3/23/05

Ok, my update time is going to be getting longer, I'm afraid, after this. The problem is, the players won't COOPERATE! This story keeps trying to become ANGSTY, and although I like angsty, this story is intended to be amusing! But Aerie keeps acting like a catty know-it-all, Miroku won't say properly wise things, Inuyasha is clueless and OOC by turns, Kagome keeps losing her temper, and the plot keeps throwing up hard things like Kohaku and Lel' attacking together and then a scene I was trying to write that was supposed to be funny came out just DEPRESSING, and it SHOULD have been funny, and I'm a failure:bursts into tears: Oh, and sorry about the dividers last couple of chapters. It won't let me into QuickEdit for some reason, but my own dividers won't upload. Grrrrr.

Dedication: This chapter is dedicated to biggest anime fan, who has reviewed all my chapters, (except nine and four,) was the only person to review the first one, and has been so wonderfully helpful! I held this chapter up for her, but she seems to be busy with something, so I'm going ahead. (Could have gotten two chapters out this vacation, too, if I hadn't been waiting.)

Disclaimer: Once again, I do not own Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippou, Miroku, Shayanui, or Sango, nor do I have title to the Inu-verse. Aerie bought herself free, so now I don't own her either. But at least I have a king's ransom in the stories she paid! (Didn't you know, in the Borderlands stories are the preferred currency. And in Pepperland all things are possible!)

medlii: Ooh, you wish he'd stayed longer? Might have been fun, but I'd spent kind of too long on that one night already, and he hadto be okay with the dawn because I had absolutely no other ideas. Well, I did, but I wince as much as Aerie at the thought of her poking around in his head, and the others would have brought the plot off track. Actually I think they did have hair dye, but only for rich people and they'd have it made for them and everything. I know they had tooth-blackening stuff. But I meant the hair dye just in terms of something to turn his hair black. You ought to feel special. I'm not one of Keeks' fans either, but my, she should do things for the plot. Didn't see the Star Wars preview. Have no TV. What was it?

NefCanuck: SWISS CHEESE:falls over laughing: Sorry, I found that hilarious for some reason. Hmm. Hadn't thought about it quite that way before. Yeah, I guess all of them let it happen. Bad friends! It should be interesting, shouldn't it?

Gem Gamgee: Man, wow, you reassured me about so many bits that I wasn't sure about. Yay:hands Gem ice cream: Love ya twice!

silverfingers: OK, assuming you ever get to this chapter, a Sakusha is an author and thanks for the compliment. :fears accusations of Mary-Sue-ness: Of course, certain people tell me that all OC's are Mary Sues. Bah.

Trisaksmom: Those are both really good ideas, but the fact is I was worried about both those chapters, and you in particular thinking they were taking too long, and…yeah. I wish I'd done that, but I was kind of hating chapter eight by the time I wrote it. Sigh. OK, one vote definitely for Keeks. Got it.

biggest anime fan: :empty wind tunnel sound: Is everything all right? I hope so.

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Neither of them spoke as Inuyasha carried Kagome back to where they had left the others, but it was a comfortable sort of not-speaking, full of "I'm sorry" and "I care", and both of them were happy with it. When they got back, they found Shippou and Aerie alone, playing what looked like some kind of sticks and stones and pinecones version of tin soldiers. Inuyasha thought he distinctly heard the phrase 'sat him' from Shippou as they approached. Aerie looked so happy to see them arriving together that it made Kagome wonder all over again if the other girl had some secret agenda. Looking at how Aerie got along with Shippou and hearing how sincere her apology sounded, though, she tried to forget it, or at least tune it down to a slight, nagging suspicion, and she pretty much succeeded. Being on the manipulator Naraku's most wanted list, Inuyasha's company, and being the trouble magnet of the millennium had combined to give Kagome a slight case of paranoia, but she had a naturally trusting personality, and didn't like to suspect the worst of anyone. Even someone she wasn't sure she liked.

"Where're the houshi and the taijiya?" Inuyasha demanded, pulling his usual gruff manner together as he set Kagome down. Aerie shrugged from her kneeling position.

