Tenchi Survivor
Day 14
Jose Philipe Mendola
Morning came one too fast for everyone that day for everyone. None of the survivors had gotten much sleep at all the night before, in fear that the interest in this game was sinking and they could all get banished that morning. Jose did not get too much sleep either obviously. He came running up the next morning, yelling something about guests, camera and videotape. As if to prove a point, Jose pulled an unlabeled black tape out of his pocket.
After spiking it, doing a merry jig, he picked it up, dusted it off and replaced it back in his pocket. A strange kid indeed. Jose excused himself for a short time due to some 'business' he had to take care of. Something about getting a room cleaned up and extracting the smell of patchouli oil and something else.
'Are any of you worried about today's banishment challenge?' Ryoko asked as she clung to Tenchi.
'A little.' Katsuhito admitted 'I'm mainly worried that he'll pull some kind of stunt and sabotage one of us just to see us fail miserably.'
'I hope its not boning fish.' Mihoshi said 'Yuck. Fish guts.' She cringed at the thought of slicing open a fish and having to manually pull out it's insides.
'There's only one thing on this island that Jose wants to bone.' Tenchi said.
Katsuhito and Ryoko laughed.
'I don't get it.' Mihoshi said.
'I say we screw around with Jose's mind.' Ryoko offered 'See how HE likes it.'
'Remember what happened the LAST time we tried offering Mihoshi up as a sacrifice?' Katsuhito asked 'Jose knew that it was too easy, and he lit the gasoline soaked wood. Need I remind you that it was AROUND us?'
'I don't think Mihoshi would have liked that too much.' Mihoshi said.
'So what are we going to do?' Ryoko asked 'Just play along and let Jose pull our strings so we all suffer?'
'That's the jist of it.' Katsuhito replied evenly.
'I figured that out a LONG time ago.' Tenchi said.
'But he can't legally do these things to us.'
'Sure he can.' Tenchi said 'We signed a waiver.'
"Waiver'?' Ryoko repeated.
'A waiver is something you sign saying that you will hold a certain person 'not responsible' for everything that happens to you.' Mihoshi said.
The survivors stared at her.
'Webster's defines 'Waiver' as 'the intentional relinquishment of a right or claim'. By signing that contract, you gave Jose permission to do anything to you.'
'Why can we never ALWAYS expect this out of you?' Katsuhito asked Mihoshi.
'I'm a blond, pop's.' She reminded him.
'Right.' He replied.
'So things could be a lot worse.' Tenchi said 'by right he could marinade us in steak sauce and grill us.' Tenchi looked over at Mihoshi who he thought was not paying attention. She was smearing her arm in a brown liquid. 'What are you doing?'
'Applying my daily steak sauce.' She replied.
'Did Jose tell you to do that?' Katsuhito asked.
'Yup.' She replied.
'Only I'm not sure if he wants to grill her.' Ryoko threw in.
Jose strolled into the survivor's campsite. He was sporting the usual. A Red shirt that had a picture f everyone's favorite The Cheat, a pair of black shorts that ended two inches below his knees and a pair of black sandals. A fashion nightmare.
'Aloha survivors.' Jose said 'I've got some good news and some bad news for you.'
'This is far from a good sign.' Tenchi observed.
'The good news is that a new prize has been issued for winning this contest.'
'I don't remember the first prize we were offered.' Mihoshi said.
'Originally the prize was a working replica of Kaneda's super bike, the red one from Akira, and a month's trip to a private island resort. But as you can see, that does not make much sense.'
'You're telling me.' Katsuhito said.
'So what's the new prize?' Ryoko asked.
'A years trip for two to anywhere in the world.' Jose said.
The survivors stared at Jose.
'And half a million dollars.' Jose added.
More stupefied silence followed.
'Now THAT'S motivation.' Katsuhito finally said.
'Now, I don't want any of you going bonkers over this. In fact, don't even mention it. It will only complicate things and cause mass confusion.'
'So what's the bad news?' Tenchi finally managed to ask.
'Oh, I almost forget.' Jose said 'The bad news.'
Ryoko smacked Tenchi upside the head.
'You HAD to say something.' She hissed.
'Don't worry.' Jose said 'It's just about today's banishment challenge. Real easy.'
'I've heard that before.' Mihoshi said.
'So what have you got today for us?' Katsuhito asked.
Jose pulled a nasty looking .357 Magnum revolver out from under his shirt. The shoulder holster was now empty.
'Russian Roulette.' Jose said.
Tenchi fell over from shock.
