A/N: Hi everyone! Just want to quickly let you know the never ending time jumps are over and I'm going write maybe 1-3 scenes per chapter now on. Hope you're being careful and taking care of yourself during these tough times!
Beta: Linux-Ginny and Devoid Black
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and Naruto.


Chapter 3: In Nooks and Corners

'In every nook and corner
Cold remains:
Plum blossoms'
-Buson (1716-1784)

There was a heaviness in his chest and he could not breathe. Then, with a sense of urgency that he could not quell, his eyes shot open and he turned to his side to dispel water from his mouth on to the wooden flooring. He coughed and spluttered, unable to shake the queasy feeling of being drowned. "What.. what…?" he groaned in confusion, as he began to notice a quiet murmur of voices around him, along with the sensation of being rocked.

Tom braced himself and slowly looked around to take stock of his surroundings. It was completely unlike him to be taken so off guard and found unconscious; more so, in what felt like foreign territory. He racked his brain for an explanation, all while trying not to give in to panic.

The sky was a kind of vibrant pink and orange that you would never find in England. He could smell brine in the air; a full mast was visible in his line of sight, and a shore in the distance boasted of a sandy beach and high cliffs. A tan hand halted his observations by waving pompously in front of his face, and he looked up into the brown eyes of a kind looking Asian man.

"Hullo… Are you alright?" The man said in fluent Japanese, his eyes crinkled in concern.

Tom's brain gave an almighty lurch and like the last piece of a puzzle slotting in, comprehension dawned. A map.. the yellow meat shop.. the white light… 'Secrets of the past you should know better than to touch…' A faded voice whispered in his brain. His gray eyes sharpened into focus. He unsteadily got to his feet and the men.. the crew, his mind supplied, around him shifted back to give him some space. His hands flitted to check his left forearm for his wand in its holster and for the shrunk trunk in his damp and traditional Wizarding robes. Satisfied with finding his belongings on his person, he turned his attention to the crew on the ship.
"Where am I?" He asked authoritatively, his Japanese was accented. The man who had spoken earlier, obviously the spokesperson, answered him readily enough.

"Just offshore from Nami. We bring a shipment of supplies from Kirigakure no Sato… For days, we have been getting a strange feeling, as if we were being watched. We sailed as fast as we could. About an hour ago, we saw something dark in the water; we thought it was driftwood…" He then trailed off awkwardly, uncertain how to bring about questioning a strange man they rescued from the water. "Are you Shinobi, sir?" He asked haltingly.

Merlin. That's more questions than answers. Bewildered, Tom tried to put things into perspective. I have been transported to a different location, that much is obvious, even if the magic apparating me dumped me right in the middle of an ocean. Where exactly this is, I cannot ascertain yet. And the names… they feel unfamiliar. I'm sure I would have remembered names as conspicuous as Wave or Hidden Village of the Mist. His dialect feels different too. And..

"What on earth is a Shi-No-Bi?" he asked, frowning.

The men visibly relaxed around him. The leader chuckled nervously.
"Aa… never you mind that. What with the war and everything, you can never be too careful of mercenaries, we are only civilians after all!"

Realization dawned as Tom realized he had been talking to muggles, and that whoever these Shinobi were, they were most probably magical. Tom had to pause at that, he looked calculatingly at them trying to derive the implications of Mercenary Magicals. He assessed their clothing and outdated technology of the deck he was standing on. His brain was trying to tell him something, to connect some major dots but it refused to enlighten him just yet.

Unable to put a finger on the discrepancy, he was about to question his rescuers a little bit more when a barrel standing off to the side on the small ship, rocked and then knocked over another barrel. They both then tumbled to the ground making quite the ruckus and they flew open to spit out two children on to the deck, a girl and boy; they could not be more than four years old.

Both seemed to be fitted in mesh clothing under loose blue clothes that were wrapped in bandages. The girl had long braided red hair and something twanged in Tom's chest in remembrance, though he could not recollect why. She opened her green eyes and glared at the pale boy with obsidian eyes and black hair that was cropped so short that it became spiky.

There was a dramatic pause.

"You complete idiot!" The little girl glared daggers into the boy. Tom sympathized; he endured fools everyday after all. And that little idiot had managed to blow their cover at... whatever sneaky thing they were sneaking at by knocking their barrels over and revealing them.

