Hello! I'm soooooo sorry for the time this one took. But hey! It's finally here, right? Thanks all for the patience and the reviews! Guest, I'm sorry it is going that way for now, but I promise it is an S&J fic, a little (more) patience, and it will be there. :) And who knows, maybe I manage to make the fluffiest of the fluffs for them soon. :D

Enjoy!

M.

Chapter L

May 6th, 2005

Carter's home.

"So, why am I here?" Ashley asked, looking around as Sam kept coming and going placing different things into a box.

"I need transport," Sam announced with a wide grin.

"One astounding abnormal skill and you become a taxi," Ashley grimaced, dropping herself onto the couch dramatically. Sam stopped dead in her tracks and looked at her half-sister in distress.

"I'm sorry, Ashley, I didn't know it bothered you. I never asked." Appalled by the fact she had never stopped to consider Ashley's feelings on being used as a transport, Sam chewed her lower lip, feeling a bit guilty. Looking utterly shocked and not knowing what to do, she got hit by one of the pillows that rested on her couch. "Hey!"

"I'm not bothered, it was a joke, sis! Geez, you need to stop being such a worrywart," Ashley said, looking at the levels of distress her wisecrack had created on Sam.

"I'm not a worrywart," Sam frowned.

"Yes, you are. Not always, but you are. You can't avoid it, sis. It's genetics: Mom's side," Ashley winked. "So, what's all that?"

"Memories," Sam smiled.

"Cool!" Ashley jumped closer in curiosity. "Can I see it? Why are you packing them?"

"I want to share my memories with you, mom, and Tesla," Sam said, and a lovely shade of crimson covered her face and neck, but she stubbornly kept her eyes on Ashley.

"They will love that! I know I will! Let me know when everything is ready. I can't wait to see what you'll show us!" She almost squealed with happiness.

"So, you think it's a good idea?" Sam worried.

"Yeah, of course! You are my sister, and I want to get to know you. It's way easier when you share willingly than if I try to google you," Ashley grinned and winked. Sam nodded once more, still feeling a bit self-conscious. "They are your parents, Sam; I have a slight idea of what it feels like when you miss out on some years of your family life. I can't begin to imagine what it must be like for them. I saw mom mourn you every single year, carrying the weight all by herself and not telling a soul about it."

"And my father?"

"I don't know. I had no idea mom was mourning you until the months before my 'abduction,' but I knew Nikola Tesla was alive and a vampire. Still, that was a name only Uncle James would bring up."

"Mom explained to me that she tried to find Tesla to ask if he was okay with bringing me to term, but she couldn't reach him," Sam told her.

"Yeah, Nikola appeared out of the blue one day asking what she wanted to talk about. By then, you were long gone, months had passed since my dad kidnapped you! Mom was so mad at him for showing up a year and a half too late. I know something went wrong when Nikola found out, and then, he disappeared until a couple of years ago. Maybe you should ask him?"

"I did, he didn't say much."

"Oh well, if they didn't tell you straight away, chances are you might never know," Ashley shrugged. "Is that everything?" she asked, eyeing the box.

"Yeah," Sam nodded, still somewhat lost in thought, "let me check everything is secured, and we can go." Then, she strolled around her house, making sure she had everything closed. "I'm ready."

"Cool, just grab your box tight," Ashley said, and they disappeared from Sam´s house. "And, the Sanctuary Express has arrived," she grinned as they teleported inside Helen's office."

"Girls," Helen welcomed them with a bright smile as she raised her eyes from the screen. "What's all that, Samantha?"

"Mementos? I, hmm, I want to share some of my memories with you guys?" Sam grimaced and blushed at the same time.

"Really? That's," Magnus bit her lower lip out of emotion, then grinned, "wonderful, darling. By all means, let's not wait."

"I was wondering if Nikola could join us?" Sam asked.

"Of course, he will love it," Helen said, feeling oddly proud. "Let me call him. He must be in his lab," she was about to pick up her radio when she noticed Ashley disappearing from the room.

"What's going up?" Nikola asked, noticing he was at Helen's office being watched by the trio. He patted his clothes as he waited for some explanation as to why was he summoned so brusquely to the 'principal's office.'

"Sorry," Ashley grinned apologetically. "Sam's been going around her house for an hour before I brought her here, and I'm getting impatient."

"No shit, Sherlock," Sam giggled.

"Samantha, vocabulary," Helen rolled her eyes.

"And?" Nikola frowned.

"Samantha wants to share her memories with us," Helen commented.

"Yeah, I found some albums and my brother," Sam frowned. "Jacob's son."

"Your brother, Mark," Nikola grinned. "What did he do?"

"He called me out of the blue, a week or so ago, and told me he found something he would like me to have. Mark said it had been sitting in his attic for forever now."

