Chapter 35

40 years before Encanto


"Hey." Julieta smiled as she opened Pepa's glowing door.

She'd just gotten back from work as healer and was pleased to see her sister was home. Often Julieta would come back to an empty house and it got lonely.

Pepa glanced up from her desk, her eyes red and her room wet. She scowled, feeling ashamed as she turned back to what she was doing.

Julieta came over to the desk, kneeling beside Pepa's chair. She slowly rubbed Pepa's back, watching as her sister scrawled into a book. She had it sitting on top of a towel to try and save the paper, but it was still a little crinkled and warped.

Julieta recognised it as their school work. She noticed scribbles all over one of the answers and wondered if she should offer help, but decided against it. Pepa got very competitive about their homework, and Julieta knew the offer would only insult her.

"I'm sorry." Pepa muttered, not looking up from her work. "About the box."

"Ay. Don't worry about that." Julieta gave her a reassuring smile, a hand playing with Pepa's braid. "You ok?"

Pepa shook her head, and as she did rain sprinkled over them. She groaned, slamming the book shut and leaning over it, her face in her arms.

Julieta gently hugged Pepa's shoulders, then went and fetched the umbrella by her bed, opening it over them. Pepa turned to her with a sad expression.

"You gonna tell me what happened?"

Julieta offered a hand and Pepa took it, their fingers interlocking.

"My friends don't want to play with me." Pepa said in a soft voice.

Julieta kissed Pepa's hand, listening quietly.

"I did what you said, just be myself..." Pepa's nose twitched a little. "But they didn't like it."

Julieta kissed her hand again.

"Well, I like you." Julieta smiled. "I'll always want to spend time with you."

Pepa took a breath, leaning into Julieta. She felt grateful to have her.

"What do you think is wrong with me?" Pepa whispered, afraid of the answer. "Is it the clouds..." Her expression softened as she turned to her sister. "Or do you think it's just me?"

Julieta sighed, stroking Pepa's fringe.

"What I think," She said carefully, "Is if someone likes you or doesn't like you, it doesn't change your worth, Pepi."

Julieta kissed her face and Pepa smiled, feeling comforted.

Growing up, Pepa had learned to rely on Julieta. Mama was on and off with her moods. Her heart was heavy with unresolved trauma and grief, and sometimes it all became too much. Sometimes Mama needed to become very busy with the village and her work, or hide in her room alone. Other times Mama would become angry and shout, and Pepa would take Bruno's hand and they'd hurry up to his tower.

Julieta would often stay and help Mama. She was there to listen to Mama's worries, to help when Mama had bad dreams or when she couldn't forget the terrible things that'd happened at the river. Pepa didn't fully know what Mama had gone through, but Julieta did. She'd heard all the stories.

Mama leaned on Julieta in a way that made Julieta grow up faster than she was meant to.

While Pepa and Bruno played, Julieta would be cooking and healing the town, or making dinner for the family. While Pepa and Bruno cowered under a cloud because they'd been bad, Julieta smoothed things over, defending Pepa and Bruno with words wise beyond her age as she calmed Mama down, then went to comfort her siblings.

For Bruno and Pepa, Julieta was everything. She was the one constant positive in their lives. No matter what happened, or what they did wrong, Julieta always loved them the same.

Pepa stroked Julieta's hair, turning in her chair so she could face her.

"Aren't you tired, hermana?" Pepa asked. "You were working so hard, helping everyone all day. You don't have to help me too."

"I not tired." Julieta shrugged. "Besides," She smiled, touching a finger to Pepa's nose. "I like helping. You know that."

Pepa smiled back, her eyes warm.

"You're so special." She continued. "And if they can't see that, it doesn't mean something's wrong with you." Julieta smiled. "It just means they don't know you, Pepi."

Julieta's voice became a little more playful as she leaned into Pepa, her nose rubbing against her sister's cheek.

"But I know you!" Julieta grinned. "You have a kind heart, beautiful smile, cool hair, awesome powers..." She kissed Pepa's face. "You're so special, Pepi. To me, to Bruno, to Mama..."

Pepa groaned. She wasn't so sure about Mama. Pepa had made a lot of mistakes lately, and the town was still upset at this season's spoiled crops.

Pepa's eyes widened as she realised that's probably why her friends were acting strange. A lot of villagers were avoiding Pepa because of what she did. She slowly exhaled, understanding what she needed to do.

"Thanks Juli." Pepa sighed.

Julieta nodded with a smile, then curiosity got the better of her.

"What was the game?"

"Hm?"

"You said they wouldn't play with you." Julieta reminded her gently. "What was the game?"

"Oh." Pepa sighed. "Dancing."

Julieta couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh, Pepi..." She shook her head in disbelief. "They really missed out." She grinned, climbing up onto Pepa's bed. "But lucky me, now I get you all to myself."

Julieta started to dance, jumping and spinning on the bed.

Pepa grinned, watching her.

"You're not gonna join me?" Julieta laughed.