The boy rubbed his head in consternation and groaned, exposing his alarmingly jagged teeth. He did not respond to her, however.

"You!" The boy snapped, pointing towards Tom. "How do you not know what a Shinobi is?"

Bemused, and now having more subjects to interrogate, Tom readily took a step forward to begin his investigation, but was rudely cut short by the muggles.

"How did you little runts get on my ship?" The leader cried angrily. The men began to crowd the children. Not seeing how this concerned him, Tom leaned lightly against the rail, waved his hand subtly to dry himself and then turned to observe.

"You can't talk to us like that! We were only trying to escape!" The red-haired girl exclaimed.
Both the children looked agitated and cornered.
Were they telling the truth? Tom mused. What were they escaping from?

"What are your names?" said one man, picking up the boy by his scruff.

"Let me go!" The boy began kicking violently, while the little girl shrunk into a corner.

"We'll see what the Mizukage says about two little runaway shinobis, eh?" said another man nastily. "After all, nothing good ever happened to missing-nins."

Tom's jaw clenched at that and he cursed his lack of observation. The magical cores on these children were small, but very much present. Something about all of this is painfully familiar to Tom, being exorcised by priests for being a monster was not something one forgot easily.

"Enough," he said. It was quiet but heard over the din and the crew whirled around to face him.

"See!" The little boy said happily. "How could he possibly not know what a Shinobi is, he's leaking killing intent all over the place!" He giggled.

The gaping crew leader snapped his mouth shut. "You said you weren't a Shinobi!" He accused, pointing a finger at him. "Why did you lie to us? What are your affiliations?"
All of the men were looking at him quite distrustfully now. And as if this was cause for an alliance, the two children ran through the throng of men, blurred behind Tom and peered from behind his legs to face them.

Tom blinked slowly. I did not sign up for this.

He wanted to protest quite vehemently at guarding anything, let alone something as cumbersome as two little lives, when something roared from behind him, shaking the entire ship and casting a long shadow on the deck. Ignoring the quaking men whose attention was on something directly above him, Tom turned slowly in resignation to face this new threat.

For a moment, Tom just stared at a very large and almost comically orange fish in front of him.
"The Mighty Kiri Carp!" The red-haired girl murmured in reverence. Tom looked blank.

"Is this something we would have to... fight?" He wondered dubiously. While over-sized animals weren't scarce in the Magical World, he had yet to actually slay one because, he thought back; when it came down to it, I got away with coercing my Basilisk instead of battling her.

The dark-haired boy looked at him disbelievingly. "Of Course you have to fight it! The Mighty Kiri Carp has slain hundreds in his hunt. There are actual Jounin who have been felled by this beast!"

This kid is hyperventilating, Tom thought detachedly, as he filed away more new terminologies in his head. Tom noticed how the boy said 'You' have to fight it instead of 'We'. He exhaled noisily, wanting to get done with this and get a better understanding of his situation as fast as he could. Fine. If I must do this.

He began scanning the bloated, orange carp and assessed that it was easily two to three stories tall and quite noisy with its attack. The belly... it is abnormally large, he noted in disgust. Then, flicking his left arm to grab on to the handle of his wand, he gave an experimental wave. "Stupefy," he said softly.
To his utter shock, the giant monstrosity actually dodged his attack! It was faster than expected.

The fish let out a blast of magical aura that hovered like death in the air. The men and children aboard the ship shrank back to a corner as the ship rocked dangerously. "I told you I felt eyes on us," Tom heard a man whisper from behind him.

He chuckled quietly to himself. Is this supposed to scare me?
He called his magic, making it cover him like a warm blanket.

He then grit his teeth, fell into a natural dueling stance and fired off 5 stupefies in quick succession, placed such that they hit in the shape of an unsymmetrical pentagon, and thus hit the beast no matter which direction it moved.

He was more than a little disappointed that only one hit its target, given the superior agility of the creature. He tracked its movement resignedly as the red light bounced off the thick scales of fish.

His audience broke out in shouts of dread.

"What?" The little girl cried in dismay. "Is that all you can do?"

"What is that stick?" Asked the little boy, his beady eyes fixated on his wand. Tom snorted, wondering if he should apparate to the shore and leave these people to their fate.

Although… He thought shrewdly. Perhaps it is a good idea to assess my skills in the face of danger especially when the stakes are low. He hummed.

