Chapter Seven: Clockwork Little Happiness
The strange object slithered through my hands as I strained to clutch it. It made its way up the bed sheets as I contorted my hands to grab the thing. Every time I grasped it though it slithered away through my fingers. It was oily and greasy and was barely bigger than a half dollar. It found its place in the middle of my chest and dug down into me, like a worm burrowing down into the moist dirt on a rainy day. My insides began to boil and squirm about, the creature was eating me from the inside. No I wouldn't let it do that, I threw my hand down in the hole after it. I felt around in my stomach for it, burning my hand. I made way to my intestines and used my fingernails to dig away the flesh covering them up. I found the worm crawling around in there slowly eating me away. I grabbed it in between my thumb and forefinger and slowly pulled it out of my body, it writhed uncontrollable, trying to break away but I wouldn't let it. I brought the disgusting worm up to my eyes. Tiny needle like legs protruded from its underside in thousands of different places, it had no mouth or any eyes, just a scaly backside which exposed its insides. It cried out in pain as I tightly closed my fist, squishing the thing. I laughed at it in victory and then shoved it my mouth and swallowed it.
The loud sound of the TV in the next room woke me up. Without thinking I pressed both of my cold, sweaty hands up to my chest. I was relieved, there wasn't any hole. I don't know, that dream felt pretty real. Lately that's the way its been. Every dream that I've been having have begun to feel a little too real than they should have. It's getting harder and harder for me to tell the difference between reality and dreams now. As if the line separating them has somehow ceased to exist, allowing the two to mingle with each other causing catastrophic results.
Ughh, I feel terrible this morning. Unusual, quite frequently I feel extremely well in the morning. Covered in sweat from sleep, my hair tangled up, and my eyes sealed shut, I felt terrible. I had to literally rip the covers off from my sweaty, slimy, and sticky body. I undressed right on spot but that didn't cool me down at all. I walked over to the bathroom, my feet sticking to the soft carpet. Luckily my bedroom was connected to the bathroom. I knocked but no one answered, empty. I walked in and locked the door behind me.
The shower water was nice and cold, numbing my body as it slid down towards my feet. As it washed away the heat, my mind unclogged and my thoughts started delving into anything I could think of. Everything happening lately has been rather odd. The strange dreams became more frequent and disturbing though they were all horror based, nothing like the one the night at the hospital. The townspeople of Silent Hill started acting more strangely as well. Whenever I go out alone or accompanied by Kara they avoid us and avoid making eye contact with us. Kara really doesn't seem all too perturbed by it, by I am. It's bring up the dark past again. The anger and hate with it. I'm constantly hounded by remnants of memories of my mother and father, their fights, my beatings from her, and my father's murder.
Three years before we moved to Mansfield is when it happened, the night my father was murdered. It was on a Saturday night, I'll never forget that. Late at nigh during one of the routine fights about, you guessed it, me. I don't know what exactly it was about, the small details you know, because I was upstairs in my room hiding under my blankets in my dark room.
I heard their voices, but that's all. The noise was muffled by my walls. I guess they cared about the conversation too much to let me hear any of it. Protection for most parts, not for me, but for my damn mother. I didn't dare move from my bed at all for fear of being cut up by mother again and that Digger would emerge from my closet to get me again like He usually does the nights that my parents fought. He made sure I didn't hear them. I don't know why though. Why would he want to prevent me from hearing them? It's not like I would understand. Realization dawned on me at that moment, now, I could understand it all now. This is why he was protecting me, all this time I thought he was protecting my mother, but no it was me. A little too late Digger the Dog though.
Their screams got louder, I could hear my father more prevalently because of his deep voice but my mother's piercing shriek was almost just as loud. God, thinking back onto this now makes me wonder how the hell it was possible that they could've gotten away with all this screaming and shouting with the neighbors. I'm surprised the cops didn't show up at the door with a domestic call. You got me, I'll never figure that out.
The shouting awoke Addie in the next room, she was only four or five at the time. All this yelling couldn't have been good for her. Four years old and having to hear crap like this. Yet again my fault, I'm sorry Addie. Your life was hell because of me, well I hope its better now that I'm gone.
They didn't seem to hear her though, and that's surprising, my mother always fussed over Addie. Well, that's good, at least Addie has a good mother. The fight continued as I let my mind wander and eventually I fell asleep. When I awoke in the morning I crept downstairs hoping to sneak something to eat before my mother awoke. But once I reached the bottom of the stairs I realized that she was already awake, now I know that she was up all night. The horrid scene entered my eyes, the walls were splattered with blood as was the floor and all the furniture. I crept up to the kitchen and used the wall for cover. I peered over and saw my mother standing over a bloody lump on the kitchen floor. She had a large meat cleavers in both hands, deep at work slicing my father into pieces. That's where it ended, that's all that I could remember. I turned the shower knob letting the water slowly die out until nothing more came. I stood there, heavily breathing, my hands pressed again the wall and the glass shower door. Tears managed to escape from my tightly closed eyes. How could she? How could she do that to him, that monster!