'Who's first?' Jose asked.
Ryoko and Katsuhito pointed at each other. Mihoshi, pointed between Katsuhito and Ryoko, but got confused and ended up pointing at her self.
Jose laughed. Quite hard too.
'It's a good thing I like you guys.' Jose said as he holstered his pistol. 'I'm not about to shoot any of you on public access. Now if this were a pay- per-view-' Jose trailed off.
Both Ryoko and Katsuhito forced a chuckle.
'Actually, the real challenge is down the beach. Pick up Tenchi and follow me.'
Katsuhito and Ryoko dragged Tenchi through the sand and they and Mihoshi followed Jose.
'This is getting weird.' Ryoko said.
'No kidding.' Katsuhito replied 'It's been almost 10 minutes and Jose has yet to make a pass at Mihoshi.'
'I was taking about the fact that Jose is starting to get more and more dangerous about his jokes.'
'Oh.' Katsuhito replied.
Jose led the survivors to a secluded part of the beach. By the time he had reached this stretch of sand and water, Tenchi had regained full consciousness.
On the beach, Jose had already had a small setup. There was a cardboard box that had some kind of white body suit, a different covered box that was making strange buzzing noises, and a large jar that had a spoon in it.
'First off,' Jose said 'Does anyone have allergies to ANY types of insects?'
Mihoshi looked around and slowly raised her hand. Jose pointed at her, signaling for a response.
'Butterflies.' She sighed.
'Butterflies?' Jose replied.
'Yeah.' She said sadly 'They are so damn cute, but I start sneezing if one lands on me.'
'She can't even have NORMAL allergies without being blond.' Ryoko pointed out.
Jose laughed his reply.
'Trust me Mihoshi, the last thing you'll have to worry about today is butterflies.'
'Ok then.' She said.
'This is a challenge I like to call 'Bee fast, or Bee banished'. Catchy, huh?'
Was that 'be' or 'bee'?' Ryoko asked.
'Yes.' Jose replied as he held up a jar. 'This is our first step. Form a line and step up.' Jose commanded.
Not trusting Jose with even a spoon, Katsuhito, Ryoko and Tenchi pushed Mihoshi ahead of them. She stumbled a little and looked back at them.
'Excellent.' Jose said 'our first victim. I mean, contestant. Stand here and be still.'
Jose tipped the jar over Mihoshi's head. A thick gold colored substance globbed out. Jose began to spread it on the top of Mihoshi's head.
'What is THAT?' Mihoshi questioned as a gob hit the ground next to her foot.
'Don't ask questions.' Jose said 'Just compete.'
Once Jose was content, he told Mihoshi to stand about 10 feet from the buzzing box. She did so, and Jose called up the next contestant.
Tenchi stepped up.
'Don't move.' HE said as he did the same to Tenchi. More of the thick substance on his head spread out and was then dismissed to stand next to Mihoshi.
'Next.' Jose called.
Katsuhito stepped forward.
'Now just take a little off the top.' Katsuhito joked.
'Shove it.' Jose said 'Stay still and don't talk.'
'What a bastard.' Katsuhito mumbled.
Jose added more of the viscous liquid to Katsuhito's long hair.
'Friggin' hippie.' Jose muttered.
Jose spread the substance through Katsuhito's hair, making sure that he did not miss a spot.
'Is this going to take much longer?' Katsuhito asked 'I want to get this done with.'
'I said shove it!' as he roughly spread the liquid through Katsuhito's hair.
'OW!' Katsuhito shrieked 'Let go of my hair man!'
'Now I have talked to you and talked to you until I'm blue in the face and I'm DONE talking to you!' Jose yelled.
'Good,' Katsuhito said 'Does that mean your done spitting on me too?'
'Shut up, I'm not done talking to you! Now stand up!'
Content with his handiwork, Jose pointed in the direction of the other survivors. Taking the hint, Katsuhito walked over to where Tenchi and Mihoshi were. The box continued to buzz angrily.
Jose looked over to the prep line. Only one person left.
'And last but not least,' Jose announced 'the one and only queen of Sheba. Ryoko, step forward.'
Far from amused, Ryoko walked forward and stood next to Jose.
'Assume the position.' Jose said.
Ryoko slapped him from left to right.
'Not THAT one.' Jose said. 'Lean forward.'
Ryoko, none the remorseful, put her head below the said 'liquid line'. Jose obliged and started applying the viscous liquid to her hair.
'You're all very lucky people.' Jose said.
'How so?' Ryoko demanded.
