CHAPTER 9 – KAIRI PART II

Kairi is content.

Not to be confused with happiness. No, happiness is something that comes and goes. Although Kairi is often happy, there is always that little stream of discontent underneath her happiness. A little uncertainty. A little fear. All mixed together into a brew that's always kept her from truly feeling satisfied.

Not anymore! Kairi keeps her head high as she boldly walks through the castle that she will now proudly claim as her own. Her fear has been quieted. It might still show its head now and again, but for the most part it has been backed into a corner and made to be silent which allows contentment to settle into her like a cool, damp cloth against a burn.

Contentment is harder to grasp. More difficult to maintain. Happiness can be faked too easily. It can often be mistaken for the real thing, even to the person faking it. However, Kairi no longer has to fake a smile when someone comes to her with a request or inquiry. She no longer has to brace herself indefinitely for whatever might be coming because she feels prepared. Strong. Nearly invincible.

(The last time Kairi felt this way was right before walking through the dark portal, expecting Sora and Riku to follow her, embracing the unknown together, only to turn and find the portal closing, leaving the two of them to face Xemnas alone, cutting her from them.)

The memory doesn't have the same sting it usually does. Like previously stated, Kairi is content. It's easier to face things with such a strong base.

And such a solid partner to face it with.

If Kairi's smile is a little brighter when addressing people, Roxas is to be given a fair amount of credit.

(Roxas. Roxas, Roxas, Roxas.)

Kairi is fairly certain she is floating. She isn't sure her feet have touched the ground since he returned from his mission.

Of course, Roxas isn't to be given full credit for her growth since the start of their time together back in Snow White's world. She had to embrace the change on her own, but it was he who put the ideas in her mind and gave her directions to follow. He helped guide her and held her hand through the difficult times. Metaphorically and physically.

Roxas reassuring her that he's sticking by her side then following through with his word. Roxas inquiring about her heart's health in Aurora's world. Roxas protecting her. Roxas fighting with her. Roxas taking lessons for her. Roxas talking with her. Roxas encouraging her. Roxas dancing with her. Roxas holding her close. Roxas reassuring her. Roxas kissing her.

Kairi plucks a flower from a nearby bouquet and takes in its aroma.

The princess of Radiant Garden is sure she would never have been this happy if she and Sora had been together. Well...maybe, but it would not have lasted. Sora would have left for the next mission or had his attention forced away. It's not his fault his heart is too big for its own good. His constant attention elsewhere gave Kairi the impression that she wouldn't receive the amount of affection they would need to keep a relationship going.

Fine by her if it wasn't meant to be, but it's going to be awful telling Sora about her and Roxas. He will be crushed.

(Or not. Kairi thinks maybe she's flattering herself and Sora will just be happy for them and move on quickly. Yeah. That's what will happen. Who cares what Riku said? He's been wrong before.)

"Princess!"

Kairi turns her smile to Teejay who hands her a piece of paper. "Hiya, Teejay. What can I do for you?" (See? No fear.)

"General Corporeal needs your signature on these."

"Thank you." Kairi takes the papers and scans them. Simple requests for a few order changes around the castle's guard schedule. For completely understandable reasons, the General has been quite paranoid about things since the Lieutenant's betrayal.

With a swoop of the pen, the requests turn into orders. Kairi hands the papers back to Teejay. "Please take those back to General Corporeal."

"Yes, princess." The young boy turns to leave.

"Oh, and Teejay!"

He stops and turns to her. "Yeah, princess?"

"Is Roxas with the General?"

"Yep."

Makes sense. He's spent the majority of his time with General Corporeal since he came back. Which is great! The general has told Kairi how pleased he is with her choice in whom to trust. Roxas has proven himself and now has been taken under the older man's wing.

Roxas has confided in her about his lack of interest in quite a few things the others are passionate about. Fighting being the main one. Leadership. Drive in general. But here he is, being instructed in all those things. He's putting so much of himself into it, Kairi's hardly seen him the past few days.

(Kairi tries not to be too hopeful with this. Roxas could most definitely still decide to not live in Radiant Garden, to not stay at the side of a princess when he fully realizes the implications of dating one. But it's so hard because the thought of him being here with her is too tempting not to indulge in.)

"Thank you, Teejay," Kairi dismisses the boy who mock salutes and rushes off. Kairi envies his energy.

The princess continues her day without a hiccup. Well, one hiccup. When it comes time for supper, Roxas has excused himself from eating with everything in order to address something or other with General Corporeal. Kairi eats with the other castle inhabitants.

This is a hiccup not because he missed this meal in particular. It's a hiccup because this is the third meal Roxas has missed since his return. Kairi knows he's busy. Of course he's busy with the work he's suddenly passionate about. But it becomes more of a hiccup when, for the first time since his return from his mission, he's missed combat practice.

Kairi would rather not practice any techniques on her own so she decides to do the dishes. She waves off Abalone's insistence one of his kitchen staff do the chore. Kairi exercises her authority and everyone exits the kitchen, leaving the last duty to her.

Maybe it's a good thing Roxas is busy, Kairi thinks. A little alone time would be good for her as well. Wasn't that what her trip was supposed to be originally? A lone mission for her to get her bearings? She certainly found more than that. She finally found the means to build a foundation.

(...still, the sting of not having seen Roxas all day lingers in her stomach.)

Kairi shakes her head. She's being ridiculous. And clingy. The last thing any boy wants is a clingy girlfriend and she will not be one! Let Roxas have a day to do what he pleases.

"Found an escape, did you?"

Nona settles beside Kairi. She takes the towel from over her shoulder and begins drying the dishes already out of the soapy water.

Kairi smiles. "I did. It feels good to do a mindless chore."

"Why do you think I enjoy my job so much?"

"Oh please. You have plenty to think about," Kairi counters. "For example, anything I do ever. That always seems to be something on your mind."

"Can you blame an old woman for worrying? Your grandmother gave me the responsibility of helping to raise you and I'm doing just that." Something akin to the noise tuff comes from Nona. "I'll stop thinking about your every decision when you're old, married, and have been doing your duty as long as I have been doing mine."

A teacup slips from Kairi's fingers and sloshes back into the water. She picks it back up to find no chips. She grins, thinking of Chip back at the enchanted castle, though it isn't enchanted anymore.

"Maybe I'll reach the point, but you're too much of a grandmother yourself. You take your job almost too seriously."

"I do no such thing! I take it the exact amount of seriousness it needs."

"That's a laugh!" Kairi exclaims, handing her the teacup. "I could practically see the smoke coming out of your ears when you figured out Roxas and I were together. Not to mention you nearly drove Sora mad when he first came here and you figured out I liked him."

Kairi shakes her head. Her smile settles into something calmer. More thoughtful. "I remember you told me once you didn't like him because he thought he already owned the place. What did you mean by that?"

Nona's mirth is toned down as well at this question. "It's exactly as I said. He walked around like he was expecting to be Radiant Garden's next king. Quite a bit of gall that boy had."

Kairi is as surprised at Nona's dislike of Sora as she was the first time she heard her speak ill of him. She also fights her blush upon hearing the king comment. "But he's nothing like—he's not prideful. He's comfortable with things."

