Chapter 8: Paradise Ruined
After their battle with Satan, they were all living in piece. Carl finally found a girlfriend to hang with. Sheen asked Libby to marry him. Jimmy asked Cindy to marry him.
It was supposed to be a double weeding until "Do you Jimmy take Cindy to be you awful wedded wife, to hold and to love, until death do you part, again."
"I do".
"And do you Cindy take Jimmy to be your awful wedded husband, to hold and to love; till death do you part, again."
"I, I, I don't."
"What, Why?"
"I have a reason. When I was with Satan, he forced me to have relations with him. I tried not to, but he was too strong. He got me pregnant. I'm carrying Satan's baby. I'm sorry!"
Just then, Jimmy faints.
"Jimmy, Jimmy. Are you okay? JIMMY! Somebody call 911."
EMS arrives and takes "Brain Boy" to the hospital. He wakes up to find Cindy, Carl, Sheen, and Libby by his bedside.
"AHH! What happened?"
"You fainted at the wedding alter".
"Talk about being afraid of commitment," said an unfamiliar voice.
"Who said that?"
"It is I the Immortal Mortal; I have come to give you a message from God, That lazy son of a bitch. He told me to tell you that Satan's Baby, the baby Cindy is carrying, must be killed before the next full moon; otherwise the entire human race is going to be extinct and sent not to Heaven, Purgatory, or Hell, but to the Eternal Grave. Remember to kill it before the next full moon. And also, Jimmy, You must marry Cindy by Midnight tomorrow. Otherwise there will be dire consequences."
"What consequences".
"The human race not being able to adapt, evolve, and survive".
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"If you and Cindy don't get married, then you won't "boink" each other. If you don't "boink" each other than you wont have kids. If you don't have kids, they won't find love and reproduce. Then the human species won't evolve and will eventually die out".
"Oh".
"Simply put kill Satan's baby, have relations with Cindy, reproduce, and continue the chain of human life. Got it".
"Okay, but I have one Question. Do we have to reproduce right away? Can't we wait till were of legal age."
"Yes, Wait. To tell you the truth, I was about to tell you to wait until your of legal age. Although Cindy has already lost her Virginity to Satan, you have not lost yours. Therefore you will be forced to wait. Don't do it early or there will be dire consequences for all of you. Sheen and Libby I need to talk to you in private now!"
They leave the room. Carl, Cindy, and Jimmy are left in the room. "I'm hungry, I'm getting something to eat, see ya in a bit." said Carl.
He leaves. It was just Cindy and Jimmy.
"What do think of…?"
Cindy put her finger of his lips. As she does, she moves closer to him. She kisses him. French-style. They were about to go to first and second bases, when the door opened suddenly. It was Carl. And he had a camera. He took a picture of Jimmy and Cindy kissing and "getting it on". And to make matters worse for them it was an instantaneously printing digital camera. After taking the photo, Carl ran to try and find a computer with internet on it. Cindy chased after him.
"I'm going to hurt him," she said to herself.
She, obviously, catches up to him in no time.
"Give me the photo and the camera".
"Hell no".
"Give me that".
"No No"
She punches him in the face.
"Give me the photo and camera or I'm going to go into a nearly unstoppable rage with you as the target. Now give me it."
"Not going to happen. This need to be known to more people. I'm not giving these up. Forget it".
While all this was going on, the Immortal mortal was talking to Sheen and Libby.
"You know what to do".
"Yes Sr.".
They all walk back to Jimmy's room.
"Jimmy, we have come with a decision. This decision does not come lightly, but in spite of recent events, we want you and Cindy to "do it" early, so that Satan's baby will instantaneously be obviated."
Carl runs in.
"Guys come quickly, something's wrong with Cindy. She may be hurt. Come on".
All except Jimmy leave Room.
"Shit, I want to come to".
They all find Cindy and are shocked at who they see next. They all see Satan's Baby and Timmy Turner.
"What are you doing here TT?"
"I'm here to help you destroy Satan's baby without Cindy and Jimmy "doing it".
"Ha, Ha, Ha, me and Nerdbomb would never "do it" in a million years".
"According to this photo I found, you're lying through your teeth".
"What photo?"
TT takes out Carl's photo.
"Does this photo ring any bells?"
"How the hell did you get that?"
"Magically".
"Magically? What the hell are you talking about?"
"Never mind. We have to destroy Satan's baby now! If we don't, not only is your universe in danger, but mine is too. To make a long story short, Satan's baby will destroy the entire UCAB. That means nothing besides itself will be alive. That's bad. Very bad."
"AHH!"
"What's wrong?"
"HAHAHA I'm free. Finally, I will fulfill the mission of my father, and destroy the UCAB. I'll start by killing you. HAHAHA"
"Not if I have anything to say about it"
(Jimmy comes in with a pair of machine guns).
"Who the hell are you, and where did you get those machine guns."
"Who am I? I'm your personal Hell."
"Die!"
(Jimmy gets into a battle with Satan's baby. He was winning until…)
"I'm back, and ready for reverence. I'll start with you, savior.
(Satan and Satan's baby double-team Jimmy. They kill him).
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
(Cindy, Libby, and Timmy all collapses.)
"I suggest we run!"
(Carl and Sheen run while Satan and his baby kill Cindy, Libby, and Timmy. The police arrive).
"We have you surrounded, come out here with your hands up."
"Go to Hell!".
(Satan and his baby kill the entire police swadrin.)
"Damn, Satan and his kid and killing everybody. What do we do? Jimmy gone, and so is Cindy, Libby, Timmy, and the police. What the hell do we do?".
"I don't know."
"Well we could try to kill Satan and his baby."
(Carl's new girlfriend, Sam, walks up to 'em).
"We can't do that, it's impossible."
"Ya, we'll get killed."
"Well, were going to get killed anyways, why not go out fighting. The army is useless, the human race is going to be extinct, and the only few people who can stop them are dead. We have to try something".
"I agree".
(The Immortal Mortal pops into the conversation.).
"What can we possible do IM? Were just kids. We can't stop two of the most powerful beings in the universe."
"Oh, no. I disagree. If Jimmy can do it, being just a kid, then we, as a group, can defeat them."
"Yes, but Jimmy's a genius, and besides, he only faced one of them, not both. Did you see what they did to him? They tore him apart. And not only did they tear him apart, but the killed Cindy, Libby and Timmy, and decimated the police. It's hopeless."
"Listen to me, we can defeat them. Think about it, do want there deaths to be in vain? Do you want the original victory over Satan to be a memory, or a reality? We might be outmatched, but if we combine out strength, knowledge and wisdom, we can defeat them. We may be outmatched, but there's strength in numbers. Now who's with me?"
"We are to the end!"
(They go near the allies of destruction.)
"Satan, I'm calling you out".
"You think you can take out me and my son by yourself. You're foolish."
"I may be foolish, but I'm no coward. I'm sending you to the eternal grave, so you can rot."
"Never!"
(Satan and The Immortal Mortal battle while Carl, Sheen, Sam, and Satan's baby watch.)
"You're going down Satan."
"Never".
"DIE!".
(They battle. The Immortal Mortal wins. He kills Satan).
"I told you, you can't kill me."
"Ha-ha, my old man was a fool. Why don't you take on a real challenge? Me.".
(The Immortal Mortal and Satan's baby battle. Satan ends up killing The Immortal Mortal. Or so he thought.)
"HAHAHA, I have won. Immortal my ass. You're just a bitch with a temper. HAHAHA."
"The joke's on you Satan 2."
(The Immortal Mortal stabs Satan's baby, killing him.). "I've won Bitch! You can't beat me."
