Chapter 3

She knew he wouldn't repeat himself. Feeling drunk and blurry without ever having taken a drink she fought the snot filled thickness in her head and flung herself toward the phone.

"Gibbs?" Her voice sounded desperate but she didn't care. If it was him he might as well know how she felt and if it wasn't…

"Are you okay?"

She didn't have time to worry about the 'if it wasn't'. His voice soothed even as it angered her. "Okay? She practically screamed it back at him. No Gibbs, I'm not okay, I'm as far from okay as I've been in a long time. What makes you think I could be anywhere near okay?"

He closed his eyes. Her throat sounded even more graveled than usual, a sign that she'd been crying hard. He could picture her pacing and becoming ever more chaotic inside her mind.

If he had been able to see through the phone he would have been surprised to find she wasn't pacing at all, she was lying on the floor, in the fetal position, her eyes shut tight against the world.

"Abbs." He caressed her with his voice, "It's going to be alright. I promise."

"I don't believe you." The tired voice of a small child admonished him. "You don't leave, Gibbs, that's not what you do."

"I have to." He knew he shouldn't have called; he didn't want to get pulled into a discussion. The problem was he couldn't leave with the mental image of Abby's face when he'd kissed her cheek. Her eyes haunted him. It was his last selfless act. He reconsidered, thinking that it wasn't entirely selfless, his concern for Abby.

"Where are you going?"

"I want you know I care about you."

"NO! Stop it! If you cared you wouldn't leave." Though she wouldn't have believed there could be any tears left she began to cry again.

"Please don't cry darlin'."

"When?"

"Tomorrow morning."

"I want to see you tonight."

He bowed his head, his heart racing. This was supposed to be a quick cut. He was supposed to be able to turn his back and walk away from everything at a moments notice with no regrets. It was what he promised himself back in 1991 when his heart died.

"I'm on my way." He whispered before he flipping his phone shut.