AN: No reviews? Awww, nobody loves me : (

Denial A River in Egypt

He kissed me, oh lord did Jake kiss me, Tobias thought. He was perched on his favourite tree within his territory. He was hungry, there was a mouse down in his meadow, it had a broke leg and was making a lot of noise, an easy kill, but Tobias couldn't leave his branch. It was still bucketing down rain, he was cold and wet, no different from when he had been in the graveyard. And Jake…he was so perfect, even before the kiss. Standing there with those soulful brown eyes, filled with kindness and concern…and something else Tobias had never seen in his eyes before. Jake actually listened to Tobias, he told him that he was his friend, that he understood him. Then he…

Oh god the feeling of Jake's soft pink lips against his…indescribable. He thought he was flying again, but he was human and his feet were on the ground. There was a gorgeous god parting his lips, running his tongue across Tobias's, tenderly and gently pulling him closer, grasping Tobias's back and pulling him into an embrace. Tobias had surrendered himself over to it, it was so wonderful how couldn't he. He had wrapped his arms around Jake and let the other boy taste him, every inch of Tobias's mouth was explored and claimed.

A large clap of thunder had broken their moment. Jake pulled away in shock has lightning flashed above them. Tobias wanted nothing more than to grab hold of Jake again and kiss him with all the passion Jake had awoken inside of him. Oh god, he wanted Jake's hands on him, everywhere, he wanted Jake to touch him, to caress him. To taste his bare skin and claim Tobias's body as his own. And then Tobias would do the same to him. He wanted to see Jake's wet naked body and taste every inch of him, make him moan and plead and writher beneath him. Oh god, what was he thinking! Why, how can Jake make him feel like that? Why had he never felt like that with Rachel? It had scared him, how much he wanted Jake at that moment. He had demorphed so quickly it would have shamed Cassie's abilities. He took off into his security and home, the sky. Tobias thought he heard Jake call out to him, but it could have been the thunder.

He still wanted it, wanted him. But it was wrong. Jake was a guy, and not just a guy, his friend. For Christ sake he was his leader! The leader of the Animorphs, if they were in the army Jake would be the General. Jake was the one that made the plans, called the shots, fought at the front and spoke those daring words to Visser Three. He protected them, all of them, he would gladly give his life to save anyone of ours. In a way…Tobias thought…that was what was plaguing the boy. Jake was becoming obsessed, Tobias saw how hard it was for him, to keep being strong, no matter what happened. They'd each had their moments, breakdowns, crying and screaming and quitting at one point or another. But not Jake, he couldn't, he had to keep at it, he thought it was his responsibility. He needs an outlet, something to keep him stable, to steady him out. He needs someone to take care of him for once, to have someone to offer himself to, to loose control and not have lives riding on it. Tobias felt his heart burn at the thought of being that person. He wanted it more than anything, more than being human or winning the war. He wanted to be Jake's something. But he couldn't, it would never work out…Tobias couldn't do it, he wasn't able to. He'd just end up screwing things over, like he usually did. Tobias wasn't good for anything, it's what he had been told his whole life and he knew it was right.

Jake lay in his bed, still drenched from the rain. He hadn't changed or had a shower. He had just collapsed on his bed, letting his mind run over the accounts of that afternoon. He had kissed a guy, and liked it…a lot. So did that make him gay? Or just bi? Did that even matter? Jake remembered the way Tobias had submitted himself to the kiss and Jake shivered with delight. Jake never wanted anyone so fiercely before. He wanted to continue his kisses down Tobias's pale enticing neck and over his masculine chest and down…Jake groaned in frustration what the hell! Why the sudden did he suddenly find Tobias so damn attractive…he hadn't had these feelings before…for anyone…had he? Jake thought back to all those times he had spoken with the dark haired melancholic dream boy. Maybe …maybe it wasn't so sudden…Jake tried to think back to the first time he had seen Tobias…was there something there? He couldn't remember. He suppose it didn't matter, because whether it was there at the beginning or not it sure as hell was there now.

Not that anything was going to come of it. Tobias had left hadn't he? He realised what he had been doing, freaked out and left Jake standing there for an hour confused and…yes okay he admitted, a little hurt. Why did he do it…why couldn't he just given Tobias a hug or a friendly pat on the back, no he had to go make out with the boy of his dreams. Jake sighed. A gust of wind blew through his window, rain accompanied it, having no more effect on Jake of course because he was already drenched. Jake knew he should probably close the window but he didn't want to…what if Tobias came by? Jake rolled over and sighed. He wanted him, and not just physically, he wanted Tobias here with him, to talk with him, or not even that. Just to be there, his presence would be enough. A comfort.

Oh god why did he have to kiss him. He came on way too strong. Tobias was going to hate him, think he'd tried to take advantage of him or something oh god…had he? A large breeze swept into the room, Jake sat up and looked out of his window.

(Jake)

Jake turned around and found Tobias perched on his desk chair. Jake bit his lip, oh no he wasn't ready yet, forget what he said, he wasn't hopping Tobias would show up, he wasn't ready for this confrontation

-Sure and that's why you left the window open- Jake's inner voice told him.

(You're completely soaked!) Tobias realised.

'Erh…yeah,' Jake agreed, blushing slightly.

(Why did you leave the window open there's a storm going on outside, you're entire beds soaked as well!) Tobias asked surprised. Jake blushed further and closed his window.

