Nine Months Later
Unfortunately, after all this time, Bahamut still found himself swimming in a tank with a breath mask attached to his face. However, he was now breathing regular air…and looking about without the aid of a visor.
The esper had undergone yet another change. Rather than rebuild the rest of his limbs, Dr. Maester had started with remodeling Bahamut's head, which would be the hardest part. It would be the first part they would actually replace instead of build new. Not only was engineering a brain a monumental task, but there was some question of the sort of effect it might have on Bahamut. The esper was a bit nervous about it as well. Would he be the same person when it was done? Or would he be some sort of machination? It presented an interesting problem, to say the least. The structure was very complicated, and there was a fear that any attempt to actually transfer the consciousness would be a failure, in effect leaving Bahamut a vegetable.
A solution was finally presented. Nanites were injected into Bahamut's brain, bearing the new cell cultures, to facilitate a change over. In effect, they would swap out neurons one at a time with the new ones. The brain, being a very plastic organ, would easily be able to adapt for and correct the replacement of one neuron within instants. Once that neuron was assimilated into the brain, it would move on to the next. It was still iffy…and Bahamut was very uneasy about it. Yet the new body couldn't tolerate his old brain. He had to give it a try.
The entire process took an injection of 300,000 nanites and two months to complete. Every day, Bahamut found himself going over his life history, and scaring himself the moment something slipped his mind. He kept on asking Shinza during this time period if he was acting normal. The rest of the scientists continued to try and adapt more components as he waited. He did feel different with time. He felt…almost as if his memories and cognition had been greased. Things came to him much faster, and he was able to clearly process huge amounts of information within seconds. Yet his personality stayed the same. At the end of the two months, he was happy to learn that his brain had been totally replaced by a new one that operated like a supercomputer in terms of its ability to process data and produce results. Bahamut's reaction time had shrunk exponentially, and his new brain gave him the ability to not only store infinitely more data, but to process that even quicker.
With the hardest part done, the scientists began to move out. Starting at the back of the head, they began to surgically remove parts of his head and skull, one piece at a time, and put cables and clamps over them bit by bit. Luckily, there was a temporary layer erected to protect his brain. Piece by piece, his head was rebuilt. His one long horn was replaced by two long thin ones that were segmented, and, to Bahamut's surprise, actually were under muscular control. His rear crest became long and sharp, with two almost blades coming from the side of his head, and a shorter one coming back from the top.
By that point, they were to the eyes. That part was the most uncomfortable. Bahamut's single limb had to be immobilized for an entire month, else he would scratch at his eye sockets and ruin the reconstruction efforts. He was forced to clench what was left of his jaw and struggle to endure the constant itching and tingling. But in the end…it was more than worth it. The day the metal guards came off of his eyes…and he saw the place around him with his own vision. It was amazing. It seemed like his own eyes…but coupled with his brain, he could see anything. He could even see the nuclei of the cells on the tip of Shinza's nose as he looked at her.
The rest of the head was finished up soon after. The mouth was unusual. This was also uncomfortable. He had special tubes surgically inserted into his nostrils as they worked on his mouth, and he felt nerve pain once or twice. There was shifting happening to him there as well. When he finally had it removed, he was rather shocked. Oh, his jaw was fine. It felt great to be able to move it and chew, and to feel all of his teeth, now nearly unbreakable, set back in his jaw. But the front of his face…he had some long, pointed beak now, like a spearhead on the end of his mouth. It looked ridiculous to the esper, but Dr. Maester assured him that it was great for the aerodynamics they were planning to give him, and would have more essential functions later. And so…Bahamut swallowed his pride, and rejoiced in the fact that he had a face and head again.
However, he still couldn't breathe or eat yet, and had to keep the mask on while in the tank. At this point, metal casts were put around the rest of Bahamut's former limbs. Next came a more tricky part. Dr. Maester strongly urged Bahamut to accept drugs again at this point, but the esper refused it, claiming he could handle whatever it was. He was nearly proven wrong. Due to the drugs, life support, and multitude of devices that they switched in to take over for his organs, he was never in any danger. But nevertheless, they proceeded to make large incisions across his chest, and open him up like a cadaver. He could actually see his own mass of entrails momentarily before they brought in the proper sterilizing and containment equipment. Next, they removed his old, burned out lungs, temporarily attaching him to a breathing machine. It was weird. He actually saw a great sac within his own sac inflate and deflate. It was stained with Bahamut's blood, which ran in and out via tubes. Two more months went by as the rather complicated organs of his lungs were slowly regenerated and rebuilt. But in the end, these too were finished. On one day, a special cold/warm water flush was put into the medium to stimulate Bahamut's breathing reflexes, and his new lungs flared to life. He nearly swooned on the pure oxygen, but they quickly adjusted levels of it. To his surprise, he soon found that he could now breath with an air oxygen content of only 0.001 percent, as efficient as he was.
