Disclaim me do rey mi fa so la ti do. I don't own Ranma or Tenchi or any thing else that may be hinted at in here. So much fanfiction has been written that is guaranteed that anything I write is probably plagiarism of some sort.
A Wild Horse and His Cabbit

Hello Prince Herb

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A/N Now that they are in Japan, the Chinese Amazon names will be as they are in the manga.

"Soon Ranma can be a man again and I can make him take us ta my old friend's home ta honor our agreement. If the boy's safely married, I should be able ta get No-chan ta forget about that damned contract." A bottle of sake chose that moment to spill its contents into Genma's lap. He growffed and glumly began to eat the bamboo that had replaced the food at the table. 'My life sucks.' he signed to no one in particular. A certain cabbit ship snickered to itself privately.


Cologne appeared in a wooded hollow just below the peak of the mountain. A brief shower from the heavy clouds above struck, leaving a bedraggled rat with long flowing white hair holding onto a gnarled staff. "I have to speak to the Jusenkyo products R&D about making their soap more effective." She saw a light coming from the clouds, resting on a teakettle shaped rock formation on the peak. "I guess that's where I go."

As she pogoed up the mountainside, Cologne noticed that four crystal spires protruded from the canopy and lightnings jumped from the clouds to the spires, crawling over them, leaving a lambent glow. The sheer power radiating from the crystal constructs nearly overwhelmed her. She fought down the urge to prostrate herself in worship as her ancestors might have. Even the mighty Saffron would have to bow before a display such as this, if he knew what was good for him.

Cologne crested the cliff and made her way through a dark copse toward the peak when something smelling of rotten fruit hit her on the snout. A gravelly growl escaped her throat as more objects hit, some smelling much worse than decaying fruit. Her aura flared, lighting up the undergrowth, revealing some apes caught in the act of grabbing more ammunition from their behinds. A quick ki blast sent them scattering, chittering in fear for their lives.

A few minutes of steady pogoing found her at the bottom of the teakettle formation. "Rotten fruit and excrement, beehives triggered to fall, and four traps that I actually was able to avoid. I'm tired of putting up with this Musk designed nonsense." Cologne touched the base of the teakettle formation.

The spout split into halves that fell to either side of the matriarch, as hot water flowed over the matriarch. A sound like a bell ringing echoed across the glade. Cologne took the kettle off of her now human head. Pressing a button on the communication crystal, she said, "I've got it, now get me out of here!" The ancient woman began to rise and then vanished in a beam of light.


Cologne reappeared on the main deck. She noted that, though she was soaked, she was human and the smell had nearly been washed away and the bee stings were less irritating as her ki flushed the poisons from her body. The open water kettle vanished from her hands and a ghostly hologram of LinOhki now stood before her. A monitor scrolled text which read, "Elder Cologne, thank you for retrieving the kettle. I am about to test it out and you will have some company shortly. Please don't offend our guests too much during the short time that they will be here. I intend to return them home as soon as I can and don't intend to have them damage any of my components. If I am injured enough to have to return to my small form you will all have a long drop."

She turned to the table and was pleased to see a decent banquet spread out. The panda saw his bamboo vanish and dropped a sign with "Huh?" scribbled on it as he vanished himself. A holographic LinOhki appeared on a pedestal at the head of the looked up and saw that the cloud cover was gone and the sky was again black and full of stars.

Ranma awoke to find herself curled up between Shampoo and Mousse in a bedroom with a view of stars on one wall. She carefully and silently disentangled herself from the two girls and made her way to the entrance of the room that had formed around them while asleep. She took in the view and saw Cologne well below at the table. Ranma sent her will out to touch Lin-chan.

'Ranma, I'm so glad you've awakened. I hope you don't mind that I was putting our plan into action without you. We have the kettle that will unlock the curse, but I want to test it first on the prince.'

'That's okay Lin-chan, I trust you. Together we can do anything…and will, no matter what little brother sister! However...'


LinOhki closed the door to the bedroom to protect Shampoo and Mousse from harm and to reduce the variables. Ranma floated down to the pedestal forming beside LinOhki's holographic projection. Once Ranma was seated on her pedestal, she looked at LinOhki's projection and raised an eyebrow in an unconsciously cute manner.

'Yes, you can do this too. I'll show you how.'

The two cabbits passed information between themselves until a lightbulb appeared over Ranma's head. 'Thanks, Lin-chan, I create a projector pattern in subspace and only expose the transmitter lens like this…' an image of Ranma in her Amazon warrior garb appeared beside her cabbit self. Then the image wavered and Ranma's male self was standing there, looking as real as if he were physically there. Cologne looked at Ranma oddly. He spoke, "What? Can't I at least appear to be like I once was? It's just a video construct." The expression on both of his and her faces took on an aura of restored confidence. For the first time she miyahed happily as her projection just smiled.

