Chapter Eleven

Unlike when he'd kissed Carter 2, there was no question in his mind that he was with the real Carter. Half of her anyway. There was no hesitation or fear or worry, just emotion - the very same emotion he never let himself feel. He loved her, pure and simple, and it was his one chance to convey that to her in the simplest possible terms.

His hands slipped back further into her hair, trapping her mouth on his - not that she was trying to get away. He opened his mouth to deepen the kiss, trailing his tongue lightly across her lips. She whimpered softly as she offered him access and clutched his jacket tightly.

Wrapping his arms around her and pulling her fully against him, he felt her weight sag suddenly into his arms. He grinned against her mouth. He'd never actually made a woman weak in the knees before and the fact that it was Carter - well is did nothing to quell his inflated ego. Kissing her was like a drug - his thoughts shut down until all he could process was how very good it felt to kiss her and mean it.

The sound of the alarms started quietly, barely making a dent in his foggy brain. But as he registered the fact that Carter was no longer clinging to him, the alarms grew louder. By the time he realized that she wasn't just not clinging to him, but actively pushing him away, the alarm was deafening.

He felt her hands shoving at him, but his senses were overloaded at the moment and he didn't let go of her. Instead, he tried to pull her back to him, the vague, hazy idea occurring to him that if he could just get her to kiss him again it would stop the alarms and her resistance. He leaned forward again.

And instantly, a hard slap fell across his cheek.

It certainly wasn't what he'd been expecting, but it was exactly what he needed to bring himself back to reality. A very dark, cramped reality hiding out in an access shaft with his second in command who'd just, quite literally, had to slap some sense into him. His arms released her automatically while he blinked stupidly in the darkness. His hand moved to his cheek where he could still feel the stinging sensation. He wasn't entirely sure why she'd hit him since she'd seemed a perfectly willing participant in the kiss. He vaguely recalled her resisting there at the end, but he couldn't believe she'd been that upset because all she'd done was slap him - if he'd hurt her, or she'd thought he was trying, he was pretty sure the damage would be far, far worse than a slap.

He searched for her eyes in the darkness and found nothing. "Carter?"

"Sir, this is really quite improper behavior." Her voice was laced with disdain, but he couldn't understand how willingly she'd kissed him back.

"Carter?"

His confusion must have been painfully obvious to her. The next thing he felt was her palms against his cheeks as she pressed a quick kiss on his lips. "Perhaps your timing could use some work."

The sensation of her lips against his erased any thought of the slap. But his mind was no closer to understanding with more contradictory information to process. "Carter?"

"Do you hear the alarm, sir? I believe that's for us."

"Oh, right." He almost defended his denseness by explaining that being anywhere around her and, more recently added, kissing her rendered him into a semi-conscious stupor due to his blood flow redirecting to points south, but, in a moment of clarity, he decided that statement was probably likely to get him slapped as well.

"We should probably talk about this, right, Carter?" He winced as he said it, remembering that the talking about it after was exactly why he never gave in to the urge to kiss her.

"Honestly, sir, I'm more concerned about the impending court martial. I'm not a big fan of talking about this kind of stuff."

Jack grinned at her in the darkness before pushing open the door behind him. "God, I love you."

He didn't mean to actually voice the words and didn't even realize he had until Carter looked up at him, wide-eyed disbelief causing her to trip ungracefully over the step in front of her.

She was sprawled comically on the floor at his feet. Very slowly, she lifted her face to stare at him. "What?"

Realizing from her reaction that he'd spoken out loud, his own eyes went wide. "Nothing?" Frustrating as it was, they seemed to do better specifically not talking about their relationship. In fact, it seemed very much as though Carter's coordination was based heavily on silence between them.

Her face still revealed shock, as though his voicing the words unexpectedly and unbidden wasn't something she would recover from for some time. Keeping her eyes on him suspiciously, she picked herself up off the floor. Jack closed the door to the access shaft, smiling to himself that he'd never think of it again without the delicious memory of kissing Carter. He tried to hide his grin as he turned back to her, but he failed miserably. He was grinning like an idiot. She looked terrified.

He started back toward the elevators where they'd run away, but Carter didn't move. "Come on, Carter." He reached back to snag her wrist, leading her the way he had before.

