Disclaimer: I own CSI, I wrote the Bible, I painted the Mona Lisa, and I invented green beans… oh, wait… Seriously, if I owned them we wouldn't have had to wait six years to see them together. Please don't sue, I'm just borrowing; I own nothing-not Frank Sinatra, not Shakespeare, not CSI. I only own all the grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.
A/N: I found this sitting in a file on my computer, completely forgotten. It was written during season five, and contains minor spoilers for seasons 1-5. I hope you enjoy it.
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Sara was tired; very tired. She'd been getting more run down lately. Maybe it was time for her to take one or two weeks of the vacation time she had stored up.
"Yeah… like that's going to happen," she snorted to herself. She sighed and shut her locker before heading to her vehicle.
She had pulled yet another double and was looking forward to a couple hours of sleep after a hot shower. Oh, and some re-heated chow mein would do well to fill her stomach too.
As she pulled out of the parking lot, she turned on her radio and started searching for something worth listening to. The velvet crooning of Frank Sinatra came through her speakers and she let his soft voice start to relax her.
I've got you, under my skin!
I've got you deep in the heart of me!
You're so deep in my heart, that you're truly a part of me.
And I've got you under my skin!
I've tried so not to give in
I've said to myself "This affair, it never will go so well."
But why should I try to resist when Baby, I know so well
That I've got you under my skin.
I'd sacrifice anything come what might
For the sake of having you near
In spite of the warning voice that comes in the night
And repeats (how it yells) in my ear:
"Don't you know you fool you never can win?"
"Why not use your mentality? Wake up to reality!"
But each time I do, just the thought of you
Makes me stop, before I begin.
Because I've got you, under my skin…
As she listened her heart gave a sad kind of a lurch… Old Blue Eyes could do it; he'd sacrifice anything. So, why couldn't her blue-eyed man risk anything for love?
Love? Had she really used that term? Was love too strong a word? Not for her… she loved him, she did. As a friend, as a mentor… and as a man.
It had started as something of an infatuation. When he had spoken at the seminar she had attended, he spoke so clearly and so passionately. He spoke of finding the truth; of aiding justice. He was handsome, brilliant, and understandably, she had felt drawn to him.
He spent quite a bit of time after his lecture talking to her and answering the questions that she had not been shy in presenting. He seemed impressed by the depth of her understanding, but before long an annoyed and frazzled looking conference coordinator came to rush him to his next engagement. They managed to quickly exchange contact information (much to the distress of the coordinator who was already worried about the time), and a week later she had e-mailed him. Oh yes, she had been infatuated with him then. As they kept in contact her feeling of respect for him grew, but unfortunately for her, so did her other feelings.
She hardly thought twice before accepting his offer to come work for him. She thought maybe, just maybe, there was more to the offer than what was directly stated. They had an undeniable spark and she knew he felt it too. His flirting and kind attentions had raised her hope even further.
However, here she was, five years later, and nothing had come of it. That's not to say nothing happened. Things happened all right! The looks, the comments, her invitation to share dinner, her explanation of her family life, not to mention his strange and heart-breaking confession to a criminal doctor… all those things happened, just none of it had lead to what she most wanted. The only result was her falling in love with a man who was so paralyzed by his fears he would rather live sad and alone than let her into his life.
She wasn't arrogant, but she knew he felt more for her than he let on. He himself had admitted that she was some he could have feelings for if he let himself.
She pulled into her parking lot; sighing deeply before turning off her vehicle and heading up to her apartment. She flipped on her light as she entered and let out another deep sigh as she looked around the tiny space she called home. Her scanner crackled quietly in the corner, she'd left it on so the place wouldn't be so quiet and feel so empty when she got home.
"Pathetic!" she thought almost shaking her head at herself. "I should really get an animal. Maybe a cat…" However, a cat seemed so old-maidish, and they didn't allow dogs in her apartment.
"Hmm..."
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Grissom removed his glasses and rubbed his red and tired eyes. He signed the last paper in the pile on his desk. There, now he was all caught up on his paperwork. It had taken two days out of the field to finish, but Ecklie had been getting demanding.
He rubbed the back of his stiff neck while rising slowly to his feet; he stretched leisurely, allowing the blood to flow properly through his legs again. As he stretched he tidied his desk before heading over to the glass case sitting on the shelf. He put his hand in and coached his Chilean Rose tarantula onto his hand. He lifted her out of her terrarium and let her crawl slowly over his hands.
Sara walked through the open door, case folder in hand, and head down.
"Grissom?" she said, looking up from the open file.
