Author note: Well I'm back from my trip, and I'm glad to be back. I missed typing for you a lot, so here's an update.

Stephen stared down at me oddly and then took off. Erica was too shocked to even move. She stared at me strangely and watched as I returned to not speaking.

I was able to move and talk, and do as I please, I just didn't want to. I wasn't "petrified" or "shocked", I was worried. I was worried because I was almost convinced to kill my friends, and almost convinced that they didn't truly care about me.

I still couldn't get over the feeling of that hand on my shoulder, and the scratching on the wall. I couldn't get over that scared feeling that possessed me entirely. Fear wasn't something I felt often, and I felt beyond fear.

For hours I just laid in the infirmary, thinking of what is happening with Stephen and Spot. I wanted to believe that my dream was just a dream, but it seemed so real that I wasn't sure to believe…

I walked along the docks, shivering with complete fear. The bandage on my wrist was gone and my number was exposed to the world. The voices were still talking to me as I walked further towards nothing.

I stopped walking and stared confusedly at a figure looking out at the water, his hands shoved lazily in his pockets. It was Spot.

It was foggy, and the sun was setting out in the distance. The only thing I could see was him and the dock.

A dark, bulky figure suddenly appeared out of the fog, and approached an oblivious Spot Conlon. It was a man, I could see that, but he was nothing but a dark figure. He limped steadily towards Spot, his feet not even making the least bit of noise on the docks.

I crossed my arms over my chest and licked at my lips. The figure slowly disappeared. I flinched in surprise and looked around.

"Spot?" I said, looking back at the Brooklyn leader.

Spot slowly turned his head towards me, a relaxed look on his face. "Hey," he said, not even moving out of place. "What are you doin here?"

I stayed where I was and looked around. "I don't know," I told him.

Spot smiled faintly and shrugged. "Cromwell jus' left; said he had ta go see you."

"What for?" I asked, taking one step closer. He was still a good distance away.

"Dunno. He said you were hoit in yer school's hospital," Spot told me. "Why are you here?"

I furrowed my eyebrows, but I didn't get to answer him. The figure returned out of the fog, carrying something with him. It looked like a body, but I couldn't tell whose.

He placed the body onto the dock gently behind Spot, and I stepped back in horror.

"You alright?" Spot asked.

"Kill him," a voice said.

"Stop it!" I said.

"Kill him…"

I shook my head angrily and closed my eyes tightly. I looked back up in time to watch the figure shove Spot forcefully into the river. I jumped forward and felt his fingertips brush against mine, but I didn't catch him.

I looked over the side and looked around. Spot didn't resurface. The figure picked up the body and threw it into the river next. He looked at me shortly before turning and walking back into the fog.

"Spot!" I said, looking down.

I saw bubbles surface, but no Spot. Right where he had landed was a bundled up fish net…

I groaned at the memory and found myself rising from bed. Erica was gone, and none of the nurses were around. I pushed the sheets off of my body and rose wobbly.

I quickly pulled on my shoes and walked out of the infirmary, not even telling anybody. I left the building eagerly and walked into Brooklyn. I found myself at the docks in a matter of minutes to find it crowded with newsboys.

"Where is Spot?" I asked one as I approached him.

"Hospital," the boy answered.

I didn't let him finish as I turned around and headed for the hospital. I could still feel my fingertips brushing against his, and the water splashing onto my skin.

I pulled open the door to the hospital and entered with a small run. A nurse slowly past me, and I stopped her right before she disappeared out of sight.

"Spot Conlon?" I asked.

"Over there," she said, pointing.

I turned around and felt relief when I saw Stephen standing beside Blade, and Blade standing beside Spot. I hesitantly walked towards them, and noticed that they were talking to one of the doctors. Spot was fully dried – although his hair looked damp – and held a look of annoyance.

I slowly approached the three boys; their backs turned to me, and smiled slightly.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, making Stephen and Blade jump. Spot just turned around boredly and stared at me.

