CHAPTER 5--When popsicles are gone and the mailman lets you down

THREE HOURS LATER--RANDOM MEETING "Well that was a complete disaster." Shi, Sora, Riku, Kairi, Marluixa, Leon, and Roxas were all watching Shi's mini TV inside one of the gift shops, where Shi had made herself at home. Roxas stuck his hand into his box of all red popsicles and gasped.
"They're gone..." He started sobbing, but no one noticed. Kairi was still brushing dirt and twigs out of her hair. She had gotten away from the fangirls and hid in the woods for 8 hours. She looked at the screen and sighed.
"Sora, I can't believe you set that place on fire"
"I didn't"
"You did." Everyone said at once. Shi pointed to the screen where the news was screaming about an unknown fire phenomenon in Epcot. Sora blinked and stared at the rubble.
"Wow. I guess I did burn it down. Odd, I can't remember"
"OF COURSE YOU CAN'T, YOU WERE DELIRIOUS FROM SUGAR AND SODA INTAKE!" Riku shouted, chucking an empty soda can at him. He grabbed another one and chugged it. Kairi took it from him.
"Riku, you're starting to have mood swings"
"Really?" he asked, suddenly happy. Then he broke down in tears. "I'M SORRY BUT HOW CAN YOU THINK THAT THAT'S SO MEEEEEEEEEEAN!" he kept on crying. Marluxia slapped him.
"Pull yourself together." Leon sighed and turned off Shi's TV. She screamed at him.
"I don't care, I'm going to bed." He left. Riku and Roxas followed closely, too scared to have to go inside the mansion alone. Shi, Sora, Kairi, and Marluxia watched them walk away. Shi sighed, kneeling down to tie her shoe. She mumbled to herself as she tied it, then got up.
"To let you know, we're having a reward challenge tomorrow afternoon at MGM. I'll come get you tomorrow morning. As for their team--I'll surprise them." She walked off, singing to herself. Kairi shook her head.
"I'm not completely sure that's she's all there, you know? Like, in the head." Sora rolled his eyes.
"What gave you that idea!" Shi turned around, about 100 yards away.
"Heard that"
NEXT MORNING, TEAM YENSID Roxas sat up and rubbed his eyes. Looking to his left, he saw Riku curled up in a ball on the floor, rocking from side to side and happily chanting something about Milky Ways and Snickers. Leon had already left to get his morning coffee. So he sleepily stood up and shuffled over to the random freezer, searching for a box of popsicles. After a minute, he gave up and looked in.
The freezer was completely empty.
Roxas shivered and stepped back in fear. Frantic, he scurried over to Riku and shook him awake.
"Hmm? Augh...what is it, blondy""WHAT IS IT"
"Popsicles are gone"
"Oh well." Riku rolled away and fell back asleep. Roxas curled into a fetal position and whined. Leon came back, and he jumped up and ran over.
"What do you want, you insane little blond freak"
"Popsicles are gone"
"That's unfortuante." Leon sipped his coffee and went outside again. Roxas stood in one spot and cried. Leon noticed Shi walking by. She came over to Leon outside and stole his coffee, chucking it into the pond. Leon stared at his empty hand and tried to say something, but Shi cut him off.
"Shut up. I don't care. Where's pretty boy and blondy?" Leon stared, wide-eyed, and pointed to the doors. Shi stomped away and kicked down the already-repaired-once doors. Now they were totaled.
"YO, RIKU, WAKE THE HECK UP!" she screamed, kicking him in the side. He moaned and sat up.
"Why'd you kick me"
"NO TIME FOR QUESTIONS! GET MOVING! HEY BLONDY, GET YOUR BUTT OUT THE DOOR"
"Popsicles are gone." Roxas answered sadly, staring blankly ahead as he walked out towards the pathway to the main land. Riku dragged himself out behind Shi, who barked at Leon for walking too slow. Leon ran up ahead with Roxas.
TEAM DISNEY "Sora, leave the gator alone." Kairi snapped, leading him away from the snarling, snapping alligator. Sora kicked.
"Noooo, he's a puppy, see? A green puppy"
"Puppies aren't green." Marluxia corrected, shining his scythe. "Don't make fun of him. He's green, and that's just fine with me. His name is Fluffy"
"Fluffy doesn't have anything to do with him"
"Yeah it does! Fluffy, here boy!" Fluffy snarled. "He said hello"
"I think he was also implying that he wants to eat you." Kairi sighed, moving Sora further away from the alligator. Shi stomped out from around the corner, followed by Roxas, who looked like a soul in torment, Riku, who was half asleep, and Leon, who looked confused and sort of scared.
"Hi. How's it going? No one's dead? Good. All of you, follow me. Let's get a move on and stop procrastinating." Kairi gaped. Sora gasped. Marluxia hugged his scythe.