He planted his feet firmly, and aimed for the Carp's eyes and the area under his gills.
"Confundo! Bombarda Maxima! Reducto!"
He fired off spells, powering them with more magic than was usual.
Why the fuck was this fish so fast! He was forced to roll out of the way, when the carp shot a hot steam of water at him. It was intelligent too! The more he fought the bloody beast, the more it began predicting his moves and attempting to outmaneuver him, it was almost like he was dueling an opponent, except this enemy was a one trick pony with superior speed and an impenetrable shield. How impenetrable though? I cannot keep dodging forever, I need to finish this quickly.

What followed was a series of dodging executed in the most clumsy manner spurred only by his will to survive. He panted heavily, not accustomed to such bodily maneuvering as the fish spat water at him burning holes into the deck because of sheer pressure with which they were aimed at its target.
He did not have the time to dodge the next one. "Protego!" he yelled, conjuring a shield to take the brunt of the water pistoning at him. Sweat rolled down his shoulder.
He got up shakily from where he had thrown himself into the wooden barrels on the deck, clutching his right side where his ribs were bruised. He stared at the fish with determination, gathered all the magic he possibly could and in a fit of what could only be called sheer and absolute recklessness, he waited for the fish to attack him instead of attempting to aim at it first. So as a result, the fish came flying face first onto Tom.

"DIFFINDO!" He roared, slashing his wand diagonally. The sound of flesh tearing ripped through the air, deafening. He heard the men shouting when his world rained red.

There was a beat of hushed silence, and then the ear splitting shriek of a man wailing in horror.

"Oh shut up, bloody civilians," The boy barked, agitatedly.

"Shinobi-san! Shinobi-san!" He yelled going closer to the area on the deck where the Mighty Kiri Carp laid in tatters, its innards shredded and grotesque featuring half digested morsels. The smell of blood, feces and dead meat filled the air.
Tom slowly emerged from behind the best, drenched in blood and other fleshy bits he really didn't want to name. He sighed, wiping his face. "Yes, boy?"

"I'm not 'Boy'" He sniffed and then gagged on the atrocious smell. "You need a bath."

"Yes.. yes.. " said, Tom tiredly, completely drained of his magic after that kill.

He didn't really have the opportunity to lie down and sleep though, as the crew approached him hesitantly like he was the devil itself. No rest for the wicked.

"Shinobi-san." The leader of the crew said imperiously, though his voice shook. "Since you have very generously aided us in slaying this Mighty carp, we shall allow you to leave with the children on our ferry to reach shore."

Tom looked at him disbelievingly. "Allow me-?" His eyes glinted at the posturing.

"Shinobi-san risked his life against a majestic beast to save yours, you ungrateful idiots!" yelled the little girl.

Tom rubbed his brow, predicted the onset of a harsh migraine, and immediately smeared more blood on himself.

"Fine... fine…" He waved his hand. "We'll take the boat," He was certainly not in any condition to apparate.
Tom tiredly made his way with the children into a small ferry that hung off to the side of the ship and waited for it to be lowered down. The children chattered merrily.
"And then PEW! The water came slamming and shinobi-san went flying out of the way!" the boy gesticulated, his hand bouncing to the right to depict Tom's trajectory. The girl was nodding just as enthusiastically. Tom wavered, it was odd to see a little girl as animated with the violence as she was. All of this was such a mystery. It was killing him not to get to the bottom of it immediately. As it was, he could barely keep his eyes open. The children were surprisingly helpful, they took an oar each and started rowing to shore.
Eventually, the adrenaline in his blood quelled enough to notice the disgusting smell wafting off of him, he realised in disgust. Tom made the executive decision of lifting himself off the side of the boat and propelling himself into the water, ignoring the shouts of alarm from its young passengers. While a cleaning charm would work it wouldn't clean him completely. He tried to wash off what grime he could, leaving a red trail in his wake. He stayed afloat by sheer will power and pulled himself back up just as they reached the shore.
He looked around consideringly at the environment he'd been given. A tall shelf of cliffs lined the shore for a short distance before a forest began, and the trees undoubtedly sloped uphill. If he were an enemy or even a look out, he would take advantage of higher ground over the cliffs, he looked up tracing the jagged top.

