Chapter Five already! Yay! Who knew it would have gone past chapter one. Thanks I love y'all reviewers. Lol.
In sickness or in health
Day… Day… another day without HIM
I refuse to leave my room. Mum brings up a tray of food at night and takes the untouched meal back in the morning. That is how I tell the difference between day and night. My curtains are drawn and I sit on my bed all day.
I listen to music all day to block out the other world. HIS world. I stay away from it. I'm not welcome there anymore.
Hermione has banged on my door endlessly ever since Mum left to go buy something. And then she's spending a couple of nights at Fred and George. She's been constantly banging. BANG BANG BANG! My head is throbbing now. Ow.
She's gone now. Good. She has left me to my doom and misery. Now I will resume my depression.
I haven't shed a tear since I first broke down. I have just been extremely miserable. I haven't changed PJ's since that night. I just sat there. I am pouring all my emotions into this. But on the upside at least it's not talking back. Ok. I'm going back to my miserable sleep.
Later
Dammit Hermione. I turned to my sleep where I could dream of having a nice life with my family and being with Him. But instead as I begin to drift off which is hard enough already Hermione just barges in slamming the door wide open. She is carrying a large bag in her arms and she marches in and places it on my wooden floors.
'Ginerva Molly Weasley. Sit up right now. It is three o'clock in the afternoon. You are not tired and you are NOT going to sleep. Ok?'
Of course in my sleepy state I tell her to do something that I would never have told her any other time. But instead of doing that she sit on my bed and begins fluffing the pillows.
'Er-Mi-neee….' I groan as she lifts me up from my comfortable bed of pain. She then looks around my room taking in the closed windows and curtains and loud, noisy music.
'Hmph.' She says and begins to flick her wand at various things. Suddenly the curtains are open and the music is exchanged with a awful boppy sound, something I might have liked with him. Then she conjures a vase of flowers and places them beside my bed. They are beautiful roses. Red. Symbolisation of love. I felt my eyes well up with tears. I knocked them away and Hermione nods she immediately turns them into beautiful white ones. I let her keep them. She wasn't going to go down without a fight. Once she had tidied my room to her satisfaction she turned to the massive bag at her feet.
She begins to pull a whole assortment of things out of it. First of all there is a massive block of chocolate. I eye that off. Chocolate was good… but when Harry shared it with me though.
'Gin. You can't be depressed when you eat choccie!' Hermione exclaimed.
She then took out a box of pink stuff. I ignored it also ignoring my curiosity. I was depressed remember.
'The wizarding world only has boring black tea. But in the Muggle World we have heaps of different types. I brought a couple for you to have. This is rosehip. And I have peppermint and I think this is… um.. Chai. Indian stuff. Oh. And I was in Australia over the summer and I bought heaps of Milo. Try it ok?'
I ignored it too. Then she pulled out a couple of magazines and a box of tissues. Then she pulled out a couple of pink plastic bags. And a couple more muggle bags. Finally she left the bag. 'Not empty yet.' She informed me, 'But it's a start.'
I eyed the chocolate. 'That's not Honeydukes.' I informed her curiously. 'No. I didn't get a chance to go to any magic sweet shop but I had some muggle stuff left. This is Cadbury's.'
I looked at the strange purple bar and she began unwrapping it. She revealed the creamy looking chocolate. She handed me couple of squares. Being sulky I didn't take them but being Hermione she just shoved in my hand again. I put it down again. So Hermione put them in my mouth. Fine. Mione wins round one. She fixed me a cup of what she called Milo. I gave up. She was there to help. I sipped at it and let the warm chocolaty taste fill my mouth. It was nice. Between the chocolate and the Milo I began to feel better. Hermione looked at me. 'Gin. Look. This is break up bootcamp. Ok. I will get you over this. I know a good replenishing spell. I can refill chocolate boxes and conjure new cups of Muggle tea. I have books and albums. We will get you outta this room.'
We continued to sit and talk about things that didn'thave anything to do with boys. I really liked the drink. Hermione kindly refilled it a couple of times.
When the song ended Hermione said to me, 'Come on. We're going out.'
She took me gently by the hand and led me downstairs. We sat downstairs in the kitchen talking. She talked to me for ages. Then the boys came in from a game of Quidditch. I see him behind Ron and I drop my mug and run up the stairs.
So now I'm back in my room. I'm not ready for that yet. I look at Hermione's carefully chosen items. I begin to root through the magazines. Garbage. Then I turned on another one of Hermione's CD's but going back to my old ways I sat on my bed. I am really confused. Why didn't I talk to him? Maybe because I was in my pyjama's and I hadn't brushed my hair. And look what happened the last time I tried to talk to him. I broke down and I haven't left my room since. NOT NORMAL!