"They were here when I left, but not when I got back," she said. "I could hazard a guess what happened, but you'd better ask Shippou."

"Just the usual," he replied, incinerating a swath of Aerie's stickman troops with his foxfire. "He groped her, she slapped him and yelled, they went away in different directions."

"Hey, no fair!" Aerie said. "If you burn mine, I get to burn yours. And don't think I can't…. Yeah, that was about what I thought happened. If they don't get back soon, we'd probably better look for them. What say, Kags? No, Shippou, see, I get to replace mine or I get to burn yours."

"Kags?" repeated Kagome, as Aerie produced a tongue of purple flame and reduced seven stickmen and a pinecone siege engine to cinders, and Shippou cried out in dismay.

"Oh, should I not call you that? I thought it sounded friendly. See, Shippou, are we going to outlaw firethrowing in this war or should I take advantage of my superior aim? You can give me a nickname, if you like, Kagome." Inuyasha could remember his mother doing the exact same thing Aerie was doing when he was small, talking to him while carrying on a conversation with some other adult about another subject entirely. He wondered if it had annoyed the adults as much as it was annoying him. Kagome didn't seem troubled by it, though. Of course, she'd had a little brother.

"I guess it's OK," she said. "Do you think Sango and Miroku are alright?"

"Something bad always happens when everybody goes off in different directions," said Shippou, moving a battalion southeast about eight inches, in perfect position for an ambush. "But they might be alright anyway."

"Maybe me tripping and falling down a hill counts as bad?" Aerie suggested doubtfully.

"No," said Shippou, "I mean something bad." He won the war with his ambush and Aerie's remaining troops surrendered.

"Now you've got me nervous, big guy," she told him, standing. "Let's go look for them."

"Look for who?" asked Sango, stepping out of the brush onto the path.

"You, and Miroku." Aerie told her. "Know where he is?"

"He went the other way," the taijiya replied, sounding worried. "He's not back yet?"

"Probably just meditating or something," Aerie said nervously.

"But he knew we would be starting again as soon as, um, as soon as I got Inuyasha to come back," Kagome pointed out. "He wouldn't take too long."

"Unless he ran into a pretty maid," Sango amended with a scowl.

"Oh, I'm hurt, Sango," said Miroku, coming out of the trees opposite where she had, his golden staff jingling. "Don't you trust me?"

"No," she retorted, and turned her back on him. They set off, Miroku trailing at the back. Shippou, instead of keeping him company as usual, sat on Aerie's shoulder while she taught him 'I Spy.' They walked all day without incident, for which everyone was glad, since it was rapidly approaching twenty hours since they had had any sleep, and they had already had one battle. That evening they made camp, and everyone was too tired even to eat. Inuyasha kept guard. The only thing of note that happened that evening was a particularly loud and angry outburst from Sango at being groped. Apparently he had been more obnoxious about it than usual. He ducked her first few blows, instead of letting her get in a good slap and be done with it, and this led to his thorough pummeling. The next morning, after far too little sleep, everyone was awoken and fed ramen, which Inuyasha had cooked. This had provoked some comment, but he had 'Feh'ed and said that if he'd waited for them to cook it, it would have been an extra half an hour sitting around doing nothing. Sango and Aerie knew, of course, that he was worried about Kagome's not eating. She hadn't eaten since he was kidnapped, and Sango had happened to mention it in his hearing. The rest went without saying. After eating, they moved off again.

"We're going back to Kaede's, right?" Aerie asked Kagome, around noon. Shippou was asleep, sort of slung over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Kagome was walking, had insisted on it since Inuyasha hadn't healed yet.

"Mm. Maybe. Unless Inuyasha is feeling really stubborn. We haven't found a shard yet, except the one we got from Rath-tama, and he's the only one really injured."

"That sounds like him, actually," Aerie admitted. "Do you know where Kaede's village is from here?"

"Me? No."

"Does he?" Both girls looked up at the hanyou, striding along at the head of the column with Sango just behind. Kagome giggled.

"I don't think so."