'Normally, this would cost hundreds anywhere else. Then again, it's never been this dangerous of a stunt.'
'Are you still talking?' Ryoko asked.
'Yes.' Jose said 'Now as I was saying, this stunt has never been done before, mainly because no one but me has access to nuclear radiation.'
'Are you still babbling?' Ryoko asked again.
'Yes.' Jose said dejectedly. No one EVER listens to Jose, let alone understands him.
As Jose was deep in thought, Ryoko stole a taste of the substance that Jose had added to her hair.
'What the hell-?' Ryoko said 'honey?'
Jose looked up as Ryoko stood up. Jose was none too happy that she had dared taste what he was using.
'What's the deal with this?' Ryoko demanded 'Do you have any idea what kind of wildlife this honey is going to attract?'
'I do in fact.' Jose replied 'and I'd appreciate if it you did not call it 'honey'.'
Ryoko looked at him quizzically.
'This is 100% pure Kir-Bee Honey. Grown and harvested in the Mendola backyard. It's 'Honey', not 'honey'.'
'So what exactly do you have planned for us if we have Honey on out heads?' Katsuhito asked.
Te chi looked on for an answer as Mihoshi kept trying to look at the top of her head.
'Part 2 of the challenge,' Jose began 'is this suit I get to wear.'
Jose walked over to his cardboard box and pulled out a white body suit. More or less, it was a painter's suit.
After putting it on and zipping up the front, Jose donned a screen-in hat and a pair of thick gloves.
'I don't like the looks of this.' Ryoko said.
Tenchi nodded in agreement.
'This is a bee suit.' Jose said as he tied up the bottom of his hat screen 'this renders me 99% invincible to any type of bee attack.'
'So you're going to release bees on us?' Mihoshi asked in an alarming tone.
'Not just any bees,' Jose said as he walked over to the buzzing box the survivors were standing next to.
The survivors stepped back as Jose whisked the sheet off the top.
'Radioactively mutated laser bees.' Jose said.
'Killer bees!' Tenchi said enthusiastically.
'K-killer bees?' Katsuhito asked.
'Absolutely Katsuhito, killer bees.' Tenchi replied.
'Well what about them?' Jose asked.
'Did you know that if the current migration route north continues, we will all be dead in three years? Do you want to become a bee's supper? I don't. That is why we must act now. Killer bees must be stopped!'
'Well that seems kind of dangerous,' Mihoshi said 'I mean, killer bees swarming.'
'Bah.' Tenchi said as he blew off the comment 'But the bees are nothing compared to ants. You cannot kill them. They are like sheep. They are going to take over.'
'That's it.' Jose said 'You have all lost it.'
'I never head it.' Mihoshi chimed in.
'The rules are simple.' Jose started 'The super heated bees are released, you have to run and the first to fall due to bees is henceforth banished.'
'We are going to die.' Ryoko said.
'I wouldn't doubt it.' Katsuhito replied.
'Now, if all of you are ready, fall into position and I'll begin with releasing the bees.'
'So what's going to stop the bees once they are released?' Tenchi asked 'I mean, you have a way to call them off, right?'
'In a sense,' Jose said 'but I'm sure exhaustion will kick in before I throw myself in front of the genetically altered bees.'
'Our exhaustion or the bee's exhaustion?' Katsuhito asked.
'I don't know.' Jose grunted. 'Look, just get ready to run. I'm going to open this thing real soon. Any last requests?'
'Yeah.' Mihoshi said 'Don't open the box.'
'Denied.' Jose said as he flipped open the lid.
The survivors bolted at the sight of a cloud, 42000 strong, of superheated bees. The bees caught smell of the Honey and made a bee line (pun intended) for it.
The survivors wheeled for the water.
'The water is off limits!' Jose yelled 'Those who venture in will get speared by US Special Forces Frog Men!'
'I don't believe that!' Katsuhito yelled.
'Your right, I lied.' Jose shouted back 'You'll be shot at with my AR15, complete with Hellfire switch.' As if t proves his point, Jose pulled an assault rifle out of the foliage to his right and loosed a few rounds into the air. The survivors immediately turned from the water.
'They look just like a flock of birds.' Jose marveled as the survivors moved and dodged in the same pattern.
The view of the camera began to withdraw from José.
'Um, Jose?' The cameraman said 'They're, uh-, they're flocking this way.'
'What?' Jose asked as he turned around.
The cameraman dove out of the path of chaos as Jose was trampled by the stampede of the four survivors.
