. She also noticed that little by little customers were leaving the restaurant. "Shinn, is it me or that scream sounded very much like Meyrin?"
The two stared and each other, before finally shaking their heads at the ridiculous notion, Meyrin never screamed at anybody. It wasn't in her character. She was too shy and quiet.
"I told you! My name is Meyrin not girly!" Shinn and Luna heard someone shout. Luna and Shinn froze. It couldn't be…
"Stop calling me Cam!" Another person yelled back. It was definitely male and furious. "You're not my friend! I never gave you the privilege to call me by that name!"
Luna stopped the next person to go out of the restaurant. It turned out to be one of the waiters. "Excuse me? What is going on in there? Why are they screaming their heads off?"
The waiter sighed and shrugged. "The girl with red hair accidentally bumped into a guy with blue hair. She was apologizing at first and all of a sudden she started shouting and spilled her food all over the guy. They've been screaming ever since and scaring the customers away."
Luna smiled, forcefully. She was going to kill Meyrin later. "Thank you, sir."
The waiter nodded and then left.
Quietly, Shinn and Luna took a peek inside the café. Inside, they saw Meyrin with arms folded and eyes burning, furiously. She was fighting with a very good-looking boy, a good-looking boy with food all over him. They were yelling at each other both sides cried bloody murder.
But Luna, instead of getting upset began giggling. "I think we should go. I can see that my sister is fine now."
Shinn's eyes opened wider. "Are you crazy? They are at each other's throats. I think they want to kill each other."
Luna then began walking way. Shinn couldn't understand. "Luna, what are you talking about?"
She slowed down enough to have her boyfriend catch up to her. Then she grabbed his arm and wrapped her arms around his and rested her head over his shoulder. "She's going to be fine. Anybody who can fight with somebody like that…with such passion… made her far from heartbroken..."
"You mean?"
"Yup! She's over Athrun Zala even quicker than we first thought." She sighed.
THE real END
Tsubame: I'm an Auel/ Meyrin fan… I don't know why. Since Auel's dead… I made an original character… to look like him…For those who that that this chapter should be deleted, tell me…I will…
