WARNING: Extreme fluffiness and mushiness. I almost gagged while writing this. But I was just in one of those "moods."
I Gave You My Heart, And You Gave Me Death
I watched him, watched his every move. His dark hair, the way it fell into his eyes. His hands, his strong, calloused hands that could grip any sort of weapon.
"Itachi-sama," I called out. "Do you need any help?"
He glanced back at me. "No thank you, Tsukiko." He said quietly.
I closed my eyes and thought back to the day we had first met. It was in Konoha; we had bumped into each other in a weapons shop when we were both nine.
The moment I laid eyes on him, something had clicked. I hadn't known what it was, but it just felt so right.
But now I knew.
Love.
Every time I looked at him, I felt happiness, and ever time he looked at me, I felt utter bliss.
Did he know I felt?
No.
I never told him.
Why?
I was afraid.
Of what?
Rejection.
Sometimes I would have these dreams at night, where I would tell Itachi how I really felt, and he would reject me utterly, tell me how he hated me.
I always woke up with tears streaming down my face.
I looked at Itachi again, and my heart swelled.
I longed to tell him.
But couldn't.
x.X.x
Tsukiko looked up from the katana she was polishing when I came in.
"Oh, hello, Itachi-sama!" she said pleasantly. Her voice, usually so calming, sounded like nails across a chalkboard to me right now.
"How was your day?" she continued.
"Don't talk to me." I said shortly. I brushed past her roughly as I headed outside from the back door.
x.X.x
The girl looked at his retreating back, tears building up in her eyes.
Her expression was pitiful. Sorrow, bewilderment, confusion, hurt – all gathered into one look.
'What did I do now?" she said silently.
She loved him, but sometimes…
Tsukiko was his punching bag. Whenever he came back to headquarters from a particularly difficult mission, she was the one who would face the leftover frustration.
She always took the curses and blows without a word. If you love someone, that's what you do, right?
But the cold words…that was what she couldn't stand…every word cut into her like a thousand knives.
"Itachi-sama!" she cried. Tsukiko ran out the door after him.
She grabbed his arm. He spun around and brushed it off angrily.
"What do you want?" he said icily.
"Itachi, what's wrong?" Tsukiko asked softly. "Did your mission go well?"
Itachi growled, "The Kyuubi escaped. Now go away."
"But –"
"I said go away. I don't want to talk to you, I don't want to look at you, I don't want to be anywhere near you!" Itachi said harshly.
"Itachi-sama…" Tsukiko murmured.
The look on her face was heartbreaking. It was comprised of so many emotions – heartache, mainly; grief; pain; and something else, something nameless.
It was the look of one who had just had their heart shattered.
"But…I – I…love you…" she whispered.
Itachi glared at her. "What did you say?" he said in a low, venomous whisper.
"I love you," she repeated quietly.
Itachi gave no response; he stared at her, emotionless.
"I said I love you," Tsukiko said, her voice stronger. "I've loved you since the moment we met….Please say it back!"
The dark shinobi felt a tug at his heart, but then it was gone. He had no heart. And all of a sudden, the only thing he felt was annoyance, irritation. All aimed at the girl who loved him.
"I don't love you," he said coldly. "I don't even like you remotely. You're just a tool of mine, ready to fight when I need you to, ready to heal when I say so."
It was then and there.
Her heart broke in two.
x.X.x
"Hey Itachi, where'd Tsukiko go?" Kisame asked his partner later that night.
Itachi gave no response, just gazed blankly at the wall.
"Go check on her!" Kisame insisted. He had no idea what had occurred earlier.
Itachi rose without a word and went outside.
x.X.x
I calmly surveyed my surroundings. It was a full moon; the soft radiance fell on my back.
I heard soft footsteps; I turned my head slightly and saw him.
"I knew you'd come," I said softly.
Not a word fell from Itachi's lips.
I turned to face him. His face, so perfect; his eyes, so dark.
The darkness was consuming. I was falling into a black abyss.
'Not yet, Tsukiko,' I told myself. 'Not yet.'
"Do you love me?" I demanded. "Do you?"
He didn't reply. And I knew his answer.
I turned my back to him and looked at the moon. "I gave everything to be with you. I became a missing-nin just so I could stay with you. I abandoned my friends, my family. I sacrificed everything."
I turned back to him. "And what did I get?"
A broken heart.
"I gave you my heart," I said, trying hard to keep my voice from trembling. "I gave it to you freely, and you threw it away. You threw my love away."
I let out a shrill laugh and inched towards the edge of the cliff. "And now that my heart is destroyed, I don't have anything left, do I?" My voice became hysterical. "Do I, Itachi-sama?"
"You –" Itachi started, but I cut him off.
"I don't," I said simply. I smiled an odd little smile at him. "I don't."
And I jumped.
x.X.x
I stayed where I was and watched her go over the edge.
It wasn't my fault; who had given her permission to love me?
I loved no one.
No, wait.
I loved myself.
And at the same time despised myself.
I shook my head at Tsukiko's death. 'Such a pity. She was still a strong ninja; plenty of potential lost.'
Without a backward glance, I turned around and walked away.
x.X.x
I loved him.
And he broke me.
He was my downfall.
Love was my downfall.
Itachi, are you listening?
I gave you my heart, and you gave me death.
So, yeah. Extremely...ugh...