"Shhh…" he said, raising a finger slightly, "you'll scare her. Look, she's already bristling."
"Sorry," replied Sara lifting her hands and lowering her voice in a sign of compliance.
She watched transfixed as the spider moved gently from hand to hand as Grissom moved to put her back in her terrarium.
"What is it, Sara?" he asked as he replaced the lid back on the glass case after making sure the critter was safely inside.
"Umm…" she started; eyes still on the tarantula, "yeah…"she pulled her eyes up to his. "I've got the results you wanted from the lab."
She handed him the file with a smile, then, sending one more interested glance in the Chilean Rose's way she turned and left the room.
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Sara sat on her bed; her TV was on, but it was going unwatched. She was thinking back to the way Grissom's spider had moved gently through his fingers.
"Well, I would like something to come home to. I never considered a tarantula before, but I kind of like the look of them. Of course, I'd have to look into how hard they are to care for…" she thought as she jumped up and went to her computer to do a little research.
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"Hey Grissom, do you have a second?"
He didn't lift his head from the file he was immersed in; instead he lifted one finger to indicate that he needed a minute. She waited patiently until he was finished writing a note or two down from something he had noticed in the pictures he had before him. When he was finished he lifted his head with an expectant and slightly apologetic expression on his face.
"What can I do for you?" he asked and then immediately said "Oh!" in interest; for there, in Sara's arms was a terrarium.
"What's that?" he asked, clearly perplexed, "Part of a case?"
"No, it's the home of my newest roommate; a tarantula. I was wondering if you could give me some tips on how to set it up and such before I pick up my tarantula from Peta's Pets?
"Sure, what do you want to know?" he asked looking interested, even excited at the prospect of having another creepy crawly around.
"Well, I found out most of what I need, I just figured that, being the expert and all, you may have some tips for me."
"Okay, what kind of tarantula are you getting?"
"A Brachypelma Emilia."
"Ah, yes, the Mexican Redleg. That's a very good "beginner spider" and they have very nice coloring. That's what my very first one was. I assume you're getting a female since they live longer?"
"Yes, that's what the pet-store clerk recommended."
"Good, I had a male once and he spent all his time trying to escape his cage so he could find a mate. We ended up calling him Houdini; I couldn't seem to find anything that would hold him in. It drove my mother crazy," he smiled at the memory and Sara smiled too. It was so nice when he shared things about himself.
"Well, as to the caring of your arachnid, I doubt I have much to add to what you already have been told. Mexican Redlegs are fairly hardy. She should be pretty docile, and she will probably be a little shy as well. Spiders are actually quite delicate and a fall can kill them, but I'm sure you know how to handle them gently. "
She nodded.
"As to the set up of the terrarium," he said as he cleared a spot on his desk and motioned for her to bring it over, "this is how I have mine set up and Rose likes it just fine," as he said this he started to demonstrate his arrangement with her terrarium.
"You have a Chilean Rose, right?" Sara asked with a smirk.
"Yes, good identifying, but... why the smirk?" he asked.
"You have a Chilean Rose and her name is Rose?" Sara prompted still smirking and adding a raised eyebrow.
"Yes," he said looking puzzled, "is there something wrong with that?"
"Well, it's not a very creative name, is it? It's like calling a Dalmatian "Spot". I guess I expected something Shakespearian from you."
"First of all, Rose is a fine name and Shakespeare did write: "What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet." And secondly, I didn't name her. She came with the name and I didn't think a name-change was necessary. I didn't foresee anyone finding it offensive."
He tried to look mildly annoyed, but he was really enjoying the light banter and so he gave up and twitched the corner of his mouth in a classic Grissom "almost smile". She returned his twitch with a genuine, but shy smile of her own and then, suddenly, he couldn't break the gaze. As had happened so many times before, a thousand thoughts ran through his mind. She was so intelligent, and here she was, discussing arachnids with him, looking great… and why had he never made an effort towards her? Oh, yeah, he had been a coward. At the time, things like the fact they worked together, and their age-gap had seemed so big; so insurmountable to him. He had been a jerk and now it was surely too late for him. Or was it? She had started smiling at him again, and they were back to having moments like this one more frequently… He wasn't really sure when everything had changed for him, but he now knew what he wanted, and he was willing to do what was needed to get it. He had to ask her if he still stood a chance.
"But not now," he thought, breaking the gaze and redirecting his attention to the terrarium again, "not now, but soon... when the time is right."
"Here you are," he said, obviously somewhat embarrassed, "this should be just right for her. I assume you have a source of heat, right?"