That left Bahamut to where he was at present. He was glad that he was able to breath more normal air now, although they held on giving him unfiltered for the moment, not wanting to stress his new body as it changed over. His neck was now enclosed in a metal cast as well. His vocal cords had been rebuilt by this point, and finally he was able to speak again. However, the vertebrae in his neck were still being worked on. His limbs were still in metal casts, and his organs were being replaced while his cut open chest continued to lay exposed within the sterile devices that had been implanted inside him. But other than that…things were going well. Damaged as his body was, Bahamut actually felt as if his head was "himself". And that was better than nothing.
Shinza still visited him every day. That was a relief. It was about the only face he could somewhat bond to throughout the time he spent in the tank. He continued to tell her his story as time went on. And every day she took more notes on it. He was drawing to an end now. There wasn't much more left. What he was saying should round out the fifth and final book in his series. It was mostly devoted to his time as Neo Bahamut, after coming back to life. And at present…he found himself feeling a bit stiff and saddened. He was beginning to talk of the immense joy he once had in his life…that was now crushed and gone. The happy time he had once been content and at peace…snatched away from him. Most of all, he talked about Terra…
It was inevitable that Shinza would ask him about this. She was sitting before his tank one day, looking up into his face as he kept his head bowed, looking over the tubes and cables that surrounded his body. She too looked uneasy. This was obviously a sensitive subject for him, and she wasn't sure she should pry into it.
"So…I take it that whatever event left you like this…was what kept you from having that life in Mobliz."
Bahamut paused at that, but then gave a slow nod. "Yes." He answered. "In another month, we'll get into more detail about it…"
Shinza winced uneasily, and curled down a moment. After a few seconds, she looked back up to him. "Is…there any way…? I mean, could she still be alive? Being half esper?"
Bahamut sighed and shook his head. "No. I knew she was human in respect to her longevity. What precious time I would have had with her is long since expired. The grandchildren of the children I befriended have passed on as well. Mobliz by now is its own continent, probably having come to rest off of the shore of the opposite land mass."
The Ettecan still looked nervous. For a long time, she wanted Bahamut to be happy. She wanted him to stay alive so he could tell her more. And she thought he was too amazing of a creature to just lay down and die, thinking that it would be a tragedy. However…that had passed. The great esper was her friend now. She was genuinely concerned for him and his well being. And it made her sad to always see him in such a lowly, bleak state. She wished she could do something to help him. After a few moments, she looked up to him again.
"What about the Crystal Stone?"
Again, the esper sighed and shook his head. "No. The only reason the Crystal Stone worked on me was because my essence was distilled into magicite. Under normal conditions, the body would have to be intact and undamaged. Sadly, by now, Terra is probably nothing more than a skeleton."
The woman recoiled a bit at that, lowering her head. She exhaled a little herself, and shared Bahamut's grief with him for a few moments. In the end, however, she turned and raised her head again. "I know this is jumping ahead again, but why did you leave her?"
Bahamut frowned. "At the time, I thought I was as good as dead. And after seeing how humanity had used the powers of my kind for generations, I did not want the same to happen to me, but especially for another chain of destruction to occur. I think, deep down inside, that this is what the rest of the members of my race truly wanted. Once they had all passed on, they would rather leave nothing on this world than see their remains violated by wicked, greedy men. I knew that if I stayed with Terra, one day I would be a threat to the future. Furthermore…our children would be hunted just as my family was. I realized, at the end of all things, that if I truly wanted to save those who were left in the world who were good…that I couldn't allow the esper race to dwell there anymore."
Shinza looked up at this uneasily. "Is that why you want to go back just to die? You don't want to run around your world any longer?"
