So, it's explanation time, finally ;). The Order explained here, my sound familiar to the Talamasca to some of you who've read Anne Rice's novels. I didn't want to sound like it. After all, Talamasca were just observers while this Order acted upon Devil, but I'm sorry if the similarities are too strong.
Erin smiled.
"I'm the one who found your car wrecked under that semi. And you're welcome, by the way"
John continued to look at her, his expression unreadable. She sighed.
"Ooooooooookay. I work for the Order"
John shook his head
"The Order does not longer exist"
"Not in The States, it doesn't. I'm talking about the English Order. I'm sorry about Jim Murphy and Caleb, by the way. They were good men"
John's neutral expression slipped into a saddened one momentarily, before getting the mask on again.
"What do you want?"
Erin sat on the free bed. This may take some time.
"I've already told you. I want to help you"
When she saw John was about to say something, she continued.
"Look, let me explain, OK? I guess what I'm going to tell you won't come as a big surprise, knowing what you've seen and what you've faced. As I'm sure you know, the States Order was brought here as an extension of the British one on the past century. What you may not know, is that the reason the Order moved some of its members here was to fight the same Demon that nearly took yours and your boys lives tonight"
This time, when the mask slipped again from John's face to be replaced with a surprised expression, not even him was able to put it back.
"How long?"
It was Erin's turn to look surprised. John looked at her.
"How long did your Order knew about the existence of the Demon?"
Erin frowned
"I believe about thirty yea… may be more."
John's eyes turned cold at hearing that.
"Thirty years. And you couldn't do a damned thing to stop it before it killed all those people. Before it killed Mary?"
To Erin's credit, she didn't flinch much at those harsh words.
"They tried. And they were killed. They were the last ones, did you know that? The last members of the Order here in the States, died the same night as your wife. I've read the reports. They contacted the English Order to inform about the possible presence of the Demon in Lawrence. They said they were going to try and prevent the accident. That was the last thing we heard from them"
She took a deep breath.
"And considering next we knew was that Mary Winchester had been killed in strange circumstances and John Winchester had barely escaped with both his sons, we guessed they had been killed too. I'm sorry they couldn't save your wife, John, I really am, but we did what we could"
John, who had looked at the floor during part of her explanation, looked up at her again.
"Again, what do you want now?"
She got up and started pacing the room.
"Already told you. I want to help you, John"
"Why?"
Erin started feeling frustrated. If the other two Winchesters were a little like John, things would get difficult if she had to justify every little decision, action or whatever she did.
"Why you say? Have you taken a look at yourself? I want to help you because, in case you haven't noticed, your first round with the Demon didn't go quite that smoothly. Let me recount: The Demon escaped, you only have one bullet left in the Colt and you and your sons are gravely injured. Yep, I think it's 1-0 to the Demon"
John sat up abruptly.
"The Colt!"
John rubbed his forehead. Damnit, damnit, damnit! How could have he forgotten about the Colt? Who knew were it was now? Who had it? For all he knew, the Demon could have got his clutches on it and the Colt could be destroyed by now…
Erin didn't miss the fact John shot up at the mention of the Colt, not at the mention of his two sons, lying injured in another parts of the hospital. She looked at him coldly.
"I've got the Colt. And your sons are gonna be fine, by the way."
John looked again at her.
"You've got the Colt? How?"
Erin couldn't believe her ears. She straightened. Time to leave him get some rest.
"I retrieved it after killing the possessed driver who slammed his truck against your car. Don't worry, it's safe. I'm gonna check on Sam and Dean now" seeing as I see that you're in no hurry to do that.
John sighed.
"I'm worried about them. But this Demon… this could have been over this very night and now…"
Erin shot him a fierce look
"And now you've got two sons who need you. What you gonna do? Grab the Colt and leave them here alone? Is that it?"
"No" John said firmly. "But I don't… I don't think it's safe for them to come with me from now on"
Erin frowned.
"Why?"
John, who had been looking at his hands, looked at her once again. Erin was surprised to see his eyes glistening. Was he crying?
"I almost killed my son. I almost…"
Okay, Erin thought he had passed from weirdo to the Outers Limits.
"What… what are you talking about?"
"The Demon… it got into me. It was inside of me when it hurt Dean. And I couldn't do a damned thing to try and stop him. And because it was inside of me, Sammy wasn't able to shoot it and end everything. He couldn't kill it…"
"Because it would have killed you"
"I was more than willing to take that risk. It was my decision to make. To die to avenge Mary, to die to save Dean… I would have done it gladly"
Erin sat again on the other bed.
"But then, it was Sam who would have spent the rest of his life thinking he had killed his dad. Not you."
"He would have understood with time. He would have known it was the only way. I don't know how many other families has he condemned now because of this weakness"
"Weakness? I think it took a lot of courage to spare the Demon's life considering it had killed Jess. The Demon is still out alive, that's true, but you are alive and your children too. May be you should sort out your priorities."
She jumped from the bed and went to the door.
"I'm gonna check on Sam and Dean. You should try and get some rest. When you all feel better, we'll talk about the strategy to follow"
And with that she left the room. She didn't understand John. She could see why he wanted to kill that Demon so badly, she really could, but she couldn't understand how he was so willing to put the death of that monster before the security of his sons…. Sometimes, people are just crazy.