Pepa laughed too, her confidence returning as she climbed up to join her sister.


The next day


Pepa returned to the bridge to see her friends feeding Pezito again.

She took a deep breath, summoning up the courage to apologise and make things right, but was surprised when they came over to her.

"Pepa!" One called out, and Pepa's face lit up into a smile.

"Come over here," Another encouraged. Pepa followed, shaking her hand back and forward in excitement.

"This is Eduardo." Her friends introduced them.

A group of boys chuckled to eachother, pushing one of them forward. He frowned at them, then approached Pepa with a nervous smile.

"Do you like him?" Another girl asked.

Pepa stared back at Eduardo, not sure what to say. Wind started to blow around them.

"That means yes." One of the girls laughed, gesturing to the wind. "It's how she talks."

Pepa frowned. That wasn't true.

"Do you want to be his girlfriend?" Another pressed.

Pepa hesitated, seeing all eyes on her. They waited for her answer, and Pepa didn't want to disappoint.

She watched her friends with trusting eyes, then turned back to Eduardo and nodded, assuming that's what they wanted to hear.

The girls all exclaimed in excitement. Pepa smiled.

"Well, hold his hand."

Pepa did as they said.

"Now kiss him."

Pepa swallowed, looking back at them. She'd never kissed anyone before. She felt afraid.

"Go on." Her friends encouraged. "Kiss him."

Pepa took a deep breath, turning back to Eduardo.

Maybe it would be nice? She liked when Mama kissed her. Maybe it would just be like that.

Pepa leaned in and closed her eyes, bracing herself.

Nothing happened. She heard the roar of laughter around her and opened her eyes.

"Ew." Eduardo pulled a face at Pepa, stepping back while the rest of the children laughed at her.

Pepa took a shaky breath, wrapping arms around her chest as she tried not to cry.

"She was actually gonna do it!" The boys laughed.

"What a freak."

"Gross."

Pepa winced at their words. They were laughing at their friend too, for going near her.

"You almost kissed the gringa, Eduardo."

"I'm not a gringa." Pepa spoke up, her chest puffed defensively as she fought back tears.

The boys looked up in wonder as rain began to pour over their heads.

"That's so cool." One commented, jabbing a finger at Pepa's chest to see what would happen.

Pepa's cloud thundered. She flinched, knowing she wasn't supposed to do that. Mamá would be mad if she found out.

"This is amazing!" They looked up at the swirling clouds. "Look how they change."

"Told you." One of the girls said.

The boys jabbed at her again, and Pepa let out a sob.

"She's just a baby." One laughed. "Baby gringa."

The cloud thundered and lit up, and they grinned, turning to eachother in excitement.

"Im not!" Pepa exclaimed, her eyes fierce.

"Then what's wrong with your hair?" They egged her on, wanting to see what would happen next.

Pepa's heart sunk. She took her braid in her hands, holding it protectively.

"And your face." Another laughed. "What's wrong with your face?"

Pepa's expression softened, because she didn't know. She'd always looked different.

A hand grabbed a fistful of Pepa's hair and pulled roughly, causing her cloud to flash.

"Stop!" She gasped, taking their hand in hers and pried their fingers off.

Pepa's chest heaved in panic as she backed up. The boys all crowded around her.

"Stop it." She warned them, glancing up at her raging cloud. She took a sharp breath, trying to hold back the storm.

They glanced at eachother in excitement, gesturing to the sparks of lightning.

Pepa looked up at the cloud, stroking her braid with her hands.

"Clear skies, clear skies, clear skies- ay!!"

Someone shoved her to the ground.

Pepa's body hit the bridge and her clouds lit up, thundering and flashing as she groaned in pain, holding her knee.

"Woah!"

The boys crowded around Pepa, laughing in excitement. They watched as lightning flashed above them and rain poured down. Pepa looked around with wide eyes, desperate for someone to help her.

Seeing Pepa turn to them with a terrified expression, the girls stopped laughing.

"Oh guys, cut it out." One of them spoke up.

Another girl came over and Pepa hugged tight. She hid her face against the girl and sobbed, grateful that her friend was stepping in.

"Oh Pepa, they're just joking." The girl explained. "They didn't mean it."

Pepa looked up at her with watery eyes.

"It was just a joke." The girl insisted, turning to the boys. "Right?"

"Yeah, of course."

"We were just joking."

Pepa sobbed, her fingers gripping tight to her friend's sleeve. She didn't understand. If it was a joke then why did it still hurt? Pepa whimpered between gasps, her heart pounding in terror.

"You're fine." The girl reassured her. "It's just a scrape, Pepa. Have an arepa and it'll be gone."

Pepa glanced down at her bleeding knee and shuddered. Her eyes darted back up to the boys. She held tight to her friend, feeling afraid.

"They were just joking around." The friend insisted. "Come on, you're wetting everybody."

Pepa wiped her eyes, doing her best to stop crying.

