Disclaimer: Don't own.

Uncertain Feelings

Part 3

Love me without fear; trust me without questioning; need me without demanding; want me without restrictions; accept me without change; desire me without inhibitions, for a love so free…will never fly away.

By: Apherion


Chapter 3: Pain

Sakura Point of View

Sakura had watched the battle commence in front of her eyes while Kakashi held her back. She feared her safety, knowing Itachi to be around and when Sasuke showed, her awareness increased ten-fold, as did her exhaustion.

Kakashi had his arms around her waist, clutching her to him. Naruto had caught them together, making love, and now he and Sasuke were fighting each other terribly. Her eyes widened when she saw something pull through Naruto's features as he welcomed the change, lashing out at Sasuke, whose sharigan was spinning. All too soon, she was plucked from Kakashi's grasp and she instinctively knew who was making the seals in front of her.

Her breathing quickened; she was helpless. If he decided to do something to her, she wouldn't be able to resist him. She felt him press her into a tree with his hot mouth covering hers. He darted his tongue inside, taking her in.

She let out a desperate cry when his hands reached underneath her shirt, grabbing hold of her chest, groping it inappropriately. She felt sick as he pressed her body into his, ravishing her mouth. He removed his hands from under her shirt, gripping her shoulders.

She tried to say 'stop' as he took breath, but it was to no avail. He forced her to the ground, looking at her with lust-filled eyes. She felt a kunai being pressed to her smooth, cream-colored skin at her throat. He toyed with her mouth, biting her lower lip none-too-gently. She whimpered as his hand when up her inner thigh, underneath the side-slit skirt.

Her panic-ensued mind as she felt him pull off her spandex-like shorts. She started to cry because there was nothing she could do. She felt the knife being pressed against her neck painfully.

"Don't scream or I will kill you," he whispered menacingly slipping his hand inside her panties, ripping them off. She shook her head, begging for him to stop. God no, please, don't let him do this to me. She silently prayed.

"Anything, I'll do anything but that," she pleaded, tears spilling faster. Itachi seemed to contemplate the offer, but he shook his head.

"Silly, naïve girl, I am afraid this is all I want from you," and she felt two fingers enter her roughly and uncaring. Tears came thick and fast, and Sakura was allowing them to overwhelm her. She couldn't do anything to stop it. She kept her eyes firmly shut when he withdrew from her. She kept telling herself it was a dream and that it wasn't real.

She felt his weight rise off her like a miracle. One eye opened squinted, not sure if he was gone or not. Upon seeing a man that hadn't been there before, her eyes widened when she saw that he had two different colored eyes looking around with fury. Kakashi, Sakura yelled inside her head, a soft smile gracing her lips for a second.

She watched Itachi recover from Kakashi's attack and she back away, further into the roots of the tree, shrinking into the shadows. Attempting to make her presence less known, she kept her mouth shut as well.

Kakashi was livid, performing seals to a jutsu that was new to her. It hit Itachi, causing him to stagger back, clutching his chest, but Itachi fired back with a look into the sharigan that was spinning fast. She watched his hands create seals too quickly to distinguish. A woman appeared almost instantly.

She was a beautiful woman, a woman with white hair and tanned skin. She was a woman who Sakura remembered with hatred, Kina. Itachi took hold of her, a kunai close to her throat, steadily drawing out blood one drop at a time.

Kakashi snapped from the sharigan image back to reality. He spotted Kina with Itachi and he began to move his hands so fast and quick, Sakura had barely seen him wrap thin, translucent threads around Itachi's wrists, prying them off of his ex-wife.

Somehow, Kina had managed to grab the knife from Itachi and she attacked Kakashi. The kunai was shoved into his chest, deep it looked like. She withdrew the kunai from within Kakashi, his blood gleaming scarlet on the sharp, metal knife.

Blood showered the ground and he fell to his knees and crumpled, lying flat on the ground, face up. The shock she felt went on for eternity and longer. Sakura stared skeptically at what happened, not wanting to believe what happened. My dream…my nightmare, she thought distractedly as the clear threads unwound themselves from Itachi's wrists.

Kina smiled in satisfaction of what she had done and took Itachi by the waist. He wrapped his arm around her and both disappeared in a white cloud of smoke. Both had looked at her stricken face, tears and revelation etched into it.

She helped Itachi. She betrayed Kakashi. She killed him. She wanted him dead from the beginning. Don't let it be true! Don't let it be true!

Sakura stumbled to her feet, tripping over them as she ran to Kakashi's side. God no, please don't let him… She collapsed on his chest, her hair congealing with the blood pouring from the wound there. She felt one of his hands wearily pet her head. She gasped in breath and cried harder out of joy.

"Kakashi," she whispered lifting her head up off his chest. She pulled down his mask and kissed him, and even though he kissed her back, he broke it too soon for her. She still had tears coming out of her eyes, her hand holding his blood-covered right hand to her left cheek.

"You have to go back," he breathed. She shook her head, clutching his hand to her face. "You have to warn Tsunade." His voice was barely above a whisper.