I opened the door quickly and strongly, slamming on the rack. Stepping out into the cold bathroom. I didn't think much of what I was doing, I was in too much of a hurry. I dressed and walked out of the room and sat on my bed, lost in nothing at all. I just sat there dazed and confused, staring at the carpet. I'm unsure of what to do next. I know I have to do it by I don't really want to . Well, I guess it cant' be helped, I have to know. I got up and left the room.
Kara was in the living room watching TV. She smiled at me as I passed her on my way to the door. She looked up at me forgetting what she was doing.
"Darren, where are you going?" She asked curiously.
"Don't worry. I'm just going for a walk. I'll be back in a few minutes." I said not even turning around to face her. This seemed to make her worry even more.
"Don't worry? If your just going for a walk why would you say that?"
"I don't know." I said, I really didn't feel like talking to her at this very moment.
"You're going to see her aren't you?" She said in a whisper, she knew this is a touchy subject.
"Yes." I said as I opened the door and stormed out the door slamming behind me.
Once outside I made my way to the bus station which was on the other side of town. Nearly a forty minute walk. Their were few people and cars out. They gave me that same feeling of rejection and fright as before. Man, what is their problem? Why do they look at me that way? Stop it!
The walk passed by quicker than it should have and the next thing I knew I was on a bus, straight through to Mansfield, fearing the moment I would have to confront her and learn the truth. The bus ride also passed by quicker than it should have. The bus was practically empty except for a tall man dressed in a black suit and hat. He sat towards the front, about the third row back. I chose a nice comfortable seat in the back. The bus was clean and smelled like lemons. The trip there wasn't very bad, nobody got on or off. I dozed off numerous times and awoke to feel the eyes of the man upon me. I looked away from him whenever that happened though. His eyes on me felt awkward, I didn't like it.
Finally we were there. It appeared the man and I got off at the same place. The street we got off in was in the center of Mansfield. It was very busy and he disappeared into the crowd as did I. Since we lived on the outskirts of town I got a cab, it was only about a twenty minute drive from there. We stopped in front of my old house, the same as ever, paint fading a little, but that was the only major difference. I gave the cabbie a hundred dollar bill to wait for me and that I would only be a second. I didn't expect him to be there when I returned though.
I walked up the path to our house in the morning mist. The moist ground under my feet squeaking as my shoes connected with it. The birds were singing there songs and the flowers were opening. No came from inside the house. I tried the handle. Locked as was expected. Screw it, I knocked on the door heavily. It was more like a banging though if you want to get down to the nitty gritty. I'm pretty damn angry at the moment and don't really care who I wake up. A few moments later I felt upset because I realized in doing this I would wake Addie up. Poor girl, hasn't she gone through enough already. Obviously not my dear.
A few seconds later and the door swung open revealing my mother. She was still in her nightgown, her gray hair messed about, her eyes covered in purple puffiness, but her anger was about as inconspicuous as a stain on a shirt. Her angriness turned to pure surprise and terror when she saw me standing there on her doorstep in the early morning. She looked truly scared, but of what my dear, of me darling. But that look of fright was only momentary as she hid under her anger.
"And just what the ruddy hell do you think you're doing here!" She screamed in her banshee like voice.
"I'm here to see you mommy, now aren't you going to be a dear and invite me in to my own house. I've been out all night and I'm awfully tired. I'm so sorry I made you worry." I hugged her and went in, pushing her aside. She was too surprised at first to do anything, she just merely stood there dumbfounded. I went to the kitchen and poured myself a large glass of orange juice and sat down at the table, drinking it in small sips.
The woman which I so hate to call my mother made her way to the kitchen towards me. She grabbed the cup out of my hands and threw in the sink, the glass breaking and shattering in every direction.
"Well now What'dya go and do that for you bitch!" I said calmly.
"Now listen here you little shit! You have about five seconds to get out of my house before I call up the police!" She yelled, spit flying in my face.
"So your going to call them up and confess. Hey brother you better come and bring the Priest with you. No thanks I don't want any fries with that but I would like some Human Fingers if you got them. No? Then I guess I will take the fries!" I yelled back in her face madly. I felt like hitting her. No that's an understatement. I feel like ripping out her throat. Something brought out the life of the animal I've always tried to hide. It was free at last. I went insane, and overdose of madness.
"What are you talking about?" She said, becoming scared.
"What do I want, what the hell do you want bitch! Oh you don't want much just a salad? Ahh that's too bad! Because I just ordered fries for you! And God as my witness you are going to eat them and you are going to like them!" I screamed, it echoed throughout the house. Footsteps descended down the stairs. My mother backed into a corner.
