"Ugh, what are you doing? That's what got me into this state in the first place," yelled Lily, she was just about to go to sleep, when James decided he wanted to have sex and she was REALLY not in the mood.
"What? I was only…" protested James
"Oh I know what you were only doing. Don't you think I have enough to deal with without you slobbering over me? Ugh that really is all you think about,"
"Sweetheart…"
"Don't you sweetheart me"
"It was only a suggestion…"
"Suggestion you were practically groping me, I don't believe you said a word"
"We haven't you know in…"
"What? 3 days, oh I'm so sorry how will you ever survive?"
"There is no need to be like that"
"There is every need. You're as bad as some hormonally driven teenager, and if you're going to act like that you can do what they have to do, go and jerk off in the bathroom and pray to god I don't catch you"
"You're being ridiculous"
"Maybe I am"
"You definitely are"
"You know what you definitely are?"
"No, why don't you enlighten me, dear?"
"You're definitely sleeping on the couch tonight"
"What? Why?"
"Because you're a pig and I don't want to share a bed with you"
"So, I'll sleep in the spare room"
"Oh no you won't"
"What? Why?"
"The spare room is too comfortable for you, you don't deserve it. You'll sleep on the couch"
"Lily will you please be reasonable?"
"I would say I'm being very rational"
"Well maybe I'll sleep in the spare room no matter what you say"
"I would love to see you try"
James spent a very uncomfortable night on the sofa, he really wasn't brave enough to defy his wife. And he spent most of the next day on his knees begging Lily for forgiveness, because he knew she would never make the first move and she could hold a grudge for months.
Let this be a lesson to all husbands, when your wife is pregnant NEVER make the first move when it comes to sex.