"Bwahahahahaha!"

"Ahahahahahaha!"

"Muwahahahaha!"

"Hahahahahahaha!"

Carrie groaned, "Won't those two ever shut up?" Sleepy agreements were murmured throughout the chorus singers' dormitory.

"Are they doing this to punish us? Or, are they both too stubborn to stop unless the other stops first?" Neshomeh asked.

"I bet it is both," came a response from somewhere in the dark room. This was day (well night) three of the great Maniacal Laugh War of OPA. The laughing had been going on almost that entire time. Certain not-so-minis (mainly Bucquet and Bouquet) were becoming so traumatized by the constant laughter that Mlle. Mirielle had to take them off the active duty roster.

"Ahahahahahaha!"

The room groaned collectively. "Isn't the staff bothered by the laughing as well? I mean it has to keep them up at night," Kaydence's voice was muffled, as she had her pillow held tight over her head.

Eve spoke up, "I overheard The Persian saying something to M. Poligny about the staff section being made sound proof. So I guess it doesn't bother them."

"Muwahahahaha!"

Jacqueline sat up in bed and looked around. "Hey, has anyone seen Victoria? She left to use the bathroom a long time ago."

Bwahahahahaha!"

"Hahahah-" The laughter cut off, and then there was blissful silence. After a minute or two, a voice then cried out,

"Yes! I win"

"No, you don't! I just had to Punjab a luster (Jacqueline was then heard saying "Never mind"). It is a legitimate reason to break off in mid-laugh."

"There are no rules in the great Maniacal Laugh War of OPA. I have won!"

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did."

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

The dormitory collectively groaned again. The laughing had stopped, but now they had to listen to two geniuses argue like they were four.

Despite the extreme lack to sleep the night before, the students were actually quite animated during breakfast. This was due to the announcement that the Eriks were actually going to show up and teach their class, Write Me In Character or I will Punjab You. The sessions for this class had either been previously cancelled, or they had guest speakers.

As the students filed into the classroom, Eve noticed that other staff members were there as well. She saw both of the Christines and both of the Raouls (who were probably just there because the Christines were.) The Persian, the Leroux!managers, and M. Reyer were also there. Mlle. Alaina and Mlle. Mirielle stood near the back. Eve guessed that the Eriks actually teaching a class was such an event that everyone wanted to see it.

The Eriks came stalking in glaring at each other. But when they reached the front of the room, they switched their glares to the students. Webber!Erik was the first to address the group. "Today, we are going to discuss those stories that insist on pairing us up with a woman other than Christine."

Leroux!Erik scoffed, "It would never happen." Eve saw the Christines smile slightly at this.

Webber!Erik sent him a glare and said, "We agreed we would approach this in a rational manner. So, no comments from the peanut gallery." Leroux!Erik just glared back at him. Webber!Erik turned back to the class. "Now we are not saying that it is impossible for us to fall in love with another woman, but-"

"What?" Both Christines had stood up, and their eyes were filling with tears and their lips quivering. Leroux!Christine said, "But, Erik…" at the same time Webber!Christine said, "Angel…" They both then ran out of the classrooms with the Raouls following closely behind. Eve noticed that the Raouls had exchanged a high-five, and she could have sworn she saw Leroux!Raoul stick his tongue out at the Eriks. The Eriks both made a move to go after the Christines, but Mlle. Alaina cleared her throat from the back of the room.

"You two agreed that you would teach this class today. So finish the lesson and then you may chase after your respective ingénues."

Leroux!Erik stalked up in front of Webber!Erik and spoke. "But there are some other women characters that we can rule out. The first among these is Christine and Raoul's daughter. While we might take an interest in her because she is Christine's daughter, it would be strictly platonic. Why? Well, the most important reason is age. It is generally agreed that I am about fifty during the book. By the time Christine's daughter is old enough for me to even think about romantically, I would be about seventy."

Several students started shifting around, obviously having a mental picture of a twenty year old kissing a seventy year old. It was not a pretty thought.

Leroux!Erik jerked his thumb towards Webber!Erik. "Even Mr. Half-Mask, here, has to deal with the age thing. He is generally seen not as old as I, but he is probably in his mid-forties. This would put him in his sixties." He then surveyed the class and surmised, "Judging by the looks on your face, I see we have explained that one fairly well."

"As we are dealing with relations of Christine, we feel we should also mention 'the sister.' Christine does not have a sister. But even if she did, we would not fall in love with her just because she is Christine's sister. Even if you make her more beautiful and have a better voice than Christine." Webber!Erik said, taking over for Leroux!Erik. He then mumbled something that sounded like "not possible."

Leroux!Erik continued the speech with, "We taught Christine to sing! No one can sing better than her. No one, because we DID NOT TEACH THEM!" Erik roared, and then more calmly continued, "And just because a woman is scarred or disfigured, it does not mean we will automatically fall in love with them. In fact, it is really hard to write a believable other woman character for us. So, why don't you all stick with pairing us up with Christine?"

"Hey! OPA does not endorse any relationships." Mlle. Mirielle yelled from the back. The two Eriks looked at each other and exchanged a grin (which was scary in itself).

"Well, OPA may not, but we do. Now may we please leave?" asked Webber!Erik. Mlle. Alaina looked like she was about to refuse, but then she just sighed.

"It's your opera house. Just don't kill the Raouls. We need them." With that, the Eriks raced out of the room searching the Christines and their unfortunate suitors.

A.N: Insert generic author's notes here.