Bahamut shook his head. "I've seen everything on my world. Now, I have nothing left. The world stopped being a place for espers at the end of the War of the Magi. There is nothing left of my kind or my people. And I've gone through enough deaths and rebirths to tire of it. Now…I just feel old. I just want to go to my rest like the others of my kind."
Shinza turned her head inward. "…You do have people here who admire you."
The esper shook his head again with another down look. "No matter what happens to me…no matter how many people admire me…no matter how much fame I gain…in the end I will always be just a stranger in a strange land. This isn't my home. It is not where I belong. And despite the efforts of so many to get me to feel well…I'm afraid I just will never be comfortable here. I am grateful for everyone's well wishes…but I can't stay here forever."
The professor sighed and bowed her head again. Still, she found herself powerless to cheer Bahamut. The esper appreciated the gesture, but it was to no avail. He had thought about this for much too long. This wasn't home to him. It would never feel that way. And he was sick to return to where he was. True…he would miss Shinza at this point. Out of all the Ettecans in the world, she seemed to genuinely care about him the most. She was a friend. But it couldn't be. In the end, he just wanted to lie down and rest.
At last, Shinza turned her head back up to him. She let out a small sigh. "Well…I'll do my best to keep you company until they're finished with you, at least. After that…I suppose I'll be going on my next voyage."
On hearing this, Bahamut's depression broke, and he raised an eyebrow to Shinza. "Next voyage? You're set up for life after your research with me. You want to actually go on a ship for another eight years?"
"Well, this one I set up for twelve, actually." Shinza responded, a bit uneasily and twisting slightly as she did so. The length of time seemed to make her rather uncomfortable, and he eyes turned to the ground. "I'll…be going to more distant nebula and trying to look for new life forms again. You know, more OPAs."
Bahamut frowned at this. "How can they make you do that? You'll be 56 years old in my time by the time you get back. You'll have spent much of the prime of your life in space. After this achievement, they still want to send you on another?"
Shinza seemed to grow more uncomfortable at that. She licked her lips nervously again, and dug her toe into the ground.
"Actually…I was the one who proposed the long distance study."
This made the esper look back a bit in puzzlement. "You?" He asked in incredulous belief. "You actually suggested that you go on a twelve year study?"
Shinza exhaled a little, and grew more nervous. She wrung her arms together uneasily and gave a shrug. "Well…yeah. I mean…it is a long time…" She grew quiet at this, as if she seemed to realize the length. When she did, it made her more anxious. "And…a long way from home…" She continued, sounding even more uncertain than that. "But…I do like biological OPAs…and this is what I did my thesis on…I'm sure it'll be great."
"Great?" Bahamut echoed back, disbelieving. "Shinza…it's a prison sentence. You'll throw away the last bit of your life you have to do things. You'll leave your homeworld behind to spend twelve years in a small vessel hurtling through empty, lifeless blackness. This planet is different from Gaia, but I know you like it. You can't really want to go through with this."
Shinza was beginning to sweat. She twisted uneasily against the ground. "Oh…no, no…" She responded, trying to make her voice sound upbeat and cheerful. However, she failed in this regard, and still wouldn't look Bahamut in the eyes. "I mean…I like research… It's…full of its own rewards… It is a great opportunity, after all…"
The esper frowned. "Shinza, listen to yourself. Look at yourself. It's as plain as the nose on your face that you don't want to go on this. Is someone making you? Are you having financial trouble? Someone or something has to be making you do this. You wouldn't be so nervous right now if it wasn't. What's the problem? What is making you go on this voyage?"
"Bahamut…really…" Shinza answered. Her arms began to raise and her voice filled with more power. Her voice started to become more earnest and strong, and grow in volume. But through it all…she looked scared and confused. "Really. I…I need to go on this. I have to go on this. I…I…I do want to do this. I just… I… I just want… I need to get away from the University, that's all. I… I've got to go on this!"
Shinza nearly shouted this last part. As she did…Bahamut was just able to catch a tear rolling down her cheek from her eyes before she rose from where she was seated, turned, and rushed out of the room as fast as she could. Her hands went to her eyes as she did so, trying to conceal them from anyone looking at them. She was fearful now…trying to get away from the esper…not wanting him to keep prying any more. Never had she walked out of a session before. Until now, they had always gotten back together on their spats. But now she went away…not out of anger but out of some gripping fear and tension that had a firm grasp on her.
