Crack pairing generators rock! I own nothing, stop asking.

----

"I've got a dare for you, Riku."

Repliku looked up from his star-shaped trinket, aquamarine eyes narrowed as they fixed upon the Lord of the Underworld. With this man in charge, it was no wonder no one wanted to die... Or maybe it was the horribly decorated cave that all the dead were supposed to live in.

There were cobwebs in his false silver hair, and his clothes made from darkness had been replaced by a long, dark black cloak... This man had /no/ taste in clothing after all... And the worst part?

Repliku had no shoes. The grounds of the underworld were rocky... And Repliku was forced to walk over them, barefoot, wearing horrible clothes, and being stared at by the morons that dwelt here.

"What is it?" He finally grumbled, folding his arms in an almost irritated gesture... But he was as good as a Nobody when it came to emotions.

A smirk crossed the blue skinned deity's face, and he pointed one gnarled finger at the one living person who did reside in the underworld. "See blondie there?" He almost laughed, pointed yellow teeth flashing in what could have been a smile. "Well, he's got two swords on him... See if you can find them, alright?"

A silver brow arched, and he turned to give Hades an 'You've got to be kidding' look. "And why should I do that?"

But Hades' was prepared for this question, and he responded just as quickly. "I'll tell you what you want to know, kid."

And thus, Repliku was soon standing in front of a glaring blonde, entranced by those twin pools of glowing mako-blue. Smooth, rosy lips were drawn in a tight line, and a gloved hand rested upon the hilt of a massive sword that rested on his back.

'There's one.' The clone thought, breaking away from that piercing gaze to look for the other one.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Cloud Strife asked with growing agitation, not liking the fact that the boy was looking him up and down as if he was a piece of meat.

"Nope." The teen responded, pausing when an idea struck him. "Say, Spiky-"

"It's Cloud." The man corrected, coldly at that.

"-Anyways, Spiky. How many metal swords do you have on you?"

An eyebrow arched. "One... Why?"

Ah-hah! The clone grinned, suddenly leaning forward and dragging Cloud's face towards his own, lips meeting in a kiss which soon turned into a sharp cry as Repliku's pale hand snaked between the blonde's legs and squeezed.

...Later...

Hades chuckled, giving Repliku the once over. The imprint of Cloud's metal hand slapping the boy's cheek was still a nasty red-purple color... Ah well, he hadn't expected the boy to go /that/ far. It was Cloud Strife after all.

"Tell me." The silver haired boy snapped, cutting the God of the Underworld's train of thought off.

"Ah, fine. Are you sure you want to know?" He teased, laughing as Repliku bristled and growled. "Fine, fine. Cloud has never, ever willingly kissed Sephiroth."

"...Seriously?"

"Yup. But maybe he was just using you to pretend you were Sephiroth.."

Later, Back In Radiant Garden...

A very exhausted blonde ran his fingers through his tousled locks, bleary blue eyes staring at the flashing numbers on the alarm clock, groaning slightly as he felt the pale arms that were wrapped around his waist tighten slightly.

"Legoo.." The sleepy response came, but the silver haired being holding him only shook his head and pulled him closer."Nnngh..."

"No, my Cloud." Turquoise eyes flickering in amusement as the blonde stopped struggling and allowed himself to be pulled into the warm embrace. "What's out there that's not in here?"

"...Something soft to sit on?"

"Hah, you're so funny Cloud."

"... Shut up, Riku."