Between Love and Hate

In the Previous Chapter:

"Relena?"

She froze. Her body stiffened. Her blood chilling in her veins as the icy tone of the masculine voice swept a cold numbing sensation over her tensed body.

No, this was not happening. Not now.

Terror stricken eyes swept up, shakily, to stare at the daring blonde directly in front of her, as steely orbs glared at her in a mist of confusion and alarm.

"Matthew?" Relena choked, hoarsely, her fear grasping her larynx, impelling her voice; compressing her lungs, impeding her breaths and strangling her heart as it hammered heavily in her chest.

Then, with a wave of horror, she had one final thought. 'He was back.'

-

Chapter seventeen: Growth of a Cancerous Delirium

"That's bull, man, and you know it!" Duo cried, jumping swiftly to his feet and storming across the room. Wufei stared impassively after him, onyx eyes focused carefully on the braided man's back.

Half way through his march, Duo spun around on his heel, glaring at Wufei with stiff, cold eyes. "We can't stay here, I won't allow it," he breathed quietly, before exiting the room, the glass doors swinging shut behind him with a raucous crash as the pane shattered and shards of glittering glass scattered to the tiled floors beneath.

Wufei exhaled deeply, releasing a stale breath of air that he hadn't been aware that he was holding. As he inhaled again, the repulsive stench of blood and death that repugnantly filled his lungs reminded him of his current situation and he glanced around the room, his dark eyes scanning swiftly across and taking in the masses of lifeless, pale bodies. Massacre. That's what this was. His stomach clenched tightly and he felt bile stir unnaturally, threatening to rise to his throat, but he pushed it down and walked slowly towards Trowa, his feet tapping resoundingly against the cold, gleaming tiles as he moved.

"He's right you know," Trowa mused as Wufei fell to a standstill beside him, "we can't stay here. It's reckless, we'll be leading everybody straight into jeopardy and seeing as we're basically unarmed, we'll be sitting targets the next time they decide to pay us a visit." He slumped against the wall, his green eyes dropping to study the floor and his long strands of his cinnamon hair falling to hide them from view.

"Stop being so pessimistic," Wufei growled, but without his usual adamant tone, "We still have a chance of fighting this off before something else like this happens."

"Wufei!" Trowa's head shot up and Wufei was mildly surprised to see a burning fire in those emerald green eyes, as anger adorned the usually emotionless man's face, "Stop being so naïve! Can't you see? Can't you see what they're capable of? This is just the beginning; they're testing us, showing us what they are truly capable of, and the fact that they have left not one survivor in this building, provides us with the hindsight that they can do much more than this." He shook his head, irately, "This battle has only begun … and yet, too many lives have already been lost. Do you really want to endanger any more?"

Wufei stared at him, with hard eyes, a thread of admiration growing for the taller man. It took a lot of courage to put your foot down in a situation like this; it took a lot of valour to flee, to disown the fact that only cowards fled, and yet, Wufei wasn't ready to discard his pride, after all, it seemed to be the only thing that he had left.

"Are you so naïve?" He knew that he was only going to reiterate the argument that had taken place minutes before with Duo, but he was adamant that they saw his point of view. It too had a chance of survival, and was so much more commendable than fleeing. "Do you really think that they won't find us again? They have found us, not only once, but twice, and I am positive that they will continue to seek us from our positions wherever we hide." He clenched his jaw tightly, his composure wearing off rapidly, "Why play games, Barton, when we can just cut right to the chase and eliminate them from this spot?"

Trowa grimaced. "This can't be about pride anymore. This is about life or death."

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The sirens hailed through the silence of the dark, early morning, as the police car streaked through the deserted dirt roads, often hitting loose stones and jerking to the side. Rock-strewn muck flew up, as the tires of the Rover spun against the ground, and splattered against the windows and sides of the car as the road thinned hazardously.

It was a dangerous area. Everybody knew this.

Sergeant James Patterson sat in the passenger seat, one hand clutching onto the dashboard with white knuckles, and his other grasped tightly around a steamy travel mug of hot coffee.

"Christ, Carson, can't you take these bends a little slower?" He cried as the car hit another sharp curve, and jolted to one side, narrowly missing the cliff, which gave way to the jagged rocks and crashing, sea below.

"Sorry, Serge, the Rover's not taking these mountainous conditions very easily." Officer Carson answered, nervously.

"Well, be careful; one wrong move and we'll be plummeting down to join the fish in an underwater dive."

Carson swallowed uneasily, not even chancing a glance at the violent sea.

