Author: kaly
Rating: K
Category: angst
Spoilers: vague spoilers for the various books.
Series: Brothers' Bond Timeframe: Ron's six. Charlie's 16.
Summary: Ron's first experience with loss.
Thank you: To those who read and reacted and Nix for the beta.
Notes: Second in a series (of ten), Brothers' Bond, focused around Ron and Charlie. In it, Charlie is ten years older than Ron. Becomes AU after GoF canon.
Previous stories in the series: #1 - The Path of Thorns
Disclaimer: JKR. Scholastic. WB. Their toys, I'm just borrowing the guys, I promise! Besides, I'd use Charlie more if they were mine. ;)
The Lesson of Loss
Charlie shifted in his seat, causing the child that was curled up in his lap to mutter softly and cuddle closer. Sighing, Charlie shifted again, trying to restore some feeling to his legs, which had gone numb sometime earlier. When Ron didn't stir, Charlie felt only relief. The semblance of peace that surrounded them had been a long time in coming.
It was late, the house dark -- the Burrow quiet as only the middle of the night could manage. Thankful for small favors, Charlie let his head fall back against the chair. He stared at the ceiling for a long moment before letting his eyes fall closed. Even still he could see, in his mind's eye, the dried, salty tracks that still covered Ron's face.
Instinctively he tightened his hold on his little brother, pulling him closer if that were possible. Loss was a lesson everyone learned, even if things had been better in the days since Ron was born. But if he could have spared Ron that lesson, if not forever than at least a while longer, Charlie would have gladly done so. After all, Ron was only six years old.
Tabby had been a stray cat Ron had taken a liking to. Their mum had been insistent that the cat wasn't coming into the house, what with two owls and a rat already there. Ron hadn't been deterred, however. He loved the cat all the same, giving it a name, even if it wasn't a very original one.
Charlie had been amused, watching Ron care for the stray. He fed him, petted him and played with him, all the things six year olds do when they find the pet that is truly their own. And when one day Tabby suddenly had a collar, no one at the Burrow dared to argue with the addition.
It had been that morning when Ron had run into Charlie's room, frantic, his face pale and hair askew. Charlie had felt his heart break for Ron. The lesson of loss had come far too soon.
"Charlie!"
Charlie looked up, startled, and smiled at his little brother. "What is it, Ron?"
Ron, standing in the doorway, began chewing on his bottom lip. "It's Tabby. He's gone."
"Gone?" Charlie asked, motioning for Ron to walk ahead. "Ron, he is an outdoor cat..." He hoped the placating tone might calm Ron. His heart fell when it didn't.
Ron shook his head forcefully from side to side. "No. He's always here for breakfast. But he's not. I can't find him!"
"Ron, calm down," Charlie said, dropping his hands onto Ron's shoulders. "Where have you looked?"
Ron took a deep breath, counting the places on his fingers as he named them. "In the grove, the garden, around the house. I've looked everywhere, Charlie!"
"How about under the house?" Charlie asked, trying to think of some place the cat might have gone. "Did you look there?"
Ron shook his head, taking a stuttered breath.
"Well, let's try that, then, okay?"
Ron looked at his brother with wide eyes and Charlie couldn't miss the trust that was there. Along with hope. "Okay," Ron said in a small voice.
"Okay."
But Tabby hadn't been under the house. Or in the shed. Or hidden in the tall grasses that grew close to the Burrow. And as the hour grew late Charlie saw the hope fade from Ron's eyes. Even though he argued with himself that the animal wasn't gone, rather it had merely wandered away for a while, he began to fear as well.
The end came when they returned to the garden. It was getting dark and Charlie was out of ideas for places to search. There was a new gnome hole, Charlie had noted absently. But what caught his attention was the small band of color that rested just inside the hole. Leaning closer he had recognized the collar Ron had given Tabby.
