A.N: I would like to thank the following reviewers…

Uptowngirl48: Yes I did! And my sincerest apologies for having made you wait for so long!

Valinor's Twilight: I am honored without a doubt by the encouragement you bestow upon us. Please be sure to encourage us in the selfsame way!

KellseyKisaragi: Thank you so very much! It is really encouraging to know I am someone's favorite author. And I am indeed happier that now I know that 'someone's' name. Thank you.

Princess Shadowcat: Patience! Patience, precious! You shall know it soon enough!

Now that all is settled, let the story begin!

Disclaimer:

I don't own Arda. And Tolkien owns it all. But he still doesn't own Olwen or Séregon or Anya or Ithilwen or Karnil or …… you get the picture. Don't you?

Thoughts or dreams are in Italics

- Anarya of Lorien

CRYSTAL DREAMS


Chapter – 24 (The wrong things to say)

Haldir's Point of view:

I ran as fast as I could. It seemed like another lifetime when I found Orophin stand in front of my talan, sweat faced and ashen, his breathing ragged. It seemed like another lifetime when I heard that Anya had fainted. I never knew time could be such devious a thing. It crawled when you needed it to pass quickly and when you felt it to stop, it flew. I soon found myself climbing the stairs that led to her talan faster than I had ever done before.

I opened the door to find Ithilwen and Olwen sitting in the living room, deep in conversation. I hardly registered the surprised looks in their faces as I proceeded to her room, where I knew she lay. I did not care to open the door gently. She was lying there staring at me, surprised. I strode up to her, my mind racing with rage and concern.

I flopped onto the bed by her side and caught her face, a little too hard.

"What did you think you were doing?" she was startled for she said nothing. She then turned to look at the door where I found Ithilwen and Olwen looking at us, their mouths open. I nonchalantly got up from where I sat and shut the door and had it locked.

"March Warden-"she began. But I cut her short.

"You shall listen to me when I speak and shall not interfere. Do you understand?" my voice had risen a bit. She looked at me in silence.

"I agree you do not care for me at all! But what of our child? Why didn't you think of him? Answer me, Anya." I was angry at her. I was angry at myself and I was angry at everyone. She lowered her eyes and sighed. Of all the reactions I had expected, this was not one.

"Are you not going to fight back?" I asked her sarcastically.

"I am sorry." I turned around to look at her properly. She was still staring at her hands.

"What?" she looked up at me. Her eyes though weren't in tears; I knew she was close to them.

"Anya…" she cut me short.

"Haldir, I am sorry. I know I should have been more careful. I am sorry." I closed my eyes as I took a deep breath. I turned around to face the wall, though I could see her in the mirror that hung there.

"How did this happen? Did you overexert yourself or something?" she looked away, avoiding my eyes as she nodded her head. There was something amiss somewhere. I sat down on the chair by her side.

"Anya-"

"-I said I was sorry. What more do you want?" she bit back. I was taken aback. Why did she turn so defensive every time I wanted to approach her with a sane approach? I felt my anger return.

"Well you'd better be! I swear I shall not forgive you if something ever happens to my son." She looked up at me with scorn.

"Your son, March Warden? What am I then? The kid's nanny?" I smirked as I said,

"You behave like one. You seem so careless. It is as though you do not care at all." I knew I had spoken too much for the next moment I knew I had hurt her when I saw her startled eyes overflow with tears.

"Anya-" she held her hand out, gesturing me to stop and then pointed to the door. I stood my ground. She looked up at me and glared. There was so much loathe in her eyes for me that day.

"This child is mine. My own! I will never do anything to harm her. Now you'd better leave March Warden!" I glared back at her though I knew I was to blame this time. I marched to the door and with one fluid motion, swung it open. Ithilwen and Olwen looked up at me from the couch as I walked past them. I did not even spare them a glance as I walked out of her talan into the night air. Dawn was approaching soon. Perhaps she would be more sensible then.


Anya's Point of view:

I was seriously startled to find Haldir march into my room, his face pale. He seemed to have run really fast for he was breathing faster than usual. But it could also be because he was livid enough to kill me? I waited with bated breath as he sat down beside me and caught my chin with his finger, a little too tight. I squirmed.