'Ow.' Jose mumbled.
Jose returned to his feet and again watched the survivors torment. AS novel as the idea of bees and Honey was the night before, being trampled was not as humorous.
'Aces.' Jose said as Katsuhito stumbled and fell in the sand. To Jose's dismay, the bees passed right over him, not noticing he was there. "Damn.' Jose said quietly.
The survivors continued to run around in wide circles, still hoping to outrun the bees. The possibility of any normal swarm of angry bees figuring out the pattern of travel had the odds of slim to nil. But these were no ordinary bees.
The swarm of heated bees, all 41999 bees (One dead), stopped as a whole and formed a wall.
The survivors made another lap, and saw what they were heading for. Thinking fast, Katsuhito picked up Tenchi and held him like a riot shield in front of him.
'What are you doing?' Tenchi demanded.
'Surviving.' Katsuhito said.
Using Tenchi as a shield, Katsuhito barreled right through the wall of bees. Ryoko and Mihoshi broke left.
'Oh! Hot mamma!' Katsuhito yelled as he ran right into the wall, disappearing into the black cloud.
'Ye-e-eow!' Tenchi yelled in a familiar voice 'hot bees!'
Mihoshi and Ryoko skidded to a halt to watch the swarm engulf Tenchi and Katsuhito.
'I hate bees!' Katsuhito yelled ''Ow! I'm going to punch you in the face!'
Jose looked quizzically at the swarm.
'Fuck bees!' Katsuhito yelled.
A bee flew backwards out of the cloud, impacting on a tree next to Jose. It had indeed been punched in the face.
'Stupid bees!' Katsuhito yelled 'Take that! And some of this! This one's for your mother!' Katsuhito continued to verbally abuse the bees and punch them.
Possible? No. How this was happening was beyond Jose.
Little by little, the cloud diminished until the bees were either knocked out or had fled the wrath of Katsuhito.
Katsuhito stood panting amid downed insects. He looked around.
'Just like that.' He said.
'Well I'll be damned.' Jose said 'He did it.'
Mihoshi and Ryoko walked over to where Katsuhito stood. Jose went to join them.
On the ground among the bees was Tenchi. Indented on his forehead was the imprint of Katsuhito's knuckle.
'That doesn't count!' Ryoko yelled 'Tenchi fell because Katsuhito knocked him out!'
Mihoshi kneeled down next to Tenchi. She looked over all of his exposed skin.
'You know Katsuhito,' Jose said 'If I can't find a bee sting on this kid, I'll have to rule you off of the island for cheating.'
'Found one.' Mihoshi said, pointing at Tenchi's forehead.
'Mihoshi,' Ryoko said calmly 'this is a fist dent.'
'No, not that.' Mihoshi said I her defense. 'This.'
Katsuhito, Ryoko and Jose walked over and looked down at Tenchi.
There was indeed a bee sting right in the middle of Katsuhito's fist mark.
'Explain what happened here.' Jose said to Katsuhito.
'Well, I was opening up a case of whoop ass, as you may have seen,'
'Indeed.' Jose said.
'So I was punching bees left and right, not really looking, just punching, so I see this one bee land on Tenchi's head. It stung him, and then I punched it, getting revenge for stinging him. It's just too bad that it was still on Tenchi's head when I punched it.'
'So what happened here,' Jose began trying to sum it all up 'Was Tenchi got stung, THEN punched, then fell.'
'Correct.' Katsuhito replied.
'Sounds solid to me.' Mihoshi said.
Jose stood in deep thought.
'The ruling on the field,' Jose finally said 'is that Tenchi was stung then fell. The cause of the fall, bee sting or fist, is not applicable, but it obvious that if the bee had not stung him, he would have stayed up after the knock out blow by Katsuhito. The same rules apply, and Tenchi is banished.'
'Woo-hoo!' Katsuhito and Mihoshi cheered.
'No!' Ryoko yelled. 'Now what am I suppose to do?'
Katsuhito took a step backward and Jose took a step forward.
'And that's the game sport fans.' Jose said as he turned to the survivors. 'Get some sleep kids; it's a big day tomorrow. And with only three of you left, things are going to get interesting.'
As the survivors walked off, Jose turned to the cameraman.
'Get this kid out of here. And be sure it's a boat bound for home too. I don't want another letter saying that another of my contestants has been hijacked by the Chinese Slave Labor Industry again.'
'You got it.' The cameraman replied.
'Oh, I can't wait until this is over.' Jose said 'Just a few more days.'
Tenchi is banished!