He barely had time to pick up the broken cloth from the ground when he heard Ron cry behind him. Turning quickly he saw the anguished look on his brother's face. It was the moment they both realized what had happened -- and that they would never see Tabby again.
Charlie had rushed forward, dropping onto his knees in front of Ron. The child's chest heaved, jerky breaths going in and out far too fast. His mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out. The tears started soon after and Charlie pulled Ron into his arms.
He had stood, his little brother still in his arms and carried him back to the house. The small collar still clutched in his hand, he had fought his own tears at the sounds of Ron's pain.
They had been sitting in an overstuffed chair in their father's study ever since. When they had come into the house, Ron's tears echoing loudly, Charlie had warned off his other brothers with a glare. Their mother had been harder to convince, but Charlie had begged for some time alone with Ron. She had not been entirely happy, but had acquiesced.
"Why?" Ron asked, some time later.
Charlie shook his head, brushing Ron's hair back from his forehead. "I don't know."
His tears had slowed, but Charlie could still hear the soft hiccups that accompanied them. Ron laid his head against Charlie's chest, and Charlie wrapped his arms around him more tightly.
"Stupid cat, getting caught by a gnome." The words were bitter, but there was no malice in Ron's voice. The sadness, however, was almost too much to bear.
"Ron..." Charlie began, but couldn't think of a single thing that he could say to make it better.
Ron stuttered, another round of tears shining in his eyes. "I didn't mean it."
Charlie smiled softly, nodding. "I know," he whispered. "You loved him."
"Why did it have to happen, Charlie?" Ron asked, not for the first or even second time. Part of Charlie wanted to run away from the faith he could hear in Ron's voice. Ron's trust that he would know the answers, when he had so few, tore at him. He feared letting his little brother down.
All Charlie could do was repeat himself. "I don't know. I wish I did."
"I miss him," Ron said, tangling his small hands in Charlie's robe and pressing his face into the fabric.
Charlie closed his eyes and pressed his cheek to the top of Ron's head. He felt like he couldn't breathe, helpless in the face of Ron's grief. "I'm so sorry, little brother."
Charlie held Ron as he cried, not stirring from that spot until hours later. Even when his legs grew numb and his back began to ache, he refused to move. It wasn't until their mum came into the study, moving so quietly Charlie jumped when she touched his arm, that he was pulled from his place.
"Mum?"
"Nearly grown or no, Charlie Weasley, it's time for you to sleep." When he began to argue, she shook her head. "Sleep. In your own bed, not tangled up in this chair."
He looked from her to Ron. "But..."
"No buts." Although the words were scolding, she smiled sadly at him. "You've done your part, Charlie. Let me take care of my little one for a while."
"I didn't know what to say..." Charlie said, as she took Ron from him.
This time when Molly smiled, there were tears in her eyes. "No one ever does, dear. All we can do is learn to accept that sometimes things happen." Charlie saw something flicker across her face, her eyes shadowed. He wondered, briefly, what she was remembering. His thoughts were interrupted when she smiled faintly and said, "And to always hold close to one another."
She shifted Ron to one arm, the boy instinctively wrapping his arms around her neck but not waking. Cupping Charlie's cheek in her hand, she kissed him on the forehead. "To bed."
He stood and winced when his back cracked sharply. Taking a deep breath he nodded, though his eyes strayed back to Ron's sleeping face. "Mum..."
"He'll be fine," she said, holding Ron close. "Just give him time and be with him. 'Tis all you can do."
"I love you," Charlie said, dropping a kiss onto her cheek. Seemingly of its own volition, his hand strayed to Ron's head. "I love you, too," he whispered. A moment later when he again looked at his mother's face he was startled to see tears in her eyes once more. "Mum?"
She blinked quickly and the tears were gone. It happened so fast that Charlie almost doubted he had seen them. "Good night, baby," she said softly, gesturing him toward the door. With a last look at Ron, Charlie nodded. He knew his little brother was in the best of hands -- even if they weren't his own.
"Good night."
end