'I uh didn't want to close it…' Jake looked at the ground 'In case…in case you came by…'

(Oh) was all Tobias said. There was silence for a few moments.

(I think…we should probably…I don't know…talk) Tobias tried

'We are talking,' Jake played dumb. Tobias gave him the look, don't as him how he knew Tobias was giving him the look, he was a hawk! But Jake knew.

'Alright fine,' Jake sighed.

(Okay then…so about the-)

'Could you...,' Jake gestured toward Tobias on the chair 'Would you mind?'

(Oh yeah! Sure, umm sorry,) Tobias morphed and sat in the chair, fully human.

'Thanks,' Jake said keeping his eyes on the floor.

'Listen Jake-,'

'I've been thinking,' Jake cut in, he sat indian style on his bed, but still gazed at the floor 'About something for you to do…you know something that would tie you back to our world?'

Tobias looked at him with expressionless eyes.

'Well…you could always try going back to school?' Jake offered.

'Back to school?' Tobias asked, frowning a little.

'Yeah,' Jake ruffled up his hair 'I mean the guys would help out, we'd give you the books, a bag, you can have some of my old clothes that I've grown out of…they should fit you,'

Tobias sat there thinking it over.

'I mean, you use to do Rachel's homework right? Why not?' Jake reasoned.

'I suppose,' Tobias spoke finally. Jake smiled warmly.

'Great…cause you know…I'd never want you to feel left out…or pressured into anything…you don't have to do it if you don't want to…I'd never want to put you into a position you weren't comfortable in,' Jake spoke, with a double meaning. Tobias looked up at him, getting the clue. 'Because…' –here goes- 'I really care about you-,'

'Jake-,'

'And I'm sorry about…the kiss…I really shouldn't have and I'm really-,' Tobias strode across the room sat on his knees beside Jake on his bed, and stopped Jake's words with his lips. It felt breathtakingly amazing the first time, it felt like pure bliss when the kiss was reciprocated. Tongue's touched and electricity sparked between them, both boys opened their mouths, tongues tasting desperately, not able to get enough of the other's sweet flavour. The kiss became extremely heated, lips nipped softly and tasted with a sweep on delicate tongues. Hands began to roam. Tobias slipped his hand up underneath the wet fabric of Jake's shirt and began to feel the wet chest of the other boy. Jake gasped and slipped his hands down to grasp Tobias's hips. The need for air became too demanding and they separated panting. Tobias was too hungry to stop, he licked the side of Jake's jaw bone and kissed, sucked and nipped his way down Jake's neck. Jake moaned and clutched at Tobias urgently.

'Tobias,' Jake gasped.

'MMmmmm?' Tobias asked into Jake's neck.

'Maybe…ahhh…maybe we should uhhh….take slow,' Jake made it. Tobias reluctantly pulled his mouth from Jake's neck, which earned a whimper in return.

'Yeah…you're right,' Tobias breathed heavily. Jake nodded.

'Besides you need to have a shower,' Tobias pointed out.

'Are you implying that I stink?' Jake grinned.

'No, I'm implying that if you stay in those wet clothes any longer you're going to get pneumonia,' Tobias smiled.

'Oh…alright then,' Jake grinned and stood up to go the bathroom, but stopped and turned back to Tobias when he reached his door.

'Go on, I'm not going anywhere,' Tobias promised. Jake smiled and walked down the hallway.

When Jake came back Tobias was lying on his bed waiting for him. Instead of sitting on his chair Jake walked to his bed and laid down beside the other boy.

'Hey,' Jake spoke softly.

'Hey,' Tobias said in return and snuggled into Jake's shoulder.

'I want to ask…what this all means, but I really don't want to spoil the moment,' Jake sighed. Tobias smiled into Jake's neck.

'What do you want it to mean?' Tobias asked.

'That we're both going to try this, to have it not be just physical…I guess I want to try and…have a relationship with you?'

'Me too,' Tobias whispered. They just held each other for a while, outside the storm had settled and it turned dark.

'I suppose this makes me gay,' Jake spoke suddenly.

'No necessarily you could be bi, you've had girlfriends,' Tobias reasoned.

'Yeah, both times felt really weird,' Jake laughed.

'Really?'

'Yeah…,' Jake laughed again 'Beside's look at Cassie…baggy overalls, hides everything away, short hair cut…that should have explained everything,'

Tobias laughed,

'Yeah me too, I had the hottest girl in school…and we didn't do a damn thing…just flying,'

'Denial just not a river in Egypt?' Jake suggested. Tobias laughed again.

'Yeah, not anymore though. This feels so good, no way I'm giving it up,' Tobias snuggled closer.

'Yeah,' Jake sighed happily 'Me too,'

'Should we…should we tell the others?' Tobias asked.

'…no…it's not that I'm ashamed of this or you or anything just…I like having this all to myself…you know? My own secret?'

'Yeah, know what you mean,' Tobias agreed 'Plus it might build up a lot of tension in our little group, not a good idea when our lives depend on one another,'

'Oh shit!' Jake realised sitting up 'I didn't even think about how this would effect the battle ahh war!'

'Really?' Tobias beamed 'That would be a first,'

'Hey…it is too,' Jake grinned and settled back beside his boyfriend, who held him close just as fiercely.

AN: I'd appreciate Reviews...from anyone...please?