"What did he find?" Nikola asked, confused.

"A couple of tapes with recordings related to me, he said. I've never seen them."

"So, we get a chance to see little Samantha!" Ashley grinned. "That's so cool, finally one embarrassing video that isn't about me! Follow me. I'm going to set the movie room for us."

"Well, not so little, my family didn't have a camcorder until the '80s. I was already way past being a child back then."

"Oh, that makes it way more interesting, teenager Samantha," Ashley grinned.

"Let us start by embarrassing pictures," Sam blushed, taking a photo album out of the box. They settled as comfortably as they could around her. Nikola and Helen sat beside her on the couch while Ashley lingered standing behind them. And then, she opened it.

"Aww, look at you, how cute you were!" Nikola said, looking at the typical photograph of a baby lying in a baby tub.

"I remember you were utterly adorable," Helen grinned sadly.

They slowly turned pages, taking in all the details of Sam growing up, until the album finished abruptly after one picture of Sam starting a new year at school.

"Ah, my mom died soon after this one," Sam said. "There weren't many pictures taken after that. There's my high school yearbook and the academy yearbook," she shrugged. Helen felt her heart break a little with that comment and taking a quick look at Nikola, and she knew he was feeling the same too.

"There were videos, though," Ashley grinned, trying to ease up the sadness that threatened to overcome the previous gleeful energy. "There's something I find odd, why aren't there any birthday pictures?" Ashley asked, and Sam blanched.

"You don't have to answer that if you don't feel comfortable, Samantha," Helen told her reassuringly.

"I know, mom," she took a deep breath. "Jacob explained to me that at first, it was because it was too close to their own daughter's death. And later, they told me that it was a few days after Christmas and too close to New Year's Eve, so with all the parties and presents, there was no need for another one," she shrugged. Nikola and Helen exchanged a glance that went unnoticed by the girls.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Ashley said. "Not that I got any big party or something, but mom always made sure I felt special on that day, right mom?"

"I suppose, I always tried to take some time away from work to do something together, as we did for your last birthdays," Helen explained.

"I enjoyed that birthday, mom. I think it was the first time in a very long time that I felt special on that day," Sam said, remembering their little trip to Smiljan and London.

"Do you want to watch those videos now, or would you rather stop here, Samantha?" Helen asked, noticing Sam seemed a little down.

"Let's watch them. I have no idea what's on those tapes. Mark only said they should be mine because they were about me."

They moved to the movie room, and Ashley sat right next to the VCR. They still had to operate it in close range. Each tape contained just a short clip, but as they changed them, Sam's eyes filled with tears.

There were videos of situations she never knew were filmed.

One contained a recording of her thirteen-ish self, where she was receiving an award for her science fair project. Sam remembered that day, remembered feeling devastated too.

Sam clenched her jaw to fight the emotions that were threatening to overpower her. While growing up, the only person who had cared about her passions was Debra Carter, her mommy. Debra helped her even if she didn't understand what Sam was doing.

Sam remembered the day they were seeing. It was barely a year after her mom's passing. She had found herself needing Debra more than ever as she walked to the stage to take her award. Her mom was not there; she never would be there anymore. There was no one cheering for her; there was no familiar face in the crowd. No one she could look for reassurance. Thus, she had always believed her dad didn't care about her anymore, that he had gotten so lost in his grieving that his children were nothing more but a painful reminder of the woman he had loved. Now, she knew even if he wasn't there, Jacob had cared enough to ask someone to record it and wondered if he had done the same for Mark too.

Seeing the look of distress and awe her daughter was sporting, Helen put her arm around Sam's shoulders and pressed a kiss to her hair. Feeling raw, Sam cuddled closer. In front of the tv, Ashley changed tapes.

"Here she comes, Jacob," another voice Sam didn't know, announced as they all watched Sam walk to a podium, her clothes and the class sign giving away the fact that it was her school graduation. Soon, they were listening to her as she gave her valedictorian speech.

"I leave you with this. I heard a saying, way, way back when I was starting my long school career. A saying that shaped me, in the most unexpected way. From the hallowed halls of academia, I give you this: I wish I were a glow worm, A glow worm's never glum, for how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out your bum.' (*)

"Cheeky," Helen grinned as Ashley outright laughed. Nikola shook his head, trying to contain his merriment. To make their laughs worse, Sam blushed fiercely.

"She is so your daughter," he laughed. This time, when Helen joined Nikola's and Ashley's laugh, Sam laughed too.

Once they were able to control themselves, Ashley changed the tapes again. The recordings weren't dated, so they showed Sam at different ages getting awards and giving equally cheeky short speeches. When Ashley finally pushed the last one in, there was another stage, this time with the Air Force Flag, and Sam was called to give her speech.