Bahamut stared as she stormed out, opening the sliding door and darting through it. And as she did…he began to think yet again.
Six Months Later
The operations continued, and Bahamut's body continued to be improved. His neck and other arm were released, enabling him to be motile in the upper half of his body. His legs were unleashed soon after, although all he could do for the moment was float. To keep them from atrifuting and crippling him when released, he had electrodes innervate them and provide some electronic stimulation each day. Next came his chest cavity.
The heart was the next major organ to replace. As before, he had a blood pumping machine handle it for him while his heart was rebuilt. It worked just as well, and he didn't even notice. He only had the same strange feeling of seeing something outside his body do the work. After that came the other organs, the kidneys, the pancreas, the liver, and all of the pieces of the digestive system, one at a time. At the same time, his bones and vertebrae were gradually switched out, and the neurons switched around within the cords and main interventions. Gradually, his sternum was closed up again and sealed, as the mass of machinery went down to his stomach, like some bizarre umbilical cord.
At that point, the last few touches were made. His wing fragments were enclosed by rather long metal casts, as was the stump where his tail had once been. Once these came off, he would be totally rebuilt, and would emerge at last for good from the life support tank. He was left to anticipate the moment for when he would finally be free again.
The story continued during this. Shinza, never one to be upset for very long, returned the next day to take more information. However, she was a bit uneasy that day, as if anticipating Bahamut to press her decision again. He didn't at the moment, but it continued to rest in the back of his mind as he answered her once more. He began to plot again even as he heard her answer his questions…and turned his keen, analytical eyes upon her while she spoke, probing her and looking for any betrayal of facts.
This continued until one day, in which Bahamut was beginning to talk about his approach into Wyvern's new lair with his fiancée and newfound friends. It was at this time that Bahamut got a new idea. And so, he waited patiently for a few moments before springing it on her.
"So the six of you began to march into Zozo," Shinza started. "What happened when you got inside?"
"Shinza, do you ever see your mom and dad anymore?"
The Ettecan froze. Again, he saw her turn white. She swallowed, and Bahamut detected a tremble on her. Again, she bowed her head and wrung her hands. "I…thought we were finished talking about me…"
"I'd assume they'd want to talk to you, especially after what you discovered." Bahamut went on, seeming to ignore this. "On this world, I'm sure they have ways of contacting you quickly…"
Shinza swallowed again. "I'd…like to stay…on task…"
"I mean, they have to have friends at the bare minimum who want to know all about you, or get in touch with me via you." Bahamut still went on, sounding perfectly normal and sociable. "And as for you…you haven't seen them in years. Ever since our voyage began. You stayed with me that whole time. Shouldn't you go out and visit them? Spend a few days at your old home?"
The Ettecan, if possible, turned whiter. She began to distinctly tremble here. Her eyes looked to the ground and refused to turn up again.
"Are they dead?" Bahamut inquired.
"…My mother is…" Shinza finally stated. "My…father…"
Bahamut hated to do this, but if his suspicions were correct…this would be for Shinza's own good as well as his curiosity. And so, he pressed it onward. "Why don't you take a few days off then? Stop by home? I'm sure your father is very proud of you. I'm sure he misses you. I'm sure he'd like to hug and kiss his little girl again…"
It worked. At that, Shinza's face suddenly turned hard as stone. Her fear was replaced by an amount of anger, and her eyes blazed. Passion flushed her features as her body quivered.
"…He'll never…ever…touch me again…"
However, she stopped there. Bahamut's suspicions felt confirmed, but it still wasn't enough. He had to keep playing ignorance. He had to keep striking the buttons. And so, he pushed on even harder.
"Really? Well…wouldn't you like to feel your father's embrace again, after so many years away?"
That did it.
"I never want to touch that bastard again!"
The sudden outburst was so loud and passionate that the others in the room froze and turned to her. But she no longer cared. Her face was stretched tight and was livid now. She began to breathe hard, nearly gasping. But her face was flushed with rage…and her eyes were filling with tears. Hearing this, Bahamut realized he was finally here. Here, it needed to come out at long last. He stared at her silently for a moment. She quivered onward. Her face was enraged. Tears began to roll down her cheeks. But she hesitated again…and he pushed again.