Cologne replied, "That's not what has my curiosity piqued. You are now, apparently, of the same species as our friend LinOhki."

Ranma looked down in grief. His image spoke, "Yeah. The magic of the spring wasn't finished with us. We don't know all that it has done, but for now, this is my locked form."

Glancing at LinOhki, Ranma's projection said, "Its time."


Herb jerked into awareness of her changed surroundings in a white room that had what looked like comfortable furnishings and a wall that looked like a window. Getting up from the comfortable western style bed, she went to the window to look out upon an astonishing vista. The stars were far more brilliant than she had ever seen and looking down, she saw a world with swirling clouds and blue water. 'How is it that I am in the heavens? There is Japan, just like in the text book.' Going against the distortion free glassy material she looked to the side and saw crystalline spires extending out into the void. Suddenly, the scenery began to shift and the view of the earth slipped from view to show the moon, larger and in greater detail than she ever imagined.

Something told her to look around and she saw a door iris into existence from what had been a blank wall. What ever the surface was that she stood on, a multicolored stripe led from her feet to the door. Sensing no ill will, she cautiously followed the stripe into a blank hall. Behind her, the door disappeared as if it had never existed. Hoping to find whoever was responsible for this "castle in the sky", she followed the stripe to the end of the long hall.

Coming out of the hall's exit, Herb was stunned by the size of the chamber that she was in, overhead, was a tremendous, blue tinted dome. Crystalline objects 'floated' about, some emerging from the walls, some merging or passing 'through' each other. The floor was slick like polished, seamless ceramic and about a hundred feet away was a table with an old woman seated by what appeared to be a young man and two animals on pedestals. The old crone was dressed in the manner of the Joketsuzoko elders of her homeland. Of the others, only one of the creatures was giving off any ki.

As she approached, the young man spoke in Japanese, "Its time."

The old woman looked at her, speaking in Mandarin, "Welcome Prince Haabu to starship LinOhki." She pointed to the cabbit's image. "This is Ranma, also known as Maolin." Cologne gestured to both the one strange creature that seemed alive and the boy. "I am KhoLun, matriarch of the Joketsuzoko, whom you 'should' be familiar with." The last was followed by a short cackle.

"Since you know who I am and probably why I am on my quest, could you tell me where my retainers are, as well as the treasure that belongs to my tribe?"

Cologne looked to Ranma and bowed slightly before Ranma's projection spoke, in Japanese. "Prince Herb, if you would come over here to stand, we will cure the condition of your locked form, then discuss the fate of your 'treasure'."

As Herb stood where indicated she was showered with hot water that drained away into holes that weren't there seconds ago. He smiled at the return of his maleness and dried himself off with ki. "Now that I am restored in body, please restore my men to me as well as my treasures, as it is obvious that you have the Kaisufu as well."

Ranma took on a sheepish look and rubbed the back of his head, "Wellll…ya see I can't do that, 'cause Lin-chan there ate them."

The now male prince was furious. "You 'will' restore my property to me, peasant!" Herb grabbed at Ranma's shirt to pick him up and passed right through, feeling just a tingle.

"Uh. Prince. I don't think ya want ta do that sorta thing here. Do ya wonder what its like on the other side of that dome? Lin-chan and I can show ya."

"And what is it like 'out there' that I should be afraid of? I am the descendant of ki dragons and flight is something with which I am familiar!" His aura began to flare.

"Have ya noticed how 'high' we are? Ya should know that air gets thinner the higher ya go, and, out there, there is none."

Cologne took the opportunity to inject her comment into the degrading conversation, "Prince Haabu, please listen to Ranma dono, he means no actual harm and can back up anything he says."

Herb took this in and felt the almost palpable fear in her aura. His own aura deflated at this realization.

Ranma's image spoke, "Prince Herb, we'll give ya enough of both kinds of water ta take care of yer needs for a long time. Just accept that your 'treasures' are part of Lin-chan now. After all, we did restore ya." Ranma looked distracted for a moment. "Right Lin-chan. My partner thinks that ya might be more friendly if ya know how strong we are. Wanna blow up a deserted island? And your men can watch with ya."

Herb was disoriented by the direction that the conversation took, and doubly so when Mint and Lime appeared in a flash of light.

"I'll never get used to that." Commented Cologne.

"Your Highness!" chorused the idiot duo, "Where'd your titties go? Can you bring them back?"