"Me neither. I don't think he even knows where we are, since he was unconscious all the way to that tower." Kagome blinked. "But I'm sure he'll see a landmark soon, or something," Aerie hastened to add, not wanting to upset the other girl. "He's been all over Japan, right?"

"I think so."

"That's right. Private sort of chap, isn't he?" Then they fell silent for a while. Aerie was thinking longingly of bed, or at least of lying down on the ground and sleeping, which was what bed had meant most of the time for nine months now. "Kags," she said after a while, "Why do you wear that?"

"Huh?" Kagome said, pulled back from a daydream. She paused, processing what her ears had heard. "What thing?"

"The skirt. Why not pants, or at least something longer? Miniskirts are bizarre garments at the best of times, I've always thought, but when you're running around the countryside fighting demons?" She shook her head. "Forget about modesty, it's plain not safe. I'm surprised no one's assumed you're a prostitute yet. Um, no offense meant," she added.

"…er…." Kagome said. "It's…what I wear."

"And I must assume that you don't care whether your underwear shows and you get thorn scratches and poison ivy and gravel afflicting your bare legs?"

"Um."

"I'm sorry. It's none of my business." Aerie shortened her stride, blushing, and fell in beside Miroku. "Tired?" she asked him, since he was staring at the ground, not his usual habit.

"Yes," he agreed. They walked in silence for a moment, and then Aerie remarked nonchalantly,

"There's a chicken crawling out your ear." His head came up and he stared at her, and she grinned.

"Hah. Made you –" she broke off. "Look at me," she finished with barely a heartbeat's pause. Miroku's eyes were yellow. She would swear they were usually purple. She'd checked the colors of everything about the gang very carefully early on, just to see how accurate the animators had been. "Say, do you mind if I leave Shippou with you?" she asked possibly-not-Miroku. "I want to talk to Kags about girl stuff."

"Not a problem at all," he said, smiling, but not looking at her again. The girl took Shippou off her shoulder and began shaking him gently, saying mentally – because she didn't want P.N.M. to hear, although telepathy gave her a headache –

Shippou, wake up. I'm not sure Miroku is actually Miroku. Keep an eye on him, OK? And don't let him know we suspect anything.

I'm on it, General, he told her, adapting readily to this form of communication and hopping out of her arms.

"So Kagome and I will talk girl stuff, and you two can talk guy stuff, huh?" she said aloud.

"If you say so," Shippou agreed. "Hey, Miroku, can you tell me a story?" Aerie sped up again to walk beside Kagome.

"Kags?"

"If it's about my clothes –"

"Forget your clothes. You can dress like a Victoria's Secret model or put on a Harlequin costume and paint your face, if you want, and I won't say a word. Kags, have you noticed anything odd about Miroku today? Don't look at him." Kagome thought. Actually, his queue had seemed kind of odd, his whole head really. If she had seen hair like that in her own time, she would have thought the person had used too much hairspray.

"I did notice that his hair was a little weird," she admitted.

"Trust you to notice hair. And his eyes are yellow."

"They are?"

"Why do you think he hasn't been looking at anyone? I mean, it's possible he's the real Miroku, and something's happened to him, but it could also be an impostor. So what do we do?" Kagome was surprised that Aerie was giving her the lead, and it must have showed, because the younger girl shrugged sheepishly. "Last time I tried to decide what should be done it was a disaster. These are your friends; it's your pack. I'm just a – visitor. Not one of you. You're the boss."

"We wait," said Kagome. "We watch, and try to see if it is Miroku, and if it isn't who it is and why they're pretending to be him."

"Yes, boss."

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Sango's annoyance had worn off midmorning, but she kept up her annoyed stalking. For one thing, it would keep that lech away from her for a while, out of self-preservation, and for another, it left her alone to think. There was something not right about the guy in the black robe. It wasn't just the funny way he had groped her – and it was embarrassing to realize that she was so used to being groped that she could actually notice when it was different – or the way he had ducked, which he never bothered to do, though that was what had tipped her off. It was something just generally wrong about him. He hadn't offered up any of his usual pearls of wisdom or his calming influence all evening or in the morning, and she hadn't felt like forgiving him like she usually did. Perhaps he was sick. Or perhaps it was something more wrong than that.