"Why, Shinza? Did he do something to your mother?"
"My mother!" Shinza suddenly outburst. Her eyes were still glaring at the ground, but her face became impassioned and laughing. "My mother never gave a damn about me! She never wanted to have me in the first place! She always was just getting drunk and lying around the house all day…always hitting me whenever I got into anything…always telling me how she hated having to deal with me…how I was nothing but trouble…that she wished I had never been born… People wondered why I didn't cry at her funeral when she poisoned herself… Why should I! She never taught me what love was! If that was how a daughter and her mother were supposed to be…then I might has well have laughed when she finally died!"
Bahamut took this in, and it gave him pause for a moment. But it was only a second. "What about your father, Shinza? Why didn't your father ever stop her? Do something to intervene? Protect you?"
Shinza let out another half-hearted laugh…as more tears spilled from her eyes. "That's the craziest thing… The whole time, it turned out she was protecting me. You see, once she was gone, he didn't have anyone else to go to bed with every night…" She hesitated for a moment at this…as her face began to quiver and lost its anger.
"…Except me."
Bahamut drew back a little and swallowed. The truth was…he had feared this greatly. But hearing it didn't make it any easier. His own face sank a little as she continued.
"He always made me touch him…and kiss him in those places… Then he'd come on to me, and he wouldn't stop even when I screamed no… I tried to stay away from him. I tried to stay longer at school. I tried to run away. But he always found me… Then…he'd do it while he was angry. That was the worst… He always kept telling me he loved me the whole time… If that's what love is, I'd rather hate everyone in the world…"
"Why didn't you go for help, Shinza? Why didn't you go to your relatives or teachers?"
Shinza's tears were falling freely now…but she snorted angrily again. "I learned a great lesson then… I told my head teacher all about it. He had the police brought to my house. But then they talked to my father…and he twisted the whole thing around. He made it look like I was a delinquent and a liar…that I was making the whole thing up just to get attention. Then that's what ended up happening…the police scolded me, and then left me to him. He didn't even bother being careful. That night…he was at it again…the worst yet…
"That's the lesson I learned. You can't trust anyone. You can only trust yourself. You're the only one who really cares about you in the end. Everyone else…they'll stab you in the back as soon as look at you. And all these people who talk about love and romance…they're just trying to satisfy some carnal desire at the end of it. That's all it is…some act of biological desire for pleasure and mating.
"Well…I got better. In the end, the only one who could get me away from him was me. And since then…I've seen right through every dirty bastard who's come my way with one thing on their minds. And if there is a Hell like you believe, Bahamut…then I hope they burn in it along with my father and every other perverted man in this universe."
Shinza couldn't take anymore at this point. She turned and stormed away again. By now, she was aware that everyone was staring at her and looking at her. Bahamut didn't know, but she had never told this to anyone. But before an esper, a person who was not one of the race she now feared, she let it flow at long last. He didn't say anything to her, although a part of him wanted to. But this wasn't mere anger now. Now, Shinza's head was bowed and he heard her weep. She was cringed in on herself as she went to the door and left, never looking up or saying a word. Once she passed through the automatic doors and they closed again, the room was silent. The lab techies looked to each other nervously, and wondered what they should do or say in response to this. This was so sudden and unexpected…
Bahamut himself stared after her and paused. Now, it was all making sense to him. Hopefully, it was making sense to Shinza as well. He feared that it wasn't. These thoughts had been subconsciously ruling her life for years now. If she didn't become aware of them and did something about them, they'd ruin what time she had left. Now, his mind was fully focusing on this problem. His own cares and concerns were forgotten for the moment, as he thought only of her. To tell the truth…it made him feel a bit better. Now that he had a problem external to himself, it was a way of getting his mind off things. And he did fear greatly for his friend. He would live forever…but she had little time with which to make a good life for herself.
The esper reached a decision then…and set a new goal for himself. He wouldn't act on it now. He had a feeling that even Shinza wouldn't be able to return too quickly after this. Nevertheless, he had a plan and a purpose now, after so long. And it was more than waiting to be completed. It was a true mission to complete with the rest of his life…now that he had a friend once more.
On that note, Bahamut eased back into his pod again. There was nothing more to be done now than think, and he was rather good at that.
To be continued...