Tom surveyed the rocky expanse of the cliffs once more when There!
As they reached the shore, he motioned for the children to be quiet and used his wand to shrink the boat and shove it into his pocket. Then he moved stealthily towards the forest. The cliff broke off tapering into a neat alcove; into a cave of sorts. He ushered the children in, and in quick movements layered a silencing charm, a low level ward, cleaned and then dried himself.

"So," He said finally, looking at his unwanted charges. "I have two questions before I pass out. I have spent too much energy. One, do you mean me any harm?"

The children looked at him wide eyed and shook their heads. " No, we only wanted to escape-"
"Ok good." Tom butted in. "And two, what are your names?"

The Boy took a step forward, coming to attention. "I am Momochi Zabuza, and this is Terumi Mei. We are in your debt." He said bowing deeply.

"Fantastic" He slurred. The words were music to Tom's ears, if debts were even remotely similar in this place as they were in England, they would be taken seriously. Even so he put an extra layer of ward on himself draining him of the last of his magic as he lulled into a fitful sleep.


When he woke up next, it was in the middle of the night. There was a soft chatter of voices, the smell of cooked meat and a soft glow of orange light that told him the children had made a fire and were roasting something on it.

"Shinobi-san!" Mei called happily. "We hunted some game and cooked it so you could rest up and eat and gain some strength!"

Tom could only look on in amazement as the child worked on her prey like it was an every day ordeal, even Tom wasn't accustomed to the barbarity of surviving in the wilderness. The Magicals here must truly be amazing, to be able to learn survival skills at such a young age. Tom shook his head, and offered his thanks. He ate quietly, contemplating on how to go about questioning these children without giving away too much. If anything goes wrong I could just erase their memories.

He did not need to initiate any conversation though, as the young boy- Zabuza- faced him with his eyes glittering.

"Who are you Shinobi-san? Are you not from here? You sound funny! Foreign! You wear funny clothes too! Can you teach us to protect ourselves? Do you serve a Kage? What is that stick thing you have? Why aren't you as strong as other Jounin?"
The boy finally paused to breathe, having said all of that in one go. He was squirming with curiosity.

Tom felt a flash of irritation at his last statement. But despite the fact that this child was being loud and crowding his personal space, Tom couldn't help but be amused. Here was a child that wanted to learn, and if there was anything Tom Riddle valued, it was young lives striving to better themselves. The society was only as good as its weakest link, Tom mused.

Looking down at himself, Tom admitted Zabuza was accurate in his assessment that he stuck out like a sore thumb in these robes. He fished around his pocket and dug out the trunk and unshrunk it, ignoring the children's thrilled exclaims.

He began thinking about his predicament, and although he wanted to proceed carefully, it was becoming obvious he wouldn't gain any information without losing some first. And as far as divulging information went, it was better to confide in a child compared to an adult Shinobi in this unknown territory.

"Zabuza-kun" Boy, was he glad he lived in Japan for a bit, or he would never get the hang of these honorifics."I would like to propose a trade. I will answer your questions if you shall answer mine."

The children nodded in excitement as they were finally getting answers. Of course, I've easily slept five hours, if not more. I must have really drained my core in that fight. He mucked around the trunk a little and found what he was looking for; loose fitting garments that he bought for his stay in Japan. They were a light blueish-gray color, matching his eyes. He looked at the children.

"My name is Tom Riddle. I am not from here, though you might have to explain where 'here' is, as I have arrived here by accident."

"Riddle-san" Mei twisted- the foreign sounding word over her tongue. Tom sighed, if he had to stay here he might as well make his name easier to say.

"You may call me Voldemort" He said, remembering the anagram he made years ago.

"Voldemo-san" Mei nodded, finding it infinitely easier to say. "You are in Mizugakure no shima; Island hidden behind water. You aren't loyal to any of the Kages or Feudal Lords, I presume?"

The girl was sharp as a tack, what did they feed these kids?

"No, it is safe to say I am not, Mei-chan" Tom agreed. "Though I wouldn't like for that to spread."

Mei and Zabuza nodded seriously, even if they were surprised by his easy admittance.

"I'm going to put up a screen to change now. Why don't you tell me about this continent?" He conjured a screen and slipped out of his robes quickly to change into the new clothes.