End of day 15
Day 14
Jose Philipe Mendola
Morning came one too fast for everyone that day for everyone. None of the survivors had gotten much sleep at all the night before, in fear that the interest in this game was sinking and they could all get banished that morning. Jose did not get too much sleep either obviously. He came running up the next morning, yelling something about guests, camera and videotape. As if to prove a point, Jose pulled an unlabeled black tape out of his pocket.
After spiking it, doing a merry jig, he picked it up, dusted it off and replaced it back in his pocket. A strange kid indeed. Jose excused himself for a short time due to some 'business' he had to take care of. Something about getting a room cleaned up and extracting the smell of patchouli oil and something else.
'Are any of you worried about today's banishment challenge?' Ryoko asked as she clung to Tenchi.
'A little.' Katsuhito admitted 'I'm mainly worried that he'll pull some kind of stunt and sabotage one of us just to see us fail miserably.'
'I hope its not boning fish.' Mihoshi said 'Yuck. Fish guts.' She cringed at the thought of slicing open a fish and having to manually pull out it's insides.
'There's only one thing on this island that Jose wants to bone.' Tenchi said.
Katsuhito and Ryoko laughed.
'I don't get it.' Mihoshi said.
'I say we screw around with Jose's mind.' Ryoko offered 'See how HE likes it.'
'Remember what happened the LAST time we tried offering Mihoshi up as a sacrifice?' Katsuhito asked 'Jose knew that it was too easy, and he lit the gasoline soaked wood. Need I remind you that it was AROUND us?'
'I don't think Mihoshi would have liked that too much.' Mihoshi said.
'So what are we going to do?' Ryoko asked 'Just play along and let Jose pull our strings so we all suffer?'
'That's the jist of it.' Katsuhito replied evenly.
'I figured that out a LONG time ago.' Tenchi said.
'But he can't legally do these things to us.'
'Sure he can.' Tenchi said 'We signed a waiver.'
"Waiver'?' Ryoko repeated.
'A waiver is something you sign saying that you will hold a certain person 'not responsible' for everything that happens to you.' Mihoshi said.
The survivors stared at her.
'Webster's defines 'Waiver' as 'the intentional relinquishment of a right or claim'. By signing that contract, you gave Jose permission to do anything to you.'
'Why can we never ALWAYS expect this out of you?' Katsuhito asked Mihoshi.
'I'm a blond, pop's.' She reminded him.
'Right.' He replied.
'So things could be a lot worse.' Tenchi said 'by right he could marinade us in steak sauce and grill us.' Tenchi looked over at Mihoshi who he thought was not paying attention. She was smearing her arm in a brown liquid. 'What are you doing?'
'Applying my daily steak sauce.' She replied.
'Did Jose tell you to do that?' Katsuhito asked.
'Yup.' She replied.
'Only I'm not sure if he wants to grill her.' Ryoko threw in.
Jose strolled into the survivor's campsite. He was sporting the usual. A Red shirt that had a picture f everyone's favorite The Cheat, a pair of black shorts that ended two inches below his knees and a pair of black sandals. A fashion nightmare.
'Aloha survivors.' Jose said 'I've got some good news and some bad news for you.'
'This is far from a good sign.' Tenchi observed.
'The good news is that a new prize has been issued for winning this contest.'
'I don't remember the first prize we were offered.' Mihoshi said.
'Originally the prize was a working replica of Kaneda's super bike, the red one from Akira, and a month's trip to a private island resort. But as you can see, that does not make much sense.'
'You're telling me.' Katsuhito said.
'So what's the new prize?' Ryoko asked.
'A years trip for two to anywhere in the world.' Jose said.
The survivors stared at Jose.
'And half a million dollars.' Jose added.
More stupefied silence followed.
'Now THAT'S motivation.' Katsuhito finally said.
'Now, I don't want any of you going bonkers over this. In fact, don't even mention it. It will only complicate things and cause mass confusion.'
'So what's the bad news?' Tenchi finally managed to ask.
'Oh, I almost forget.' Jose said 'The bad news.'
Ryoko smacked Tenchi upside the head.
'You HAD to say something.' She hissed.
'Don't worry.' Jose said 'It's just about today's banishment challenge. Real easy.'
'I've heard that before.' Mihoshi said.
'So what have you got today for us?' Katsuhito asked.
Jose pulled a nasty looking .357 Magnum revolver out from under his shirt. The shoulder holster was now empty.
'Russian Roulette.' Jose said.
Tenchi fell over from shock.