"No," she cried out, "I need you more." He shook his head at her, closing his eyes so he didn't have to look at her. She knew what he was thinking.

"Kakashi…" she started nodding her head as she spoke, "I'll get you better. I can," and she was about to put her other hand to his chest, but his left had stopped her.

"You don't have enough chakra to do it. When"-Sakura put a finger to his lips as soon as she felt his hand grow lose on her wrist.

"Shh, don't say anything…you're alive and I'm going to help you."

"You gave your word," he said it plainly, cold and indifferent.

"Not to let you die, I didn't!" Sakura wailed miserably. She felt the thumb on her cheek begin to stroke it softly.

"Sakura, I am going to." Sakura's nose burned and tears wracked her body senseless. Then she watched, almost as though a movie was playing itself over and over again in her head.

The seals for the teleportation jutsu and her hands were unconsciously doing them.

Her head was pounding from the lack of her chakra; she had drained it completely. She tried in hopes of getting him up, but it was no use. Her energy was depleted and she was trying her best to stay awake. She had gotten both of them back home. She felt strong arms embrace her, supporting her as he carried her.

She felt the blood emitting from the wound (not a lot of blood, but a good amount) matting in her clothing and the bouncing of him running. She could hear him whispering to her; incoherent were most of the things that he said. 'I'm sorry' penetrated once or twice and then she heard his deep drone once more. She could barely make out 'I did this' so she didn't dwell on it as much as she would've liked to.

Light flooded over her closed eyelids as voices began talking hushed and frantic. She heard Shizune's voice being called over to do something. Plenty of people removed her from Kakashi's grip, handling her, putting her to sleep so as to stop the fidgeting and fighting them to go back to Kakashi. He was injured, couldn't they see that? The spell they had put on her was too powerful and her weakened form began to droop.


She woke in a cold sweat, her heart racing. What day it was…it didn't matter. She needed to find Kakashi…Kakashi. Just the name itself sent into a whirl. She realized she was in the hospital and she looked at her only restraint.

She ripped the IV from the vein above here low's one off, all the while untangling her body from the sheets. Her feet connect with the cold tile flooring and she shivered violently from the contact. It wasn't as warm as his touch…his touch.

She padded down the hallways, dressed in the hospital dressing gown. She looked for him; frenzied and frazzled. She was crying before her search had any success, and was on the floor from exhaustion.

"Sakura," a familiar voice whispered. Sakura looked up, wiping at her reddening eyes. Recognition happened at once and Sakura stood, looking at Tsunade's apprentice.

"Shizune, where's Kakashi?" She avoided Sakura's eyes when the question reached her ears.

"I don't know, Sakura," she said it shiftily and she began to walk away from Sakura.

"Don't turn you back on me; where is he?" Sakura choked out from her crying. Shizune stopped and turned on the spot, beginning to cry.

"I'm sorry, Sakura," she cried, looking at Sakura as though she had done something to be truly sorry for (and she had). Sakura's heart stopped beating and her breathing broke.

"Tell me, Shizune, please, tell me," Sakura said calmly, eyes echoing panic. She took Shizune's hand, but Shizune snatched it back, shaking her head.

"No, tell me, I need to know, tell me." Sakura's voice stayed steady, but threatened to crack. Shizune closed her eyes, blinking out the tears. Sakura began to feel cold all over.

"He's…he's being…held captive," she breathed out with Sakura staring blankly at her. No…Sakura shook her head, no!

"You're shorts and everything was gone! I had no choice! Tsunade"-Shizune caught Sakura's form before it hit the ground. She had tried to explain it, but Sakura was deaf on hearing after hearing the words that came from her mouth. Her legs had given way for Shizune to catch her and start to drag her back to her room. Sakura fought, lashing out.

"Let go of me! You…you turned…" she became disorientated by tears pouring from her eyes. I'm never going to see him…I have to get out of here.

"That's not what happened," she wailed, falling hard onto the tile, shaking her head. Her mouth formed the word 'why' as she cried. Her eyes had closed, tightly clutching herself, rocking slightly. A hand lay on her shoulder to stop the rocking and shaking.

"I pried the information from Shizune, I knew what happened." Tsunade's cool voice said over the tears and sobs-but the attempts at breath and speech was stopped. She knocked Tsunade's hand away from her, turning to glare at her sensei.

"You didn't, you didn't!" Sakura cried in hysterics. This was far worse than seeing him with Kina. He was being snatched from her forever if she didn't do anything. She looked at Tsunade like she was the enemy and Shizune like she was the accomplice. It was terrible knowing he was in the arms of another woman. Now it was terrifying that his life and freedom hung in the balance of conviction.

"It's all right Sakura; he won't be able to touch you anymore." Tsunade must've thought that her words were consoling and full of comfort, but Sakura fell to her knees, legs given way to the shaking.

"I want his touch, and you're taking what I want," she mouth the words, tears leaking out of her closed eyes.

