CAMPFIRE FAVORS AND REVELATIONS
Its late evening 12 days into November 1977, following several cooler days this was second warmest day of the trip. Ennis and Jack are on their last camp of the year in the Big Horn mountains spending this ninth night around the campfire, next to the last night of their trip. An Indian summer lasting only their first full day brought midday temps into the 70's allowing Jack and Ennis to make good use of favorite swimming holes, soaking up the sun rays on the surrounding granite boulders. As always their meeting brings on an indescribable bliss, easy familiar companionship each had known only with the other. The next time together will likely not be until the following spring. The boys finished off a mess of trout caught early that morning with fried potatoes and canned green beans, were sitting close enjoying the after glow of the meal they prepared.
Ennis is pensive, has something he wants to ask of Jack before they part for the winter.
"Jack….."Jack looks to Ennis stoking the fire "Sometimes….. I think about….on the road….you driving……all the way…….and back……and I never hear………" Ennis looks away, careful with his words not to be misunderstood..
"Ennis…what is it?" Jack moves closer.
Ennis looks to Jack. "Its just that……I wonder…..I mean I know you always have a new enough truck and all…..when I see you, I know…..you…make" Ennis looks away.
"Ennis…."Pulls him close. Jack doesn't know what is getting to Ennis.
"But I …..wonder….if you……made it back…..I mean its …so far…..and if anything……….if you had any……t …..I wouldn't hear" Ennis looks down bites his lower lip.
"Its ok Ennis, I'm fine, were here…"Jack looks at Ennis not clear what he is trying to say and rests his hand on his neck.
"Could you maybe…….just……I mean I don't hear from you until……the next time we……." Ennis looks away.
"Just, what?…..whatever you want Ennis…".
Turns to Jack. "Aw hell Jack, you ever think of let 'n a fella know, you know that he made it all the way back to Childress so he don't go worry' n his self to death thinking that you 's road kill or died of thirst in the desert? Huh?" Ennis tries to look pissed. " I got my little girls growing up to worry me and I don't need to be thinking o' you at the side of the highway, Huh? Send a card? Somethin'?" Under the false bravado Jack see his eyes glisten.
Jack relieved, gently tugged at Ennis to looked him in the eyes said simply "Friend", gives Ennis a big wide grin "Don't you never give it another thought" Touched by Ennis's concern for his welfare (their welfare) more that he could fathom he shrugged and said. "You know I wouldn't let nothin' happen to keep me from...Look its ok Ennis, I always have the mechanics at Newsome's check the truck out before I leave. You know, change the oil, check the tires, belts, hoses, everything. All these years never had a breakdown, flat, or run out of gas, nothing……except 'n there was that one time when……" Jack looks into the fire. Ennis relieved but curious and concerned.
"When what Jack? " Ennis looks at Jack.
Jack silently cursing himself realizes that he led himself to say much more that he intended or would like to, but he had never lied to Ennis.
"Well…."
"Well what?"
"It was summer, three years back I think. We was in Pine Creek about a week and a half, remember?" Ennis nods, looks at Jack unsure of what he will say.
"It was one of the times I drove straight back to Childress …I was up at Lightning Flat an few days before I met up with you instead of after. Remember we were packed out and left that last morning? Well anyway I started out….got on Hwy 25.…didn't even get the first 100 miles, way before even Casper when…….when" Jack can no longer speak.
"When what?…Somethin' happen to the truck?" Ennis looking intently at Jack.
"No". Jack whispers trying to contain himself. "I...I don't know if you remember there was a storm going through that day, at least where I was.." Jack looks into the fire.
Ennis giving a worried look at Jack.
Reading Ennis's thoughts shakes his head. "No, no nothing like that" Jack claps Ennis leg.
Ennis settles a bit. Stokes the fire.
"Its was just some rain but really dark clouds and dismal lookin. And remember we went early that summer. First week in July?" Jack turns to Ennis.
Ennis nods.
"I was goin' along and started thinking……..how long it would be until…….have to wait until…..November….when…." Jack takes a breath, feels his eyes start to fill.
"What……h" Ennis looking at Jack.
"Nothing really happened, I just….just….. I just started bawling so bad ………couldn't stop….had to pull over, stretched out in the cab until I fell asleep" Jack looks into the fire.
Ennis pulls Jack close, kneads his neck and shoulder.
Jack perks up. "I must have been asleep for quite a while'. Gives wide eyed Ennis a poke in the ribs. "Sometimes I guess we don't get to much sleep on these trips, heh?". Trying to make a little joke. Ennis smiles.
"Next I knew the storm had cleared and it was late afternoon . Went outside took a piss got back in turned the key and nothin' . No click, groan, nothin'. Looked down at the dash and found I'd left the damn lights on!".
Ennis who feels on some way he was the cause of this, that he wasn't there to help is overcome by the image of Jack, his Jack, Jack who needed him to get his old truck started in Signal where it sat that long ago summer they spent together at Brokeback, Jack stranded at the side of a Wyoming highway. Ennis looks away. Jack leans forward looks at Ennis, sees a tear welling up, brings him closer strokes his back..
"Ennis, it was alright…really. It was ok. I was ok. Still was plenty of daylight left. I got out lifted the hood and got the cables out. Wasn't five minutes for someone stopped and gave me a jump and was on my way again, drove straight thru. Ennis it was ok…".
Both feeling tears clutched each other, Ennis rested his head on Jacks shoulder as the fire died down . After a time in their warm embrace Jack raises, helps Ennis up, tilts his head toward their tent "Comin' cowboy?" Ennis nods.
By a long shot it wasn't the only time before or since that Jack or Ennis found themselves on the roadside unable to see through their tears after their time together, just the only one they would ever speak of and that required some mechanical assistance needed to get rolling again.
From that trip until Jacks death Ennis always received a postcard:
"Friend
In Childress safe and sound
Jack"
When Jack was delayed in Lightning Flat later than planned there would be one as well.
"Friend
Leaving LF. You will hear from me soon.
Jack"
THE END