"I'm so proud of you, Sammie," Jacob Carter's voice came from the video, shocking Sam to the core. "Your mom would be even prouder."

The video ended the moment her speech finished, and Sam could only imagine her dad scurrying away from the crowd because by then, they were not talking at all, and he couldn't possibly have been there when she had not seen him.

"Samantha," Helen said later that night when they were finally alone.

"Yes?"

Helen remembered the expressions of the people in the room when they were watching Sam's life. Ashley looked inspired, and in awe, as young Sam tackled prizes and stages with ease, she didn't possess.

Nikola, her oldest friend, the father of her daughter, had a proud smile that he couldn't erase, and an expression of pure love Helen hadn't seen in a long while.

And then, Sam. Samantha had a bittersweet expression. It seemed as if she was heartbroken and half grateful as if somehow, some missing pieces were finally coming together. To make it better, she had allowed Helen to help her feel safe as she confronted whatever she was facing at the time.

"I'm not sure how to word this," Helen frowned, feeling oddly at lost for words.

"That's a first," Sam grinned.

"Indeed," Helen agreed quickly. "When we were watching those tapes, it seemed to me you realized something, can I ask what that was?"

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "I mentioned how my family ended up almost coming apart after my mom's passing, right?" Helen nodded. "Well, I always thought my dad didn't care anymore, and these tapes..."

"They show he did."

"Yes, he never mentioned them. Not even when I shouted at him for being a lousy father and abandoning his children."

"Then, you are lucky he is still alive, Samantha. Sometimes, parents make stupid mistakes too. Those rarely mean we don't love our children."

"I guess I'll talk to him whenever he comes to visit."

"Bring him down too. I wouldn't mind a chat with him. I'm sure both Jacob and Selmak have plenty of stories to share."

"Will do," Sam nodded. She yawned, "I guess I should go to bed." Helen checked her watch.

"We both should. Thank you for tonight, Samantha, you have no idea what it meant for us." Sam saw the feelings flooding her mother's eyes and unable to utter a word she only nodded once. Helen smiled, opening her arms, and without a doubt, Sam took the chance of being held by maternal arms as she certainly still needed.

May 7th, 2005

SGC

It was her day off, supposedly his too.

He saw his phone lights turn on before it started ringing, and he apologized to the several officers as he checked the caller. He frowned.

"Excuse me, I need to take this," Jack said, and the officers stood up as he left the briefing room and walked towards the privacy of his office.

She was about to hang up and mark the task as 'attempted but failed' when the worried "O'Neill" reached her ears, made her shiver, and left her wanting to hear more.

"Carter? What's going on?" Jack asked when she didn't answer. 'Maybe it's a purse call or something,' he thought, but then again, it was Sam, and she was the only person he knew who could avoid that sort of thing from happening.

"Sir," Sam managed to say.

"Everything alright, Carter? You are kinda worrying me here," he said, and Sam knew it was the truth.

"Nothing wrong, sir. I just wanted to know if I could meet you somewhere?"

"I'm at the base now, Carter," he sighed. She cringed. "And I think I ordered you to stay the hell away from the base during this weekend."

"Yes, sir."

"I'm joking, Carter. If you need to see me, by all means, come and see me. Listen, I was in the middle of something here, which is why I am here in the first place. I should be finished in an hour, come by then?"

"Okay. Thank you, sir," Sam said before she hung up the call. Jack rubbed his face, feeling more tired than he was before only from hearing the mild distress in her voice. Jack shook himself out of it. There had been yet another attempt to bring the SGC down that morning, and he wasn't going to let it happen. Or let anyone under his command know about it.

"Everything okay, General?" Samuels asked, a grin on his face, and God, Jack had always harbored a desire to erase his smug grin with his fist.

"Nothing to worry about. Please continue to bore me with all this information about why capable people, who have been keeping this planet safe for eight years, are suddenly incapable of doing it."

Hammond had briefed him on the situation. He was aware that it was just another political plot to try and gain more access, power, and perhaps even a position at the office. George warned Jack to behave because everything was solved, but he needed time to finalize things. Forty minutes later, they had finally left the building, and Jack couldn't be happier about it.

"Come in," he said loud enough to whoever had knocked on his door and hoped it was Harriman with some coffee, as he was starting to feel the weight of the day.

"Sir?" Sam asked, noticing he was hunched over his desk, pressing the bridge of his nose.

"Carter!" He jumped up when he heard her. The last thing he wanted to do was to add some more worry to whatever was already disturbing her. "Come in, Carter. Why did you need to see me on your day off?"

"Sir, it is a personal matter?" She cringed when her mother's voice asking her why she had answered Pete's question in a work environment that suddenly filled her mind.