Herb's aura flared up again, "Can you please put them back where they were? I don't think I can take any more of this."

"Sure." Flash. The dumb asses were gone.

Herb sweat dropped and then noticed that the scenery outside the dome was different. There was now a horizon and in the distance was a smoking volcanic island. Ranma said, "Prince Herb, Pops always said that the best way ta cut down on the challenges was ta make sure the wannabes knew just enough about how strong ya were ta keep em from doin anything foolish. I figure that island is as big as yer kingdom, right?"

"Yeesss. I suppose it might be."

"Well, watch Lin-chan test out her standard weaponry on that uninhabited island."

A hum began at a low pitch, rising slowly. Clouds began to gather on all sides but the one facing the island. Lightnings crawled across the surfaces of the visible spires until beams shot from the tips of each, hitting a point in front of the living ship, creating a ball of energy that grew in size and brightness, finally being released as a ravening engine of destruction toward the volcanic mountaintop. Herb started shivering as he realized what he was being shown. The island imploded, leaving a great hole in the ocean that filled and exploded with a roar that even LinOhki couldn't dampen as cold water struck the exposed magma. She staggered in the air as she took on the new neutronium ammunition that she had just created. She felt that the weapon that created an even more terrible weapon would show the arrogant prince his place.

"Impressed?" The prince's jaw had dropped. Cologne was on the floor, twitching, eyes staring ahead.

"Yes. Very. The water will be an excellent exchange, if we can have more on request. Could I propose an alliance?"

"Okay, I won't blow up yer country if ya don't attack my other friends or yer neighbors and I'll help out if anyone attacks you without cause. How's that?"

"I suppose that will have to suffice." He bowed as one equal to another and Ranma's image and Ranma herself returned the bow in kind.

"Well, let's get ya home." The scenery shifted wildly and thirty minutes later Herb was in the courtyard of his palace with two huge crystalline containers of water.


'That went well. Only had ta blow up an island ta avoid a fight.' She became depressed, 'A few months ago I'da taken on all comers, but this ain't a body ta fight with!' A few tears leaked from her eyes as she began to curl up in grief and shame as her projection winked out.

LinOhki saw what was happening and teleported the resident catgirls to a couch, where they woke up to see LinOhki's projection miyahing and pointing at Ranma. Shampoo and Mousse rushed to gather Ranma in. Cologne quietly spoke, "Ranma, shouldn't you use the unlocking kettle's water yourself?"

Ranma's projection returned to existence, "But I did use it just before I showed up here. Lin-chan wanted ta wait till after testing it on Herb, but I wanted the curse unlocked." The projection winked out.

Genma walked into the area to a somber tableau. He farted loudly, scratched his rump and signed, "Why the long faces…somebody die?"


Later.

"Okay, everyone listen up. We're going to put down at mount Horaisan at a decent campsite. Lin-chan will provide supplies and shelter. Meanwhile, she and I have to take care of some business. Don't wander off and don't worry."

The group settled into the campground on a ledge below the mountain's crown. The tents, or pavilions, were lined up under the overhang. To Ranma's frustration, she found that she had been unable to transform back to her human form. LinOhki suggested that a threshold had been crossed and the ability would be restored for both of them after got enough Masu, whatever that was. The details hadn't been imparted, though, and she just had to trust her partner.

"For some reason, I can't become human again for a while. It hurt my feelin's when when I couldn't change back. Lin-chan says I need more mass or somethin like that. Maybe that's why I'm so hungry. Anyway, this is a part of the curse finishing development and I have ta see it through."

"Boy, I hope ya hurry up an get ta where ya can change back ta yerself soon. We gotta go visit an old friend of mine in Nerima. Tendo Soun and I have an honor pact ta fulfill an your gonna have ta be there ta do it."

"What's this about honor, male. From what I've seen, your 'honor' is in tatters." Said KhoLun.

"I'll have ya know that this is a agreement from before tha boy was born and involves two schools."

"Does the child know about this 'agreement'?"

"He'll do what he's bound ta do by honor!"

"Shampoo's sister no have to listen to too too stupid male panda!"

"I have to agree with her on this. Xian Pu and I believe that Ranma must make her own decisions." added Mousse.

Ranma listened, but shrugged her tiny shoulders and communed with LinOhki, who was preparing to embark. Ranma spoke from the monitor, "Whatever, ya all stay here and we'll be back soon, hopefully within a week." Ranma's image disappeared and Ranma flew up into the cloud cover that hid LinOhki, leaving them all to contemplate the changes that had happened in such a short time.