As they neared their point of destination, Carson carefully decreased his speed, staring apprehensively at the cloud of red and blue flashing lights ahead. Ambulances and police cars herded around the area closely, and men clustered attentively near the edge of the cliff, some gazing down, wearily, and others gathering equipment from vehicles with a rapid speed. A stream of yellow police tape, stating 'DO NOT ENTER – POLICE' ran thoroughly around the area, whipping back and forth with the vicious force of the wind.

Patterson sighed deeply before turning to his accomplice with tired eyes, "What do you know so far?"

Carson shifted uncomfortably. "Local resident phoned into the station at approximately two-forty-five am and reported an accident around Herron point. She had awoken to the sound of a loud crash registering in the near distance and her and her husband dressed and made their way down here to investigate. That's all they told me before I was sent to collect you, sergeant."

Patterson swigged a heavy gulp of his coffee and nodded his head thoughtfully. "A silver BMW has been found at the scene, only one body has been reported so far, but has yet to be recovered. Got that?"

Carson nodded solemnly. He hated working on cases like this, after all, he was only a novice, and for some reason he always found himself becoming personally affected by what was happening.

"Okay, follow me." Patterson stepped out of the car and walked briskly towards the group of officers gathered at the scene, tugging his jacket closer to his body as he moved against the chilling breeze.

"Sergeant." An alert officer greeted him with a curt nod before beckoning him over to the side, Patterson turned towards Carson, gesturing for him to pursue. The officer led them both to the edge of the cliff, where he stopped suddenly, fumbling with a notepad and flicking leaves of paper over until he found the correct one. Patterson leant forward, eyeing the ledge warily before diverting his eyes to the disconcerting view below. Even in the darkness, he could make out the outline of several men, treading carefully along the banks and around the smoky rubble of what Patterson assumed to be the BMW.

"Pretty shocking, huh?" the officer asked, recognizing Patterson's concern. "There's a body. They've been able to haul it out of the wreckage. It's over there," He jerked his head to the side, where Patterson saw a group of paramedics, huddled together and working hastily with something on the ground.

Carson listened conscientiously, noticing how the officer described the body as 'it'. Classification had it that bodies were depicted as 'it' and not by their previous sexes. In his point of view, it was inhumane and completely impersonal. But maybe that was where his problem lay.

"No luck?" Patterson asked, although, by the tone of his voice, it was clear that he already knew the answer.

"No. She's dead."

They walked over to where the forensics had assembled, and Patterson dropped to squat on the ground.

Carson studied the body carefully, an overwhelming amount of remorse flooding through his own. The young girl's body was deformed beyond recognition, only a few distinguishable features remained to help the forensics determine who she was. Under the glowing rays of the moon, Carson described her as beautiful, but poetically so, for her death was nothing but another tragic loss to the world. One of the paramedics ran his hand over her dark, hauntingly lifeless eyes, closing them to the world around her, before another pulled a plastic cover over her slim, fragile body, and zipped her up.

Patterson stood up slowly, watching as the girl was slid into the back of an ambulance, ready to be handed over to the forensics.

"Have you any evidence of what happened?" He asked, turning back to the officer in charge, "An accident? Suicide?"

The officer shook his head sombrely, "No sir, we have strong reasons to believe that it was murder."

Carson blanched. He hadn't been prepared for that answer.

"Those being?"

"When the wreckage was examined carefully, we were able to find that the brakes had been disabled; the wires were cut and the pedal disjointed."

Who would do this? Carson asked repeatedly in his mind, envisioning the misshapen body of the young girl who had been brutally murdered.

"Definitely not accidental?"

"The edges of the cables were blunt, informing us that they must have been sheared."

Patterson inhaled deeply, running a shaky hand through his dark, greying hair. "Have you found any identification, whatsoever?"

"No sir. No identification of the car, but Ronny's in the van right at this minute, running a search on the registration number."

"Good, would he have anything by now?" Patterson asked.

The officer nodded his head, "Let us see."

They approached a small research vehicle, and stepping inside, Patterson found a small corpulent man, his fingers drumming heavily on the keyboard as cryptic script ran swiftly across the screen.

"The sergeant would like to know if you have anything yet, Ronny." The officer stated, before slipping, silently back out of the van.

Ronny turned his balding head to look up at the sergeant, towering above him, "Yes sir. The results on the license plate Y-U-Y-six-seven-F-eight, have been successful."

"Go on then;" Patterson prompted.

"The owner of the car is one by the name of Heero Yuy, sir. His location is currently unknown though; the database seems to have some kind of block on it. There's a message from the Preventers, saying that the information is strictly confidential."