It's true. Sora has an unequalled ability to fit in with whomever and wherever he is. Each world he visits he makes friends and always leaves on a good note. Kairi doesn't even think he notices that particular gift of his. It's natural to the point of being unfathomable to him others don't have the same talent.

"He was comfortable with you," Nona points out. "The boy had eyes for you and you alone. He thought that meant this place would be his future."

Kairi blushes at the implications. She still feels something she can only describe as yucky which sticks to her insides when Sora is mentioned with romantic implications towards her. She dreads having to tell him of their final parting. There is no crossing the line again. Roxas is who she wants and who she will work to keep.

Nona stacks the last of the teacups together and starts on the silverware. She meticulously wipes at each tong of the fork in her hand. "I gave the boy a hard time so as to test his character. Even then, he didn't sit well with me."

"Why?" Kairi has to know. It's plagued her long enough.

Nona neatly places the fork in alignment with the spoons and picks up another. "It's a feeling. You get them sometimes, you told me. It's one of those things where something is shifted just slightly, just enough to not be right. Almost, but not. I feel that towards the boy—Sora. He isn't right for this place. Or for you."

A feeling. Kairi's mind immediately digs up the memory of what she had felt when she first had a moment with Roxas. Like Nona put it—something shifted. Only in Roxas and Kairi's case, it shifted into place. Kairi felt it in the core of her heart but didn't realize it went that deep until she had the freedom to explore and indulge in it.

"But Roxas is," Nona adds.

(Kairi's always loved her red hair. However, she hates one key aspect of it. When she blushes, her cheeks match her hair. Because of this, her blush is always more easily noticed.)

Kairi briefly takes her bottom lip between her teeth. "I love him."

She hadn't meant to admit it outright. She hadn't even fully acknowledged it within herself yet, but the second the words tumble from her lips she knows them to be true. And yet she feels the need to explain and defend.

"I don't know...I mean, I hope he might—that it might happen. I mean, it's a huge commitment. It's not just me, it's a whole kingdom, and I don't want him to have regrets. I'd rather he does what makes him happy. If that means going to live somewhere else with—with someone else," Kairi shrugs, "then so be it."

Nona sighs in a content sort of way and nudges Kairi rather hard. "It's going to last, darling. I know this."

"...How?"

"Because you're unsure."

"That makes no sense!"

"Yes it does. You aren't the sure little teen expecting there to be happy endings. You grew up. And your tastes did too. The mature you found a mature match. He seems to have a better head on his shoulders. Calmer. A thinker."

"When did you come to this conclusion?" Kairi asks. "Would you have felt this way about Sora if we had actually been together?"

"No," Nona says firmly. "Sora is an entirely different person."

Kairi wants to comment on how Nona should say that to Roxas (maybe get it further driven into his head) but she'd rather not interrupt with a subject this important.

"Remember the night you two kids came in laughing like two idiots?"

A smile comes unbidden to the princess's face.

"I saw it then. I saw the eventual grown man Roxas could be, bringing you home safely, making you laugh, staying by your side. He can be a rock in ways other cannot be for you. It was then I decided not to be such a presence. Your relationship is your own, and you have my blessing. You and Roxas."

It cannot be helped. Kairi has to hug her stand-in grandmother, her Nona. Soapy water drips down her arms and off her elbows. Nona wraps her own arms around Kairi with the towel still clutched in her hands.

"Thank you," Kairi whispers.

The two women pull away and Nona pats Kairi's cheek lightly. "You were dearly missed, you know. It's good to have you back. Unless...do you feel the need to make another escape?"

A subtle referral to Kairi's previous fleeing. Her midnight meeting with Cinderella. It was Nona who had covered valiantly for her, buying her more time and biting back against the horrified remarks of her friends. They were obviously baffled at the usually protective Nona being completely calm about Kairi's dangerous act. They were unaware of her part in it. She was the only one to see how Kairi's heart was breaking and knew she needed to be removed from the situation for a period of time. Her heart's safety was at stake, not her physical body. Nona allowed her to find another who could help her better than anyone else at the moment.

"Not one bit," Kairi says. (Not an escape. Yet there is one problem she wants to face despite it not really being a problem.)

"But...?" Nona picks up on the hesitation despite the princess's firm words.

"But..." Kairi turns to drain the sink. "But is Roxas wanting an escape? Do you—he's been—distant, you know? Since Naminé and Aqua left, something's been off." Kairi's eyes suddenly go wide. Unadulterated panic flashes through her without warning. "You don't think he—"

"Kairi, you stop right there." Nona grabs one of Kairi's shoulders firmly and points her finger with the other hand. "I've noticed his absence too. Roxas is settling. It's a lot for a young man to take in. You are not what he is doubting. It is his situation that brings worry. Let him have his worry for a while. It will tip in your favor eventually."

"What if it tips the other way?" Kairi asks despite not wanting to voice the words.

Nona lowers her finger. "You said so yourself, you want him to be happy even if it means he will not be happy here. Let him figure it out. However, I've seen the two of you. Things will settle favorably, I am sure." Nona gently strokes Kairi's hair. "Ease your mind, Kairi. You have been doing so well. Do not fall back into that vicious circle."

These are the words that drift through Kairi's mind as she goes through the rest of the night before finally settling in for bed. Roxas is absent. She knocked on his bedroom door with no response which meant he's still out so Kairi goes to bed without her goodnight kiss.

"Roxas is settling," she mumbles into her pillow because sleep isn't coming and her worries won't leave.

He's been staying out later and later, coming back more and more exhausted. All day he spends with General Corporeal. When prompted, Roxas tells her what he's being taught. Valuable lessons are being imparted to him, he says, and he doesn't want to "screw it up". His words exactly, which Kairi completely understands. She knows full well the nasty feeling of having the pressure of others on you. It's a happiness-killer.

No, a contentment-killer.

She wants to be supportive. To be a good girlfriend like he's been a good boyfriend to her. Heck, he's been a great friend. Period. She wants to be that for him. Which is why she takes Nona's advice and forces herself to calm down and accept the fact that though Roxas is not by her side, he is still with her. With her, with her. Kairi's mind drifts to the note as her eyes droop in the anticipation of sleep...

...until she hears light footsteps.

The red-head is out of bed and across the room within a second and a half. Opening the door, she leans out with a large smile plastered on her face. However, this has the opposite intent as Roxas jerks back and his eyes widen.

Kairi giggles. "Scared you, didn't I?"

Roxas does not laugh or scowl. The two extremes are bypassed. Instead he presses a hand to his chest and heaves a breath.

"It's the middle of the night and you decide to scare a guy. Was that on purpose?"

Kairi shrugs while stepping out from her room and up to her boyfriend. "No, but it was a nice bonus." She stops in front of him with the smile still firmly on her face. She can feel her heartbeat turn up just one notch faster. It always does this when around Roxas. Her boyfriend.

(That's not going to get old. Boyfriend.)

Roxas gives her a small smile and shakes his head once. Kairi feels her heart kick up another notch. That is, until the already small smile diminishes in size and his eyebrows come together to create a facial expression akin to worry.