"No! Stay away! NOOOO!" She screamed at me as she fell onto the floor and crawled backwards against the counter. Tears began to pour down her face and she began to choke on herself.
Oh, don't worry darling. I'm not going to do much. Mmm, it's nothing' that you haven' dun a'ready." I said calmly.
"NO PLEASE DON'T!" She screamed, her eyes flickered as she looked beyond me into the other room.
"Addie call the police honey! Do it now! Your brother, he's gone crazy honey hurr-" She never finished what it was that she was saying. I turned around and stared deeply into the little girl's eyes.
"Oh now listen here missy, you'll do nothing' of the sort yeh go'me?" She shook her violently and ran upstairs. I turned back around to my mother.
"Well now there's no more distractions we ken finish naw." I walked towards her. She stood up without hesitation and grabbed a large meat cleaver out of the drawer beside her.
"Stay away you crazy bastard or I swear I'll cut you up, just like a did your scumbag father!" She yelled at me.
"Oh, honey are you confusing me wit someone else? It's me, yer darlin' Jean. Don't yeh recognize me?" I asked. I has ter get the knife from her. She's tha one thas goin to die to-day. I ran towards her and grabbed her arm, tryin to get tha knife offa her. She wouldn't let it go though. She forced me back and sliced at me. The knife cut me in my chest.
"Oh, yeh bitch!" I yelled as I took her head in my hands and slammed it down on tha counter. Once, twice, three times. Her skull cracked and blood started to pour out onto the floor. My evil desire wasn't satiated yet though I did return back to my normal state. I continued banging her head until all signs of life in her depleted. Her skull became nothing more than a lump of dust and her wobbly flesh started to splash in the blood. She dropped the knife when she died. I reached down and picked it up of the floor, licking the blood off it. I set to work on her body, slicking and carving it up in the most beautiful ways. Her flesh separated from her bone very cleanly. I started two piles on the kitchen counter, her flesh in one pile and her bones in the other. Very shortly after beginning I turned my mother into nothing more than a couple of piles of remains on the kitchen counter. No need for a requiem hear my dear, she was a sinner.
I left the house after that extremely happy of what I had just done. Oh God how long I wished to do that. How long it's been that I've wished I could kill her. To bathe in her blood. And now I have. My clothes lay in shreds and I was doused in blood and pieces of flesh. Once I emerged out of the house, the cab pulled away in a cloud of smoke. Damn liar. I'll cut him up too, you just wait, I'll make him pay. As I neared the curb of the road a bright object glistened in the noon sunlight. I approached quite eagerly. When I saw what it was my mouth dropped to the ground, and stayed there.
The heart pendant lay on the asphalt. One word came to mind: Kara. Something must be wrong with her. From that moment on things were unclear. I don't remember how, but somehow I managed to get back to Silent Hill covered in blood and flesh. Once I got to our apartment building I ran up the short steps. Just as I reached the door, a tall man in black walked out, he had a large hat on and dark sunglasses. He smiled and nodded at me. I don't have time to waste away here in a conversation with some stranger. I ignored him and ran inside the building, all the way to our floor.
I stood there, staring at the back of the door leading into my apartment. I didn't want to go in. I was afraid of the unknown. I haven't the faintest idea of what I am going to find. I know it can't be too good. Her pendant was all the way in Mansfield, New York. That means either somebody brought it there or she was there herself. And I know the latter is highly improbably so I chose to entertain the former. I opened the door and stepped into hell.
The place was hell. Blood covered the ceilings, the floors, the walls, the windows boarded up. The furniture was destroyed and broken. Large smears of blood led into the Kara's room. I followed it, not willing to accept the reality of the truth. Tears started to fall down my cheeks and I started to cry and moan in pain.
The door into her room was chained up. There was no way in hell I would be able to get in there using it. It was padlocked and boarded up. I almost gave up when I noticed a hole in the wall next to the door, about three feet over. Are you ready to dance butterflies and echo the insane to me?
I slowly approached it, deep in apprehension, for I knew that I wouldn't be safe. I thought of the dream I had at the hospital and the hanging cadavers. I looked in the bloody hole. I could see into her room. It was the scene of a horrific slaughter. I scrunched my face and started to wail. NOO! Kara! No, how could they? How could they!
Parts of her body lay scattered about the room. Her legs were in the corner near a rocking chair. One of her arms hanging from a hook in the wall, the other one out of sight or gone entirely. The Biggest part of her body lay on the bed. The pink covers stained with crimson blood. It was her waist and up. Her insides were dripping out over the corner of the bed accompanied by a river a blood. Her face was severed nearly in half. Her face so distorted I could hardly tell that it was her.
I choked on puke and fell down over her vomiting on the floor and crying too. An intense whirring headache erupted in my brain. The room revolved around me as I gagged and choke. A pool of darkness opened up at my feet. I dove in, in an attempt to escape this world. Hoping that this was nothing but another delusion. And then everything was dark.