For all pertinent information see chapter one.

After the movies we went up to Raven's room and got ready for bed. Not to sleep, of course, just to lie down and talk for four hours like you're meant to do at every good slumber party!

No sooner had I settled into my side of the bed then Raven was turning to face me and asking me again, excitedly, what it was like with Lani. I blushed.

"Well, how much do you wanna know?" I asked, dreading the answer.

"What do you mean, how much?"

"Well, fuzzy water color, or scientific diagram?"

"Diagram!" she replied, and I had to laugh. Obviously, someone wasn't getting everything they needed from their so-called boyfriend!

I took a deep breath. "Well, for me, Lani was… I don't know how to begin. She taught me most of the Spanish I know that's not on the school curriculum… and in return, I taught her exactly how I like to be kissed." I could have sworn I heard a tiny moan from Raven, but told myself it was probably her just settling into the bed. "Raven, I don't know if I can talk about this sober," I whined.

She reached under the bed, rummaged for a moment and came up with an almost full bottle of tequila. "This work for you?" she asked, going back down and coming back up with a couple of shot glasses.

"You're the best, Rae," I told her, opening the bottle. The first shot burned all the way down, and we grimaced and laughed at each other. But, as is always the way, the second shot was just that little bit easier to stomach, and the third even more so. By the fourth, it was almost tasting good, and that's when I started to talk.

"Lani's a great kisser," I blurted out of the blue. I hadn't given any indication that I was ready to talk. "But I don't know what it is that you wanna know, Rae. Ask me something, I'll tell the truth, but don't make me give you Lesbian Loving 101 like some college professor!"

"Okay, well, how was it different kissing a girl than kissing a guy?"

I laughed. "It's the difference between using a loofah or a steel wool pad to exfoliate, Rae! Kissing a girl is so much better, they actually know what they're doing. And there's no annoying facial hair chafing your face. And their lips are so soft, and they smell so good… Lani always smells like fruit. I think it's her shampoo."

"Wow," Raven breathed.

"And another thing. One kiss from Lani turns me on so much more than all the drunken fumbling I ever did with Ben. One kiss from her and I'm ready to fall into bed with her… Well, until this afternoon, anyway. I didn't realize she was so jealous and possessive, and I really hate that."

"Ha, maybe I should lose Carlos and go find a girl to kiss," Raven joked, and I laughed bitterly.

"You won't dump him, Raven. You've had ample opportunity."

"Anyway, what about the rest of it?" Raven changed the subject. "What do two girls DO in bed?"

"Fingers and tongues," I told her, swaying a little. What, was I on my sixth or seventh shot by now? I'd lost count.

"Fingers and tongues?" she repeated skeptically.

"And lips and mouths and hands and soft kisses in all the right places," I breathed, getting caught up in the memory. I'd turned myself on now, and the alcohol wasn't helping matters. If we continued talking about this I just knew I was going to do something stupid…

"Show me," Raven whispered, sliding a little closer to me. I shook my head quickly to clear it, but she wasn't disappearing, my alarm wasn't going off. I wasn't dreaming, I was just drunk, and so was she. If I'd been sober I wouldn't have even considered it, but come on, this was what I'd been wanting since we were fourteen, do you really think I was going to pass up the chance? Not fucking likely.

I leaned in and brushed my lips over hers in what could possibly have been the lightest kiss in the history of kissing. This time I was sure she moaned. It was her who leaned back in and brought our lips back together, her who deepened the contact. I was suddenly just along for the ride.

And it was everything I'd imagined it to be, and more. I thought my heart would stop from the pure pleasure of it, I'd known Raven would be good, but this good was beyond my comprehension. I clung to her as she kissed me over and over again, her tongue parting my lips and brushing itself over mine. I actually heard myself whimper slightly as she finally let us come up for air.

"Oh my God," she breathed, staring into my eyes. "You're in love with me."

"I'm sorry," I whispered back, unable to break the eye contact. "I didn't mean to be…"

"When were you going to tell me?"

"I wasn't…"

She kissed me again, fiercely, almost bruising my lips. I pulled back.

"What's wrong?" she asked breathlessly.

"You're drunk," I replied, "and so am I. You have no idea how long I've wanted this for, how long I've loved you, Raven, but we can't do this now. Not like this. My pride won't let me settle for a drunken fumble, can't you see? If we're gonna do this, I need for it to be real, to be because you actually want me, not because you're drunk and I'm here. Do you understand what I mean?"

I think she did, but I had no way of telling at the time. I lay back against the pillows and felt her do the same.

"We're gonna talk about this in the morning," she told me, but honestly, I doubted if she would even remember any of this, come morning.