But then it's gone and Roxas reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a flower. It's one of the glowing flowers from the garden, the ones technically against the rules to pick since they're a rare beauty, but Kairi is not about to ban him from doing so, especially when he holds it out to her.

(She bets the smile on her face has turned into one of those gushy ones that Naminé sometimes gets when talking about Riku. She totally can't blame her if this is how she feels.)

"Oh, Roxas..." Kairi takes the shimmering blue blossom. It's light contrasts somewhat in the yellow-toned lights of the castle, but it's a beautiful token nonetheless.

"It's an apology flower," Roxas says, shrugging. "It's a talking apology flower. It says, 'Sorry for being a bad boyfriend lately and not being around enough.'"

"Wow, what an eloquent flower."

"I taught it everything it knows." Roxas is looking at the flower, not her. (That has to change.)

"Do you think I could make it say something? Would it take instruction from me?" Kairi asks.

Roxas grins. "You can try."

Kairi grins right back. She brings the flower up to her mouth, cups her hand beside it and whispers to it. Then she brings it out in front of Roxas. "Can you hear it?"

Roxas tilts his head so the flower is near his ear. "It says, 'How dare you, sucky boyfriend. Shame.'"

What a ridiculous boyfriend she has. Kairi can't help it. She pinches his arm.

"Ouch. What? Like you said, it's an eloquent flower. I heard every word."

Thankfully, Roxas is joking. Kairi can see the crinkles next to his eyes showing his mischief.

"You need to get your hearing checked," Kairi retorts. "It said, 'You are not forgiven because there is nothing to forgive.'"

Roxas shoves his hands in his pockets and finally looks Kairi in the eye. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Nona's words repeat themselves once again through Kairi's mind. "Roxas, it's completely fine. I'm not even mad." (Just lonely.) Kairi crushes the thought before it dare encroach on her time with Roxas. "You're doing amazing work and it takes time. I get it. Of course I miss seeing you more often, but I'm probably being selfish wanting you around all the time."

There's this look that Roxas sometimes gives her. The one he's giving her now which makes her feel like she's something priceless. Like a piece of glass artwork he's been told he's allowed to take out of its display case and keep. Kairi can feel the heat blossoming in her cheeks, and suddenly she feels self-conscious because who can possibly live up to such a look? Yet it also makes her feel bold. She takes a step closer.

Roxas takes the cue. He brings one of his hands to rest on the small of her back and almost imperceptibly inches her closer.

"Believe me, it takes all the effort in the world to fight my selfishness too."

Kairi hums. (She loves it when he's being romantic. Also when he's being funny. And embarrassed, and serious, and...let's just chalk it up to him. She loves him.) "You know, you can give into it every once in a while." She tilts her head up.

Roxas grins and leans in only to stop a breath away from meeting her in the middle. He leans back with that same confused expression on his face only this time there's a little more anger edged to it. The hand not on Kairi's back comes up to scratch the back of his head rather roughly. And when he stops scratching he smacks the back of his head lightly, a hit akin to swatting a fly.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Kairi has noticed him do this before, more often in the past few days.

"Wh—nothing. Nothing really. It's just an itch that won't be scratched for some stupid reason." He looks extra annoyed now. More irritation than confusion at this point.

"Here let me take a look."

"No, it's ok—"

"Too late."

Kairi moves fluidly from his grasp holding her in front of him to standing on her tip-toes behind him. She has her hands in his hair and is moving the strands aside trying to find the source of the irritation. His scalp looks red from the application of his nails but not anything else of note.

"I don't see any—"

Roxas whirls around with the appearance of happiness on his face but with an obvious nonchalant tone he's trying too hard to make work. He wraps his arm around Kairi again and uses his other to capture one of her hands.

"See? Nothing. It's no big deal. Just a scratch. An annoying, unrelenting scratch." At the last words, Roxas's teeth don't part.

Now Kairi's concerned. She places her free hand on his cheek. "Maybe you should talk to Nona. I'm sure she has something to alleviate it. You seem pretty annoyed with it, and I don't want it bugging you all the time. Scratching it will only make it more irritated."

Roxas appears thoughtful while staring at the wall. A small, humorless laugh is accompanied with a shake of his head. "Yes. Yes exactly. I'm ignoring it the best I can."

Kairi shifts her hand to rub soothingly against the back of his head. "Does this hurt?"

Roxas closes his eyes. "Doesn't. Actually, this is the best it's felt all day."

"Good." Kairi continues her ministrations until Roxas relaxes enough to lean his head forward to rest his forehead against hers.

"Thanks," he says, eyes still closed.

"You're welcome."

Roxas leans in and kisses her once, firmly. Kairi lets her stomach flutter (which happens every time they connect this way) and lets her eyes drift close for the duration.

Roxas breaks the kiss only to pull her into a hug. They stay in this way long enough for Kairi's worry to resurface.

"Roxas? Are you sure you're ok?"

His first response is to hug her tighter before completely letting go. The smile on his face appears genuine, and Kairi has no desire to doubt it (despite still doing so).

"I'm fine. It's been a long day and the last thing I needed was that stupid itch, you know?"

"Has the General been working you too hard?" Kairi puts her hands on her hips in a ruse of authority. "Because I'm the princess and can order him to go easy on you."

Roxas chuckles. "Somehow I don't think that will ease up my workload."

The two share a small laugh before Roxas kisses her cheek then heads walks over to his door. "Goodnight, Kairi. I'll see you tomorrow."

His words make her chest seize. (For some reason, she doesn't believe them.) "Roxas!"

Roxas jerks back, looking curiously at her over his shoulder. He raises an eyebrow.

Kairi swallows her feeling of foolishness for her exclamation and forces herself to speak. "You know that if something is bothering you, you can talk to me, right?"

Roxas raises a hand half-high. "I know. Thanks. Same here."

And with that, they go their separate ways. Sleep keeps itself from Kairi for at least another hour, though, as her mind sifts between Nona's comforting words and yet another night Roxas has decided not to jump onto her balcony.

(He hasn't once since he came back from the North Post.)

But she won't let this get to her. Nope. This is Roxas, the boy her heart's been whispering for her to be with since it decided on its connection a little over two years ago.


And Kairi doesn't let it get to her...for another half a day.

Because she misses Roxas in the morning. He gets up before her which is odd because usually it's the other way around but apparently it's reversal week for them. Instead of Kairi being insanely busy, it's Roxas. Instead of Kairi being highly sought after, it's Roxas. Instead of Kairi trying to make time for Roxas, Roxas is trying to make time for Kairi.

(At least, that's what she tells herself. She's hardly seen him so he's either very unsuccessful at finding said free time or...he isn't trying.)

Kairi decides to be proactive and try to find time for him and seek him out. She succeeds once or twice and Roxas seems pleased upon her arrival—the first two times. The third time within the next few days she manages to snag five minutes of his time, he is less than pleased. He doesn't say anything of the kind nor does his body language tell her to leave. No it's—it's something like a discomfort in his air, like he's waiting for her to leave, like he's uncomfortable with her presence.

It may or may not have cracked Kairi's heart. It's not broken, but she certainly felt the little fissures making tiny paths in her heart.

