Chapter Two

A/N: Chapter two! Yay! Well if some of you have read my other story Of Death Eaters And Blood Traitors you might have noticed the updates were very often. I noticed that doesn't help at all. Nope.. not at all. Makes short, not interesting chapters and ruins the story sort ofish. Which is why i'm taking this one slowly and making the chapters longer. I'll probably make two or three diary entries in each chapter. That should work. Blech, you probably don't wanna hear this do you? Fine, i'll give you what you want. Here is chapter two.

Oh, and I forgot this last chapter I think: I do not own Harry Potter.

September 4th, in the library

The past four days have been both wonderful and horrible. The bad thing is that I'm swamped with homework. Apparently teachers don't take the N.E.W.T.S too lightly. That's why I'm here in the library, waiting for Millicent (who was supposed to be her ten minutes ago, ugh her).

Anyways, because of that homework problem I haven't been able to write to much. So I decided to make a quick entry now.

The first day back started out horribly. You remember that list I made? Yeah, it was because of that. I woke up in the morning and checked my closet for something to wear. Nothing that was going to go with it. I ended up having to borrow clothes from my other friend Daphne. Thankfully we have just about the same cloth size. When I finally got showered and dressed and ready to go out I looked myself in the mirror. Not too different, but Millicent started complaining on how I'm starting to 'care' to much. The other girls also looked at me like I was crazy. I let it slip past me. Why should I care right?

When we got into the Great Hall he didn't even notice me! Draco was just sitting there being swarmed in the usual crowd of girls who were all asking him to go with on the upcoming Hogsmeade weekend. It hasn't even been announced yet. But I'm supposed to not care, get over him. That part on my list didn't work out to well either.

During breakfast me and Millie talked like we normally do. We got our schedules whined about getting classes with the Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs. No Ravenclaw this year. At least they were smart. I looked down a few people and saw Draco and the other Slytherin seventh year boys weren't to happy about it either. I smiled a bit when he looked over at me. Now, the thing that completely ruined my morning happened. He smiled back. Well more of a smirk.. But it is still something isn't it? I couldn't help but keep looking at him. Whenever he smirked it made him look millions of times more gorgeous. My plan wasn't succeeding. And I don't fail anything. This was not going to be my first.

After breakfast we had our first class of double Charms with the Gryffindors. That didn't go to well, seeing as me and Draco were partnered up. Why do you have to be so cruel to me world? Why?

We were doing a review, which was easy, but I kept getting nervous around him. It wasn't the first time we've had to do things like this, and we'd always hung out before (well sort of). But I couldn't help it. Just the fact that he was going to get married to someone else.

"Hey Pans," he said smirking and nodded towards the substitute who seemed to have fallen asleep, "Come here," he added and walked over to the other side of the class room where there were a few armchairs. All the Slytherins had always wondered what Flitwick used them for, and came to the conclusion that he sat and sipped tea between classes or something. Draco sat down in one of them and sighed while I sat in the one next to his.

"How's your summer been?" he asked casually.

"Okay, my parents have been in and out all break so that was nice.." I answered and trailed off. I didn't want him to know how I felt about my father.

"Hmm," he hummed in response. I could tell he was looking over at Potter and his little crew.

"How was yours?" I finally asked.

"Pretty good, except that whole arranged marriage thing," he answered me in a nonchalant tone.

"Oh. Do you know who it is?" I asked a bit depressed. I just can't help it.

"Not yet, probably some rich Bulgarian or French girl," he said and looked at me, "the whole thing annoys me. I mean, am I not capable of choosing my own wife?"

"I thought you always said you don't show emotion," I said with a slight smirk. He narrowed his eyes at me.

"Not towards idiots like them," he said and nodded his head in the Gryffindor's direction. I just raised an eyebrow at him.

"I love you Pansy," he said and looked me in the eyes. Yeh, my heart stopped and my breath hitched. He actually said those words. Not Pans, or Parkinson, but Pansy. Although my moment was ruined when he finally spoke again.

"You're like a sister to me. You can't say that's not emotion."

I felt like crying that moment. A sister? I was a sister to him. That's it. I mean, I guess it helps me getting over him in a way. But it hurt so much when he said that for some reason. I tried to cover it up by rolling my eyes at him. He just smirked back. We just sat there watching the others for a while in silence. I didn't want to talk, since I knew my voice would sound all weird.