Shi walked away, her fists clenched. Marluxia followed. Sora went over to Roxas.
"What's with you?" Kairi nodded.
"Yeah"
"Popsicles are gone"
"Ooh." Sora said, flinching. "You poor child"
"Popsicles are gone"
THIRD CHALLENGE "Okay..." Shi took a calming breath. "I'm okay"
"What was wrong with you...?" Leon asked, apalled.
"KH2...moved back...to March 31st"
"I see." Riku said, stepping back. They were all standing in a semicircle in front of her, at the Who Wants to be a Millionare game in MGM. Sora grinned cheesily.
"It's nice to know you care about me that much"
"Who said I cared about you in particular? Anyway..." Sora looked hurt. Riku laughed at him. "...here we are. At MGM, again. Inside there, two people will go in the Hot Seat. Whoever earns the most points, or should I say 'money', will win a reward for their team. Today's reward is an all you can eat buffet at the Hollywood and Vine outside here. You also get free tickets to Fantasmic"
Sora drooled at the outlook of food. Kairi handed him a napkin to wipe his face off. Shi rolled her eyes.
"Moving on...each team, pick a person to play. The rest of you will be audience." Team Disney looked at each other, then pushed Sora out. Sora meeped and tried to hide. "THANK YOU, SORA, for volunteering! Team Yensid, do you have a player?" Leon looked at Riku.
"Don't you dare try and play. You're dumber than a sack of rocks"
"Gee, thanks"
"Don't mention it." Riku paused.
"So are you going"
"Heck no." Shi listened to all this and nodded.
"'Kay then, Roxas"
"NO!" Riku and Leon screamed, but it was too late. Roxas moved forward subconciously.
"Popsicles are gone"
"GOOD THEN, IT'S SETTLED!" Shi grabbed their hands and rushed them inside. Roxas waited backstage. Sora sat in the Hot Seat, and the rest filed into a row of seats in the crowd. Shi sat in the host's seat. A bunch of lights were on, but they turned to blacklights and then went out. Sora squeaked in fear. Shi sighed happily. "Okay then. These are the rules, Sora. I give you a question. You look down at the screen in front of you and look at the choices. I have the same screen as you, and when you answer, my screen will show me if you're right or not. If you're right, you move up the ladder of points. If you're wrong, you lose. When you reach 1,000 points, you're guaranteed to have a least that many points, and the same with 32,000. If you need help, you have three lifelines-
50-50, which will take away two wrong answers leaving one wrong answer and the right answer, Ask the Audience, where you ask the audience for help, and Phone a Friend, where you can call a specific person outside of Disney or a specific person in the audience for help. Are you ready?" Sora blinked a few times.
"Yeah"
"Okay then! Here's your first question." Shi looked down at her screen, and Sora looked at his. "What culture is the food 'soba' associated with?" Sora stared at the screen. "Chinese, Japanese,
American, or French"
"Um..." Marluxia bit his fingernails. Kairi tapped her foot nervously. Sora continued staring. "I'd say Chinese..." Kairi squealed with protest.
"SORA, YOU HAD THIS FOR DINNER ON OUR FIRST DATE I mean at my birthday once, with other people there." Marluxia started cracking up. Riku fell backwards, howling with laughter. Leon scoffed. "OH YEAH! It's, um, Japanese." Shi checked her screen.
"Right! But Kairi, no more hints...and was it really your first date? How long ago was tha"
"SHUDDAP"
"Looks like I hit a nerve there. Next question. Where are the Winter Olympics this year? China, Russia, the USA, or New Zealand?" Sora grinned.
"China"
"You're...right. How did you"
"Commercials"
"Ah. Again, an example of how TV is molding the young minds of our world." Marluxia said sarcastically. Shi ignored the excessive commentary and went to the next question. Sora got three more right--and got terribly stuck on the sixth question.
"What is the capital of Texas? Austin, Raleigh, Boston, or Los Angeles"
"Can you...repeat that"
"Sora, I've said it over three hundred times"
"301!" Marluxia said, adding a tally to the dry erase board next to him. Riku was doodling in the corner of it, Kairi was painting her nails, and Leon was asleep. Roxas was backstage chanting about popsicles.
Sora shifted uneasily in his chair. "Can I use a lifeline"
"Sure...you can ask the audience or phone a friend." Sora beamed. "I'll ask the audience"
This plan backfired.
"Austin--25. Raleigh--25. Boston--25. L.A.--25." Shi cringed. "There being only four people in the audience, it isn't really a shock that it ended up this way...wow..." Sora sobbed.