Of course, she tries driving her mind from the worst case scenario thoughts. (No, he is not breaking up with her. No, he does not hate her. No, he is not going to leave her. He's not.) She brings forth more likely reasons for his distance. Perhaps he's tired of following her and likes the change of pace. Or he's working through a case with General Corporeal again and his mind is otherwise occupied. Maybe they've stayed too long and he's becoming irked with the place.

(The last thought does nothing to calm Kairi's fear.)

But his discomfort becomes more and more obvious and even borders on exasperation, and Kairi almost finds herself reluctant by the fourth day to even try and seek him out because she would prefer not to be on the receiving end of it.

Kairi works really, really hard at not blaming herself or her kingdom for Roxas's worsening mood. There are a million logical reasons for him not wanting to be near her for a while. A million.

(And yet not one of those logical reasons comes to mind anymore. Only the terrible extremes.)

Lunch on the fourth day of this, over a two weeks since he came back from the North Post, while sitting alone eating her simple lunch, Kairi decides no more of this. She has gone passed the Giving Him Space stage. He passed that stage himself when he refused to have lunch with her today and gave no clear-cut reason why, stuttering out a pathetically phrased "I'm busy" answer, the twelfth pathetic excuse he's given her that she's sick of swallowing as the truth. It's not the truth and they both know it.

Her fear of losing him over whatever he is going through right now is quickly being bypassed by the fear of losing him over doing nothing to try and fix whatever's happening.

So Kairi takes inventory of what odd behavior's he's been showing (showing extra attention to the back of his head, not finishing his thoughts, that look of confusion making a more common appearance, etc.), puts on one of her more casual/fun outfits (her favorite pink one to give her more confidence), and speaks to General Corporeal about releasing Roxas from his duties that night so she might discuss "business" with him.

Kairi tells herself not to worry when General Corporeal agrees with her made-up excuse of talking to Roxas about overworking himself. Apparently, the General has been finding him sleeping in odd places, and when he wakes him, he always jerks awake as if from a nightmare. (Kairi adds this to the list of odd behaviors.)

The General's words lead Kairi to believe Roxas is working himself to avoid something. Possibly her. Possibly something else. Kairi swallows her worry about it possibly being her and decides to focus solely on fixing whatever problem her friend is facing. Because they are first and foremost friends. Always will be. It's the basis of their relationship, and Kairi will not allow her friend to succumb to whatever is troubling him.

(Even if it means she cannot help him face it as his girlfriend.)

She has Roxas to thank for that. Kairi truly believes she is growing past her fear of being alone. (Somewhat. Tiny bit by tiny bit.) It's thanks to his presence and his confidence in her helping to make her confident in herself and her ability to maintain her friendships despite the hardships of being a princess and not seeing her friends continuously.

She wants to return the favor in any way she can. (She really hopes she can.)


"Ta-da!" Kairi stretches out her arm to show Roxas the picnic she had set up for the evening. It's in a sunny spot near the tree she has marked as their tree in her mind. A large red blanket and two pillows are settled on the ground, and a basket sits in the middle. Kairi drags Roxas towards it. He allows himself to be dragged.

"I made a picnic. Nona helped," Kairi coughs. "A lot. But I picked out the food and got everything else. Hope you're hungry."

"Starving," Roxas says.

(Yet another odd thing. He hasn't been speaking much. He wasn't a speech-maker before this all happened, but it's become the bare minimum now.)

"Good." Kairi seats herself and begins pulling out the contents of the basket. Sandwiches, fruit, and little cakes for dessert. "I packed two of everything. Four of the little cakes, but what Nona doesn't know won't hurt her. Did you have anything for lunch?"

"No." Roxas ducks his head sheepishly.

"Roxas," Kairi half-whines, half-chastises. "What has General Corporeal got you doing that keeps you from food?"

Roxas shrugs. (He's been doing that a lot lately. More so than usual. Another thing on the list.) "There's a lot to do." He nibbles on a few of the berries.

Kairi is three large bites into her sandwich. "Like what? I'm curious. I haven't gotten a chance to really sit down with you or the general lately. Anything I'm missing?"

Kairi hopes her prying is gentle. Subtle. Nothing obvious where Roxas might clam up. Unfortunately, even the subtlety gets no results.

"Organizing stuff, teaching me more about the ways of the military, training—"

"You've been training?"

"Yeah. I'm pretty sore. What?"

Kairi hadn't meant for the hurt to show on her face, but...he's been training without her? "You've been training without me?"

"It's a little different," Roxas explains. "Military stuff, like I said. Not like what we do."

The sandwich is set down. Kairi picks up an apple and fiddles with it while willing the hurt to go away. "Sure."

Awkward. Awkwardness hasn't been a part of their relationship for quite a while. However, now it settles itself heavily upon them, stifling them like humidity saturating the air.

The pretense isn't working. Kairi wanted to try and see if the picnic would help the conversation by giving them something to do during the discomfort. It's proven futile if this moment is anything to go by.

Kairi's shoulders slouch forward. She lifts her head enough to look at Roxas. He's stopped eating and is looking in the distance somewhere to the left. His gaze is unfocused. Nothing in particular has caught his eye—he just doesn't want to look at her.

That stings enough to prompt Kairi's voice.

"Roxas, remember a few nights ago when you said I could come to you with anything?"

Roxas's head doesn't turn but his eyes do dart her way. "I remember. What's up?"

(He barely looked at her.) "Roxas, look at me."

His head tilts marginally more in her direction. "What's bothering you?"

"You are."

Wow. Those words came out way more accusing than she intended. Kairi breathes in through her nose and makes herself calm down.

"I didn't...I meant that you've been distant lately. I know you said you've been busy..." Kairi pauses. "Remember when we were at Aurora's castle?"

Roxas says nothing. Only stares.

"You came to me after Aurora talked to you because you had heard something might be wrong with me. You wanted to help out however you could. You said I could trust you, and I told you that you could trust me back. I don't know about you, but I'm sticking to that." Kairi feels her eyes prickle but with no real need to cry. Emotion is trickling past her well-built walls. "We had a pretty good conversation then. It was the start of a really good relationship, I thought. And I thought you thought that too."

Kairi pauses again, wondering if Roxas will say anything. He doesn't. Instead of bringing out more emotion, the lack of response simply makes Kairi forge onward. The fears she dreaded the past two weeks finally pass her lips.

"This is something good Roxas. What we have going is something I really want for us. But we aren't going to succeed if both of us aren't in it. If you aren't in it, you need to tell me. I won't be mad. You can't help it if it hurts either of us, but if you're honest, that will save us more pain than if you keep it to yourself. Whatever doubts there are, you need to tell—"

"No!"

Roxas's outburst is accompanied by action. He springs to his feet and staggers back a few steps off the blanket and onto the cooling grass. The sun has begun to set and his blonde hair reflects the light beautifully. He would be a more beautiful sight without the anger-agony mix tainting his face. Both hands are clutching the back of his head and his eyes are screwed shut.

