"I hate plaaaaaaaaaaaaanes."
"Look," Calla said under her breath as Flight 54 took off, "if this woman keeps throwing up, I'm going to parachute out and hitchhike to Maine."
We were settled in for the long flight to Iltai. Hawkeye was by the window, looking claustrophobic.
"Do you feel like everyone's sucking the oxygen out of here?" asked Hawkeye. "I mean, there's only enough for so many people." He turned around. "Let's all take in small breaths...in...out. In...out."
"Hawk, there's plenty of air," I said.
Calla turned a little pale. "You sound like you aren't sure about that."
XXX
We did NOT run out of air, and reached Iltai in a few hours. Grace Belkin was waiting to drive us to the Cove.
"Hawkeye! Hawkeye! HAWK-EYEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Hawkeye gritted his teeth. "Coming, Grace."
Grace turned out to be a petite woman, with dark brown wiry hair and a red sweater. Her face dropped as she saw Calla and me. "Hawkie, who are your friends?"
"Hawkie?" I repeated.
"They're Russian spies," said Hawkeye. "This is Irina, and this is Maritzie. Say guuten haieger, girls."
"Guuten haieger," Calla and I said in unison.
Grace's eyes grew wide. "Wow," she breathed.
(Obviously this woman hadn't been out too much in the world.)
"Rada," Calla said to me. "Kilize icrima dijoupn."
Grace pulled Hawkeye closer to her. "Are they going to hurt us?"
Hawkeye put his hands on our heads. "Close operation."
"Hi," Calla said. "I'm Calla Waters."
She extended her hand, and Grace recoiled. "Don't come near me, you psychotic Russian!"
"Watch yourself," Hawkeye warned. "They have ways."
We followed Grace to her car,a green pickup with some large dents. She slid in the driver's side door.
"Oh," she said, noticing us. "I don't think they'll be room for you in here."
"Really?" Calla imitated her breathy tone.
"Yes." Grace's girly-girl voice dropped. "So if you'll get in the back."
As it turned out, Hawkeye, Calla, and I rode in the back of the pickup, with Grace sulking in the front. She made an attempt to roll down her window and shout something to Hawkeye, but I think a bug flew down her throat.
The drive took forty minutes, but I think I fell asleep for over half of it. The next thing I knew, Calla was shaking my shoulders and I moaned.
"Go awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, it's morning."
With the help of Hawkeye, my daughter and...male companion carried me off the truck.
"Is she all right?" Grace asked. Her voice was back to semi-normal.
"Just tired," said Calla as she grabbed her suitcase.
I was dropped to the ground.
"Do you know that you're evil?" I asked.
Calla burst into menacing laughter.
"You frighten me." I stood up and took my bag.
The Pierce house looked the same as it had fifteen years ago. Incredibly huge, on the water, with a big porch and a swing.
"Hawkie, I'm so sorry about your dad," Grace said. She grabbed Hawkeye's arm. "I think he really liked me. He was waiting for us to get married. I think that when you went to South Carolina to visit your girlfriend his heart just...gave out." She sighed. "But I don't blame you, of course."
Hawkeye eyed her suspiciously.
Inside the house, it was bustling with activity. A fourth of Crabapple Cove's population was crammed into the kitchen, living room, and dining room.
"Dr. Pierce!" crowed an elderly woman. "What would you like done with the tableclothes?"
"Just leave them," said Hawkeye.
"But Doctor, you're a single man and--oh my, who is THIS?" The woman's attention turned to me.
"Jaclyn Waters," I said. "This is my daughter, Calla."
The woman raised an eyebrow. "Are you related to Daniel?"
"I was," I said.
"Then why-"
Calla shoved a stack of pillowcases off the table. "Oh, my! I'm so sorry, let me help you get those."
As they collected the pillowcases, I motioned for Hawkeye to join me in the hallway.
"Look, we have to have an excuse why I'm here," I said. "They won't believe that I'm just a friend--even though I am."
"Look, if they don't have enough decency to keep their traps shut, I'll personally sic Grace on them," Hawkeye said. "She's staying here tonight."
"Here?" I put my hands on my hips. "Why?"
"Because she's Grace."
I sighed. "Can I go put my stuff upstairs?" I asked.
"Yeah. There are a bunch of empty bedrooms," answered Hawkeye.
Calla and I moved through the sea of old women and went up the steps. Upstairs, a blond woman was standing with her back facing us, looking at a photo album.
"Big house," Calla said. "Can't you just picture a bunch of kids running through here, coloring on the walls and screaming bloody murder?"
"You still could," I pointed out.
At that point, the woman turned around. "Jaclyn?" she asked.
My jaw dropped. "Margaret?" I said, just above a whisper.
We both screamed in unison and hugged.
"Okay, I guess you two know each other," Calla said.
"Jaclyn," Margaret said. She shook her head. "Why are you here?"
"I was going to ask you the same thing."
"Some woman named Grace Belkin called me," Margaret said. "She said she was going through Hawkeye's phone book and found my number. I just got here yesterday. Now. What about you?"
"Hawkeye came to Stockton," I said. "We met in Sioux Falls at a medical conference, and I wanted him to meet Calla. But--but nothing happened. Nothing at all."
"Jac, I'm not your mother." Margaret grinned.
"Speaking of CALLA..." prompted my daughter.
"This is my daughter, Calla Selena Waters. Does that meet with your approval, my darling child?"
"Yes, thank you."
"You look so much like your father," said Margaret.
"This is so weird," Calla said. "All of a sudden I have a father. Before I was just the daughter of a single parent, that all the old ladies had to fuss over and treat as though I was going to become pregnant before I was sixteen." She took in a deep breath. "Okay, that took a lot of air."
"Yes, Mrs. Johnson," Hawkeye called as he came up the steps. "I woudl like to keep thosepictures. Your parents only get married once, you know."
As he turned the corner and faced us, he dropped the boxes he had been carrying. "Margaret?"
"Oh, Hawkeye."
They embraced, and I felt the tiniest flicker of jealousy in my stomach.
Just the tiniest, though.