Disclaimer: Star Wars belongs to George Walton Lucas Jr. and friends. Not me. Nuh-uh.

(If anyone wants to know the full names of 42 celebrities, go to They've Got Mail Chapter 25 and scroll down. (Two I forgot to add in to that list: John Christopher Depp II and Zooey Claire Deschanel.)They've Got Mail is basically this massive crossover between Back to the Future, The Matrix, Star Wars, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, The Frighteners, Star Trek: Original Series, The Lord of the Rings and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. It starts out with not much of a plot, until chapter 14 when a bunch of movie characters get zapped into the real world. Multiple same-actor crossover; I initially wanted to add in Indiana Jones and get him and Han Solo together, but the story didn't allow that. If you like that sort of thing, go read. ;P

Back to the poem...


THE PHANTOM POET

A long time ago, on the planet of Tatooine
There lived a young slave boy, and his name was Anakeen.
The Star Wars fans cringed at the horrible misspelling
And vowed to kill the poet for not knowing such a thing
For obviously the poet had not done any researching.
Either that, or decided that 'Anakeen' rhymed with 'Tatooine'
Better than 'Anakin', and was just
Too lazy to rewrite the first line
And then find a better,
Canonically correct,
Word
To rhyme with it.
Such are the falling standards of Star Wars fan poetry.
(The poet would also like to take this time to
Point out the wonderful alliteration at
Line ten of this poem.)
Then the poet
Rereads the poem
And conclusively concludes that the whole thing
Is actually kind of crap,
And should be scrapped,
And those previous two lines don't really
Rhyme anyway,
And this is all a huge waste of time
When, by right, the poet should be
Studying
Or at least doing something
More useful
Than writing a bad Star Wars poem
Which has increasingly
Less and less to do with Star Wars
In much the same way that the
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy
Got increasingly less and less of a trilogy
With each new book.
So the poet
Stops writing.
There.


Okay, I guess that one wasn't that good; I'll try to make up for it in the next one. Review!
Thanks for reviewing - The Hobbit Lass (yep, there'll be more), Anakin-Padme (everyone seems to like that stanza most), Dovasary (nope, nothing wrong with crying in a theatre. ;P Chicken grease?), Crossbow (sporflefunny? How? ;P), Black Pheonix (ooh. Mysterious screaming fangirls...), scrb3331 (yeah, the movie has a plot. Which is just wrong. But it was nice anyway), Melenna (So did you cook for your aunt?), Countess Jackman (updated!), wraithgirl (ok, continuing!) and ChibiAngel386 (yeah, the first one was still the best.)

HyperCaz: What did you do to the Bunsen burner? Once my classmate stuffed bits of paper down one when our lesson was over. Dunno what happened to the next person who used it.
Asha Ice: :high fives: Hey, you're from RGS? Uh, do you know a Sec 4 clarinetist in the school band named Jasmine? She was my friend from RGPS. Go stalk her. ;P
Relyan: You've seen The Last Starfighter too? Wow. You're the first person I know who's watched it too. It inspired one of my original novels that got stopped halfway due to writer's block.
tuathafaerie: Yeah, I've read the Hitchhiker's trilogy - all five parts of it, plus the short story. ;p Yoda looked better in Ep 3 compared to the original trilogy.