"Roxas!" Kairi rushes to stand in front of him. This only succeeds in making him back away further despite him not actually seeing her. It's like he can sense her presence and cannot stand to be near. Kairi keeps herself a few paces away from him despite dying to help him—hold him—anything. "What is it? What—is it the back of your head? Did you hurt it? Are you hurt? Roxas, talk to me!"

Roxas shakes his head several times with his hands still twisted in his hair until finally his eyes fly open. "Why don't we talk about Ansem?"

Kairi is dumbstruck. So much in fact that it takes her a moment to answer because her mind went completely blank from the unexpected question. "Ansem? We...he was defeated—"

"No, Ansem the Wise. The guy who ruled here before."

Kairi cocks an eyebrow. "Did—Did you want to visit the memorial? I'm sorry, I didn't realize you wanted to. I thought you didn't want to."

"I didn't. I don't. I won't. But why don't you talk about him? He was an influence before." Roxas's hands have finally lowered, yet he's blinking rapidly like he can't quite focus his vision. "Isn't it...why haven't you shown me his stuff?"

"His stuff?"

"His stuff! His stuff! Like the stuff he used to research hearts. His lab. He was a big freaking deal to this place and you've said absolutely nothing about it. You're keeping things from me still."

"I am not!" Kairi feels the childish urge to stamp her foot. She settles for clenching her fists. "You know as much as anyone else. His lab was stripped for parts and his research given to Yensid. There was nothing to talk about with him except the memorial for his work on the edge of town. He did good for this place, but he did no good to you. I didn't bring you there because I know how you feel about him."

Roxas smacks the back of his head. Once. Hard. Kairi winces.

"Is that what's—?"

"Naminé," Roxas mumbles.

"Naminé." Kairi tries to calm herself. His anxiety is invoking her anxiety. "What about her?"

"She said—she said I—she said she felt what you felt."

Kairi nods slowly. Remaining calm is imperative in this situation. She hadn't expected an outburst like this. Now in the middle of it, Kairi tries appealing to his rationale. "Yes, she did. She had a flash and briefly experienced what I felt for you."

"She said..." Roxas's head snaps in Kairi's direction and she feels momentarily paralyzed by the intensity of his eyes. "She felt what you felt. She said I could maybe feel what Sora feels. She said Sora."

"Yes, that's true, but it was only a brief—"

"I didn't feel anything that Sora felt that I know of." Roxas eyes turn downward. His brow wrinkles in determined concentration. "I can't once think of feeling anything like that since separating from him. But what if—what if it was slow? What if ours grew over time?"

Kairi gives a shake of her head. "I don't understand, Roxas."

"What if it grew over time, Kairi?" Roxas lifts his hands and stares at them like they hold the answer. "What if my heart is more like his heart than we thought? If Naminé can make contact with yours after everything, what does that mean for my heart? Sora loves you. He's loved you forever. I know. I've been in his heart—been a part of it!"

Kairi stops breathing. She can't feel anything but her heart pounding in her chest. The vicious hurt that came on unexpectedly at the words' release stops her thoughts and making her vision go white around the edges.

(No. No, Roxas, no. Please don't. Don't say what I think you're going to. Please, Roxas. Anything but—)

"What if our hearts are—are wired like this? What if I only ever see you as the original and are drawn to you and you only ever see me as an easy-access Sora? What if that connection you felt was your heart saying that mine is like Sora's and that's why you thought there's a connection when there really isn't one?"

Kairi says nothing. Does nothing. She stares. That's all she does in response to Roxas's question. Her expression is blank. It betrays nothing of what is going on in her mind.

Her unnatural calm seems to affect Roxas. His posture straightens, and he steadies his gaze on her. "What if my feelings for you are just left over from Sora?" he near whispers. "I already got skills from him. What—What if how I feel about you isn't mine?"

And with that Kairi's promise not to be angry vanishes.

"You too, huh?" Kairi says far too casually. She doesn't even bother to hear a response from Roxas. "You think you're just a shadow too. I get it, I suppose. You've been struggling with being in Sora's shadow. I really thought we had made progress, yet here you are, ripping my heart out to justify your ignoring me for days, not being strong enough to face me and tell me outright you don't want to be in this relationship anymore."

"I—wha—I never—"

"Well guess what. Us supposed somebodies—" Kairi spits out the horrid-tasting word, "—haven't had the greatest time either. You never thought it hurt me too? It does. You aren't there when—when Xion looks at me. She looks at me like she wants to kill me, like I ruined her life or something. There's...there's so much hate there I don't know what to do. She doesn't think I notice, but I do. I've noticed since the beginning. But I can't seem to get on her good side. It's like being who I am is wrong because she probably thinks that I think who she is is wrong which is wrong. She's my friend! I want to be her friend. I keep trying and she keeps shoving me away."

Kairi isn't even looking at Roxas at this point. She's pacing back and forth with one hand on her hip and the other gesturing.

"And Naminé does those—she sighs. She's one of my best friends and she does this thing where I know she thinks I'm like this beautiful 'original' or something. Like she isn't good enough when she is. She's her own person! Xion is too! I didn't ask for them to be modeled after me. I didn't do it. I've been trying so hard to—t-t-to get them to," Kairi chokes on a sob as she fights her angry tears, "to see themselves as their own people. I've got—I'm not them. They aren't me. I don't know what else to do to get it through to them—or to you. I can't take it when they—when you—when...I can't..."

Kairi has no idea how to contain this massive amount of sheer disappointment. "They don't want me around. I remind them of their origins. They don't like to be reminded. I'm a bad memory."

"Kairi—"

"Don't touch me." Kairi moves away from him in mirror of his earlier actions. "Don't you dare. You left me. You don't get to touch me."

When Kairi says this, Roxas stands ramrod straight. His eyes are no longer wild. They're terrified. Concerned. Pained.

"I haven't," he says, his voice wavering. "Kairi, I'm—"

"If you didn't want to live here, you could have just said something," Kairi barks at him. "And if you didn't want to be with me, you could have told me instead of ignoring me."

Kairi walks towards him. Roxas raises his arms halfway most likely with the improbable thought that Kairi is going to embrace him. She most certainly does not. She bumps his shoulder with as much force as she can with her own as she stalks by.

"Don't follow me," she says with absolutely no knowledge of whether or not he was planning anything of the kind.

The princess keeps her head high and her shoulders back. She goes around the castle to better avoid an encounter with any of its occupants, Nona especially. The guards she bypasses try to wave. She makes a mental note to apologize later for ignoring their kind gestures, but if she even attempts a smile, her face is going to crack and it's going to look like she's threatening them with how she bares her teeth.

As she walks, Kairi's eyes actually dry out. She feels less hurt and more cross. She doesn't fight it. She encourages it, feeding her ill will the angry thoughts and jilted emotions. The fear of being alone transforms into furious acceptance. Roxas doesn't want to be with her? Her friends won't visit her? She'll be left on her own? Well, good riddance. Who needs them? Certainly not her. Kairi is a princess, a stronghold for her people. She can stand alone. She's done it before, only this time she won't wait around hoping for her friends' presence. She'll be her own support.

"Never enough. No one will ever be enough."

Cold whispers.

Kairi knows those whispers.