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Rather a long way from where the tachi was, a redheaded man walked through a shield and up to a castle. He was slightly tattered, but no one who got a proper look at him would mistake him for a beggar. He knocked on the gate to Naraku's domain.

When nothing happened, he knocked again. Then he shrugged and walked through the door, too.

"Would you take me to your lord, or whoever's in charge of this hunk of stone?" he asked the first person he saw with a smile. The man, used to anyone he was required to cooperate with ordering him about and noting the half-shredded condition of the redhead's garment, decided he didn't need to help him.

"Shove off, stranger," he said, turning to walk away.

"I see," said Kileb. He looked after the impolite fellow as if waiting for something, then snapped his fingers. The man exploded.

Kileb had judged the distance perfectly. He was just far enough from the explosion as to remain immaculate, at least as regards pieces of human being. He shook his head. "Rude chap," he remarked to no one in particular. "You," he said, pointing to another person, frozen in horror. "Tell your boss I'd like to see him, would you?"

"Y-yessir," replied the servitor, scuttling off to do as he was told. The castle was no longer very populated. There was significant wastage among those who served Naraku, due to things like Juuromaru and accidental witnessing of their lord cutting the spider off his back. Therefore only two people had been on hand to notice this latest death. One of them had been dispatched to Naraku. The other hurried off to her cubicle in the (now rather empty and echoing) servants quarters. She wasn't stupid. She had figured out before anyone that there was something wrong with the young lord. She had, in fact, started to smuggle other women and the children out shortly after the demon exterminators had been killed. With money to set them up in new lives. The young lord no longer cared about the treasures of the house. It had been easy to steal them. She was glad she had gotten so many of the others free.

Because hadn't she been right? Everyone who remained knew it now. Their lord was youkai, a monster who for some reason felt the need for this castle and their services. Although not much for their services, given how they were dying like flies. No one could escape now, not with the shield up. He'd even picked up the castle and moved it, for crying out loud! They were stuck here until they died, which most of them expected to be quite soon. They were living on borrowed time, and all of them accepted this. Except one woman. The young woman sat on her sleeping mat and tried to figure out what impact this new quantity, the stranger who had killed Rani, could have on her escape plans. Escape obviously meant killing the bogus young lord, which would prove difficult. She had seen that one monster of his kill first Tomwe and Kino, then slice him apart, and he had lain there in pieces and laughed. Killing him meant pulverizing him. Meant getting those people he obsessed about into the castle, so they could handle it, since she had no illusions about her own capabilities as a fighter. She thought the demon-woman Kagura might be a good bet to help. Kagura obviously wanted to be free as much as she did.

She rose and began to climb stairs, slipping in a secret door in the wall of a passage and moving on from there until she came to the room where the demon sat, hardly ever going anywhere, just sitting like a spider in the middle of his web. Great lazy fool. She peered through the peep-hole into the room, and waited.

Her name was Yanagi, named for the willow that bends but will not break.

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Naraku sent the messenger back to fetch this visitor, and he conducted him in and then fled, relieved to have accomplished this job without dying. Kileb sat down facing the shadowed form of Naraku, smiling as usual.

"Hello," he said, "I'm afraid I blew up one of your servants, hope you don't mind."

"Who are you?" Naraku asked.

"I've been called a lot of things. I suppose Kileb will do now."

"What do you want?"

"To offer you some assistance with a certain problem concerning a hanyou and his pack."

"Indeed?" replied Naraku, sounding mildly interested. "And why might you wish to do that?"

"That is my business, really. Suffice it to say that someone I strongly dislike is travelling with them. Someone who is presently going to give you trouble."

"The new girl?"

"She's powerful."

"What do you have to offer?"

Kileb explained. When he was done, Naraku considered in silence for a time. Quite apart from the advantages of having this man to help, he somehow felt that it would be…unwise…to have him as a foe. The melded youkai nodded. "Very well, then," he said. "We shall work together."

