And the second!
Um...Language content: unsuitable for kids. Implications. Mentions of strange kinks. Mentions of Voldie/Dead!Harry. Fawkes sings U2.
Harry: La la la, I love dark scary sewer/dungeons!
Tom: Yeah, me too. But I'm mental, so I don't count.
Harry: It's the journal dude!
Tom: OMG Harry, can I like have your autograph?
Harry: Any more autographs and I will suicide.
Tom: My evil plan is - I mean, what a shame. What a horrible, horrible thing to happen to you.
Harry: Somehow I detect a lack on sincerity...probably something from Lockhart's memory charm.
Tom: (to himself) No it's not. Note to self: recruit this Lockhart dude.
Harry: Ew, there's all this gunk on my robes!
Tom: Think about it. I've been down here a while...locked up all alone, what would you do?
Harry: I AM DISTURBED.
Tom: Oh, by the way, I'm that psycho out to kill you. Reincarnated.
Harry: OMGWTF
Basilisk: Preeeeciouuuusss...
Voldie/Tom: IT'S...IT'S...IT'S ALIVE!
Harry: Dare I say: I AM DISTURBED. AGAIN.
Tom: Damn right, bitch!
Harry: I seem to be screwed. Again.
Fawkes+Sorting Hat:CHAAAAARGE!
Voldie: CHEEEEEEECK!
Harry: Somehow the moment of safety promised by these tokens of Hogwarts fails to reach me.
Voldie: Big words for a doomed schmuck.
Fawkes: I tawt I taw a puddy tat!
Basilisk: Meow, baby, meow!
Voldie: No! The boy! NOT the plot device!
Harry: Voila! I pull out from a hat...a sword? Dammit, that's not a rabbit!
Voldie: My, Harry, what a large sword you have...
Harry: Stabbitystabstab. Die, die, snake-that-flirted-with-a-phoenix.
Basilisk: (perishes)
Harry: You fail!
Voldie: You're dying. Necrophilia time!
Harry: Dammit, I fail too.
Fawkes: I will sing...sing a new song!
Harry: I feel...cold...
Voldie: You are so off my friendslist, birdie!
Harry: Watch as I unwittingly destroy one of the sixth book's plot points!
Voldie: I'm meeeeeeeeelting!
Yeah. Not as good as the first. The third is better.
I love CAPSLOCK!Harry, just to let you know. If you hadn't guessed. And yes, at some point in each chapter Harry will exclaim OMGWTF because I say so. Nyeh.
I already got one flame, which I take as a good omen. Keep reviewing!