The cold accompanying the whispers is not a chill of the skin but a bite of hopelessness. It curves around the back of her heart, searching for an entrance. Kairi stops dead in her tracks. Swallowed in her thoughts, Kairi had not realized she is within the Great Maw until she's smack in the middle of it with the evening light quickly disappearing behind the large cliff sides. But that is not the darkness she feels creeping up to her. The darkness she feels is making its way through her negative emotions, finding her weakness. It both threatens and promises to pull her down...down...down...

"Always alone. Always will be. Alienated those most important."

Slowly she moves her head until it's enough to look over her shoulder. Two large, yellow eyes watch her from several paces away.

The source of the same tickling at the back of her neck when she was leaving Snow White's world. The same creature that descended upon her and Roxas in Agrabah. The thing responsible for offering a dark alternative to all her ill thoughts.

The dark, shifting mass remains in its spot, simply watching. Kairi turns until she faces it and glares.

"I know what you want," she says after a time, neither having moved yet. "You're following me so you can wait and see when I'll slip. You want a pure heart to add to your collection just like all the other heartless. Well tough luck. Even feeling like this I'm not giving you anything. I'll find my happily ever after, and you'll go crawling back to your hole still hungry for light."

Upon Kairi's last word, the heartless changes itself from seemingly formless to something akin to an arrow, its whole body pointing in her direction, even solidifying.

"Roxas is gone."

Kairi summons her keyblade when she hears this. Instead of taking her usual fighting stance, she points it directly at the mass in mirror of its action.

"You chose a bad time to try pick a fight again. This isn't like Wonderland. You can't psych me out this time. I promise you whatever distress I feel is not enough to surrender my heart without a fight. Even alone, I'll go until my last breath."

Now Kairi takes her fighting stance.

"Do your worst. It can't be anything beyond what I've already felt."

The shadow rushes forward. Kairi strikes but at the last second it evades her, swirls around, and comes to a stop about the same distance away it was before it attacked. It rushes once more and once again Kairi attempts to get a hit. After avoiding her third attack, Kairi nearly growls with anger.

"Hey! Coward! Actually fight me!"

Her goading seems to do something because the creature melts itself into the ground. She can hardly see it now. The daylight is nearly gone. The pale hue of the sky is quickly giving way to inky black. She circles around herself to try and find what's been hidden, but she can't see anything.

Then it rushes her from below and Kairi is lifted into the air. She shrieks more from surprise than anger now. Being off the ground against her will throws off her balance.

"Roxas is gone." The whispered words sting more than before because now Kairi is enveloped. Instead of them being in the back of her head, she feels surrounded by them. "Connection forever broken."

She twists midair to try and swing her keyblade at the darkness keeping her momentarily afloat. It shifts to avoid and drops her. She hits the ground hard, and it nearly knocks all the air from her lungs.

Pointing her keyblade, she gasps out, "Fire."

The ball of flames momentarily lights up the creature. Its yellow eyes dead to the world yet focused solely on her.

"Gone and alone. Gone and alone."

(Maybe it's right. Maybe severing ties with Roxas means she won't ever be near the others again. That's it. It's over.)

"It doesn't matter!" Kairi shouts once her lungs refill. She can feel the tingling of the darkness gaining a foothold in her thoughts. "I can stand on my own two feet."

The shadow circles her quickly. It only picks up speed as it continues. "Gone and alone. Gone and alone," the chant continues.

By now, there is no light in the sky but the stars and a sliver of the moon. The lack of sight only makes the circling darkness more intimidating. It's unseen yet felt on every level. Swallowing her rising fear is proving almost impossible.

"Gone and alone."

It's right, Kairi can't help thinking. She's going to be alone in the big castle. All her closest friends abandoning her, especially after they hear she hurt Roxas. She takes full blame. She hates herself. Why did she think she was worth anyone's time? She's not even worth Riku and Sora telling her the truth of their whereabouts.

Kairi places a hand on her throat. She tries swallowing again but it's as if the darkness is not only sucking the light away but also the air. Her head swirls, making it hard to focus.

(Alone forever, unable to see anyone she loves. Never to make new close friendships. Who else could go through what she and the others have and create such a bond? She thought the bond unbreakable, but now...yes, she will forever be alone.)

"Gone and alone."

"She is not alone!"

A slash of light, the sound of a grunt, and then Kairi can breathe again. She gasps for air. Her keyblade is still clutched in one hand and her other cradling her spinning mind.

"Roxas," Kairi gasps. With her first full breath, relief comes with it. Relief of knowing he's there despite their previous words.

"Stay the hell away from her," Roxas snarls. He's not even looking at Kairi. His sole focus is on trying to land a hit. The creature keeps its avoidance tactic much like it did with Kairi. Roxas is relentless, however. Wherever the shadow goes, he follows with a vengeance.

"Not enough. Never enough. Not for her."

Those whispers. They aren't for her. Kairi has finally regained her senses. Those last phrases, they were for Roxas's ears, she just overheard them.

Stony realization seizes her heart.

"Shut up!" Roxas snaps. "Just shut up! You don't know anything."

"Roxas is more than enough!" Kairi shouts, finding her voice. She also finds her strength. She cuts off where Roxas has been chasing the shadow. It sees this, though, and melts into the ground once more. Roxas almost overshoots his momentum, but Kairi links her arm with one of his and they spin to a stop. Back to back, they wait for an attack.

"The ground—" Kairi barely gets out before both keyblade wielders are thrown high.

"Knockoff. Knockoff heart."

"That's not even close to the truth." Kairi's bitter anger turns righteous. How dare this thing say such slanderous things about Roxas.

"Thunder," Roxas says, and the world quakes around them. It also shakes the shadow which rattles and drops them.

Instead of looking for the shadow, which she senses might be circling at this point despite not seeing it, Kairi turns to Roxas and grabs his upper arm. He half turns, eyes intensely focused thanks to adrenaline and looming threat. She can see it even in the barely-there light of the moon.

"Your heart is as real as anyone's," Kairi says, nearly shouting. It's like the darkness is booming in her ears. She needs to make sure Roxas hears her through it. "You're more than enough. You're Roxas, the one and only. You're only yourself."

Roxas presses his forehead against hers. It's a harsh action in this pressing time. He uses too much pressure, hurting where their heads connect, but it's still contact, something they both need.

"And you're not alone," Roxas says. "You're never going to be alone. Not while I'm alive and breathing. I'll always be here."

Because he's saying them, because the relief she felt earlier when he arrived, because she can feel hope after her desperation, Kairi believes him wholeheartedly. She does not brush off his words this time and no longer gives any food to the thought of him feeling trapped here. She's here, therefore, he's happy. And he's here, therefore, she's content.

And then it's quiet. Not the dreaded quiet promising threat. It's the peaceful quite of a calm evening.


Hours.

Hours.

Hours and hours of discussion.

The sensation of it in Snow White's woods. Agrabah's first physical sighting of the creature. When Roxas was first aware of it (Agrabah). When Kairi was first aware of it (Snow White's wood but had a feeling earlier than that). Why they kept it from one another (did NOT want to ruin the trip, neither of them). What exactly happened in the woods of Wonderland. Speculation on why they didn't sense much, if at all, when visiting Aurora or Belle or Cinderella (only accesses certain worlds? can only travel when circumstances are right? fearful around big groups?).