When I woke up Raven was still asleep, curled up in a ball next to me. It was all I could do not to kiss her right there and then, wake her up Sleeping Beauty style, but I stopped myself. If there was a chance she'd forgotten our drunken revelations last night, I was going to take it. I wanted so badly for her to figure it out for herself.

She woke gradually, her movements indicating that she was almost but not quite ready to face the day. When she finally opened her eyes, she yawned hugely and stretched, inadvertently letting me see all the muscles play under the skin of her torso. Whether or not she caught my stare is another of life's mysteries.

"Hey," she said huskily, her voice not yet woken up. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Hey."

"Uh, hey," I replied. My voice was huskier than normal too, but for entirely different reasons.

"So, do you want the shower first?" she asked, sitting up. I nodded, following her lead.

"I, uh, I had a good time last night," I fished, hoping I as being as subtle as I thought I was. She didn't take the bait, merely smiling and replying that she had too.

I took a little longer in the shower that I normally would have. I wasn't sure how to act around Raven. I didn't want to pretend nothing had happened, in case she remembered. But I didn't want to act all in love either. When I finally stepped out of the shower, dressed, she was waiting for me.

"God, does your head hurt as much as mine?" she asked ruefully. "What the hell did we drink last night?"

"Half a bottle of tequila," I laughed, relieved. She didn't remember. I was free to… well, I was off the hook, anyway, and for that I was grateful.

"So, I better get back home, I've got a ton of homework to do," I said, still smiling so she would know she hadn't been blown off. Yeah, right. As if I could possibly do homework, or anything else even remotely resembling normal life, now that I knew what Raven's lips felt like against my own.

"Yeah, that's cool," she smiled back. "Hey, Chels? We should do this again sometime."

As I was on my way downstairs with my stuff, though, I heard her on the phone. To Carlos, presumably, if the subservient tone of her voice was anything to go on. From what I could hear, she was making plans to see him later that afternoon. She didn't know I was listening, and she hung up before I came into view.

"Laters," I told her, giving her a sideways hug. "I'll see you on Monday."

"Hey, are you going to see Lani?" she asked shyly, her face turning red. "Cos, I mean, it's cool if you want to… I mean, not that you need my permission or anything, I just meant that I'm not going to be weird about it… except for the weirdness that is now… Just… okay, if you do end up hooking up with Lani today, you so have to tell me everything!"

"Okay, okay, I will," I laughed, heading out the door. I stood in Raven's driveway for a moment, contemplating what to do. Mostly I was thinking about the ache that had moved from my heart to settle between my legs, and how to relieve this ache. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed Lani.

"Hello?"

"It's me, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't take us seriously, and I'm sorry I hid us from Raven. I'm not sorry for loving her though. Wanna hook up?"

"Fuck yeah I do! When and where?"

She showed up at my house within minutes of me getting home, making me think she'd been sitting waiting for me to call. But even though she pulled out her best moves, I felt… empty. I couldn't pretend Lani was enough for me anymore. Not after last night. I did my best but my heart wasn't in it, and she could tell. Finally giving up, she crawled up next to me.

"It's not working, is it," she asked, quietly.

"I'm really sorry," I began, but she cut me off.

"Look, it's okay. At least you tried. I'll always love you, Chelsea, but I'm not who you want, okay? We all know that. I'm surprised Raven herself hasn't figured it out yet. I'm not mad. I'm just sad. I'm going to go." And she left.

And just like that, it was over.

I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to make sense of the last twenty four hours, but it wasn't happening for me. In a fit of desperation, and I'll never know exactly where this impulse came from, I called Eddie. I mean, with a bit of luck, Eddie's problems with Amber will help me forget my shit of a life, right?

I couldn't have been more wrong, as it turns out. When Eddie picked up the phone, and I said hey, he sighed in a way that was clearly designed to make me ask him what was wrong. I took the bait, more fool me.

"What's wrong?"

"Well, I'm not worried about Amber not wanting me anymore," he said glumly. "Chelsea, I think I have feelings for Raven."

"What?" I screeched. "When did that happen? Five minutes ago you were doing everything you could think of to try and get Amber back, and now you've changed your mind?"

"No, Chelsea, listen, hear me out," he pleaded. "I've liked her for a while, but I guess I only just realized it… Just with everything that's been happening lately, I've been as worried about her as you have… I guess, I'm more worried than I thought. I really like her!"

Not as much as I do. And what's more, you don't deserve her, I thought, but didn't say.

I don't know how I managed to get through that conversation without giving myself way, but I did, and coming out the other end I had convinced myself to take up drama, because clearly, I was a better actress than anyone had ever given me credit for. Eddie was convinced that I was a great friend who sympathized with his new found feelings for Raven, Raven was convinced I was a great friend who shared all her secrets, and Lani was convinced that I was someone worthy of her love.