"WHY CAN'T YOU PEOPLE JUST AGREE ON SOMETHING"
"We're individuals." Leon muttered, scooching away from Riku. "We're different"
"That's a shocker, NO WONDER YOU MORONS CAN NEVER GET ALONG AND MAKE LIFE EASIER! Now then, Sora, you can make a random guess, probably get it wrong, and bring yourself and your team to shame, and be ostracized and hated by your only friends..." Sora gulped. "...OR you can use the phone a friend and hope and pray that whoever you call isn't a complete moron.
Make a choice in the next five minutes"
10 minutes later.
"I can't believe you." Kairi grumbled, her arms crossed. Sora sat down next to her and sobbed into her shoulder. "You called YOUR MAILMAN"
"But...he remembers where my house is, so I thought he'd remember something like this"
"First of all, he wasn't even home. His brother in law picked up." Riku said. "Second, they thought the answer was Boston. That's the capital of Massachusetts. At the complete other end of the country. How much wronger could you possibly get"
"WRONGER ISN'T EVEN A WORD!" Sora screamed in his defense.
"SO WHAT IF MY GRAMMAR'S OFF! YOU CALLED YOUR STUPID MAILMAN--NOT EVEN THE MAILMAN, HIS BROTHER IN LAW--FOR A QUESTION THAT DECIDES YOUR ENTIRE WELL-BEING!" Kairi clamped a hand over Riku's mouth.
"You're loud. Shut up. Sora, you're a moron, get over it"
"I am not a moron"
"Sora, you tried to order a pizza and forgot what you were calling about"
"I was hungry"
"I can tell. Your brain never works when you're hungry." Marluxia scoffed.
"Not that it ever works anyway..." Sora turned bright red and kicked him in the stomach. Marluxia keeled over and groaned. "You idiot"
"TAKE THAT, PROFESSER FOSSIL!" Sora sat back down happily while Marluxia pulled himself up onto his seat. Leon sighed in his sleep and rearannged his jacket, which he was using as a pillow.
Shi wiped off the Hot Seat, which was covered in Sora's tears. Then she reset the questions and turned to the left, looking off stage. "Roxas? You still there"
"Popsicles are gone." came his faint and depressed reply. He shuffled out, looking at the floor the whole time, and climbed slowly into the chair. "You heard the rules before, right"
"Popsicles are gone"
"Aren't you going to say anything else?" Shi asked. Roxas stared at his screen, not moving except for blinking and breathing. Riku slapped his forehead and hopped over the railing of the first row of seats, stomping his way over to Roxas.
"YOU MORON! THIS OUGHTA KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO YOU!" he raised his fist, but Shi grabbed it.
"Violence solves nothing." Riku stared.
"Dude, don't you ever watch American Idol?" Shi tripped in disgust.
"That's not what I meant. And anyway, problems are never solved on that show either. Go siddown." Riku went. "TRANSLATOR!" A random handheld computer materialized in Shi's hands. "Ah,
good. Now Roxas, you ready"
"Popsicles are gone"
The computer said: TRANSLATION--YES, I AM READY.
"Okay then. Let's go." Shi read off the first question. "What's the Latin word for wolf? Lupus, Canis, Ridet, or Arbor?" Roxas sighed.
"Popsicles...are gone"
TRANSLATION--LUPUS.
"That is correct!" Sora, Riku, Kairi, and Marluxia watched with confusion. Leon snored. "Next question is...what is the name of the mythical dog who guards the Underworld? Cerberus, Hades,
Hercules, or Mercury"
"POPsicles are gone"
TRANSLATION--CERBERUS.
"Right"
4 questions later...it was the infamous question number six.
"Okay then. What does tsubasa mean in Japanese? Bird, sky, wings, or taco"
"Popsiiiiiiiiiiiiicles are gone"
TRANSLATION--WINGS.
"You're...RIGHT! Game over! Team Yensid wins!" Riku jumped up and tackled Leon. Leon woke up, saw Riku hugging him, and hurled him across the room. He hit a light and slammed into the sound booth, scaring away the sound people. Ignoring the pain, Riku stumbled over to Roxas and hugged him. Roxas gasped for air.
"Popsicles are"
"SAY NO MORE, PAL! YOU CAN HAVE AS MANY POPSICLES AS YOU CAN EAT!" Roxas's face lit up. Sora cried. Kairi led him away. Marluxia beat up a chair.
After Team Disney had left, Riku turned to Roxas. "So how'd you get that right? I mean, even I didn't know that." Roxas cleared his throat.
"Well, you see, being in the unemotional state I was, everything became clearer. For example, the reason they never just built a raft on Gilligan's Island is because the season would have ended too soon, the reason pigs can't fly is because they'd crash right back down to the ground, and obviously, the chicken came before the egg"
Shi stared in fear. "You scare me, you know that"
"No." He dove into the buffet that appeared, tearing apart the box of popsicles and shoving three into his mouth at once. Shi sighed and left the three boys to their food.