And so Terumi Mei spoke.
"The Continent is made up of several countries" She began in a lecture that looked extremely put upon and Zabuza had to stifle a giggle. "They operate as separate political entities and are monarchies, ruled by a Daimyo who stands as a ruler for an entire country. Each country has a Shinobi Village that has Heads who are generals that take care of military matters."

This sounded very similar to Feudal Japan, Tom mused. The countries probably maintained balance between themselves through nothing but power. He removed the screen and sat down comfortably in front of the fire.

"The majority of the power is held by the five elemental nations that includes Earth or Tsuchi, Lightning or Kumo, Wind or Kaze, Mizu or Water and Fire or Hi, along with other minor nations." Finished Mei.

"But you never told him about the Shinobi villages!" Zabuza exclaimed. "Terumi and I are Ninja!" He explained to Tom, quite passionately. "Shinobis are trained for survival from a very young age if we have the chakra coils and show the aptitude for it. Then we go to the Academy when we are old enough for training so we can protect our villages and those who are precious to us!" He said proudly.

These chakra coils seem to be the equivalent of a magical core. Fascinating how children are indoctrinated into serving their villages, I really must explore these nations before I head home.

"What exactly are the Shinobi Villages?" He asked Mei, knowing she was eager to answer.

"The Hidden Villages are where the Ninja live and train," she smiled. "The Kages or Heads stand equally with the landlords that rule the country they are a part of. A Hidden Village maintains its economy by training its citizens to be ninja from a young age and using them as manpower in various missions others would pay for, from weeding a garden for a single payment to receiving a constant budget from the country it resides in for being soldiers in case the country is involved in a war."

Mei recited, as if from a book. Tom looked amused. A symbiotic relationship then. Material and Human resources in exchange for military protection.

"So if I wanted to learn more about these villages, I would have to explore! Ne, Zabuza-kun?"

"No no no" Zabuza said, panicking. "We are at War Voldemo-San! You cannot simply cross borders without permission or at least being sneaky about it!"

"War?" He raised an eyebrow. He vaguely remembered the men on the ship saying something to that effect when he first woke up.

"Hai!" Zabuza nodded. "The First Shinobi War had culminated in a peace treaty twenty years ago, but it did not hold. The nations succumbed to a second great war a few years ago."

Something that was reminiscent of his world, thought Tom in surprise. He hummed and stood up, stretching a bit, still a bit stiff from his nap. He waved his hand to clear the remnants of their food, smirking when the children gasped.

He decided he felt benevolent enough to divulge some information after all.

"Hmm. I do not have loyalties as of yet, so you needn't worry children. What I have seems to be the equivalent of your Chakra coils, we call it a magical core."

"Magic," Breathed Terumi Mei, both of them looked up at him in awe, their eyes wide. "We have never seen anything like it before!"

"Indeed." Tom nodded, unsurprised. There seemed to be a different system in place for their energy conduct. He figured he wouldn't learn more until he met an older shinobi.

"This stick is called a wand. Where I come from, it is used as a conduit that is unique to every magical person. As such, I cannot tell if you can utilize the power I wield, until we experiment. Don't worry, we shall do so soon enough. Now tell me what you meant by me not being strong?"

The children looked a little embarrassed but Mei spoke up, "Voldemo-san, you aren't very fast. Even our genin could run circles around you?"

Feeling a little irate, he spoke up harshly, "What are you talking about? What is a genin?"

In the blink of an eye Zabuza appeared next to him and it wasn't often that it happened but Tom's mouth dropped open. No wonder the Mighty Kiri Carp tired me out, Merlin! Seriously, What. is. in. their. food?!

"The military is divided based on their skill, Voldemo-san. We start at the academy then there are the genin, chunin and jounin. The Kage are considered the strongest fighters of their village." Mei said awkwardly.

It occurred to Tom that the lifestyle here was much more ruthless, and whatever morals they had were very skewed as compared to his life back home. The children are smart, hard working and efficient, he realized, his eyes widened. By Morgana, I might actually feel right at home! Now now, he chastised himself. No need to get ahead of myself before I've collected enough data.

He inhaled deeply, trying not to feel too put out by the feeling of inadequacy.

"Looks like we would benefit from an exchange of skill-set," He said instead.

The children nodded happily.

"Now, then…" Tom's smile was shark-like. "On to more interesting questions. Where are you escaping from and why? And why have you tacked on to me to protection"

The children blanched in unison and glanced at each other.