"Anomie," Stephen said awkwardly. "What are you doing here?" He looked amazed at my sudden "recovery".

"Just dropping by," I said casually with a shrug.

Spot looked back at the doctor with a glare and then walked for the door. I followed after him slowly, and didn't even notice that Stephen and Blade were still talking with the doctor.

Spot walked out of the hospital and stepped out into the slightly crowded streets. I followed, humming to myself, just enjoying the small walk. Spot needed to walk off his anger, so I was letting him.

We walked for hours, just turning corners, and going down random streets. Spot had no intention on trying to lose me. He knew I was there.

After three hours of just walking, me a few feet behind, he finally stopped. He still didn't look at me but spoke. "Thought you were hoit?"

We were in the middle of the street on one of the rich streets, houses lined up. I sat down carelessly on the sidewalk and stared up at him.

"Nah," I said, leaning back.

He finally looked at me, and soon turned to me fully. He slowly sat down beside me and seemed to be thinking.

"Stephen came right aftah I was pushed into da river. Said dat he didn't see who pushed me in."

"Was there a body?" I asked, staring at the house across the street.

Spot looked over at me briefly. "Yeah," he said. "It was one of my newsies."

I sighed shortly. "Sorry to hear."

"Stephen told me…dat you saved me. He said dat you sent him aftah me," Spot said.

I shrugged to myself and pushed a strand of hair out of my eyes. "I just had a dream is all," I said.

"I felt someone's hand trying to catch me," he said.

I snapped my head towards him, wide-eyed. "What?" I asked.

He didn't answer. Instead he pulled my hand towards him and ran his across it gently. I stared at him, shocked and confused.

"Felt like yer hand," he soon answered.

"That's not possible," I said, not even trying to hide the shock in my voice.

"So you were there," Spot said, smirking.

"Not really," I told him. "Only in my dream."

"Why did you try ta save me, anyways? You hate me, remember?"

I furrowed my eyebrows and looked over at him. I had forgotten all about hating him and switched into worry mode. I felt a little surprised at that, actually, because I barely knew him. I don't know if I consider him a friend or ally, or a foe either. What I did know was that I needed to save him.

Spot noticed the sudden change of mood and his smirk deepened.

"I guess I was just being nice," I shrugged. "I had my opportunity to be a hero, so I did it. Nothing changes between us because you're still an ass."

"Out of yer opinion, Anorm," Spot said.

I rolled my eyes. Great, now we were back to going at each other's throats. I sighed inwardly and stared back off at the house across the street. Its shutters were a bright red, which stood out the most. It was a fair house, two-stories high, and had a nice little garden out in the front.

The memory of my mother's garden flashed into my head, and I sadly looked away. I could still smell the freshly picked flowers she always gathered every Sunday morning. The vases she bought were always so beautiful when she put the flowers in them.

I could feel Spot's eyes boring into me, creating a deep hole into me. He looked straight through me, and I was a fool to let him.

"Who are you missin, Parker?" he asked.

"Just leave me alone," I said, rising from the sidewalk.

I began to walk down the empty street, and I could hear Spot following. He appeared at my side, just looking ahead.

"I didn't get ta thank you," he said hesitantly. "For, uh, savin my life."

"It's a constant job for me, Conlon, I don't want your thanks," I said.

"You just won't let anyone in, will you?" he asked.

"What's the use? Everybody just dies in the end anyways," I mumbled.

"Well, dat's why you enjoy da time you have," Spot told me.

"Well not many people I know get to do that," I hissed. "And I don't either."

Spot raised his eyebrows and chuckled. "Only because you won't take da time ta get to know someone."

"Conlon, I'm the worse person to get along with, so why do you keep trying?" I asked.

"You can be a nice person, Anomie, and you know you can. Quit putting a wall between us and jus' let me in. It ain't gonna hoit ta try to be friends with me. I mean, I know you don't want to argue with me all da time, dat's why you saved me."