"Yeah," she said, also feeling awkwardness of the moment, "I read that a heat lamp can dry them out too much and that a heating pad was best, so that's what I got."
"That's true," he said, glad to grab onto a more scientific conversation to cover their awkwardness, "also, water is very important for arachnids, they can survive on very little food, but water they need constant access to."
"I'll keep that in mind," she said as she gathered her terrarium up and headed for the door.
"If you need further assistance, feel free to ask. Good luck."
"Thanks, and I will," she said with a smile before awkwardly shifting the terrarium to a more comfortable position and leaving Grissom's office.
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"Sara?" said Grissom one night several weeks later when they were alone in the break room. He had been meaning to talk to her, but to tell the truth, he was still rather cowardly when it came to her.
"Yeah?" she answered, munching some fruit salad while Grissom grabbed a cup of coffee.
"How are you doing with your Mexican Redleg? Has she settled in all right?" He did ask out of interest, but he was also glad for an easy conversation starter. He had been making an effort towards having real conversations with her; about real life, and not just work.
"Oh, she's fine. I held her for the first time the day before yesterday."
She was smiling and her eyes were shining as she spoke. He had never seen a woman actually excited about holding a spider before, and he didn't think he could ever be nearly as attracted to anyone as he was to her that moment. He cleared his throat and with an effort he turned his head from her and glanced into the hall, hoping to break the tension he felt.
"Good, that's good." He said awkwardly, nodding his head to emphasize his point.
Sara's beeper went off then, beckoning her to the garage. She replaced the lid on her plastic container. Grissom moved to stand by the door, still facing her.
"Well, I'm off to process that truck that may have been involved in our homicide. Was there anything else you needed?" she asked, glancing his way.
"No, that's it," he said, stepping aside to make way as she strode to the door.
"Coward," he accused himself in his mind, "Say something, now!"
As she neared him, he caught her scent and his pulse quickened slightly.
Then, as she passed him he heard someone say, "Oh, Sara?" and he realized it was his own voice that had said it.
She stopped and looked at him quizzically, brows raised in acknowledgement.
"What… what is your spider's name? It, uh, takes too long to say "Mexican Redleg" every time," he said, cursing his inability to think of an intelligent sounding stall tactic and feeling infantile. He couldn't think clearly; she was standing less than a foot from him for crying out loud!
She broke into a grin and looked down, it almost looked like she was blushing slightly. He was intrigued by this and watched her intently.
"Well," she started, "see, I didn't want to break the theme you had started. Her name is, um… her name is Red."
"Red?" asked Grissom, his tone both amused and disbelieving. "After going on about my Chilean Rose being named Rose, which is actually a female name, you go and name your Mexican Redleg 'Red'? Are you serious?"
She was still blushing, but she raised her head and said "You started it. Besides, Red just suits her."
He shook his now smiling head, and said affectionately, "You're one of a kind, Sara."
She looked a little unsure of how to respond, and said somewhat hesitantly, "Um, thanks, I think."
He nodded at her and she turned once more and started for the garage, but he stopped her yet again with her name.
"Sara, one more thing..."
She turned her head to look at him over her shoulder.
"What's that?" she asked.
"I, uh, I would sure like to meet Red," he said, floundering a bit for words.
"Oh, did you want me to bring her here?" she asked, looking surprised and turning to fully face him.
"No, uh, I was thinking more of my stopping by your place sometime. That is, if you don't mind, of course," he said, almost cringing as he waited for her answer.
Now she looked confused.
"You stopping by my place?" she repeated, unsure she had heard him right.
"If you don't mind," he reiterated.
She stared at him a moment longer and he was sure she was going to say no, but then she shrugged and said, "Sure, why not?"
"Great," He grinned, "can I come by around nine today?"
Now she looked nothing short of shocked.
"Today? Um, yeah, that'd be just fine," she finally said, a grin spreading across her face and erasing her look of confusion.
"Fine," he said, "maybe we could grab breakfast together?" he was worried that he was pushing his luck, but then, he was in Vegas and you never know when you'll hit a jackpot there.
"I'd like that," she nodded.
"Me too."
"Right, then, I guess I'll see you at nine. I'm just going to go process that truck now," she said, clearing her throat and pointing over her shoulder at the garage, most obviously flustered.
"Sounds good," he said, "sounds really good."
The End
Thanks for reading! I'd really appreciate if you took the time to tell me what you thought of this! The song sung by Frank Sinatra is "I've Got You (Under My Skin)," if you haven't heard it, you really should go listen to it. Oh, and the quote by Shakespeare can be found in Romeo and Juliet (like you didn't know that!)