"Well, good thing I was here only for a dumb meeting, and I was about to check myself out," he grinned. "We can go somewhere else if that will make you feel more comfortable, Carter," Jack offered, noticing she was utterly uncomfortable.

"No! I mean, no, sir. Here is okay," she whispered.

"Carter, it's just me," Jack whispered back, looking at her in a way that made her feel safe, protected, and loved. Sam flinched. She was engaged now, and she shouldn't be harboring feelings for him. She shouldn't be comparing how a look from this man could make her feel more than a passionate kiss from her fiancé.

"My CO…," she sighed.

"You and I; Sam and Jack, no one else," he stated with a half-smile. She looked at him and got lost in his eyes until she remembered why she was there to start with; then a blush covered her face, and she looked down, embarrassed.

'Jack,' Sam savored his name in her mind before she decided she couldn't tell her news to him, not when he was Jack, and she was Sam.

Jack knew something was off, way off when she shied her eyes away from his. She had never been embarrassed to lock gazes with him.

"Sir," she started again, leveling her eyes and squaring her shoulders. She was a decorated military officer, a tough as nails fighter with vampire blood! For cryin' out loud! She could do it. Sam pep talked herself mentally but fixed her eyes on the bookcase behind him. Sam knew if she allowed herself to get lost in the deepness of his brown eyes again, she wouldn't be able to say what she came to say. "I'm engaged," she blurted.

Jack blanched. He had heard before that there were words that felt like punches and glares that felt like knives. Jack had experienced it when she had asked him to keep it in the room all those years ago. However, then, there was still hope, she was still single, and so was he. Then, there was the Air Force, the Goa'uld, and the replicators in between them.

Now that he, or actually her mom, had managed to find a way to bend the rules for them. He felt the words weren't just punching the air out of him; they were straight-up killing him.

She, his Sam, was engaged and he couldn't compete with that! Not now, what an ass would he be if he said, 'don't get married to that shrub, wait for me instead, I promise it won't take that much longer?'

Jack fought the urge to stand up and kiss her senseless, making her forget all her ideas about that guy. He wanted to scream in pain and cry as he hadn't wanted to cry in a long time. However, he only allowed her to see the emotions flickering through his mind reflected in his face for a split second before he donned his special ops mask and nodded once.

"Please say something?" Sam whispered, her own heart breaking, and she wasn't sure why she had done this to him and to herself.

"Congratulations, Carter," he said a bit too bitterly, and she flinched.

"Only that?" She asked and bit her cheeks when she received a glare from him.

Jack had thousands of things he wanted to tell her, and he was trying hard to sort them out. However, there was something that made him stop; he eyed the red phone and his promise of letting her be who she was weighted heavily on his mind.

"What else do you want me to say, Carter?" he said softly.

'That you love me? That I shouldn't marry Pete? That I am making a big mistake?' She thought but said nothing. He saw something flicker in her eyes, and it made him sigh. He was making her feel pain, and he hated it.

"Look, Carter. I'm happy if you are," he managed to say, and Sam growled, actually growled in frustration hearing those words from him.

"Really? That's …" 'all?' She wanted to say but trailed off when Daniel knocked on the window of Jack's office, seeing it was 'only them' there. Jack looked at Sam then quickly at Daniel, finding out that Teal'c was also there. To Sam's utter disbelief, Jack nodded them in.

"Hey, so the secret meeting is finally over? Hey, Sam, didn't Jack order you out of the base for the weekend?"

"Daniel, Teal'c," Sam greeted, trying to compose herself but failing miserably.

"Ah, Sam here was telling me her news," Jack explained, thinking he was the last one to know, as he figured he would be.

"What news?" Daniel asked, and Jack turned to watch her.

"You didn't tell them yet?" Jack asked, confused. She shook her head. "Well, I guess the cat is out of the bag anyway," he shrugged, and Sam sighed.

"A couple of days ago," she flinched, realizing it was already almost two weeks ago, "I got engaged."

"What?" Daniel asked, utterly surprised by the news. Teal'c remained as impassive as usual but nodded.

"Then allow me to congratulate you on your engagement, Colonel Carter," Teal'c said.

If Teal'c disliked the idea, he didn't show it. Daniel wanted to be a little more like him or like Jack, who was wearing an undecipherable mask. However, Daniel knew his own expression was showing exactly how he felt, and he couldn't do anything to hide it.

"Thank you. We haven't marked a date or anything yet," Sam said.