"And that's why I'm leaving," I said silently.

I can't get too close, Spot, I just can't. I want to be friends with you, but I can't…I never can… I thought sadly.

Spot grabbed my arm and made me face him. "I'm glad yer not like da rest of dem goils, Parker. It wouldn't be fun ta mess with ya," he said.

Just admit it, Conlon, I thought to myself. You're growing attached. Just as bad as me.

And that's when it hit me; harder than anything before. I felt fear rise into me, more fear than I ever felt before. Not even the dungeons could make me as scared as I was now. I wanted to hit myself in the head and say: "duh!" The only reason I hated him so much, was to hide from him and myself the truth – I was attracted to him.

I looked over at him in fear and worry. Never in my life did I have to deal with feelings like these, and never in my life did I ever think of loving someone. The only reason he could "feel" my hand was because we were connected. The only reason we argued was because we were too stubborn to look for the truth. The only reason I was mad because of what he said was because I was jealous. All of this lead up to one thing: Spot Conlon made me fall for him in a matter of weeks.

If I were thinking this just a few weeks ago, then I'd laugh so loud that the world would stop and listen. I would've died before admitting to having feelings for this self-concerned boy. Now I didn't wonder why I smiled because of him, and I don't wonder why I fought with Madeline.

Spot looked over at me, and I met his eyes. I found myself chuckling, and then it turned into laughing.

"Are you okay?" he asked. He actually looked quite amused.

"Not exactly," I said, calming myself down.

"Care to explain?" he asked.

I stopped walking, which made Spot stop as well.

I got too close, I thought. And now I'm experiencing feelings I was forbidden to experience.

"I have to go home," I said slowly. "My father wants to start being a father, so I think I have to go..."

Spot furrowed his eyebrows as we continued to walk. "Still hate me, Anorm?"

I smiled at the name "Anorm" and just now realized how cute it was. But I soon frowned just remembering Ned.

"I'm sorry, Spot, but I just can't get close to you," I said.

"Huh?" he asked confusedly.

He looked down at me and his eyes softened. His lips formed into a handsome smile, one in which made me return the favor. I'd probably get punished for just smiling at him, but it was worth it. The punishments were dreadful, but the feeling in my stomach devoured that feeling.

Spot slowly and carefully leaned forward. He stopped every few seconds until his face was mere inches from my own. His breath was warm, and his eyes were mesmerizing.

"Would you hit me if I kissed you?" Spot asked in almost a whisper.

I closed my eyes and let out a small sigh. I slowly pushed down the wall between Spot and I. The rules were still lingering in my mind, and I suddenly didn't care anymore. Nothing Ned could do would ever make this feeling vanish.

"Only if you don't," I whispered back.

I wasn't sure if he heard me because he just stood there, as if debating over this. He then moved forward ever so carefully and the only space between us no longer existed. The feel of his lips made me become weak for the first time ever. I placed my hands onto his chest and moved them to around his neck.

I could feel his hands roaming my back as we stood there in the middle of the street. In the back of my mind I could hear my mother's sweet laughter of joy. I could feel the feeling Erica held for Blade, and I could taste Spot's lips.

I never imagined myself like this. I only concentrated on saving Daniel everyday of my life. I only followed this "love" rule because I thought there wasn't anybody out there for me. I could do just about anything, but I couldn't find my common sense at this time.

It was a lifetime before Spot slowly pulled away, still inches from my face, breathing lightly. I swam back to reality and nearly fell backwards when I realized what I just did. Spot stared at me oddly as he tightened his grip on me.

I could already see Ned's face. I was going to get the punishment of a lifetime. If Erica was supposed to get locked in a room for just being around a boy, what would happen if I was seen kissing one?

Next Chapter: Anomie is called to Ned's office. It's time for the deadly favor…

Author note: Okay, so, this chapter was a bit of a surprise. Do you think I did that too early? I was a bit hesitant about the kiss, I'm not sure if it was the right time.