A.N. This is my favorite chapter in the whole story. . . after that, it's just kinda...okay...

Thanks to all my lovely reviewers. . .Mr.Girl (obsessions are perfectly healthy), Suicial RuBBerDuckie (Um. . .they use paste. . . I love your name by the way...), moose-muffins, and helgoth11 (XD I pictured a diembodied head actually. . .either that, or I was gonna have Pleecy hiding in the freezy box like a stalker. . ) You guys all recieve a virtual kiss of doom!

There's a reference to Kacer in here. . .for those of you who never read 'Emotion Sickness', Kacer is Dib's friend. . .girl. . . thing. . .

The Third Chapter of Doom

No Jelly for Zim

Zim wasn't expecting a crowd. And he wasn't expecting everyone in that crowd to be half-naked. And he definately wasn't expecting one of the half-naked people in the crowd to be Tak. True, she's in her human disguise, as is Pleecy (who's bathing suit is much more revealing), but still, just the thought of Tak showing that much skin. . .It makes Zim's insides feel icky. He himself has never shown more skin then his face and hands to. . . well, anyone.

So now Zim sits by the entrance of the beach, completely clothed, in the burning sand, and he's sweating like crazy.

Poor him.

In the distance, Tak, Pleecy, Gir, Mimi and Minimoose are all wading in the water. Pleecy keeps looking back at Zim, either to wink or blow him a kiss. She will occasionally strike a pose for him, which cause him to grimace. He really wants her to go away.

He watches as Gir splashes in the water and knocks Pleecy over. As she chases Gir around in a little circle, Zim notices Tak is actually looking back at him for once. Even though she's kinda far away, he swears she's offering him a small smile. She's even begun to wave at him a little.

Zim starts to smile himself, and is about to wave, when a rather large woman, in a rather skimpy bikini, blocks his view of Tak.

She (the bikini lady) is just kinda standing in front of Zim, unmoving. Behind her, Zim is screaming, "Hey! Move it! Get out of the way! Hey! Move! Move it lady!" The woman glances at Zim with an enormous smile, and at the words, "Move your body!", she begins to dance wildly.

And considering Zim is standing directly behind her, he is left quite tramuatized, and falls to the ground in horror. A few moments later, he hears a familiar voice say slowly, ". . .Zim?"

Zim opens his eyes and hovering over him is Dib. He stands up, squints his eyes and says, "Is that you, Dib-monster?"
"Um, yeah."

Zim wipes some sweat out of his eyes, and he begins to smirk in somewhat of a reliefm until he realizes Dib is in nothing but his shorts.

"Augh!" he shouts, his hands shielding his eyes in a frantic motion, "My worst enemy, half-naked! I CAN NOT BARE IT!"

Zim falls to the ground again. Dib just rolls his eyes.

"Whatever, Zim. . . is Tak here?"

Raising a rather shaky hand, Zim points to the direction of the ocean, then proceeds to twitch and sweat and be Zim. Dib walks valiantly past Zim and the fat bikini lady (who is still dancing), and it takes Zim a few minutes to stop twitching. When he does, he realizes Gaz is standing a few feet away, though hidden under a dark cloak.

"You! Human meat female!" Zim shouts with the little energy he has left, "Help me off the ground! Zim is too weak from the Earth heat!"

Gaz walks over to Zim slowly, who is reaching to her with an outstretched hand. Then she kicks sand in his face and walks away.


"If you were that hot Zim," Tak says, "you should've just joined us in the water."

"Never!" Zim says defiantly. "The water looked contaminated, and it didn't make it any better when you let Dib tag along."

"That, and I bet you can't even swim," Tak mutters, but she says that at the same moment Dib kicks Zim under the bar counter, so he pays Tak no mind. Instead, he flops off the barstool, and begins screaming at Dib, which kinda causes quite a few people in the ice cream parlor to stare.

Pleecy suddenly grabs Zim by the shoulders, and begins to give him a massage. Zim is very confused.

"W-what are you doing?" he asks.

Leaning in very close, and breathing very softly, Pleecy whispers, "Just trying to calm you down Zim. . ." and then Zim has no choice but to sit back down. Besides, he's tired.

Dib makes a face to Zim, who's now officially ticked off, but before he can react, Tak grabs his arm and says, "Let it go."

"Why'd you have to invite him anyway!" Zim demands.

"Because he has no one else to hang out with," Tak answers, deadpan.

"Well, what about that girl, Keeshy or whatever-"

"It's 'Kacer'," Dib intercepts. He looks annoyed. "Her name is 'Kacer' and she's visiting her mom all summer long, so I can't see her." Now he looks mopey.

"See?" Tak says, "Don't you feel sorry for him?"

"No," Zim grunts, and then Tak kicks him under the counter. "Ow! What was-"

"Ice cream's here!" Pleecy shouts.