And how they're handling it now.

"So…that's why you were acting so weird," Kairi says. She reviews Roxas's words. His explanation of the crippling uncertainty that stemmed from the disgraced prisoner's words. Somehow, it dug up the deeply hidden insecurity of Roxas being a constant second-choice. He hadn't started hearing whispers until the morning after that interaction in the dungeon. Before then, it had been a simple sensation. But somehow it manifested into fear. Likely the heartless's doing.

She had confirmed that it was similar for her. However, it had been an ongoing problem for her outside of this trip. It started as a sensation in the back of hear mind then crept forward until it was front and center. It festered. It grew. It overtook.

But now it's gone.

"I'm—"

"I swear, Roxas, if you say sorry one more time, I'm going to slug you."

Roxas closes his mouth. He picks at a bit of blanket. Kairi watches him. A small breeze raises bumps on Kairi's skin. She wraps her own blanket tighter around herself. Leaving isn't an option right now. The balcony provides the solitude needed for this difficult conversation.

"Have I mentioned I'm sorry?" Kairi asks.

"Only about four times. Five now."

When he looks up, his eyes are softer than they were a few minutes ago.

The guilt is still overwhelming. "I should have mentioned it way back before we took the trip," Kairi admits as well, even as Roxas shakes his head, not wanting to hear it. "I think the shadow thing rubbed off on you. It's probably because you've been around me so much. It picked up on your heart too and dug at your weaknesses. It isn't after you, though. It's after me. You sure you don't feeling anything anymore, its presence?"

"It's not your fault," Roxas insists. "And I feel nothing. Honest. Nothing making my head itch. No fear. I'm fine. It disappeared like the heartless did earlier today—yesterday. It's morning, I guess. You sure it's gone for you?"

"Nothing right now, like you." Kairi hates to say the next bit, but she has to. "I can't guarantee it's gone forever. That thing seemed determined."

Roxas sets his jaw and nods once. "We're ready for it this time. We won't let it get the better of us."

"How?"

"By not separating."

Kairi's mouth twists in disapproval without her permission.

Roxas backtracks. '

"I mean—if that's…what you want?"

"Do you want to? Are we still…um." Kairi's frown deepens as she gathers her courage. "I want to. Do you?"

"I do." Roxas's vigorous nodding looks like it hurts. "I do. Kairi, I swear, I didn't—"

Roxas cuts himself off with a frustrated noise. He takes one of her hands and just holds it. He stares at it instead of her for a moment. When his eyes to rise to meet hers, they're scared. "Kairi, I am so sorry for what I said. I don't want it to separate us. If…only if you want to—but I'm in, I am. I just…"

This isn't coming out right. Roxas doesn't want to be some stuttering mess. He wants to show what he can't say. So he stands up.

"Wait here," he tells Kairi's worried eyes.

He doesn't hesitate to brace himself on the balcony railing, this time ignoring Kairi's exclamation of caution, and leaps to his own balcony. A brief time rummaging through his things, and he leaps back to where they have been sitting talking all hours of the night.

"Ok, here's the thing," Roxas reaches a hand into his bag and grabs onto the first one he finds, "I've been kind of thinking of you throughout our visit. Which is probably stating the obvious, but I want to show you how much I've cared and how much I still care."

Roxas pulls out a book first. Upon opening it, a pressed flower falls out. He gingerly picks it up and holds it out to Kairi. "This is a flower I picked at Princess Aurora's palace. It's faded now but it looked like a sunset which reminded me of you. All those sunsets on the beach we would all watch. Your hair would light up like it was on fire. You looked…beyond beautiful."

Kairi's shock is evident on her face. She had been inspecting the flower, but when he spoke his thoughts, she trailed her eyes to him. She opened her mouth.

Roxes brings out the doll next. Kairi takes this and inspects its pale pink dress and straw material.

"This one I bought at one of the village stands when we were celebrating in Adam and Belle's world."

"For obvious reasons?" Kairi asks with a smile, fingering the tiny pink skirt.

Roxas chuckles. "Couldn't help myself. The likeness was uncanny."

Kairi holds up the doll next to her face. "Oh yes, I can see that."

The third item to appear is the purple feather. "I snatched this during the worst tea party ever."

"You mean the best."

"I didn't even get any tea!"

Kairi laughs at Roxas's grouchiness. (Progress. A joke.)

"Yeah, well," Roxas continues, "it's close to the color of your eyes. I can guarantee you all the worlds can be searched and nothing can be found to match the color exactly. You're too unique. Uniquely pretty."

Kairi's cheeks flush deeply. "You—You really thought of this? All these worlds?"

"I'm not done," Roxas states as he pulls out the string of beads. "From Agrabah. I think they'd make a nice necklace for you. Or we could shorten it into two bracelets. It's whatever. Whatever you want with them. I bought them meaning to give them to you."

Kairi takes them and runs her fingers over the smooth pink and red beads. "They're beautiful. Thank you. I think you have the right idea with bracelets."

Roxas's smile is small, but present, much like Kairi's right now. Progress. He pulls out the flower trinket. "I'll tell you a secret; I stole this one." He hands it to her. "It was a part of the decorations at Cinderella's party. I was drunk with happy thoughts from our long chat the night before, and seeing it made me think of you and that it would be pretty in your hair. It's not meant for that, but—repurposing it. Like the beads. It can be done, I think."

Kairi holds it up to her hair, pulling some of the strands back and twirling it around the flower. "I think you're right. What do you think?"

"Beautiful." Roxas eyes are on hers and not the trinket. Kairi notices this and her smile quietly disappears mainly because Roxas isn't smiling anymore. They hold one another's gaze.

Roxas takes a deep breath, in and out. "Kairi, you're…you're the person I need most. You've become—you are…so precious to me. I-I care so deeply for you. I want us to still be together if you'll really forgive—"

The words stop as Kairi embraces him fully. The gifts on the floor, forgotten for a moment as the two focus on each other. Roxas hadn't been sure if a kiss was allowed before, but now it's happening and he tries to pour his regret and hope and affection into it. Kairi holds him as if letting go means losing him forever.

"I need you, Roxas," she says when they break. "I need you not like I can't be alone kind of need you, but I need you like my life would be less amazing without you in it. You're the one I want. I'll always want you—only you."

Roxas takes another deep breath to compose himself because for some reason he feels his eyes prickle. (He'd thought he'd lost her forever.) He shifts himself a little to get his bearings. He moves the backpack to the side (hoping she doesn't pick up on the fact he never showed her what he picked up in Snow White's world. He's not sure why, but he feels that particular one could turn into more). But pushes past the emotion. He's got to say one more thing. "I can't guarantee the thoughts will go away completely. The insecurities. They're always kind of there. If that's something you can't—won't deal with. I get it. I do. I can barely deal with it myself sometimes."

Kairi smiles and shakes her head. She places her hands on either side of his face. "You know what I've decided?"

Roxas, feeling warmer inside and out now that she's near, leans in a little more towards the addicting comfortable aura she always seems to give (also secretly wanting another kiss instead of more words). "What?"