One of the group made eye contact with the girl Pepa was hugging, gesturing to the road behind them. The girl nodded in agreement, turning back to Pepa.

"I'm gonna help you, okay?" She smiled, taking Pepa's hand as they stood up. "Come on."

"I'm sorry about the crops." Pepa gasped, knowing that's why this was happening to her. She looked at the others. "I'll do better. I promise I'll do better."

They glanced at eachother, then back to Pepa, not knowing what to say back.

The girl led Pepa away from the group, walking her down the road to Casita.

Pepa leant into her friend as they walked, glancing over her shoulder to make sure the boys hadn't followed. She then turned back with a grateful expression and hugged her.

"Sorry you got sad." The girl said as they walked.

Pepa swallowed, her fingers shaking as she held tight to her friend's hand.

"You know," The girl continued. "I'll make a wish to Pezito tonight, so you'll feel better." She turned to Pepa with a proud smile. "It was my Papi who caught him and brought him to our village, after all. So Pezito especially blesses our family. It's our miracle."

"Thank you." Pepa said quietly.

They reached Casita and the friend left. Pepa watched her go, then turned back to Casita, feeling stuck. She didn't want to go inside. She didn't want to explain herself.

Her knee had stopped hurting, but the words still repeated over in her head.

What's wrong with your hair? What's wrong with your face?

Pepa took a shaky breath, fingers touching her face and tracing over her features as rain began to pour. She dropped to the ground, mud splashing over her.

She sobbed, looking down at her muddy hands and feeling helpless, then saw her reflection in the puddles on the ground. Upon seeing her face, Pepa screamed in anger and the sky lit up. She slapped the puddle, thunder crashing as she hit at her reflection, over and over. Mud splashed over her face and hair as she screamed and sobbed.

Seeing the wavering reflection change, Pepa hesitated. Her hair was dirty now and the mud changed it's colour.

Pepa gasped softly, leaning in for a closer look. Her expression hardened in determination. She scooped handfuls of mud into her hands and splashed it over her hair, smearing mud through her braid and down her arms, her breathing fast and heavy. She closed her eyes, sobbing and gasping as she rubbed mud all over her face.

When Pepa opened her eyes again they were glowing bright with anger. She stared down at her reflection, her expression fierce as wind and lightning swirled around her. She rubbed at her eyes, wanting them to stop glowing.

Dios. Why couldn't she just be normal?

Pepa screamed again, but her eyes glowed brighter as her anger intensified. The sky flashed as Pepa slammed her fists down into the puddle, lightning striking the ground around her.

"Pepa!"

Pepa flinched at Mama's voice, the glow in her eyes disappearing along with the storm. She looked up with a panicked expression, the wind blowing anxiously. Mama came out the front door with an umbrella, rushing over.

"What are you doing?" Alma called, her voice filled with concern. She crouched down beside her daughter, her hand to Pepa's cheek as she searched her dirty face. "What's going on out here?"

"I fell down, Mama." Pepa whispered, too afraid to tell her the truth.

Alma exhaled, believing Pepa. Her expression softened and she shook her head in exasperation.

Dios, was that it? Alma thought, examining the graze. All this chaos over a scraped knee? She really needed to help her daughter gain better control over herself, this wasn't good.

"Ay... Whatever will we do with you, mija?" Alma smiled gently, wiping mud from her daughter's face. "But you know," Alma took on a more serious tone. "You cannot get angry like that, Pepa. You will hurt someone." She wiped back her fringe. "Clear skies. Remember?"

Pepa nodded, sniffing as her nose began to run. Alma gently wiped it, then kissed her daughter's forehead.

"You can't just make a big storm every time you fall down, cariño." Alma told her. "What did I tell you? When we fall down..."

"We get back up." Pepa said quietly.

"That's right." Alma smiled. "We get back up. And we don't cry. Because life is always going to knock you down, mija. And you cannot let it win." Alma used hands to emphasise her words. "You need to push the bad feelings down, and keep going. Do you understand?"

Pepa nodded.

"Good girl." Alma hugged her and Pepa sunk into her embrace, resting her face against Mama's shawl and feeling safe. Her hands held onto the fabric as she breathed in Mama's familiar smell.

"Come on, you need to have a bath." Alma encouraged. "And Bruno has prepared that game, the special storytelling one... Ah, what was it called again?"

"Magic and Monsters?" Pepa smiled hopefully. She loved that game. Bruno had made it up just for the family and they'd been playing for months now. Just the thought of it made Pepa feel okay again.

"Mm." Alma muttered to herself, helping Pepa to her feet and wiping her clean. "I thought it was called Miracle."

"That's your character's name, Mama." Pepa laughed, taking Mama's hand. Alma always got confused by all the rules and lore that Bruno had created.

"Oh." Alma chuckled. "Well, let's clean you up so we can play after dinner." She wiped under Pepa's eyes once more. "Hm?"

Pepa nodded, squeezing Mama's hand in short little bursts as Alma led her inside.