"What did you think you were doing?" he asked me through gritted teeth. I was startled and scared. I turned to look at the door to find Ithilwen and Olwen stand there, looking at this as though they were seeing the end of the world. Haldir must have sensed their presence for he stood up and walking to the door, shut it right at their faces. I could hear the lock turn and I felt stranded. I knew I had to retort.

"March Warden-"

"You shall listen to me when I speak and shall not interfere. Do you understand?" he cut me short. I was seriously intimidated. His voice resembled that of a captain reprimanding a recruit for some grave error. I felt like I had shrunk two feet in front of this elf. I did not speak.

"I agree you do not care for me at all! But what of our child? Why didn't you think of him? Answer me, Anya." I felt it then, the mother's intuition. He had just made it clearer that from what had happened to me, I could have easily lost my child. I felt scared. I felt guilty. I knew he was expecting me to fight back. Yet I had no witty lines to throw at him. I lowered my eyes, not wanting to show him that I might cry any moment now.

"Are you not going to fight back?" I could sense the sarcasm in his voice. He was mocking me, yet I felt no anger. I only felt guiltier if possible.

"I am sorry." I mumbled not looking up. I could sense he was surprised.

"What?" I looked up at him. His eyes were both surprised and skeptical. Then, slowly there emerged a tinge of gentleness in those enigmatic grey pools.

"Anya-" I did not let him continue.

"Haldir, I am sorry. I know I should have been more careful. I am sorry." I felt him exhale as he turned around to face the wall. For some reason, I wanted him to look at me, to sit beside me, to hug me. I gulped my tears as I heard him ask, a gentler tone, that seemed to reflect his concern for the child.

"How did this happen? Did you overexert yourself or something?"

It was for the child and not for me, I reminded myself. I regained some of the composure I had lost when I saw him enter. I turned away and nodded my head. I couldn't tell him the incident with Séregon yet. I knew that would lead to further problems. I felt him sit down on the chair. I couldn't deal with this anymore. I needed him gone. I did not want to have my barriers broken. I felt something I had never felt before.

I knew he felt the child to be his responsibility but then…was he visiting me only for the child. Was he burdened with this responsibility? Did I mean nothing to him?

"Anya-"

That tone! I felt myself melt as I heard him call my name.

"-I said I was sorry. What more do you want?" it seemed as though some one else had spoken, some alien from within myself. I felt his body stiffen.

"Well you'd better be! I swear I shall not forgive you if something ever happens to my son." So it was about the child wasn't it! I looked at the tall elf with as much scorn as I could muster.

"Your son, March Warden? What am I then? The kid's nanny?" he smirked. I felt affronted.

"You behave like one. You seem so careless. It is as though you do not care at all." What? What did he mean by that? That I did not care for the child at all? Wasn't I the mother? Wasn't I the one creature who would give birth to it? Wasn't I the one who bore the child? What did he mean by that? I felt tears run down unchecked.

"Anya-" he was trying to make amends. Now I knew! He would never love me. He still considered me below him. My heart burned at the accusations he leveled against me. I felt my blood boil. I held my hand up to stop what ever he was saying. I was too shocked and angry to say anything. He stopped. Good. I then pointed to the door. I wanted him to leave and to never come back! I did not desire to see his face ever again. I wanted to leave. I wanted to be away from this monster. I looked up to find him still there, his eyes boring at me. I glared at him. I felt anger like I had never felt before.

"This child is mine. My own! I will never do anything to harm her. Now you'd better leave March Warden!" I felt some satisfaction when he could do nothing but glare at me and walk to the door and shut it behind him with force. It was when I was alone again that I wept. I wept for me, for my child and for all that had happened.

Soon, Ithilwen and Olwen dropped in and I would have laughed at their expressions had I not been under so much mental tension. Ithilwen flew to my side and hugged me, consoling me however she could. Olwen had gone to fetch the Miruvoir again. I would need it, I thought.

When Ithilwen had listened to all I had told her, she was cursing Haldir openly. I had never heard her talk a word bad about Haldir before.

"How dare he say that to you? After all that he has made you go through! I think I shall have a talk with him." I caught her hand before she could leave. She turned to look at me, her face still angry.

"No Ithilwen. I don't think you should." She was about to protest when she caught my eye. She sighed and sat down beside me. I hugged her again. At the least one good thing did happen of me coming here! I had a friend for life in Ithilwen. I smiled as I hugged her tighter.


To be continued…

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- Anarya of Lorien.