The alarms were still ringing like mad, but there was no one waiting for them. Obviously, no one expected that they were just down the hall, having a private moment, or that they would spontaneously return on their own. Jack knew they were in considerable trouble and he wasn't relishing the idea of getting yelled at. Normally, he wouldn't worry about talking his way out of it, but he couldn't very well explain to Hammond the perfectly legitimate reason he'd had to run off with Carter. He doubted that Hammond would understand or even believe that he'd absolutely needed to kiss Carter at that very moment. Not to mention that telling Hammond would defeat the purpose of finding a room without a camera in the first place.

After waiting, partially deafened by the continuous wail of the alarms, for several minutes, Jack looked at Carter and shrugged.

She still looked rather jumpy as she glared back. "If I'm going to get in trouble for this, I think you should know that I will tell on you, sir."

Jack couldn't believe it. "You wouldn't rat on me!"

"If it came down to my career I would." He realized her statement made a lot of sense considering which half of Carter he was talking to, especially when he remembered how quick she'd been to point at him during that little armband mix-up when he'd tried to blame the brawl at O'Malley's on her.

"You didn't seem to mind when I was kissing you."

At the word kissing, Carter's head jerked around, checking over both shoulders for anyone who might have heard. Satisfied there were no witnesses, she leaned in so her hiss could be heard over the alarm. "That is beside the point, sir."

Jack was heartened by the fact that she wasn't denying it. "You rat on me, I'll rat on you."

"It was your brilliant idea, sir."

Jack grinned smugly. "It was one of my better ones, wasn't it?"

Carter stared at him for a moment, trying to suppress the smile that wouldn't be denied. "You're going to get me court martialed, sir."

"If I do, I'll get you a really good lawyer." He ignored her answering glare and started leading her to the infirmary. He figured maybe if he turned them in, someone would stop the screeching.

It only took a second after they walked through the doors for someone to silence the alarm. Jack tried to ignore the fact that Carter, the one with him anyway, was doing her best to hide behind him. He saw Teal'c and Daniel being poked and prodded by nurses. He saw Carter 2 sitting on a cot, flirting shamelessly with the SF she'd been making eyes at in the gate room. He saw a very shocked Janet Fraiser with a phone to her ear and he made a mental note to thank her, since it was likely her call that stopped the alarms.

The sudden absence of the alarms left the room strangely silent. Even as his ears continued to ring, Jack realized it wasn't just the alarms that caused the quiet. Everyone, even Carter 2, had turned to stare at them.

Jack shrugged and figured it was because to everyone else it looked like he and Carter 1 had just tried to disappear. He shrugged noncommittally. "We got lost. These hallways all look the same."

Everyone continued to stare, not even acknowledging his pathetic attempt to lie and thus leaving Jack to feel particularly exposed. He had a feeling whatever he was missing, whatever undoubtedly obvious clue to their little rendezvous he hadn't noticed, was going to haunt him for a long time. He made a quick judgment call and decided that Carter 2 was the most likely to help him out. He met her eyes, unexpectedly finding them angry. "Carter?"

She folded her arms over her chest and turned away. "Don't even speak to me."

He had no idea why she was mad and it wasn't exactly the optimal situation to discuss their feelings, but he couldn't let it go. "Carter, what are you mad at now?"

"Uh, Jack?" Daniel busied himself with adjusting his glasses to avoid making eye contact as he nodded back at them.

Jack figured he was trying to help, but he still didn't have a clue. He glanced at Carter 1, who was staring at him with quite possibly more shock and befuddlement than anyone else. His eyes slowly made their way back to the floor, barely even noticing the way he was holding Carter's hand. But the anomaly slowly processed through his brain and his gaze returned to fix on their hands and their interwoven fingers.

He swallowed hard. It was not a blunder that he could easily rectify. There were simply far too many witnesses, not the least of which was the woman who appeared to have been well aware of it the whole time. He remembered reaching out for her wrist to bring her with him. He couldn't explain, however, how or when something had changed. He wanted to ask her why she'd just stared rather than calling his attention to it, but he belatedly realized that might have had something to do with why she appeared so freaked out by him.

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and shook his head. "Fuck it. I give up."

And then he just waited for someone to say something. And he waited without letting go of her hand.