TEAM DISNEY--5 PM "I cannot believe you"
"Kairi, stop saying that..." Sora scooted across the floor away from her. "...it scares me." Kairi sighed, clenching her fists tightly.
"It scares you, does it? Well how about this--we're out of food, stuck in a theme park, and tonight we'll probably go hungry. How's that sound?" Sora paused.
"Like another typical night in Disney World?" Marluxia nodded in agreement. Kairi shook her head.
"No, it sounds like your nights. You two are going to starve, and I get the food because I said so." She stood up and stormed off. Sora started sobbing.
"She's so heartless...WHAT HAVE I DONE! I'VE DESTROYED HERRRRRRRRRRRR!" Marluxia shrugged, munching flower petals.
"Sure." Sora threw himself onto the ground, kicking and screaming. Marluxia turned greenish and ran for a trash can. Sora stopped.
"Do you ever learn?" Marluxia didn't answer, leaning over a random trash can outside. Sora sniffed. "I'm all alone...in the world..." Marluxia came back and sat down next to him.
"Listen. I see you're having girl problems"
Sora stared at him. "And how the heck are you going to help me? The only girl who even bothers to look at you is probably your mom"
"HEY KID, LOOK HERE..." Sora got up and walked away. Before he was out of sight, he turned around and screamed, "YOUR MOM!" before leaving the Tomorrowland area.
Marluxia stared into the distance. A pigeon landed next to him and looked up at a flower petal in his hair. Marluxia glared. "What are you looking at, feather duster"
TEAM YENSID--5 PM "Roxas, I've never seen anyone eat so many fudgesicles in my life." Riku mumbled, staring at him. Roxas was lying on the floor, seven empty boxes of popsicles surrounding him. His entire face was covered in chocolate and colored popsicle pieces.
"I've died and gone to heaven. Leave me be." he answered, closing his eyes happily. Leon stood up after finishing his fourth double cheeseburger with the works.
"I'm going back. I'm tired"
"Did you just say you're...tired?" Riku asked, looking at him with confusion.
"...Yeah"
"Migawd..." Roxas said, sitting up. "The alien has feelings"
"I'm not an alien"
"He's in denial? I didn't know aliens could be in denial." Riku said. Roxas nodded. Leon clenched his fists.
"I...am...not an ALIEN! I'M HUMAN"
"Are not." Roxas retorted, chewing on a popsicle stick. "Oh yeah? Who isn't human, you NOBODY"
Roxas gasped.
Riku gasped.
Shi screamed.
"LEON!" Leon spun around, watching with fear as Shi stomped over, carrying a baseball bat. "That was insensitive and cruel. This calls for immediate action. All of you, to the peer mediation room"
"You have one of those..." Roxas started to ask.
"GET MOVIN', OR I'LL HIT A HOMER ON YOUR HEAD!" The three boys took of to the mediation room and sat down in seperate chairs. Shi sat at the big desk, on top of a few phonebooks.
"It takes three phonebooks for you to see over that desk?" Riku asked, laughing. Shi glared.
"Yes, Riku. And it takes only one large amount of pressure to your head, from one large swing, to knock you into a coma for the next year." Riku turned pale. "Good. Now that we understand each other, we'll begin this session. Roxas, you first"
Roxas gulped. "Okay"
"Now then. Back there, we all heard Leon call you a Nobody. This may be true, but what is your outlook on this sinful event"
"Um...well...he's a jerk"
"Yes, we know that. But how do you FEEL about that"
"I feel...angered"
"And"
"And...degraded"
"Degraded." Shi said, looking at Leon and then Riku. "You all heard it. HE FEELS DEGRADED. How could you sinful bullies batter a boy's mentality so much that he no longer feels he is worth it?" Riku's eyes filled with tears. Leon flicked a wubbie off his jacket. "LEON"
"Hm"
"What do you have to say for yourself, young man"
"...I'm older than you"
"That's beside the point. What do you have to say for yourself"
"Nothing"
"I see. So you have no feeling at all over what you have done"
"Nope"
Shi paused. "That...is sick." She glared at Leon and banged her fist on the desk. "SICK! YOU ARE A SINNER AT HEART, DEGRADING A CHILD YOUNGER THAN YOU JUST BECAUSE YOU FEEL YOU HAVE THE AUTHORITY OVER HIM! WELL YOU KNOW WHAT! YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY, LEON! YOU'RE NOTHING BUT DUST IN THE WIND, AND YOU WILL SOON RUE THE DAY YOU EVER KNEW ME AND MY BASEBALL BAT EXISTED"
-cricket cricket cricket-
"Um?" Riku said, standing up. "I think I'm gonna leave now..." he ran outside, followed by Roxas. Leon stayed where he was, looking at Shi with a mixture of fear and confusion.
"You're insane." he said finally, standing up.
Shi smiled. "Good. Fear it."