"Allies," said Kileb, nodding. And, without thinking, he offered the other his hand to shake. Naraku regarded it for a moment, then looked up and regarded Kileb dryly. And Kileb, master of mysteries, bane, terror of twelve worlds and conqueror of two, blushed at the realization that they didn't shake hands around here.

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They made camp, as the sky was getting dim, and Miroku took so long over the fire that Aerie pushed him aside and built it herself. Once it was burning merrily and they were settled, Sango said,

"I'm for a bath. Girls, you want to come?"

"Stream?" Aerie asked. "Or random hot spring?"

"Spring," Sango replied. "We passed one not too far back."

"Wow," said Aerie enthusiastically, "I haven't had a hot bath since the Seventh Crow Inn, and that was three weeks ago." She glanced at Inuyasha. "Hey, when was the last time you had any kind of bath?" she asked him.

"You're not asking him along!" Sango exclaimed. Aerie laughed.

"No! I'm just curious. Baths don't seem high on his priority list, and right now he's looking pretty scruffy and I can smell him from here. Maybe he should take a bath when we're done."

"Feh," said Inuyasha. "Maybe."

"Come on," said Kagome, who had gotten her bathing things. "Let's go. I've got blood on me still, from Inuyasha and that battle." The three girls and Shippou went off together, Aerie commenting,

"How do you get the stains out of your uniform so often, Kags? I mean, surely you could wear something else so you don't have to go to school in a bloodstained uniform…."

Inuyasha and 'Miroku' were left in the camp together, Inuyasha lying beside the fire with his hands behind his head and the false houshi prodding it uncertainly. Inuyasha after a few seconds said,

"Did you break a container of ink, monk?"

"Eh?" said the black-robed man.

"You smell of ink. You've always smelled of ink, since I met you, but right now you smell so strongly of it I can't smell anything else on you at all."

"Er, yes, an ink container cracked last night. Got all over me."

"Mm-hm." Inuyasha replied noncommittally. 'Miroku' got up nervously.

"Well, I'd better, er…."

"Going to spy on the girls again, huh? You know what, I'm bored stopping you. Go ahead." A look of relief crossed the fake Miroku's face, but Inuyasha didn't see it, since he was facing the other way.

"Indeed." He said, and vanished through the trees after the girls.

"They'll catch him anyway," Inuyasha told the sky, and smiled slightly.

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At the spring, Sango and Shippou had slid right in as soon as they were undressed, Kagome had carefully folded her clothes and was now choosing which soap to use, and Aerie was regarding the hot spring with a touch of bemusement.

"This is ridiculous, you know." She remarked.

"What is?" Shippou asked.

"The number of hot springs you guys manage to find. They're everywhere. I mean, sure Japan is in the Ring of Fire, but still..."

"The what?" Sango asked, confused. "What fire?"

"Oh, nothing. Big ring of tectonic activity around the Western Pacific." Sango shrugged; she was used to girls from the future and incomprehensible comments.

"Come on in," was all she said. Aerie jumped in with a slight splash and began rubbing energetically.

"Ooh, man, I'm filthy," she muttered, "Mom would freak." But Irene was worlds away and still presumed her dead, which was a bone of contention between Aerie and the others. Trisak won't explain to them, she thought. It's not fair to leave them grieving. For crying out loud, they're not going to lose it just because a guy with wings turns up explaining that their daughter is about sixty dimensions away. She smiled. Might think they've lost it for a while, but they'd get used to it.

She was distracted by Kagome, having finally chosen her soap and shampoo, climbed into the spring with them in one hand. "Hang on," she said. "Kagome, you're going to use…soap? In this spring? And you use it in streams and things too?"

"Yes," said Kagome. "I like to be clean." Aerie sighed.

"City girl. No doubt about it. I have a word for you, Kagome: Pollution. We don't have to deal with it here. Humans haven't gotten to the point where they blight everything they touch yet. And we are both so lucky to be here. It is not responsible of you to use soap in a water source! Things live in water. Things need water. Sure, you're not going to kill off any species washing your hair, but still. Come on. Soap yourself up out of the water, and then I'll pour water over you. Then at least it'll just be dirt you're soaping."

