The Janitor of Hogwarts

Chapter Eight

"BROTHER?" was the general surprised response of everyone, although Severus was the one who managed to voice this.

"If it's her older brother, we might get our asses kicked."

"I'll get mine kicked too!"

"Aww, I'd never lay a hand on my sister."

"Ooooh, he's kind of cute. Is he a bishie?"

"NO."

"Don't have to be rude.."

"You know, the writer is extremely lazy, and I bet the readers are confused."

"I'm confused too."

"You're always confused. I think it's natural."

Crash.

"OW!"

"Don't say mean things about my baby sister!"

"Bwuahaha, who has power now, biatch."

"When idiots laugh evilly you know it's time to run, fast. And stop checking out Snape's ass, Teava, or do it and keep your thoughts SILENT. Ew."

The still mysterious transportation thing fell into a deathly silent that didn't really fit the usual mood of things, everyone turning to look at Teava. The emotions ranged from sickened to intrigued to really REALLY sickened.

"What? I'm a teenager!" was the feeble excuse she supplied.

Before anyone could reply, the vehicle suddenly lurched to a stop, throwing the occupants around a bit, but they all managed to remained seated for once. It gave a few more violent shakes before coming to a complete stand still. What sounded like a car door slammed sut, and heavy footsteps could be heard outside. They followed the path they could hear whatever force had driven them to Hogwarts make as it made its way to the right side of... whatever the thing they were in was.

The wall disappeared, revealing a disgruntled McGonagall and a short, fat, bald guy wearing a tutu looking completely out of place beside her.

"Hello Severus," McGonagall said coldly. She looked around the compartment with a mixture of awe, before exclaiming, "Who on earth are all of these people?"

The questioned man sighed. Gesturing to each in their turn, he said, "Minerva, this is TeavaRobinMary-Sue-" McGonagall gasped, "-andTea'sbrother. Teava and all you other people, Minerva."

There was more enstranged silence as each group stared at each other, taking all of this in. Teava, of course, had to interrupt this.

"Minerva rhymes with Binerva!" she cried happily, almost... proud of her outburst, like she had said something intelligent.

"Aren't you a brightly lit candestick," McGonagall observed, a look of distain painted across her face. Turning to Snape, she said, "Err, Albus would like to meet you in his office. Go ahead and bring your, uh, friends as well. I'm sure he'd be delighted to meet them too." With that, she turned and vanished from sight.

"I think she likes me," Teava said.

Severus nodded and offered, "Yeah, I'm sure she just loves you to pieces." After effectively rolling his eyes in her direction, the potions master had hopped out of the thing. "Hurry up."

Slowly, everyone else filed out. Severus watched them quietly, amazed at how their little expedition to the school had attracted a bunch of weirdos. He didn't bother wondering HOW it had attracted them, but if he had, the only conclusion he would have been able to make was that weirdos came in packs, and since Teava was the mother of ALL weird things, of course she was going to bring a bunch of others with her eventually.

Once the posse was situated outside the thing, the fat bald guy nodded to Severus, and then proceeded to disappear with a pop. The mysterious vehicle had gone with him.

Everyone was a bit startled by this, and Teava's brother took advantage of it by snapping a sparkley pink collar around his sister's neck, complete with matching pink leach that was securely wrapped around his wrist.

"Pretty!" the strange muggle girl said, giving it a tug. "Thank you Avi!" Yay, now her brother has a name.

"That is sick," Robin gagged, mind obviously on one thing only.

Caz blinked, stating her own opinion: "Kinky."

"In...deed," said Severus, pursing his lips at the exchange. He looked towards the castle. "Now let's get moving."

And they, like, did, I guess.

Up the steep grassy hill, towards the prettiful castle of Hogwarts, through the front door, a few hallways, and after making one pitstop for the bathroom, they finally arrived to the statue of the something that led to Dumbledore's office.

Wow, real eloquent.

"Fuck, what's the password," Severus cursed, somewhat at himself but mostly at McGonagall. That damn wench. He was all set to go off and find the elder proffessor, when the heavens smiled upon him in the form of an idiotic outburst.

"Boogers!" Teava cried.

The statue turned a garish fuchsia color before bursting in a bunch of flowers, revealing a spiraling yellow brick staircase that he hoped lead to Dumbledore and not some emerald city.

Everyone decided it would be best not to ask, and began to ascend the stairs.