The Daily Prophet

BLACK STILL AT LARGE!

Sirius Black, possibly the most infamous prisoner ever to be held in Azkaban fortress, is still eluding capture, the Ministry of Magic confirmed today.

"We're doing all we can to recapture Black," said the Minister of Magic, Cornelius Fudge, this morning, "and we beg the magical community to remain calm."

Fudge has been criticized by some member of the International Federation of Warlocks for informing the Muggle Prime Minister of the crisis.

"Well, really, I had to, don't you know," said an irritable Fudge. "Black is mad. He's a danger to anyone who crosses him, magic or Muggle. I have the Prime Minister's assurance that he will not breathe a word of Black's true identity to anyone. And let's face it – who'd believe him if he did?"

While Muggles have been told that Black is carrying a gun (a kind of metal wand that Muggles use to kill each other), the magical community lives in fear of a massacre like that of twelve years ago, when Black murdered thirteen people with a single curse.

Remus was growing used to seeing Sirius' face glowering at him from the front page day after day. He always liked to be the center of attention. Suddenly, Remus felt like slapping himself. If only he could think of Sirius Black without arousing any feelings of affection. Remus knew how Sirius had sold James and Lily to Voldemort and he could never forgive him for that. Still, Remus couldn't help but think of Sirius as his brother. At one time, Sirius had been his brother. Sirius was the first to figure out that Remus was a werewolf. Sirius was the one who had come up with the idea to become Animagi to keep Remus company during transformations. Of course, Sirius had also been the one to let Remus' secret slip. Well, not exactly slip. Sirius flat out told Snape how to get into the Whomping Willow. Remus remembered feeling hurt, betrayed, and terrified. Terrified of the thought that he could have killed an innocent student. Granted, Snape had always hated Remus and vice versa, but still. Remus certainly didn't want anyone dead at his hands…paws…whatever. Remus knew that he should still feel betrayed and angry at Sirius for that, as well as the betrayal of James and Lily, and in a way he did. Then again, Remus would give anything if he could prove that it wasn't Sirius. If only he could talk with him.

Why did you do it Sirius?

Remus remembered how Sirius would always try and act so innocent whenever he got caught pulling a prank. He would give any teacher the big, pathetic, puppy dog eyes that he had perfected over the years and claim that "it was an accident." Either that or he would try to pass the blame to someone else. Once he came up with, "The ruler of the plimpies told me to!" Another time it was, "But Professor, Snape wanted that raccoon to wash his hair!" Yet another excuse was, "Merlin came to me in a dream and told me that the teachers lounge needed to cleansed with Flobberworm mucus." He remembered one time he even tried to blame the full moon. Despite himself, Remus chuckled at the memory.

"SIRIUS BLACK!"

A loudly snickering Sirius shook his long, black, locks out his face and looked up. "Yes, Professor?" He tried to give an innocent smile, yet his eyes shone with blatant guilt.

"Would you care to tell me why Mr. Snape just ran out of the class screaming?" Professor McGonagall's eyes flashed in the direction of the four teenage boys seated in the back of her classroom.

"Erm…it would appear that young Snivellus - I mean Severus has misplaced his…" Sirius was overcome with such a strong fit of giggles that he began pounding the desk with his fists and failed to finish his sentence.

"His what, Mr. Black?" Her eyes narrowed.

"What my good fellow Sirius is trying to say is…" James tried, but found Sirius' laughter to be contagious.

"Lupin? Would you like to give it a try?" Professor McGonagall asked sourly.

"Er…I believe that Sirius…er…well, you see…" Remus began, desperately fighting down the laughter that was building up. Professor McGonagall sighed impatiently.

"Pettigrew? Any comments?"

"N-no P-p-professor." He stuttered nervously.

"I see. Perhaps the four of you would like to join me Saturday morning when you once again possess the ability to speak."

"Alright…alright…I think I can talk now." Sirius said, taking deep breaths.

"Well then, Mr. Black…enlighten us."

"It would appear…from what I…er...witnessed…that poor Snivelly's sugar glider was quite keen to escape from being turned into a pot and sought refuge in…" Once again, Sirius' laughter consumed him.

"In…?" Professor McGonagall pressed.

"His trousers!" Sirius finally managed. Every Gryffindor in the class began howling with laughter.

"I see." Professor McGonagall said coldly while Sirius laughed himself to tears. "You wouldn't have any idea as to why his sugar glider behaved in such a manner? Be reminded, Mr. Black, that I do not tolerate lying and you will have lost your house 50 points should you attempt."

"Oh Professor, do you think I would lie to you?" Sirius wiped tears away and tried to look innocent. Professor McGonagall raised an eyebrow. "I may have had something of an influence on that unfortunate small mammal."

"Indeed. Mr. Black, you have detention. 10 points from Gryffindor."

"But Professor, I was under the influence of the full moon! You can't punish me for that!" He protested. James let out a huge guffaw and Remus once again found himself choking down laughter. Professor McGonagall stared blankly at him before returning to her desk.

As soon as class was over, Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter headed to lunch.

"I can't believe you antagonized her for that long." James told Sirius.

"I know! I thought that vein on her forehead was going to explode!" Peter piped up excitedly.

"Ah…Snivellus and the sugar glider…that was a beautiful thing." Sirius adopted a dreamy look.

"It was indeed…" James agreed.

"One thing..." Remus said.

"Yes, dear Remmy?"

"You used my excuse!" Remus said with a grin.

"What do you mean your excuse? You never use that excuse!"

"And now I never will because it's already been used." Remus pretended to pout.

"Aw, poor Remmy. I think I made him cry." Sirius joked.

"Sirius, you're so cruel." James laughed.

"You'll get over it." Sirius said. "Hey look! Snivellus!"

That had been their 4th year. Good times. Remus remembered he and James telling Sirius what a terrible actor he was that very same night after he miraculously weaseled his way out of a week's worth of detentions in Charms class. Remus could scarcely believe the irony of it all. Back when they accused Sirius of being a bad actor, they had absolutely no idea how wonderful an actor he really was. Remus would never have believed Sirius to be the spy. He had secretly always suspected Peter…he wasn't sure why. He knew that he himself wasn't the spy. He would never suspect Sirius. Peter seemed the only one whom Remus could imagine sacrificing his friends for himself. He never said anything to Sirius or James for the sake of not wanting to offend Peter. Now James, Lily, and Peter were dead at Sirius' hands, and all the while, Sirius had played the role of loyal, faithful best friend. He had been an excellent actor indeed.