I, personally, was convinced that I wasn't hungry enough for an evening meal, and went to bed and cried myself to sleep.

Monday morning dawned bright and sunny. It was going to be a beautiful day, and I cursed whatever higher entity was responsible for mocking me in such a way. Still, I got dressed, made myself look fabulous for no one in particular (Raven! Raven! Raven!) and trudged down the path and out the gate towards school.

I didn't see Raven, or Eddie, until I got to my locker. Eddie was there, and he looked worried and love struck, another combination that closely resembled his 'vision' face. He hadn't seen Raven either, and he was worried because the bell was about to ring and she'd be late.

Hmm, I mused to myself. Worried Eddie Boring and Vaguely Irritating Eddie. But again, I held my tongue. I was getting really good at that.

Raven came running up a couple of minutes later with moments to spare until the final bell. The three of us dove into our classroom, and it was only then that I noticed Raven's latest fashion accessory. It was a large white plaster cast encasing most of her left arm as far as the elbow.

"What the fuck?" I started to ask. "How the hell did you manage that between the time I left you and now?"

"Oh, it's not what you think," she grinned weakly. "Cory and I went roller blading, and I took a corner too fast and landed on my side, with my wrist under me. I'll be fine, it was a stupid accident."

The teacher called for silence then, which put a stop to what I had been about to say. Which was probably a good thing, because what I had been about to say was loud, angry, and disbelieving. There was no way a simple roller blading accident had caused Raven's injury. She didn't have another scratch on her, like she would have if she'd fallen the way she said. Physically, the only thing wrong with her was this cast on her wrist. And I was determined to get the real story out of her.

I didn't have to wait long. I cornered her in the bathroom between classes, dropped my bombshell.

"Raven, what really happened?"

"I told you, I fell," she began, but I cut her off.

"Bull SHIT you were roller blading, Raven. Stop insulting my intelligence by lying to me. What happened?"

"Don't get mad, okay?" she whispered, resigned. I fought back tears. I knew what was coming.

"It was Carlos, wasn't it?" I whimpered.

"It was my fault!" she insisted, tears running down her own cheeks. "I shouldn't have fucked him off, yet again. And now I've upset you! I'm such a fuck up, I can't do anything right!"

"Christ, would you listen to yourself?" I snapped, still crying. "This isn't ABOUT me. This isn't about anyone but YOU, and the fact that you are LETTING him DO this to you! That's why I'm upset! But you don't GET it, do you? And you never will!"

This would have been an excellent moment to storm out, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Much as it may have been like banging my head up against a brick wall, I still felt like I had to help Raven.

"Now tell me what happened!"

"He came over," she cried. "I invited him over, and everything was fine, and we were just sitting in the living room talking. And then he saw our DVDs, and asked me what I did last night, so I told him I had you over, and he lost it."

I broke down completely. Apparently now he was using me as an excuse to beat on her.

"He was yelling about how you're a lesbian and you were probably trying to convert me, and when I told him you're my best friend and I love you, he started slamming his fist into the sofa next to my head. I was freaking out but keeping it together, you know, because at least he was pounding on the sofa and not me. But then he stood up and grabbed me by the wrist…"

"The broken one?" I sobbed.

"No, the good one." She took a deep breath. "And he dragged me by my good wrist over to the kitchen door…"

God, I didn't want to hear this, because there was a part of me that knew exactly how this story ended, and that part of me wanted to skip the sharing portion of the morning and get straight to the tears.

"And he slammed the door on my now broken wrist."

"Just once?"

"Um, more like two or three times… I don't know. I think I passed out. When I woke up he was gone and Cory was standing over me, and we came up with the roller blading thing between us."

"I'm calling the fucking police," I ground out, pulling out my phone.

"No, Chelsea, please?" Raven begged. "He's not always like this. He's usually fine…"

"Oh for fuck's sake, Raven!" I screamed at her. "You just came to school with a broken wrist, courtesy of him! You have hereby forfeited your right to control this situation! I am calling the police and having Carlos done for assault, because what he does to you is NOT okay, Raven! It's not okay! And I can't stand by and let it happen anymore!"

I called the police and reported the assault. They came down to the school pretty promptly, all things considered. I mean, you hear stories about how slowly the wheels of justice turn. Raven was required to give a statement, as I had expected. I went with her, with the principal's permission. She wasn't talking to anyone but me anymore.

Anyway, to hear Eddie tell it, we caused quite the sensation. He was sitting in class with Carlos when the door opened and a police officer stepped in and quietly spoke with the teacher.

"Alvarez, gather your stuff and report to the office," the teacher told Carlos. Eddie watched him leave. Apparently Carlos seemed pretty pissed, but I wasn't worried when I heard that. Surely the worst was over now.