"So what? So what if it's true our hearts are wired with me as an original and you as Sora? Even though I totally believe that's not true and we are our own people, it doesn't change things between us if it is. You aren't Sora. I told you your heart never felt like Sora's. I would hope you see me as someone unique and all my own. I don't want to be Xion or Naminé like they don't want to be me. What I feel for you isn't residual of Sora. That emotion hasn't been attached to Sora for a long time now. Can you keep this mindset with me?"

The half-laugh that comes out of Roxas is completely involuntary. The sheer relief at hearing her words overwhelms him in the best way.

He takes her hands from his face and holds them in his own. "Then," he replies, "I need you to fight against the fear of me leaving you every time I'm out of your sight. I'm not going anywhere, Kairi. I never will. Never."

"I will if you never ignore me ever again."

"Deal."

"Deal."

The strengthening pull guides Roxas and Kairi closer until their lips touch once again, sealing their reunion. The silent moment following this relaxes them.

It's only broken when Kairi leans back with dread on her face.

"What?" Roxas asks.

"I have to think of something to tell Naminé. If she's serious about sensing all my major emotions then she sure felt what I did earlier today. I have to explain why I hated you for a while."

"You think I should think of something to tell Sora?"

Kairi digests the question thoroughly before answering, "No. He…I don't think he's noticed. He would have contacted us if he had any suspicions. And he's on a mission right now. There's plenty that could happen on a mission he could place the blame for anger."

"Yeah, you're probably right." Roxas accepts this (mainly because he's still not feeling too keen on chatting with Sora. What would he say? "Hey, Sora! What's up? That anger you felt? It was Kairi and I breaking up for like, five minutes. Oh, you didn't know we were dating? Whoops!")

Kairi tucks her head in the crook of Roxas's neck. A perfect fit. "I think we need a vacation."

The declaration is not unwelcome on Roxas's end. "A vacation. What did you have in mind?"

Kairi pulls her head up and kisses Roxas's cheek. "I have a couple ideas actually."

Roxas smiles because the eager glint in her eye is back. "I'm up for whatever you've got."


"Naminé?"

Riku appearing in her bedroom doorway isn't a complete surprise. He did mention the last time they talked he might be able to make a trip back to the King's palace. Naminé is being housed here temporarily "until the mission is over", the King said.

But Naminé had been so deep in thought, she hadn't been expecting to be pulled from them. The surprise is a welcome one though. More so than usual.

"Riku!"

If Riku is surprised by Naminé's uncharacteristically enthusiastic greeting, he certainly doesn't show suspicion. Instead, the small grin on his face becomes his show of delight. It only grows as Naminé nearly throws herself at him. With her arms around him she finally (finally) feels fully better. It's as if the earlier sadness she felt melts away. And when he places his strong arms against her, she nearly sheds a tear the feeling is that good.

"It's so good to see you." Naminé takes a deep breath and allows herself further comfort with the familiar scent.

Riku pulls her tighter to him. "It's good to see you too. The mission hasn't been easy. Not seeing you makes it even harder."

Naminé pulls back and looks up. She has always loved how tall her boyfriend is. It's because of this Riku has learned just by the look in her eye when she silently asks for a kiss. This is one of those times.

When their lips connect, Naminé decides not to tell Riku what's been going on. Roxas and Kairi's fight was what had been keeping her mind preoccupied enough to forget her boyfriend's possible arrival. Kairi had not long ago videoed her and told Naminé about her and Roxas's fight. Such a silly thing they fought over, whether or not Roxas wanted to stay with her during her time in Radiant Garden. Kairi didn't want to force him into anything. Well, if Roxas's feelings were anything like the first wave she felt from Kairi, then there is no way Roxas would ever want to leave her side.

This moment with Riku, this beautiful, brief moment, makes Naminé realize she needs to let Roxas and Kairi handle their own relationship. Despite Kairi being her best friend and Riku being her boyfriend, it is not her place to give details of their relationship, or even tell of their relationship's existence. Naminé wouldn't want her relationship privately discussed and dissected either. She will allow Roxas and Kairi work through their rough patches and tell the others when they are ready.

Because right now, it doesn't matter. All that matters to Naminé in this moment is Riku's being here. With her. It's what her heart truly cares about.

All the sadness from earlier has truly melted away.


"Uh, Sora, whatcha doin'?" Goofy asks because his good friend is currently acting like a monkey trying to shake a bug out of his fur.

"I'm trying to shake it off. That's what Donald said to do," Sora says as he wiggles his arms. The wiggling moves into a twisting of his torso then taking turns kicking out each leg.

"That's not what I meant!" Donald exclaims. "In your head. Shake off your anger. They were simple heartless."

"In my head?" Sora pauses briefly before shaking his head as well.

Donald lets out one of his signature outbursts. Goofy takes this as his cue to try and keep peace. "I guess that makes sense. Do ya feel any better?"

"Actually," Sora says, slowing his movements to a stop. He pauses to assess himself. "I'm feeling alright. It went away awhile ago, but I wanted to make sure."

"Do ya think it was…" Goofy turns to Donald.

Donald dons a worried expression. "It could have been the target."

"I don't think so," Sora says. "No whispers. No despair. No wanting-to-give-up. No feeling of failure. The warning signs the King told us about didn't happen. I was just mad. Maybe…maybe that was it? I don't know. That happens sometimes."

Donald crosses his arms. "That's true."

"Ya aren't Donald, but ya do get angry when it's justified," Goofy agrees.

"I think it's the fact that we haven't found a single trace of this thing that I fought extra hard," Sora concludes. "Really, I feel fine. It lasted a second and now I'm back."

"Do you need a break?" Donald asks.

"No way!" Sora declares. But then he thinks about it. "Actual, after we're done checking up on Mulan and Shang, and are done checking the Pride Lands, do you think we could maybe visit Kairi? She's got a super light-sensitive heart. I think she could really help us. I bet she and Roxas are done with their trip by now."

Donald and Goofy's demeanors immediately shift. Shift to mischief, that is.

"Aw, I see what yer plan is," Goofy chuckles.

"You need a break with your princess," Donald teases.

Sora, used to their teasing by this point, stands up straight and declares forcefully, "It's decided then! Two more short trips and to Kairi we go!"


EDIT AS OF 3/14/2021: I am here and haven't forgotten this story which is so near and dear to my heart. I have made changes to after they are attacked so read after that because I think they're important. It sets up the next chapter much better. Sorry for being gone so long, but life is happily settled again and I am ready to rededicate myself to this! I've missed you all and I hope you enjoy! The next chapter may take a while but please know I am working on it.

Who missed me - aka missed the story? I certainly did! I am EXTREMELY SORRY for the SUPER LONG wait for this chapter. The thing is, life is good right now. Guess who fell in love and is getting married?! So life has been hectic in a wonderful way, but this story has always been in the back of my mind. I am determined to finish this thing for you all. If it does end up being a longer wait than originally meant for, I apologize in advance.

I hope you are all being extra safe! This chapter is for all those bored at home, needing a distraction. I hope this distraction is a good one! (Especially considering I didn't reread/edit the last quarter of this-I hope it's not too bad.)