"O-okay…" said Kagome, taken aback by the fervor with which Aerie defended the spring. She ducked under the water and then climbed out and began to soap herself up. Aerie wrapped herself in one of the towels Kagome had so kindly brought along, ran back to camp to fetch something to rinse Kagome with, startled the living daylights out of Inuyasha, and ran back to the spring with a large metal bowl in one hand. When she got there Kagome was covered in soap and had her hair piled on her head, sudsy with shampoo, and was shivering a little in the cold. Aerie filled the bowl with water and emptied it over Kagome's head, then went back for another load, crying,

"Don't open your eyes, Kags!" After she had emptied that one, she turned back for one more bowl of water and then paused, staring up into the canopy of the trees. "Hey!" she shouted, and threw the bowl.

It met skull with a clang, and small branches cracked as the black-robed figure fell toward the water, to Sango's cry of,

"In a tree?" He hit the water with a splash, almost squashing Shippou, and stood up unsteadily, not quite unconscious, water pouring down his face in black runnels. Sango saw to the not-quite-unconscious part, pounding him even more thoroughly than she had the previous evening. When he was completely out, she picked him up by the scruff of the neck and dragged him onto the bank, scowling. "You two," she said, "Finish your bath. I'll deal with this hentai."

"His hair is going white," Aerie observed. "Look." Sango looked.

"Hm," she agreed. She dumped the peeping tom on the ground and dried herself off furiously, getting dressed. Once she had her uniform back on, she took him off into the woods, carrying him over her shoulder. When she was gone, Aerie let out a breath that she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

"Wow. I haven't seen anyone that angry since Reg found the guy who'd killed his father. I hope she doesn't kill him."

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He woke up groggily, and stood. He was in woods. Hadn't he been…in a spring…? He gave a strangled shout as someone pounced from behind him and grabbed him.

"Alright," she muttered in his ear, keeping him in a headlock, "Who are you, and what have you done with Miroku?"

"I'm Shayanui," he said, his voice somewhat muffled by the way she had his jaw locked shut, "And I stashed him in a hollow tree."

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So, whadya think? I hope the length of this chappy makes up for the wait. So what's with Inuyasha? Is he just an idiot, or what, given that he appears to be the only one not suspicious? Oh, I hope nobody minds that Shippou was there for that whole bathing scene. He's a little kid, you know? He's gone bathing with them before. I couldn't have him stay at the camp, because that would mess up the little discussion between Shayanui and Inuyasha. What do you think of Yanagi? She just wrote herself, I couldn't seem to stop it if I wished to. I've always been rather interested in those constantly dying and pitifully yanked about occupants of that castle.

Shayanui: How did I get here? Wasn't I just being strangled?

Trisak: You're in an author's note. Now you get to yell at me for what I've been doing to you for the last chapter.

Shayanui: Really, to tell you the truth, after having Melanie as my Sakusha this is nothing.

Trisak: Really? Cooool. One of you doesn't hate me! And it's the one I've just had beaten practically to a pulp twice in a row! I love living in this universe. Nothing ever makes sense.

Shayanui: And besides, you let me see naked girls.

Sango: That's right, that was your fault:raises Hiraikotsu: Trisak Aminawn, you are going down.

Trisak: Whoa! Calm down! Sango, you wouldn't hurt me, would you:backs into corner: Come on, I only did what you wanted! You're getting page time! Lots of it! And you're not unconscious! Come on, put Hiraikotsu down, don't make me turn you into a chicken, because that would screw up the storyline rather a lot….

Shippou: Sango a chicken? Trisak, please don't do that! Foxes eat chickens!

Trisak: Oh, all right, Shippou, but only because you're so cute. What do you want from me, Sango?

Sango: I want a decent fight. In which I don't get quickly knocked out and have to be rescued.

Trisak: Ok, taijiya, you got it, but remember it's thanks to Shi- O.O :slaps Shayanui: HENTAI!