'Who's first?' Jose asked.
Ryoko and Katsuhito pointed at each other. Mihoshi, pointed between Katsuhito and Ryoko, but got confused and ended up pointing at her self.
Jose laughed. Quite hard too.
'It's a good thing I like you guys.' Jose said as he holstered his pistol. 'I'm not about to shoot any of you on public access. Now if this were a pay- per-view-' Jose trailed off.
Both Ryoko and Katsuhito forced a chuckle.
'Actually, the real challenge is down the beach. Pick up Tenchi and follow me.'
Katsuhito and Ryoko dragged Tenchi through the sand and they and Mihoshi followed Jose.
'This is getting weird.' Ryoko said.
'No kidding.' Katsuhito replied 'It's been almost 10 minutes and Jose has yet to make a pass at Mihoshi.'
'I was taking about the fact that Jose is starting to get more and more dangerous about his jokes.'
'Oh.' Katsuhito replied.
Jose led the survivors to a secluded part of the beach. By the time he had reached this stretch of sand and water, Tenchi had regained full consciousness.
On the beach, Jose had already had a small setup. There was a cardboard box that had some kind of white body suit, a different covered box that was making strange buzzing noises, and a large jar that had a spoon in it.
'First off,' Jose said 'Does anyone have allergies to ANY types of insects?'
Mihoshi looked around and slowly raised her hand. Jose pointed at her, signaling for a response.
'Butterflies.' She sighed.
'Butterflies?' Jose replied.
'Yeah.' She said sadly 'They are so damn cute, but I start sneezing if one lands on me.'
'She can't even have NORMAL allergies without being blond.' Ryoko pointed out.
Jose laughed his reply.
'Trust me Mihoshi, the last thing you'll have to worry about today is butterflies.'
'Ok then.' She said.
'This is a challenge I like to call 'Bee fast, or Bee banished'. Catchy, huh?'
Was that 'be' or 'bee'?' Ryoko asked.
'Yes.' Jose replied as he held up a jar. 'This is our first step. Form a line and step up.' Jose commanded.
Not trusting Jose with even a spoon, Katsuhito, Ryoko and Tenchi pushed Mihoshi ahead of them. She stumbled a little and looked back at them.
'Excellent.' Jose said 'our first victim. I mean, contestant. Stand here and be still.'
Jose tipped the jar over Mihoshi's head. A thick gold colored substance globbed out. Jose began to spread it on the top of Mihoshi's head.
'What is THAT?' Mihoshi questioned as a gob hit the ground next to her foot.
'Don't ask questions.' Jose said 'Just compete.'
Once Jose was content, he told Mihoshi to stand about 10 feet from the buzzing box. She did so, and Jose called up the next contestant.
Tenchi stepped up.
'Don't move.' HE said as he did the same to Tenchi. More of the thick substance on his head spread out and was then dismissed to stand next to Mihoshi.
'Next.' Jose called.
Katsuhito stepped forward.
'Now just take a little off the top.' Katsuhito joked.
'Shove it.' Jose said 'Stay still and don't talk.'
'What a bastard.' Katsuhito mumbled.
Jose added more of the viscous liquid to Katsuhito's long hair.
'Friggin' hippie.' Jose muttered.
Jose spread the substance through Katsuhito's hair, making sure that he did not miss a spot.
'Is this going to take much longer?' Katsuhito asked 'I want to get this done with.'
'I said shove it!' as he roughly spread the liquid through Katsuhito's hair.
'OW!' Katsuhito shrieked 'Let go of my hair man!'
'Now I have talked to you and talked to you until I'm blue in the face and I'm DONE talking to you!' Jose yelled.
'Good,' Katsuhito said 'Does that mean your done spitting on me too?'
'Shut up, I'm not done talking to you! Now stand up!'
Content with his handiwork, Jose pointed in the direction of the other survivors. Taking the hint, Katsuhito walked over to where Tenchi and Mihoshi were. The box continued to buzz angrily.
Jose looked over to the prep line. Only one person left.
'And last but not least,' Jose announced 'the one and only queen of Sheba. Ryoko, step forward.'
Far from amused, Ryoko walked forward and stood next to Jose.
'Assume the position.' Jose said.
Ryoko slapped him from left to right.
'Not THAT one.' Jose said. 'Lean forward.'
Ryoko, none the remorseful, put her head below the said 'liquid line'. Jose obliged and started applying the viscous liquid to her hair.
'You're all very lucky people.' Jose said.
'How so?' Ryoko demanded.