I'm going to try and sleep again.
Good..afternoon.
Ginny.
Couple of days since I last wrote. (which I figured puts it at about day 14)
Hermione has been talking to me everyday now. But today she informs me that she is going on a dtae with Ron. I acted thrilled and helped her get ready and do her hair but behind the smile my heart was being ripped to pieces. I wanted to be able to apparate to som nice little coffee shop with him and just be alone with someone who cares. But instead I get stuck at home to sink lower than I started at. I am just going to sit here.. Wonder if I have any pictures of him.. and maybe a few darts…
Hermione never told me what he was doing. But if he's staying here it won't matter. He won't come here anyway. In fact I'm not feeling that well. Maybe I will just sit in here and calm down. I'm getting to highly strung…
Later,
I'm definitely not well. I have a really high temp. Who do I tell? Mum hasn't come back from Fred and George's and everyone else is out. What does one do? I'll just go downstairs and grab a cold towel or something. Or perhaps I could stay lying here.
Um..
A couple of days further on.
Great here I lie in St Mungo's. Apparently I have some strange virus. I heard Mum talking to Hermione and she said something about sun deprivation. Garbage. I am fine. I just kinda passed out into a coma and then my blood pressure soared. I have only been allowed to have visitors since ten o'clock this morning. Mum came up first. She was distraught. Hermione came next sobbing for leaving me there. When she left I then got Ron and the rest of my brothers in. Bill and Charlie had even apparated in because they heard I was sick. Bill cam striding in with concern all over his face.
'Gin! What happened?'
He sat down on my bed and gave me a hug. Ron never hugged me like that.
'I'm fine.' I insisted. 'I don't know why I have to sit in this hell hole and rot!'
Bill ignored my protests and continued to make sure I was ok.
'I had planned on me and Fleur coming in to see you now that our honeymoon's over. We hadn't expected to have to visit St Mungo's though.'
I shrugged. I hadn't planned on that either.
Bill continued to look worried. He began to look at my health report.
'That's not right.' He mumbled, 'They're treating you for depression too. Draught of Peace. Euphoria. What?'
I shrugged again yet I felt my face go red. I would have to kill Hermione when I got out. Why did she have to tell them. I was fine!
He never visited me though. When I was finally discharged from hospital my mother was loaded with a bunch of potions. I didn't get it. Why did I have to do this? I was fine.
But then something happened that I never knew would happen. I heard Hermione talking to him downstairs but I couldn't make out what they were saying.
A couple of minutes later I heard footsteps hurrying up the stairs. A couple of minutes later a pale form burst into my room. It was him. He had come into MY room. He was breathing heavily, 'Ginny! You're ok! I.. I … I thought..' he trailed off suddenly looing embarrassed.
I didn't say anything. I wanted to though. But I thought about the last time I opened my mouth I wound up in St Mungo's. I just sat there in my bed sipping one of the potions I was now being given. He ran over to my bed urgently. Under his pink tinge of his cheeks he was incredibly pale.
'You had me so.. so.. oh Ginny. I was so worried!'
'But…' I began.
'Shh.' He said quietly. He hesistated before lifting his hands and grasped mine. He patted them gently and held them.
'Your mum said that you were treated for depression!'
I nodded, 'Well yes..'
He looked at me and he began to talk again, 'It- it- it was all my faut!' he cried, his voice breaking. 'I wouldn't talk to you! I didn't help you. All I did was wallow in my own emotions! I let my work come before you.' He bowed his head sadly.
'But I can't let you get hurt!'
'Harry, Please. If you are going to sit here and hold my hands and apologize but then tear yourself away from me again then you can leave my room, right now and I will go find someone else to comfort me.' I said my voice heating up.
'I.. But.. I.. Ginny.. I can't let you get hurt. But I won't ever leave you.'
'Prove it.' I threw back.
He shook his head and I said, 'Harry. You show me now that you still care and that you will never leave me or I will give up. I will turn to the first boy that comes across my path at Hogwarts. I will make sure that you never ever talk to me again.' I threatened.
Harry
stopped. He obviously hadn't planned on me being angry. He stared
at me and then took his hands off mine. He placed them on my cheeks.
He leaned forward and placed his lips on mine. His kiss was like a
breath of fresh air. The first time from the summer when I had
actually relaxed. I held him tightly around the neck.
Finally my
photo album won't be empty anymore.