Daniel walked past her and flopped on the seat next to her. Once he was sure he wasn't going to say anything stupid, he raised his eyes towards Jack. If looks could kill, Daniel would be dead again. 'Show some support,' he understood it, bright and clear, but how could he show support if he knew exactly how this was killing Jack, and something in Sam's demeanor told him it was also killing her. He wanted to point all this out to her. But the looks on both Jack and Teal'c, as they waited for him to say something, said otherwise.

Unable to look at her, he placed his hand on her thigh, gave it a light squeeze, and let out the words she didn't want to hear anymore. "I'm happy for you, Sam. I'm happy if you are."

Then, in an uncharacteristic move, she stood up brusquely and throwing a sad 'I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, sir,' to Jack, she rushed out of his office, desperate to get some fresh air.

"Well, that was," Jack huffed and didn't finish his sentence. Daniel and Teal'c exchanged a glance.

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed.

"I think I need a beer," Daniel said, leaning back in his chair. Jack laughed, surprising them both.

"Oh, Danny-boy, if only beer could fix this," Jack said cryptically. "Uhm, guys, if you excuse me, I would like to go home while we still can." He said, standing up. They nodded, and they all left his office.

May 9th, 2005

SGC

It took him two days to come to terms with Sam's latest revelation. He was avoiding Will because that man would figure out with just a look that it was a huge lie. But it took him two days, nonetheless, to even consider the talk he would have to have with Helen Magnus.

To make it worse, he knew she knew, probably since day one, and the Doc hadn't called him. So, he wasn't sure if he was feeling betrayed only by her daughter or if the fact that Doctor Magnus hadn't said a word meant she too betrayed him.

They had plans for him to marry Sam, for crying out loud! Doctor Magnus herself had pushed those plans onto his lap. She had it all almost organized, and he foolishly believed that for once, life would work out for him. He shook his head.

Jack knew himself enough to know he wouldn't be sure of where he stood until he faced it; locking his computer, Jack pushed his chair away from the desk and stood up.

"Walter!" He called, and the man hurried towards him. "I'm stepping away for a while. If someone needs me, tell them to come back later," he almost barked, before he shook himself. "Sorry, Walter, I'm not mad at you."

"I know, sir," Walter nodded. "You are busy; they shouldn't call you at your cell."

"You know it," Jack added before he walked away from his office.

He had a VIP room. However, he still got changed every day inside the locker room as any other officer would. Jack considered heading out while still wearing his BDUs if only to avoid people, then remembered his wallet and keys were inside the locker room along with his civvies.

'At least something, small graces,' he muttered to himself as he entered the empty locker room. After getting changed quickly, he grabbed his wallet and keys and headed topside.

May 9th, 2005

Underground Sanctuary

Helen was engrossed in a report about a rare abnormal species that was sighted and captured by the far south American sanctuary. For a second, she considered they needed to improve the naming of the coverage areas of the existing sanctuaries before she got lost in the information.

A shrill sound coming from her tablet made her jump back to reality, 'General Jack O'Neill. Colorado entryway' flashed on her screen. She noticed Will quickly approved it. Grabbing her radio, she changed it to the general channel.

"You got a date, William?" Helen asked.

"No. He didn't call?" Will radioed back.

"Who?" Ashley interrupted

"General O'Neill, Colorado entryway," Henry added. "Huh, Doc, you might want to talk about this on your channel." Three 'sorry, Henry,'s came quickly.

"Should I pick him up?" Ashley asked, teleporting inside Helen's office.

"Find out if he is here for William or for me before you teleport him here," Helen advised. Ashley nodded. "Thank you, Ashley."

Ashley grinned and teleported herself to the exit of the entryway elevator. The outside signal told her that the scanner had turned on.

"Scan is starting now," Ashley radioed to her mom. "And it's done," she grinned. "Welcome back, Jack."

"Ashley, how are you?" He said, with a half-smile.

"I'm fine," she smiled. "So, you come for Will, or my mom, or both?"

"Your mother."

"Okey dokey, one quick transport to Magnus' office coming right up," she said before placing her hand on his shoulder. A second later, they were at Helen's office.

"General O'Neill," Helen greeted.

"Doctor Magnus," he nodded. Then he looked at Ashley, "Not to piss you off, Ash, but I need a word alone with your mother."

"Sure, I'm just the taxi nowadays," she winked at him. "Holler when you need a way out!" she yelled from the door.

Helen offered him the chair in front of her desk with a wave of her hand, and he took it. "Coffee? Tea? Perhaps some cake?" Helen offered, and Jack squinted at her.

"Why do I have the feeling that you are offering those as a peace offering?"

"Maybe because I am. Maybe it is a way to apologize," Helen tilted her head. "She finally told you, didn't she?" He sighed, and she saw the emotions going through his face quickly. "Definitively, cake. Will you want coffee with that?" she scrunched up her nose. "Will made a pot just seconds ago. He mentioned something about the coffee machine in my office being better than the one at his."