"Let me see him, please," she begged helplessly. She saw the look Shizune gave Tsunade; she caved.

"Yes"-she didn't wait for the sentence to finish. Pushing past her teacher and the other student, she ran as fast as her weary legs would allow.

When she came to the headquarters of interrogation (ANBU usually the interrogators), she pushed past the two ANBU guards, both bewildered by her sudden appearance. Sakura quickly found her one innocent person-amongst the wretched-who was guilty of nothing but loving her. He was standing against a wall in a grey shirt with black pants. He looked aloof as ever even without the mask he was unreadable-with his hands in his pockets, but she saw both eyes widen in elated surprise.

"Kakashi," she said breathlessly like 'I've finally found you'. She ran into his arms and felt him grip her tight, kissing the top of her pink head. She hugged him back with as much force as she could, feeling everything about them melt away.

"Sakura," he whispered into her hair. She felt his fingers wrap around her chin and pull it up to look into her face. She let her hands roam across his chest, feeling where the knife had stabbed him so deeply. How had he healed so fast? It had scarred, but then again, the wound was terrible. She then came to the only conclusion that was possible. He had used as much of his chakra to heal the wound with the Chidori, and then he had taken them both to the hospital. She looked into his eyes, silently pleading with him.

His hand stroked her cheek lovingly. It cupped the cheek and drew it closer to him. His lips embraced hers, the swooning immediately starting. Someone interrupted the kiss (the inmates too busy not paying attention to notice), banging a stick on the wall beside him.

"No affection past hugging for you two," the ANBU said irritably. Kakashi broke the embrace and sat down, still leaning against the wall. Sakura followed suit, feeling him pull her into his lap. Kakashi nuzzled his cheek against hers and her stomach disappeared completely from the affection he was giving her and she was giving into. She didn't blame him for what had happened though.

She felt her tears make their presence known by the pickling sensation at the corners of her eyes. His hands gently placed themselves on her hips, moving her off him. She felt the hands move from her waist. His right hand touched her left cheek, wiping away the tears that had fallen onto it.

"Don't cry," he whispered. She looked at him, turning her head the right. His eyes were soft and kind. She felt the tangible amount of love he had for her, love-not friendship or fondness-true love. Her soul tore; her heart broke.

"You can't let them do this! You can't"-his finger pressed itself to her lips, stopping speech with a muffled 'uh' emitting from an almost formed word.

"I loved you Sakura, more than you'd ever know. I loved you when I had seen you come out of the two-week coma you had indulged yourself in. You don't remember it, that year you were different, but I still loved you. You grew back into your old self, and I loved you further. I was surprised at how you grew from Sasuke's rejection, opening your eyes. I saw your two teammates become brothers to you and I became something closer than a teacher; your friend." She scooted closer to him; letting him hold her, enclose her. He continued to talk.

"Sasuke left hell-bent on vengeance, and Naruto accepted that he would never be able to date you. You grew closer to me when Naruto studied under Jiraiya." She put her head on his shoulder and he laid his head on hers. His messy silver hair hitting her forehead softly, but she didn't mind it whatsoever.

"You loved me in return, and for that I was grateful. You could've pushed me away after all I had done to you, but you didn't. There could've been someone else, but there wasn't. You always came back to me...looking for me," he managed to choke out the last few words before she knew he was crying softly. She held him to her, letting him hide his tears on her shoulder.

"There was no one else; I had to have you. I couldn't go on without knowing. I had to know if you loved me"-tears soaked her cheeks. "I needed you in a way you probably didn't know until later." His tears dried, and he whispered, "I know," into her hair while she shook with silent sobs.

"Tsunade has orders, leave now," the same ANBU guard called to them, looking utterly disgusted with the couple. She squeezed him back when he held her tighter. She moved from the warmth of his arms to the coolness from not having them about her.

She walked away from the place; she wasn't going home. Home for her was with Kakashi and everywhere without him was abyss. She would be going somewhere that was as close to Kakashi as she could be: his place.

She shifted the plants around his door, seeing the eccentric prints of keys on each tile. She slid her hand across each print until one seemed to have more of a shape. She closed her fingers around the spare key and plucked it from the wall of keys. One thing that could be learned from Kakashi was never to assume things were as they appeared.

She shoved the key into its hole inside the doorknob. She turned it until she heard the audible click of a lock sliding out of its place. She withdrew the key and slipped it back onto the wall, its hiding place amongst the many drawn keys.

The doorknob turned at the slightest touch from her hand, and she pushed the door open quietly with a small creak of the hinges. The house was as empty as her heart felt.

She wasn't going to be able to see him again. He wasn't coming back. In truth, what he had asked her to do before this whole thing started seemed impossible…but it was corrected later on as improbable.

She shut the door behind herself as she cleared the passageway. She felt light as she drifted into his empty room. She barely recognized herself as she pulled back the sheets that both had been in what seemed too long ago to remember possible. She gave vague notice to her climbing into the bed, clutching the pillow that smelled of him to her face. Her body curled into his sheets, and she began to cry herself to sleep.