"Dammit." Patterson growled, "Get in touch with these 'Preventers' and tell them our situation. I need to find Mr Yuy as soon as possible." He inhaled deeply before continuing, "Also, I want an autopsy report of the girl. I want her identified as soon as possible, and for God's sake, Ronny, keep the damned press away for as long as possible."

He groaned as he left the van, Carson on his tail. This was going to be a hell of a long morning.

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Quatre sunk down onto the mattress beside his sleeping wife, threading his fingers through her silky, platinum blonde locks as he reminisced on the scene downstairs. He had finally resigned from of the view, excusing himself from Trowa, and slowly and tiredly making his way up to his large, comfortable suite. When he had reached his floor, he released a breath that he hadn't known he was holding, as an overwhelming fatigue consumed his whole body. Leaning against the side of the wall for a few seconds, he was soon startled by a livid Duo, raiding past him, muttering incoherent words under his breath.

Quatre had caught fragments of the young American's argument with Wufei, all of which rose a foreboding tension over the room.

Sighing, Quatre noted mentally to check on him later … but for now. He needed to sleep.

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The wind was howling portentously through the fissures in the trees and a cold breeze was slicing harshly across her body, biting at her barely covered skin with venomous icy teeth. However, this wasn't what caused the hairs on her arms to stand on edge, or the chilling shivers to trace spirals down her back. The cause of these stood only three metres away from her, staring curiously from the shadows.

She wanted to scream, to cry for help, to do anything to keep him away from her. However, her body wasn't functioning with her brain, and her voice refused to co-operate. She felt frozen amidst the swirling world before her, and all she could see … was him.

Fear gripped her soul as she stared at his tall, muscular form, the one that held so much control over her for too many years, and yet again, she found herself succumbing to its unyielding power. She felt unbelievably weak as she watched him, waiting for him to make his next move, like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.

Matthew took a few hesitant steps forward, and each time, as his foot hit the ground with a patronising thud, Relena felt the world she had been living in spin off its axis and her head thump painfully.

He casually knelt down in front of her, his face much too close to hers for her liking and as Relena studied him, she came to wonder how she had once been in love with this man.

With a gust of wind, Matthew's dark blonde hair swept across his handsome chiselled face as disconcerting grey eyes studied her, with a mixture of confusion, amusement and passion. Relena shuddered, hating the binding feeling that he possessed over her.

Clawing at the loose ground behind her, Relena attempted to space a larger distance between the two of them, but for some reason, under Matthew's penetrating stares, her efforts were deemed futile, and she remained frozen, under the beaming rays of the moon … petrified.

"Darling …" he drawled out slowly, "What are you doing here?"

Feeling a sudden surge of confidence, Relena bit back, "I was just about to ask you the same question," she growled, "weren't you meant to be on a business trip?"

Matthew looked amused. "But I am." He reached out carefully, his thumb grazing her cheek gently, "You shouldn't be here."

The burning sensation that scalded her skin from his touch caused her to jerk her head swiftly away from him. Matthew, however, didn't seem perturbed by her action in the slightest. Instead, he stood quietly, towering over her from his height.

"Neither should you." She murmured her voice softer than last time. Matthew ignored her comment, sighing deeply and looking bored.

"What are you doing here?" he repeated, and for just a second, Relena watched as his calm exteriors faded to allow a rapid flicker of anger contort his face.

However, before Relena had a chance to answer his question, a light brushing of shrubbery in the distance alerted them of another presence. Matthew's blonde head twisted rapidly to the left, his light eyes scouting for the unwanted visitor; after a few passing minutes of careful surveillance, he turned his attention back to Relena, an odd air of uneasiness surrounding him now, replacing his earlier tranquil exterior.

"We're not done here, Relena," He said, reaching out, "I'll be back. Count on it." He grazed his icy fingers against her lips before swiftly spinning around and disappearing, stealthily out of view.

Relena, still kneeling on the leaf littered floors beneath her, was frozen to the spot. She didn't know whether to follow or not, but even if she has tried to tail him, she would have no chance of tracking him, for he had disappeared far too quickly.

Her heart was still pumping with a fearful trepidation as she slumped to the ground, feeling – as she usually did after an encounter with Matthew – completely useless and worthless. He would be back for her. That's what he had promised, and there was absolutely nothing that she could do about it.

"Relena?" Startled, Relena jumped, emerged from her thoughts and scrambled hastily to her feet, "What are you doing here?" Heero stepped out of the shadows, his full muscular figure washed with the pale white rays of the gleaming moon. His eyes were radiant with an intense curiosity as he moved closer to her, somewhat uncertainly.

"… I uhh … umm …" She stammered, nervously, before cursing herself for being so pathetic. Heero frowned deeply, faint creases etching lines into the smooth skin on his forehead as his dark eyebrows furrowed down.