"I… sure," he nodded. She was already halfway to the coffee area when he managed to answer. Helen sighed, if there were one conversation, she would give a lot to postpone it was the one she was about to have. She felt responsible for having pressured him to move things along.

Helen shook herself. Finding a tray, she placed two mugs on it and poured coffee in one, and tea in the other. Then she went to the small fridge where one of the cooks had placed a chocolate cake that could've been made by the Gods themselves and got around to place two servings on the plates. Helen set the things she thought they might need on the tray and walked out to the sitting area. Watching her move, he jumped up to help, but she smiled.

"Take a seat, General. I'm glad to find that chivalry isn't dead yet." She smiled as he still walked towards her and grabbed the tray. "I know why you are here, and I know I am responsible for part of the mood you are currently in."

"So, you knew she," he inhaled deeply and decided to try the cake instead of attempting to finish that phrase.

"Yes, she announced it the same day she accepted," Helen nodded.

"This cake is really good," Jack said after he had swallowed it.

"The best one," Helen grinned.

"And you didn't tell me, why?"

"It wasn't my place, General. Would it have made any difference if I was the one delivering the news to you?"

"Yes?"

"There was a large chance that by not finding out from her, you would hate her for not telling you."

"I can't hate her," Jack confessed before he even realized he did.

"I know," Helen smiled. Jack squinted at her. "There is no need to look at me like that, General. I know firsthand that it is tough to hate someone you love."

"So, how did you know she told me?" Jack asked, taking another bite.

"Do not get me wrong, General, but you are not as hard to read as you believe you are," Helen chuckled at the face he made. "Samantha mentioned they were not on the mission roster for the week. Thus, they are safe. If your visit was related to impending world doom, you would be calling not wasting time coming down here. Also, hiding your sad eyes skills need some improvement. When was the last time you slept, General?" Jack opened his mouth but then said nothing, Helen sighed.

"You can talk to me about it. It won't leave this office, not even to William. I will not find you weak for falling in love, or for suffering for it. It takes a lot of strength to overcome something like this, and here you are, facing me. You could've hidden; you could've called me to ask me to cancel the plans. Still, you are here. The best thing, as a physician, I can prescribe you something that will help you sleep tonight."

"Like the thing Will put in my beer?" Jack raised his eyebrows.

"Well, if that's what you want. It does bring forward the most pleasant and realistic dreams."

"But?"

"I highly recommend you stay away from it, at this moment," Helen said, a bit too knowingly for Jack's taste.

"Sounds like you have reasons for that," Jack added, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Well, it will show you what you want the most, which I'm quite sure at this point will be related to Samantha. However, the downfall of knowing it won't happen is far worse once you have vividly experienced it," Helen grimaced. "As the phrase goes 'been there, done that'"

"I'll take your word for it."

"Excellent choice. I'll email a prescription of something more suitable for you. I suppose you haven't come here just to tell me you know of Samantha's engagement."

"Not really. For one, I wanted to know if you betrayed me by not telling me first," Jack saw Helen open her mouth. "I understand why you didn't, I think. Now, for the second, I came here to say that, despite all my best intentions, we need to stop the plan we had."

"Ah," Helen, let out. She made a weird face; he didn't quite understand what it meant. "There might be a small hitch." A grimace followed, and Jack frowned.

"Small hitch?"

"Indeed, General. The event we set on motion can't be stopped, only postponed. There will be a point in which you will be promoted out of the SGC, whether you like it or not. As for Samantha," she sighed. "I'm aware there are plans for her career if this plan of ours doesn't come to fruition."

"You mean to tell me there is no going back?"

"Not with the current events, no," Helen sighed. "Maybe I should've offered something stronger than cake and coffee," she tried to lighten up the mood but knew she failed. Magnus could see the weight she had just left over the General's shoulders as he looked at her in utter disbelief.

"I can't… I'm not sure…" Jack managed to utter, but he realized he couldn't articulate his thoughts properly.

"General," Helen started in the most reassuring tone she could muster. "There's plenty of time between now and when the reassignments take place. As I've said, I can delay it. Now, have in mind that many things could occur in between, maybe Samantha changes her mind, or perhaps you find that the best way to move on is getting out of the SGC."

"You are asking me to hope, Doctor."

"No, I'm asking you to mourn for what you think you've lost. And then, do what you must either to retrieve it or to finally let it go."

There was a knock on her door that made Helen frown. She checked her watch as she called out a quick 'enter' and gave Jack an apologetic smile.

"Think about it, General," she whispered as her door opened and Will entered the room.

"Helen, I've stalled the meeting all I could. Now, they are getting anxious, and you know how it is when they do," Will grimaced.