"Well sir, Voldemo-san, that is to say-"

"Don't lie to me," Tom said coldly. "Lord Voldemort always knows."

That seemed to have the desired effect, and everything came rushing out.

It seemed the children were orphans, their parents were casualties of war. They escaped to avoid getting drafted under the Sandaime Mizukage.

"Drafted?" Tom said disbelievingly. "How old are you?"

"We are four, sir," Mei said shyly. "It isn't so much about our age, as it is about our abilities."

It turned out certain clans had something called Kekke Genkai. Tom listened in amazement as Mei explained to him.

"I beg your pardon?!" Tom almost fell back to polished English. "You can do what?!"

"I can spit lava," said Mei embarrassed. "It's called the Lava Release. I also have the boil release since I descend from two important clans."

"Show him, Mei-chan!" cried Zabuza. Mei looked up to Tom, nervously. Oh this would not do, talent should only be nurtured. Tom managed to turn his frown into what he hoped was an encouraging smile.
She beamed at him and turned to the fire giving it her utmost concentration. She made a seal with her hands, took a deep breath and spat into the logs. A small spittle of lava flew to the fire and she looked back at him awkwardly. " I'm not trained yet..." she trailed off.
"That was very good," said Tom seriously and she grinned. "What about you?" He said, turning towards Zabuza.

"I don't have a Kekke Genkai, Voldemo-San" he said, scratching the back of his head. "I am good at Tai-jutsu though, and I've only begun learning Ninjutsu." He stopped wondering if he should say anymore. "I came because Mei-chan needed someone to be there." He blushed a deep red, as though he had confessed a sin. Mei conversely, looked mighty pleased. Tom only observed and shelved their interaction in the back of his brain.

"Alright then, the sun is coming up. Might as well see what we can do." The children cheered, more than ready to head outside and learn. Tom grinned, quite liking the idea of teaching. He eyed the bandages on their arms and legs that kept their clothing from getting in the way, so he conjured some leaves into bandages so he could tie them as well. They headed out into the woods.

"We usually start by meditating, Voldemo-san! Then we stretch and run laps." Said Zabuza.

Tom agreed readily. Anything was better than to be stuck at the level of his current level of boredom and mediocrity. Meditation came easily; he was used to these exercises of centering himself to design his mindscape, since he had begun to learn occlumency and animagus transformations. When they stopped after an hour, Tom followed their instructions for stretching. It wasn't until they began running on a well trodden path in a clearing, that Tom began to comprehend just how out of shape he was. He panted deeply, already drenched in sweat while the children just ran on and on. He somehow managed to make seven of the ten circuits and collapsed in an inelegant heap on the forest floor. He lay still on his back wondering what he did to deserve this. Surely, there was an easier way?

Zabuza came laughing at him. "Voldemo-san, you gave up so easily!"

All Tom could do was grunt.

Eventually Mei joined them as well, and Tom decided now was a good time as any to see if they could access their core. To their utter dismay it wasn't as easy for them. It seemed when calling upon it, they could only access some portion of it. Zabuza managed to emit water from his hand and Mei could manipulate both fire and water. Tom had a sneaking suspicion that it wasn't completely because of the lack of a conduit that the children couldn't access their core, just as it wasn't as easy for him to increase his endurance. Something in him told him to keep trying despite the failure.

Feeling a little disheartened, they decided to pick some fruits for a quick breakfast and head back to their cave, when Tom stiffened.

"What is it Voldemo-san?" asked Mei in a hushed whisper.

"Stand behind me, someone is coming" Tom said curtly, feeling the vibrations of an incoming creature -human- from the direction of the cliffs. The children complied without question, but with worried little expressions on their faces.

There was a spike of an aura that spoke of death. The Killing Intent, Tom remembered.

"Ah… I wondered where you three went. I lost track of you a half hour ago." An unfamiliar voice called.

"Who are you?" Tom demanded, noting the band on his forehead depicting the Mist.

"I am a Shinobi of The Hidden Village of the Mist" The man looked for all the world like a cat playing with a ball of yarn. "We have a claim on Wave, shinobi-san…. The real question is," The killing intent spiked, and the man felt a lot more threatening than he did mere moments ago, as the feeling of suffocation entered his lungs.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?"