'Normally, this would cost hundreds anywhere else. Then again, it's never been this dangerous of a stunt.'
'Are you still talking?' Ryoko asked.
'Yes.' Jose said 'Now as I was saying, this stunt has never been done before, mainly because no one but me has access to nuclear radiation.'
'Are you still babbling?' Ryoko asked again.
'Yes.' Jose said dejectedly. No one EVER listens to Jose, let alone understands him.
As Jose was deep in thought, Ryoko stole a taste of the substance that Jose had added to her hair.
'What the hell-?' Ryoko said 'honey?'
Jose looked up as Ryoko stood up. Jose was none too happy that she had dared taste what he was using.
'What's the deal with this?' Ryoko demanded 'Do you have any idea what kind of wildlife this honey is going to attract?'
'I do in fact.' Jose replied 'and I'd appreciate if it you did not call it 'honey'.'
Ryoko looked at him quizzically.
'This is 100% pure Kir-Bee Honey. Grown and harvested in the Mendola backyard. It's 'Honey', not 'honey'.'
'So what exactly do you have planned for us if we have Honey on out heads?' Katsuhito asked.
Te chi looked on for an answer as Mihoshi kept trying to look at the top of her head.
'Part 2 of the challenge,' Jose began 'is this suit I get to wear.'
Jose walked over to his cardboard box and pulled out a white body suit. More or less, it was a painter's suit.
After putting it on and zipping up the front, Jose donned a screen-in hat and a pair of thick gloves.
'I don't like the looks of this.' Ryoko said.
Tenchi nodded in agreement.
'This is a bee suit.' Jose said as he tied up the bottom of his hat screen 'this renders me 99% invincible to any type of bee attack.'
'So you're going to release bees on us?' Mihoshi asked in an alarming tone.
'Not just any bees,' Jose said as he walked over to the buzzing box the survivors were standing next to.
The survivors stepped back as Jose whisked the sheet off the top.
'Radioactively mutated laser bees.' Jose said.
'Killer bees!' Tenchi said enthusiastically.
'K-killer bees?' Katsuhito asked.
'Absolutely Katsuhito, killer bees.' Tenchi replied.
'Well what about them?' Jose asked.
'Did you know that if the current migration route north continues, we will all be dead in three years? Do you want to become a bee's supper? I don't. That is why we must act now. Killer bees must be stopped!'
'Well that seems kind of dangerous,' Mihoshi said 'I mean, killer bees swarming.'
'Bah.' Tenchi said as he blew off the comment 'But the bees are nothing compared to ants. You cannot kill them. They are like sheep. They are going to take over.'
'That's it.' Jose said 'You have all lost it.'
'I never head it.' Mihoshi chimed in.
'The rules are simple.' Jose started 'The super heated bees are released, you have to run and the first to fall due to bees is henceforth banished.'
'We are going to die.' Ryoko said.
'I wouldn't doubt it.' Katsuhito replied.
'Now, if all of you are ready, fall into position and I'll begin with releasing the bees.'
'So what's going to stop the bees once they are released?' Tenchi asked 'I mean, you have a way to call them off, right?'
'In a sense,' Jose said 'but I'm sure exhaustion will kick in before I throw myself in front of the genetically altered bees.'
'Our exhaustion or the bee's exhaustion?' Katsuhito asked.
'I don't know.' Jose grunted. 'Look, just get ready to run. I'm going to open this thing real soon. Any last requests?'
'Yeah.' Mihoshi said 'Don't open the box.'
'Denied.' Jose said as he flipped open the lid.
The survivors bolted at the sight of a cloud, 42000 strong, of superheated bees. The bees caught smell of the Honey and made a bee line (pun intended) for it.
The survivors wheeled for the water.
'The water is off limits!' Jose yelled 'Those who venture in will get speared by US Special Forces Frog Men!'
'I don't believe that!' Katsuhito yelled.
'Your right, I lied.' Jose shouted back 'You'll be shot at with my AR15, complete with Hellfire switch.' As if t proves his point, Jose pulled an assault rifle out of the foliage to his right and loosed a few rounds into the air. The survivors immediately turned from the water.
'They look just like a flock of birds.' Jose marveled as the survivors moved and dodged in the same pattern.
The view of the camera began to withdraw from José.
'Um, Jose?' The cameraman said 'They're, uh-, they're flocking this way.'
'What?' Jose asked as he turned around.
The cameraman dove out of the path of chaos as Jose was trampled by the stampede of the four survivors.
'Ow.' Jose mumbled.