"Yes," Helen rolled her eyes. "Excuse me, General. The Council panics whenever I am not on time."

"No worries, Doc, I should go back before someone finds out I'm not there," he said.

"Go, Helen. I'll escort him out," Will told her as she turned once more to look at the General.

"Always a pleasure to meet you, General. Thank you, Will," she smiled at Will.

May 16th, 2005

Underground Sanctuary

"Magnus?" Henry's voice came through her comm device.

"Go ahead, Henry," Helen panted.

"You got a call request from General O'Neill," Henry explained his interruption.

"Can you patch him through to my comm? Or is the one I have a limited range version?" Helen asked huffing.

"Yours is fully functional. I should be able to patch it through easily, but, boss, are you sure this is a good time?" Henry asked. He could hear heavy breaths, huffs, pants and groans, sounds that made his wild imagination go wilder even if he knew full well what she was doing at the time as he was watching her from the security cameras.

"It never is a good time when they call for help, Henry," Helen pointed out. "Just do it already."

Helen, Nikola, two guys from the Northern European sanctuary, and two trainees working at Helen's sanctuary were scattered through one of the many cavern complexes around the Sanctuary. Someone from the Northern European Sanctuary failed to close a containment box properly, and the creature in it had managed to escape.
Now, the escaped abnormal was no other than the original mythological serpent Hydra itself. Due to its needs, Helen's Sanctuary was the most convenient place to keep it. Still, now, they were more focused on how to get it back into containment and survive, than in the needs of the creature. Helen was currently hiding behind a decent sized boulder, but she knew she couldn't stay there much longer.

"Doctor Magnus?" Jack's voice sounded loud in her ear when she decided to change positions and sprint towards another higher rock.

"General O'Neill? I'm currently in what one would call an unorthodox position. Henry patched your call from our phone lines to my communication device. The warning comes in case you hear something strange. Pray tell, what can I do for you?" She finished, moaning in pain as she flattened herself against the boulder and hit a protruding rock, but effectively avoided being reached by the abnormal.

"Ah, I'm not sure how to put this, Doctor," in his office, Jack eyed the phone weirdly before he shrugged. Helen's eyes fell on something that moved on her left and saw Nikola waving at her to join him in what looked like a hole big enough to hold them both far away enough from the creature.

"Just say it, General. Unless it is personal, then I would wait until we finish here," Helen said a bit too loud as she propelled herself forward and rolled toward the left, getting closer to Nikola's position. "This doesn't sound like a good time," Jack said, as he heard not only her ragged breath but a male puff, and a whispered 'Stay still, Helen,' that made him frown, because Jack was sure it was Nikola's voice, the combinations of sounds making him wonder what the hell was going on with the Doctor. Although he had some ideas, he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Somehow, one of the many heads of Hydra found Helen and Nikola. It tried to reach and bite them. "Well, there's no time like the present, General. Just speak loudly, so I can," she grunted as she barely missed being bitten by the creature.

"Nikola! Don't do that!" Magnus hissed, "so I can hear you, General," she completed her previous unfinished sentence.

"I'm not doing anything!" Nikola complained at the same time. "We need to move, Helen."

"Yes, you are. Stop it, don't move," Helen warned. "General, do go on."

"You are on the phone?" Nikola's voice reached Jack, followed by the sounds of something crashing.

"Yes! If you keep blabbering, I can't hear General O'Neill! Nikola! Bloody hell, stay still, or go further in!" Helen scolded him, as they flattened themselves as much as they could, the creature still trying to reach them.

"General, we can't capture this abnormal properly if you keep distracting her!" Tesla shouted, and Jack breathed, his mind now producing images he could live with on his next encounter with Will. Then, he shook his head to remind himself why he was calling in the first place.

"Carter has gone missing," Jack let out grimly.

"What? What do you mean by Carter has gone missing?" Helen asked, alarmed.

"Samantha is missing?" Nikola's head whipped around to look at Helen.

"It's a long story, Doc. We think the Trust has her."

"Okay, General, can you give us five minutes? We are very close to containing this creature, and then I'll be able to focus on your call completely."

"Very close, really?" Nikola snorted beside her, receiving an elbow to his chest.

"As things are, we are risking far too much, and I'm not giving the proper attention to either situation," she continued, dismissing Nikola's words.

"Sure, I can call later," he said.

"Stay on the line, General," she ordered him.

Then, she grabbed Nikola's comm, and she threw a set of orders quickly to the people listening. Jack heard her, giving some whispered directions to Nikola and then, more screams, gasps, and noises that now made sense with the scenario his mind was providing.

