CHAPTER SIX
SLOW AND STEADY GETS YOU NOWHERE

Someone appeared in the cafeteria, telling the Major that the elusive Sheriff JT was waiting for him in the Coach's office.

Not knowing what else to do, Dorian followed along. "Major…" he said mildly.

Klaus stopped and spun around. "What?" To his astonishment, the Earl actually flinched. He couldn't recall a time he had ever done this.

"I…um, where…?" Dorian stammered out.

The Major gave him a steady look and sighed heavily. "Come on." He turned, leading the way back toward the Coach's office where the Sheriff was waiting with excellent news. The telephone lines had been repaired. He went on to say that the chainsaw crews were out and should already be attacking the tree that had crushed his rental car.

"Does this phone call out?" the Major asked, indicating the phone on the desk.

"I expect so," the Sheriff replied. "I believe it's a direct line."

"Good." The Major picked up his wrecked suit coat and pulled out a small book. "Now, if there's nothing else, I need to call my superiors." He dropped into the chair and looked up. "This might take some time."

The Sheriff exchanged a puzzled glance with Dorian before they both left the room, closing the door behind them.

"So, you're the Major's missing business associate," the Sheriff said conversationally.

"That's what he tells me," Dorian replied mildly. "I'm afraid I don't remember."

"Then we'll start from scratch." The Sheriff held out a hand. "I'm sure you can tell by the uniform I'm the Sheriff in these parts. Folks call me JT."

Dorian shook the man's hand. "JT. I'm afraid I can only tell you what the Major's told me."

The Sheriff laughed and then looked the Earl up and down, taking in his mop of long blond curls. "You don't look the type who'd be doin' intelligence work."

"Intelligence work?"

The Sheriff's eyebrows went up. "Didn't the Major tell you that's what he does?"

Dorian shook his head. "The Major doesn't volunteer much information. He did say the reason we're here is classified."

The conversation was interrupted as a stream of curses in German issued forth from the Coach's office. This was followed by the Major shouting at someone on the phone.

"That doesn't sound good at all," the Sheriff remarked.

"He must've reached his superiors," Dorian replied aridly. He cocked his head to one side and listened as the Major argued with someone, the conversation continuing in German.

"Damn, he talks fast," the Sheriff said, shaking his head. "Wish I knew what he was saying."

"He's telling someone what happened to us."

"You understand all that?"

Dorian gave the man a startled look as he realized that he did. "Apparently." He continued to listen, feeling his heart in his mouth as the Major started ranting about being stuck in the middle of nowhere with "that Goddamn bloody Eroica" who had been stupid enough to lose his memory.

"God fucking dammit!"

"You don't have to translate that one." The Sheriff cleared his throat. "I think I'll leave now. I'll be back after they've got the Major's car out from under the tree."

Dorian watched the man leave. With nothing else to do, he sauntered along the hallway while the Major continued to rant in the next room. He looked into the trophy cases and up at the seemingly endless team photographs on the walls. He found himself draw to the photos, and could not help admiring all the strapping young men in their short shorts and body suits. The photos of the wrestling team were particularly evocative.

Dorian jumped when the officer threw open the office door, a look of thunder on his face. "No joy, Major?" he said mildly.

"Shut the fuck up, you Goddamn bloody—" The Major broke off when a stricken look came to the Earl's face. He waved a hand in the air. "Tomorrow, maybe, they tell me," he said coldly. "Tomorrow!"

"What tomorrow, Major?"

"That's when they think they might have someone available to come get us. Tomorrow!" The Major gave another growl.

"It's as bad as Persia, isn't it?" Dorian replied.

"Worse! It's—" Klaus broke off and gave the Earl a stunned look. "What did you say about Persia?" Tomorrow. This one word had driven the officer mad when he was in Iran. Apparently, the Earl had been no less annoyed.

"I just meant…" Dorian's voice trailed off as he realized he had no idea where the remark had come from. He put a hand to his head and gave the Major a confused look. "I don't know what I meant."

"You're remembering?"

"I don't know."

The Major sighed heavily. "Don't think about it."

"That's all I can do." Dorian gave a small laugh of irony. "I think I need some fresh air."

The Major headed down the hall. "Good. I need a cigarette."


Several hours later, Klaus was back outside smoking a cigarette. Dorian had been dragged away by his ardent admirers to tell another story. The Major was beginning to suspect that it was just the parents' way of having someone else look after their brats, not that he was complaining. It kept Eroica out from under his feet as well.

"I hope someone does come tomorrow," the Earl remarked as he came out to join the officer. "I don't think I can do that much longer."

"I'm amazed you can do it at all," the Major remarked, offering the other man a cigarette.

Dorian looked at the proffered cigarette a moment before accepting it. It seemed such an automatic gesture on the officer's part that he decided that he must smoke, even though he had no memory of knowing how. "Why do you say that, Major? Am I not a good story teller?"

Before the Major could reply, some rough looking individuals walked over to them, along with some of the women who had been fawning over Dorian earlier.

"There he is," one of the women said, holding out a hand. "Earl, this here's Joe Bob. He and the boys wanted to meet you."

"They did?" Dorian got a very confused look on his face as he looked at the group. He glanced over at the Major, seeing he was equally surprised. "Why?"

"We don't get honest-to-God royalty around here very often, do we, boys?" Joe Bob said to the others. "Susie says you're a Prince, or somethin'."

"Earl, actually," Dorian corrected hesitantly.

"No, shit? And she tells me you don't remember too well."

"Yes, well…that bit's true."

Joe Bob burst out laughing. "He talks real good, don't he?"

The Major rolled his eyes. Great. From a hayseed Sheriff to a group of bloody rednecks. I'm gonna kill the fucking Chief for sending me here.

"Joe Bob and the boys've been cuttin' down trees all day," Susie explained.

"Would you be one of the chainsaw crews the Sheriff mentioned?" the Major injected.

"Yea, that's us," Joe Bob replied. "We came to pick up the girls." He gave Susie a squeeze. "They've been volunteerin' all day."

Susie giggled. "We're havin' a cookout in the back, by the athletic field."

"Indeed." Dorian had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.

Joe Bob gave Dorian a toothy grin. "How 'bout you join me and the boys for some authentic down home cookin', Earl? Not that slop they're servin' in there."

"Um, no, I don't…" Dorian replied hesitantly. He gave the Major a helpless look. For the first time that he could remember, the officer saw the Earl completely out of his depth. "Major…?"

"You wanna come too, Major?" Susie asked sweetly.

"No," Klaus replied tersely, adding, "Thank you,"

"Maybe it ain't cookin' from his home, Susie," Joe Bob said happily. "You ain't from England like the Earl, are you, Major?"

"The Major is from Germany," Dorian quickly volunteered. Then he blinked, exchanging a surprised look with the Major. Perhaps he was remembering.

"No shit?"

Klaus rolled his eyes but did not reply. Then Dorian gave him a helpless look.

"You don't mind, do you, Major?"

The Major shrugged. "How much trouble can you get into eating home cookin' in the back?" he said acidly.

"You're right."

Joe Bob laughed as he pressed a bottle of beer into Dorian's hand and the clasped an arm around his shoulder, steering him towards the athletic field at the back of the building. The Major saw the Earl take a tentative sip from the bottle and then laugh, going on to take a swig.

"He has lost his mind," Klaus muttered darkly, shaking his head.