Jose returned to his feet and again watched the survivors torment. AS novel as the idea of bees and Honey was the night before, being trampled was not as humorous.
'Aces.' Jose said as Katsuhito stumbled and fell in the sand. To Jose's dismay, the bees passed right over him, not noticing he was there. "Damn.' Jose said quietly.
The survivors continued to run around in wide circles, still hoping to outrun the bees. The possibility of any normal swarm of angry bees figuring out the pattern of travel had the odds of slim to nil. But these were no ordinary bees.
The swarm of heated bees, all 41999 bees (One dead), stopped as a whole and formed a wall.
The survivors made another lap, and saw what they were heading for. Thinking fast, Katsuhito picked up Tenchi and held him like a riot shield in front of him.
'What are you doing?' Tenchi demanded.
'Surviving.' Katsuhito said.
Using Tenchi as a shield, Katsuhito barreled right through the wall of bees. Ryoko and Mihoshi broke left.
'Oh! Hot mamma!' Katsuhito yelled as he ran right into the wall, disappearing into the black cloud.
'Ye-e-eow!' Tenchi yelled in a familiar voice 'hot bees!'
Mihoshi and Ryoko skidded to a halt to watch the swarm engulf Tenchi and Katsuhito.
'I hate bees!' Katsuhito yelled ''Ow! I'm going to punch you in the face!'
Jose looked quizzically at the swarm.
'Fuck bees!' Katsuhito yelled.
A bee flew backwards out of the cloud, impacting on a tree next to Jose. It had indeed been punched in the face.
'Stupid bees!' Katsuhito yelled 'Take that! And some of this! This one's for your mother!' Katsuhito continued to verbally abuse the bees and punch them.
Possible? No. How this was happening was beyond Jose.
Little by little, the cloud diminished until the bees were either knocked out or had fled the wrath of Katsuhito.
Katsuhito stood panting amid downed insects. He looked around.
'Just like that.' He said.
'Well I'll be damned.' Jose said 'He did it.'
Mihoshi and Ryoko walked over to where Katsuhito stood. Jose went to join them.
On the ground among the bees was Tenchi. Indented on his forehead was the imprint of Katsuhito's knuckle.
'That doesn't count!' Ryoko yelled 'Tenchi fell because Katsuhito knocked him out!'
Mihoshi kneeled down next to Tenchi. She looked over all of his exposed skin.
'You know Katsuhito,' Jose said 'If I can't find a bee sting on this kid, I'll have to rule you off of the island for cheating.'
'Found one.' Mihoshi said, pointing at Tenchi's forehead.
'Mihoshi,' Ryoko said calmly 'this is a fist dent.'
'No, not that.' Mihoshi said I her defense. 'This.'
Katsuhito, Ryoko and Jose walked over and looked down at Tenchi.
There was indeed a bee sting right in the middle of Katsuhito's fist mark.
'Explain what happened here.' Jose said to Katsuhito.
'Well, I was opening up a case of whoop ass, as you may have seen,'
'Indeed.' Jose said.
'So I was punching bees left and right, not really looking, just punching, so I see this one bee land on Tenchi's head. It stung him, and then I punched it, getting revenge for stinging him. It's just too bad that it was still on Tenchi's head when I punched it.'
'So what happened here,' Jose began trying to sum it all up 'Was Tenchi got stung, THEN punched, then fell.'
'Correct.' Katsuhito replied.
'Sounds solid to me.' Mihoshi said.
Jose stood in deep thought.
'The ruling on the field,' Jose finally said 'is that Tenchi was stung then fell. The cause of the fall, bee sting or fist, is not applicable, but it obvious that if the bee had not stung him, he would have stayed up after the knock out blow by Katsuhito. The same rules apply, and Tenchi is banished.'
'Woo-hoo!' Katsuhito and Mihoshi cheered.
'No!' Ryoko yelled. 'Now what am I suppose to do?'
Katsuhito took a step backward and Jose took a step forward.
'And that's the game sport fans.' Jose said as he turned to the survivors. 'Get some sleep kids; it's a big day tomorrow. And with only three of you left, things are going to get interesting.'
As the survivors walked off, Jose turned to the cameraman.
'Get this kid out of here. And be sure it's a boat bound for home too. I don't want another letter saying that another of my contestants has been hijacked by the Chinese Slave Labor Industry again.'
'You got it.' The cameraman replied.
'Oh, I can't wait until this is over.' Jose said 'Just a few more days.'
Tenchi is banished!
End of day 15