"Who was with you?" Relena gasped and stared at him, looking suddenly overwhelmed, Heero cleared his throat, roughly, before clarifying, "I heard voices."

"… Uh …" Relena sniffled lightly, pursing her lips together tightly in an attempt to stifle the sob rising in her throat. "I followed him out here," she started, "I didn't think he'd be here, but he was and I didn't know what to do; I know that I should have followed, but I wasn't thinking at the time and-" Her rambling was cut short as Heero's hand clasped around her upper arm, firmly, yet soothingly. She turned to look up at him, for once, seeing through his usually impermeable barrier and reading the guise of concern drawn across his face.

"Relena, it's okay. There's nothing we can do now, but if you can tell me what they looked like, maybe it'll give us a head start." His hand drew tighter around her arm and he moved steadily closer, as an overwhelming amount of heat flushed through Relena's body at the sudden proximity.

"Matthew," Relena breathed out in a choked whisper, "Matthew Connors." She was now aware of the lump that had suddenly surfaced at the back of her throat, and the dampness that was staining her cheeks with salty tears, and she was sure that Heero was too. "He is – was my boyfriend."

Heero nodded slowly, taking it all in, and looking as though he was storing the information somewhere in his head, for later reference. Their eyes locked, and in that brief moment, Relena caught a glimmer of hope, that passed through her body, with a slight shudder … a hope that everything would be all right in the end. However, this feeling partly shattered when Heero tore his intense gaze away from her. He shrugged off his jacket, and draped it across her shoulders. Relena smiled, immediately feeling the warmth of the pre-heated material spreading through her body.

"Here," he said, rather softly. Relena inhaled deeply, she could smell the alluring, musky scent of his cologne, still lingering and clinging onto the clothing. "I don't know why you're dressed in only that," he gestured to her small, silken negligee, and the light dressing gown barely wrapped around her body, and made a soft grunting sound, "but you must be cold."

Smiling, Relena turned to him, and in a gentle voice, whispered, "Thanks, Heero."

Heero shook his head, dismissively, and laying his hand on her back, he guided her in front of him, and towards, what seemed to be, the direction of the hotel.

After a few minutes silence, Relena eventually decided to voice her thoughts.

"Why are you doing this?"

Heero, looking perplexed by her impulsive outburst, glanced towards her as he brushed a heavy branch of leaves away from his face. "Doing what?"

Relena sighed. Staring ahead, she could see the lights of the grand hotel, looming in the near distance. "Doing this; being so nice to me."

Heero shrugged, unsure of an answer to her question. "Would you rather I not?"

Relena scoffed, glaring at him steadily, before replying, "Don't turn the tables, Heero. Of course I prefer you like this, well, in comparison to the callous, egotistical jerk that you transform into more often than I'd wish. You're like some modern day version of Jekyll and Hyde."

"Apart from the fact that I don't have Schizophrenia." He added.

"Well … so you say."

Heero rolled his eyes. "I don't have any mental disorders, Relena."

Relena released a short breath of air, "I'm not too sure about that. But that's besides the point. Now, answer my question, Heero Yuy, why are you being so nice to me?"

Heero opened his mouth to retort, but Relena hastily cut him off with another warning, "And no dodging the bullet."

A smirk crept onto Heero's face, erasing his brooding appearance as he replied, "But that's what I'm best at."

Laughing, Relena playfully shoved the unsuspecting boy, and he unceremoniously stumbled into a bush.

"Just answer the damned question!"

Heero clambered out of the shrubbery, dusting off his shirt with the back of his hand, "This was my good shirt."

"Do you really care?" Relena teased.

"No." It was a short answer. But it was the truth; Heero had never cared much for clothing; Nicola bought all of his good clothes. He preferred loose cargos and his wife-beater, both of which provided him ease of movement; good for unsuspecting situations, like now. He frowned down at his dark blue shirt – the one that Nikki said matched his eyes – and dark jeans, slightly faded for a 'worn' effect.

"They're fashionable, Heero." Nikki had told him, "and besides, they make you look sexy."

"Heero!" Relena cried.

"What?" he snapped, confused by her outburst

"Answer!"

"I don't know, Relena. Truthfully, I don't. I just think that it's about time that we put the past behind us."

Relena nodded, in silent agreement, and then smiled up at him, "Okay."

"Good. We should be getting back, they're probably wondering where we are."

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Duo stormed down the hallway in a furious rage, a gust of wind tailing his every move. How could Wufei be so foolish? Was he really willing to risk so many lives just to save his own damned pride?