The Ice cream parlor drone hands each of them a spoon, and Pleecy, Dib and Tak immediately begin shoveling ice cream into their mouths.

"Tak," Zim hisses under his breath, "that's Earth ice cream! It could be poisoned!"

"Tastes fine to me," Tak says, and she eats another spoonful rather quickly. But then she drops her spoon on the counter, and her hands fly to her forehead and she winces.

"What's wrong!" Zim demands, with a faint sense of concern.

"Brain. . .freeze. . ." Tak moans, resting her head on the counter.

"Brain. . . freeze!" Zim echoes, the worry becoming quite apparent in his facial expression. But then he looks angry, and banging his fist against the counter, he shouts, "I knew the Earth ice cream was up to no good! It freezes brains and harvests them for slave monkeys! I demand to know who's responsible for such a horrible scheme of doom!"

"Geez Zim," Dib says, "a brain freeze is just a headache. Tak'll be fine."

"Fool boy! You speak words that are unsane!"

"It's 'insane'."

"LIES!"

"Zim, shut up," Tak growls. She hasn't even lifted her head up yet. Zim scowls, but obeys.

Pleecy gets off her stool and begins mooshing against Zim again.

"Poor, poor Zim," she coddles, "everyone's so mean to him. . ."

"Get off of me-"

"Hey hon." It's the fat bikini lady again. "Did you like my performance before? Next time you should join me. . ." the lady winks at Zim, and walks away, leaving him, Pleecy and Dib staring in sheer disturbance.

The terrified silence is only broken when Tak says, laughing quite a bit, "Wow Zim. Looks like everyone wants you!"


"Is Pleecy in here. . .?" Zim asks cautiously, closing Tak's bedroom door behind him.

Tak, who's sitting up in bed, says, "No. She's getting cleaned right now." Her expression looks confused, and then a little concerned, "Is everything alright?"

Zim, who had been standing in his usual arrogant manner, now falls to his knees and says, in a rather whiny, desperate voice, "Why don't you have jelly!"

"E-excuse me. . ."

"You do not have jelly, Tak! Why?"

"What the. . ." somehow, Tak suddenly realizes what Zim means (although she's not sure how), "Oh! You mean why am I not jealous, right? About the Pleecy thing?"

"Sure, whatever. . . why!"

Tak gets up from her bed, and gets to her own knees, right across from Zim. He looks perplexed, and still desperate.

"Zim," Tak says in a firm voice. She leans in slightly and continues, "Are you in love with Pleecy?"

Zim jumps back, mortified.

"No! Of course not! I can't STAND-"

"That's why."

"Heh?"

"I'm not jealous about you and Pleecy because I know you don't care about her."

"At all."

"Yeah, I know." Tak pauses, and then grins. "She'll realize that soon, and then she'll get over you. And leave."

"For good?"

"One can hope."

Zim grins too. He stands, and offer a hand to Tak. She accepts, and her pulls her up. They're practically frozen now. A few inches apart, still hand in hand. Tak's grin switches from shy to sweet to sly, and she leans in. Zim follows suit.

Less then an inch apart. . .
"Tak! We ran out of towels!"

Tak and Zim instinctively jump back, and drop their hands to their sides.

Standing at the entrance of the bedroom, is Pleecy. Completely naked.

The three of them stare in an awkward, stunned silence. And then they all shout at once ("God Pleecy! Get dressed!" from Tak, "S-sweet mother of Irk!" from Zim, and "Eeek! Zim, you pervert! Quit STARING!" from Pleecy).

At the same moment, Tak and Pleecy grab Zim by each of his arms, and throw him out of the room. Once the door slams shut, Tak takes in a deep breath, attempts to keep calm, but then completelt loses it.

"Why the hell were you walking around NAKED? ARE YOU FRIGGEN STUPID!"

Pleecy cowers back in intimidation.

"Tak, I was just cleaning myself, only we ran out of towels, so I had to tell you-"

"You couldn't bother to get dressed first!"

"Ew, no! My clothes are dirty!"

"Didn't you bring clean ones with you?"

"No, I left them in here."

"Why?"

"Because I thought I'd have a towel!"

Tak twitches in agitation, then falls backwards onto her bed, and sighs in disgust.

"Just get dressed," she orders, closing her eyes, "No one wants to see you naked."

End of Chapter Three. . .

XD

Next chapter. . .'Eating Dirt'. . . it will contain the following:

-an appearance of the Tallest

-Joon's comeback

-Zim getting raped

Actually, chapter four is not one of my favorites. . . oh well. . .it moves the story along..

Random crap: There's a rather large bee that I've trapped in my garage, and I'm paranoid that it'll find a way out and eat me. . . er, sting me. . .then eat me. . . I dun like bees. Or spiders. Or any arthropod, for that matter. That includes crabs. . .

Review, my loves!