Chapter Twenty

Been and Gone

Nathan

Two trains 150 miles apart are travelling toward each other along the same track. The first train goes 60 miles per hour; the second train rushes along at 90 miles per hour. A fly is hovering just above the nose of the first train. It buzzes from the first train to the second train, turns around immediately, flies back to the first train, and turns around again. It goes on flying back and forth between the two trains until they collide. If the fly's speed is 120 miles per hour, how far will it travel?

Uh, excuse me, what?

I reads the problem back again, reading it slower, but that doesn't help at all.

Here's a question? Why do we need to know about the stupid fly and how far it's travelled? Why is that important in the grand scheme of things? Why can't we focus on problems that actually occur like when you start seeing someone differently? Or like someone's been drugged and you've got to solve who did it? Where the hell do you find the guy that did it?

Those kinds of problems just may come in useful!

I hear the door downstairs slam and roll my eyes. Dad must be in. Mom said he'd went out to drink because he was so angry at me and Lucas for being kicked out of the game tonight, and I was kind of hoping she meant all night. Guess not.

I turn back to my homework, chewing the end of my pen. Of course, I can't even picture the dumb fly because the only picture in my head is that of Haley, and my need to pound Rob's head into the ground

What do you do when you realise you like a girl that you initially just wanted to screw, and that someone you considered a friend tried to date rape that girl?

Yeah, something like that would be useful.

I can't really think about it much more because the door to my bedroom slams open and Lucas is stood there, face like thunder.

"Hey, you can't just barge into my bedroom!" I yell. "We may have been all Mulder and Scully today but that does not mean we're like brothers all of a sudden."

"No Nate, shall I tell you what you can't just do? You can't just steal my girlfriend!" Lucas yells back at me. I drop my pen. "And Mulder and Scully? Couldn't you have came up with a better teaming than that?"

"What are you talking about?" I ask. Not about the Mulder and Scully comment – that was kind of lame – but about the 'steal my girlfriend' part. I mean, I haven't' stole his girlfriend. Not yet anyway.

"I'm not stupid Nathan. I saw how determined you were today. You got so worked up about everything because you like her, admit it!"

"Okay!" I yell. I don't know what made me do it, but it's like the filter that stops me from saying what I mean has just fell out and deserted me. The tension after that is unbearable. "Okay," I say again, quieter this time.

Lucas gives a sardonic little laugh. "You're never satisfied Nate, ever since I came here as a kid you've just took whatever you want from me. Toys that you don't even play with, books that you don't even read, movies that you don't even watch."

"It's not like that," I say, because it's not. I have to defend myself. I went after Haley because she's Lucas's girlfriend, but I didn't fall for her because she was. I fell for her because she's Haley! She's sweet and funny and feisty and just… Haley.

"Why isn't it? Are you telling me you didn't go after her because she was my girlfriend?"

"That's how it started," I admit, because I need him to believe that I care about her, and the only way to do that is to be honest. It's kind of a new concept for me. "I wanted to sleep with her and leave her to show you that I can have anything you have, and that I could do it better… but it's not like that now."

Lucas smiles at me, a smile that has my back up. What is he up to. He throws his mobile at me. "Try telling Haley that."

I look down at the phone and see that it's switched on, and in the middle of a call. The words 'HALEY' seem to glare out at me in big black letters.

Oh God no. What have I done?

I raise the phone up to my ear. "Haley?" I say, softly, praying to God that she disconnected before my rant.

"I don't want you to ever speak to me again," she says, her voice muffled and far away.

"Haley, you've got to understand…"

"Don't…"

Don't. My mind is taken back to our kiss. I wiped a tear from her face, and she said 'don't.' The phone goes dead.

I look up at Lucas, who's still stood there, grinning his sardonic grin. "She deserves better than you Nathan, she just needed to know it." He walks over and grabs the phone out of my hand. I can't say anything.


"Get up."

I open my eyes slowly. It's still kind of dark, and I can hear rain hitting my window.

"Up, now!"

I turn around and see my Dad stood in the door, dressed completely in running gear. I groan and throw the covers over my head. "Go away."

The next thing, the covers are being thrown off me and the cold hits me like a thousand knives. I don't care, I think I'm in self-pity mode.

Of course, I'd be a lot more sure of that if I knew what self-pity mode was. I've never been in it before.

"Get up Nathan. No son of mine is getting sloppy because of a missed match, the first in the season might I add."

I sit up and rub my eyes. "Well why don't you go and wake your other son up?" I ask. Dad glares at me.

"Don't talk smart to me Nathan. I know that you're brawn is ruling your head right now, but don't forget that you're living under my roof. Now get up!"

I feel like shit and I am not going for a run, especially not with him. I jump up and pull on a sweatshirt and a pair of jeans.

"You can't run in jeans Nathan," Dad says, looking at me suspiciously. I ignore him and barge past him, down the stairs and through the front door, ignoring my Dad's yelling.

I know exactly where I'm going. If I don't talk to Haley, then I'm going to be stuck in this stupid self-pity for the whole day.

The street she lives in is modest, and some of the houses look plain dilapidated. When I reach her house I walk up the drive and raise my fist to the door.

And then I see that it's five in the morning.

Ugh, I hate my dad.

Ah screw it. I need to talk to her. I pick up a stone and take a guess at which window is hers.

After three shots, I've lucked out as Haley's head appears out of the window. She takes one look at me and goes back in, slamming the window shut.

I pick up another stone and threw it. She opens the window again.

"What are you doing?" she whisper-yells.

"I need to talk to you," I whisper-yell back.

"Well, I need you to get as far away as possible."

She goes to shut the window again but I yell her name. really loud.

"Jeez, Nathan, what is your problem?"

"If you don't come down, I'll yell a lot and cause a scene," I shout back. She surveys me for a second. "Fine, I'll be down in a couple of minutes. Just…be quiet, okay?" She closes the window again.

I sit down on the wet grass, closing my eyes and wondering how the hell I've screwed this up so much with probably the only girl I'll ever like.

After what seems like forever, I can feel someone else's presence. I open my eyes and see Haley looking down at me. Her eyes are unreadable and her mouth set in a straight line. I want her to sit down, she's making me feel uncomfortable.

"Okay Nathan, you've got exactly two minutes. Go."