He exhaled sharply, disgusted. Well, he wasn't about to sit back and watch the people he loved get massacred; he may have been the God of Death in his earlier years, but now … now he had a beautiful wife and unborn child to look out for. And nothing was going to stand in his way … not even Wufei's arrogance.

As he neared the door to his room, his rage somewhat faded, and breathing in deeply he prepared himself for whatever mood that Hilde could be in. He loved her pregnancy, it was probably the best thing that had happened to him since their marriage, but sometimes her mood swings were just to whacko for even him to be able to cope with.

Sliding the plastic card key into the alleged slot, he waited until the small LED flickered green before pressing down the metal handle. The door creaked as it swung open, and Duo poked his head inside.

Empty.

He frowned, confused by the barrenness, and moved towards the bed, tossing his jacket onto a chair in the process. Glancing around, he noticed the small glimmer of yellow light, leaking out from crack of the slightly ajar bathroom door and realising that Hilde must have been bathing; he relaxed.

"Hilde, babe, are you in there?" He called, throwing himself onto the downy bedcover and tucking his hands behind his neck as he gazed up at the ceiling.

No response.

He tilted his head to the side, staring at the half-opened, white door.

"Hilde?" He asked his tone more cautious and wary than before. His heart pace was quickening to a rapid pace, the blood pounding in his veins and his breaths were becoming haste and short as he sat up on the bed.

He moved slowly towards the bathroom, noting, once again, that the door was ajar. Why would she bathe with the door open? Duo mused, silently.

Upon reaching the door, he pushed it open and instantly an icy breezed gushed past him, chilling his bare arms and causing small bumps to rise on his arms and his hairs to stand on end.

The only thing that he could hear amidst the eerie silence was the heavy thud of his heart, echoing as it thumped against his ribcage. As he took one-step inside, the cold callously greeted him and he shuddered. Surely, Hilde wouldn't bathe in such cold conditions, he thought before his eyes caught an odd sight out of the corner of his eye. The intricately designed, misted window was lying wide open, inviting the bitter wind inside with open arms.

He trailed his eyes across the room, to where he knew the bathtub would be, but as his eyes captured the view in front of him, he gasped, starting backwards with a few paced steps, before freezing in shock.

Nothing could have prepared him for the sight that was before his eyes. A weak, muffled sound broke out from his lips as he came to life again, his immediate reaction to the scene causing him to fling his body towards his deathly pale wife.

Hilde's naked, fragile body was submerged below the surface of the water, her head propped up against the edge and lolled backwards in an awkward fashion. The water surrounding her was tainted a crimson red, murky streams of blood running from her body, but even that wasn't enough to drown out the hauntingly, pale blue hue to her usually flawless skin.

Duo thrust his hands into the white ceramic bath and was mildly surprised to find that the swirling red liquid was still lukewarm; he clambered recklessly into the bath and fished the top half of her exposed body out of the water, resting it fully against the side of the bath, whilst her legs still dangled lifelessly in the water.

His heart was hammering as his hand cupped her pallid, cold face and his thumb caressed her cheek gently; his fingers rubbing over her dry blue lips before the iciness of her skin propelled him into action. He glided his hand along her soft arm and down to her fingers, where they grazed against her wrist, but as he was searching for her pulse, a soft sticky substance distracted him from doing so. His eyes quickly dived down to the scene, his breath catching in his throat as he watched his fingers shake, uncontrollably, each one covered with Hilde's sickeningly red blood.

His head spun, and he found himself gasping for breaths … for control … he grasped out, pulling Hilde's body to his, before the world blackened before him and he tumbled to the floor, unconscious.


'...love from one being to another can only be that two solitudes come nearer, recognize and protect and comfort each other.' -- Han Suyin (Elizabeth Comber)

'Hatred ever kills, love never dies. Such is the vast difference between the two. What is obtained by love is retained for all time. What is obtained by hatred proves a burden in reality, for it increases hatred.' -- 'Mohandas K. Gandhi

A/N - Hey there. So terribly, terribly sorry for the delay, but this chapter was pretty hard to write; I just couldn't think of how to set it out for some reason. However, even though it was a struggle, I'm pretty proud of it. (smiles) Yup yup; I am.

So yeahh, how long has it been? Four months? Give or take a few. Eeeeeep, I'm so sorry! But to make up for it … I made this chapter extra long.

Anyways, yeaaah. Review and I'll update the next super fast. I already have the plot of it set out and a few ideas in my head. Oh … and the ending of BLaH. Yep … I know how it's going to end … heehee. Give me cake and I might consider spilling the secret (grins).

Love you guys more than you know!

Allura