That wasn't the best class of the day for me. But of course I dealt with it and practically ran out of the classroom and down to potions. Towards the end things did lighten up a bit, I finally started talking to Draco. I need to get over it.

Well look who it is, my dear friend Millie. She's finally here. I have to go and do some bloody homework now.

Pansy P, the Malfoy sister.

September 6th, Out by the lake

Two day have gone by since I last wrote in you my friend. That's six days since I found out how Draco really felt about me. I've tried hard to forget about it and get over him (might I add it worked pretty well most of the time) but sometimes its just so hard.

On the plus side I think I have something to help me keep my mind off of him. No, not homework or my friends. They announced a Hogsmeade weekend (oddly, because those aren't normally so early in the year. But I suppose it had something to do with Granger being head girl and best friends with Potter and Weasley). So anyways someone asked me! Not some dork either. I felt so happy for once since I got here at the school.

I was heading down towards the great hall for lunch. It was a warm day, so I had decided to wear my hair up with my summer uniform. Something I didn't wear much. I hated skirts most of the time, and especially this outfit because it looks a bit like a muggle one because there aren't any robes with it. But it felt nice not to be too warm.

Anyways as I was walking down the hall I felt someone's eyes boring into the back of my head. It's a but creepy how I notice these things sometimes. So naturally I turned around.

"Whoever you are stop following me," I snapped looking around and saw someone come from around the corner. His name was Josh Connory. He was in the Ravenclaw house, and quite popular with everyone. Especially the girls. Sort of like Cedric Diggory or Roger Davies, or hey even Draco.

"Who are you talking to?" he asked and looked around. I could feel myself blush. I couldn't help it, it wasn't like me to be humiliated.

"You," I finally replied and fully turned around to look at him.

"I wasn't even.." he started then shook his head, "Never mind."

I quickly looked away when his eyes settled on me, I couldn't be caught staring at someone could I? Of course not.

"You heading down to the great hall?" he finally asked. I snapped out of my thoughts and nodded, "Great, I'll walk you down," he said with a smile.

We walked for quite a bit in silence. It wasn't one of those comfortable ones either. It was the kind that drives you mad. One that makes you want to start talking about nothing just to break it. Finally my wish came true.

"Pansy.." he started. I was a bit surprised at first that he knew my name, but we'd had a lot of classes together since fourth year. So why wouldn't he?

"Hmm?" I hummed and looked at him. He was looking at me, although this time he wasn't smiling.

"I was wondering, if you'd like to go Hogsmeade with me," he said and made a small smile. We had stopped walking and I just stood there. Now when I think about it, it was something I would have killed myself for. I mean what person does that when they're asked out? Well maybe a lot of people, but not me.

"I'd like that," I finally managed to get out. I smiled weakly at him. I kept feeling like I was betraying Draco or something, even though I was never going out with him in the first place. We'd never been anything. The only time we really came close was at the Yule Ball. We'd gone together and had a great time dancing with each other. Although he did complain about Granger and Krum together a bit, but so did I. It was just that one thing he said at the end of the evening. That he wasn't ready for a relationship. Of course I believed him then, but now I think it was just bullshit. But maybe being just friends is good for us. Right? Oh.. it's hard to think that it is going to end up this way. After all those years of liking him, and all those papers with Pansy Malfoy written on them it feels so odd. That, it just isn't going to happen.

Maybe I'm over exaggerating about the whole thing. I should be happy he asked me. It could be my chance to move on from Draco and have somewhat of a life. I mean, we'll still be friends.

Ugh, no use. I kept thinking if I stayed single maybe there was a chance the two of us would eventually happen. My list is working perfectly except for that one little flaw.

7. Get it into my head me and Draco are only friends. We will never be anymore.

Not something really.. Workable on if that even makes sense. But I need to do what it says do I not? Anyways, my hand is hurting and my ink is running low. I must go for now.

Pansy P. Recovering Obsesser.

A/N: There it was. I hope you liked it, I don't know how I feel about this chapter. Am I taking things too fast? I don't want this to end up being a really long story either, so I guess it should work. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading it and will keep checking for updates and keep reading my story. Your reviews mean a lot to me

Rampart