Jack figured Helen had a team around her helping, and he grinned as he understood that Sam's commandeering tone wasn't learned at the Carter household, but something she had inherited from her mother. The tone was so powerful that he almost jumped to the floor when she ordered someone to duck. He was still on the line when he heard some sort of laser being fired and a heavy thump. A 'Helen!' coming from further away followed.

"Nikola! Get this thing off me," Helen ordered when Nikola just stood there. "Now, Nikola!" she added, raising an eyebrow and looking at the two new trainees who were fighting to push the end of the tail off of her.

"That's what you get when you send rookies to do important work, Helen," Nikola grinned. "You look cute under its tail," he smirked and rolled his eyes at the menacing glare she gave him. "Okay, okay," he huffed, raising the tail over her easily and allowing her to slide from beneath it. "Are you hurt?"

"Not much, nothing that won't be fixed in a few hours," she replied as he helped her up. "Now, General, you said my daughter is missing?" Helen asked once she managed to find her comm that had flown out of her ear when the creature tailed her.

"You are on my private comm line, only I can hear you."

"Good. We lost our Stargate a couple of days ago. Carter was following a Trust operative when she suddenly disappeared as well," he confessed, making Helen frown.

"Should I ask Ashley to transport me there?"

"There's nothing you can do at the moment," Jack sighed. Helen frowned and looked at her tablet in confusion as if that would give her any answers.

"You said you lost the gate a couple of days ago. Why did you call me now, General?" She wondered.

"Well, I just wanted to let you know before you had a chance to call me yourself. For some reason, you always seem to know whenever we lose Carter for a moment."

"A mother's instinct perhaps. Should I worry about Samantha's whereabouts?"

"We are not there yet, Doc. Disappearance is better than finding a body."

"Okay. So, how exactly does one lose a Stargate?" Helen asked.

"We believe the Trust beamed it away to a cloaked ship they got their hands on. That's where we believe they are keeping her. We found poison and theorize they are launching attacks against the Goa'uld through the Stargate. Unfortunately, the poison can also kill the Tok'ra and millions of innocent Jaffa." We are currently trying to locate the ship and stop them from launching the poison."

"I see. And my daughter is somewhere in the middle of that?" Helen sighed.

"It seems that way. I meant to ask, have you received any incoming wormholes?"

"No, our gate is locked, protected, and out of reach," Helen said. "We only unlock it whenever you ask for our help, or Ashley joins your team."

"Can you double-check it?"

"Yes, give me a moment I'm reaching my office now. I need my computer to get past the security of that building," Helen explained. Jack heard the doors opening, and then the sound of a chair rolling. Typing followed, "Yes, General. Our gate is secured."

"Good, at least something is still in place," he whispered.

"General?" She started but grew quiet again.

"Yes, ma'am?" He asked, not knowing what she could have in mind.

"More than anything, I want my daughter back. I can't even begin to imagine losing her again, but I understand there are more lives at stake than just hers. We can't let them spread the poison. If it comes to a life or death decision, I'll understand your choice," she said firmly, and Jack froze.

"Come again, Doctor?" the General managed to say, shaking his head to clear the fog her words brought up.

"General, people like ourselves, are often presented with complex decisions. I have burdened you with my previous request of letting her be whoever she wants to be. Now, I want you to know that I'll understand whatever choice you make in any circumstance, or at least, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt," Jack opened his mouth several times before he sighed and rubbed his face tiredly. He didn't want to understand what her words meant, yet, he knew Helen was telling him that if it were a matter of saving someone else and losing Sam for good, she would try and understand what his reasons were.

"It won't come to that," Jack stated with more conviction than he felt.

"I'm sure it won't," Helen said in the same manner.

"Thank you, Doctor. That means a lot."

"Let me know if there's anything I can do to help you."

"I will. Ah, Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"I believe I've come to terms with the result of starting those plans we had," Jack confessed. "Probably getting out of here will be for the best."

"I'll be sad to see you go, General. You are good at your work, and you have found a way to keep us in the loop, which I appreciate. But if that's what you want."

"It is not what I want, Doc, but I believe it is how the situation has turned out," he mumbled.

"One day, you both will regret being so bloody stubborn. Trust me, I know from experience," Helen huffed.

"I'm regretting it already, Doctor. But I promised you I would allow her to be herself; I don't make promises lightly."

"I understand, and I regret I've asked that of you, General," Helen whispered, and she heard Jack sigh. "You can still try and have a decent life, even if that means settling."

"Yeah, I know, that part I've yet to come to terms with," he said, and Helen could imagine him shaking his head. "I should go now."

"Goodbye, General. Let me know if you find out something more."

"Will do. Bye."

A/N: For those of you who have noticed it (and those of you who haven't) Sam's speech marked with a (*) at the end, comes from Amanda Tapping's convocation speech at the University of Windsor.