Hi, sorry for taking so long, my beta isn't feeling quite right, so I'm posting it without her corrections. Hopefully, I caught most of my mistakes.
Enjoy,
M.
Update PS: My beta is back! :D
Chapter LII
May 29th, 2005
Sam's house.
It was late at night when Helen parked one of her bikes right next to Sam's car, hoping she would find Sam there. As Helen supposed after the dinner, Sam had all but disappeared on them, probably still dealing with her feelings after the previous night.
That Sam's house was dark wasn't a deterrent for Magnus. Having been there many times before, she took the side path to get herself into Sam's backyard and intended to get herself in using the back door. Helen smiled, not entirely surprised when she spotted a blanket on the ground and Sam lying on top of it.
"Mind if I join you?" Helen asked, scaring Sam a bit.
"You are already here, what good would it do if I said no?" Sam answered grimly, turning towards Helen and sitting on the floor.
"I'm sorry. I can always go back to my hiding place if you want me to…"
"For a moment, when I heard your steps, I thought it would be Ashley," Sam confessed as Helen sat next to her.
"Hmm, maybe soon it will be her here. Not tonight, though," Magnus added, laying on her back. Sam looked at her mother's odd behavior, and Helen chuckled at the widened eyes and the look of disbelief in Sam's face. "What do you find so surprising?"
"I don't know. I guess I have never pictured you as someone who would lie on the ground to watch stars," Sam shrugged.
"I did it quite a lot. I'd rather stand up at the rooftop of high buildings, there I have access not only to the night sky but to the city lights," she stopped for a second to smile. "There are times when Will and I escape to the top side only to check out the sky. Sometimes, we stay home and look at the lights of our city. It's not the same, it will never be, but we all have learned to love it," Helen said. Sam eyed her, and then she laid back on her back too, and they both contemplated the sky.
"There are so many things one takes for granted until they are gone," Helen whispered, Sam's sigh let out much more than air.
"Is it possible to learn how to love?" Sam asked after a while.
"Indeed, it is."
"I think we already talked about this. Can you possibly love two people at the same time?" Sam continued, still not looking at Helen.
"You can, and you will. Especially if you have the gift and the curse of living for as long as I have," Helen confessed.
"So, you are implying I can love Jack and Pete at the same time?"
"No, I'm not. You know you don't. You know it is different the way you love them," Helen said.
"Hmm, have you ever been in a relationship with someone you loved when there was someone you loved more out here?"
"I have," Helen said. "I have been in monogamous relationships and open ones. I have been cheated on, and sadly, I have cheated too. I have been in open relationships where one of them accepted my approach to life because he feared to lose me if he said no. Thus, I might not be the best example to follow, Samantha. I've made many mistakes, and I've hurt many people while doing them. Now, taking things for granted was always one of my worst habits. We've talked about your father and me, right?"
"Yes. You told me you love him."
"I do, very much. I love William, dearly. I can't imagine my life without either of them. I must remind myself every day that I can easily lose Will any day. Nikola seems more permanent, but there was a moment when he wasn't and it was utterly depressing to know that I could lose not only the only friend I have from my youth but a man that I love very much. Now, Nikola, he disappears on me whenever he feels he is taking me for granted."
"I guess what I'm attempting to explain is that you can learn to love, but it will never be the same as if you loved them from the start, Samantha. You will love someone and love someone else in an entirely different way. The truth is that you can't love two people in the same way. It is impossible because they are different, and you are different with each of them. Consider that not even the sky we are watching is immutable, it changes with the things that happen millions of light-years away from here, and it even changes with something so simple as going to a southern hemisphere country."
"You think people change?"
"No. I don't think people can change. I think we evolve; I think our experiences shape us continuously, but only because we allow them to do so. Also, besides who we are, those experiences help us connect with someone on several levels. You can try to get a feeling of what someone else's shoes might feel like, however, even if you share the same experience, the result of it will be different for both because of previous experiences. Unless you are an Empath," she smiled.
"Huh, I get it," Sam said. Another moment of silence passed by, "Why are you here anyway, Mom?"
"Truly?" Helen asked, turning her head for the first time towards Sam. Feeling observed, Sam turned her head and nodded once. "To tell you you shouldn't marry, Pete."
"I thought it was my choice," Sam said bitterly and sat, embracing her legs. Helen shook her head and followed Sam to a seated position. She accommodated herself in a way that she could see Sam and raised her daughter's head so there would be eye contact.
"It is your choice, Samantha. I'm merely stating my thoughts about it. Honestly, I thought I was biased before, that's why I also wanted to meet Pete properly. I thought about giving him a chance, so to speak."
"And here you are telling me you don't like him."
"I like the man I met yesterday, Samantha," Helen said.
"But?" Sam asked a deep frown in place. Helen decided that bringing out the list of 'buts' she had available would not cut it.
"I don't think you like him enough to spend the rest of his life with him. If you were, you wouldn't doubt so much about it."
"What if… what if I'm scared? What if I'm panicking because I fear commitment?"
"You? Fear commitment?" Helen asked with a raised eyebrow. "Honey, I know starting a new chapter in your life can be frightening. I understand what it is to lose everything you know to start over, but you know as well as I, that fear would never paralyze you. You wouldn't survive all those missions if it did."
"Different things, Mom," Sam pointed.
"Perhaps. Haven't you been engaged before?" Helen asked, remembering one conversation they had a long while ago.
"Yeah," Sam grimaced. "I ended it."
"Why?" Helen asked.
"He tried to force himself on me," Sam whispered. "He apologized later, but I couldn't let that issue go. He attempted it once, so the chances are he would've attempted it again. He was a nice guy, even if he ended up a lot crazier than I thought he would."
"Somehow, that sounds oddly familiar." Helen shook her head. "This is far from my area of expertise, Samantha. Does thinking about a long-lasting relationship make you feel anxious?"
"No," she answered after a while of analyzing her feelings.
"What about the idea of getting married and sharing a life with someone?" Helen asked again, eyeing her.
Sam smiled. She knew deep down she would happily share her lifetime with Jack with little much of a thought. She shook her head, not sure if it was because she was thinking of Jack again or if it was only to get rid of her line of thoughts.
"No," she let out again.
"I honestly don't think you have a phobia to commitment. I think you might fear the changes and how they will affect your future life. You are used to coming and going whenever you need to; you are accustomed to Ashley popping up in your living room to fetch you. There are also those team nights all your teammates spoke off. Those will be different if not disturbed by having him join you. Until your teammates get comfortable around him, at least."
Sam hummed and leaned back again, looking at the stars. Helen knew there was more to it than she was letting out, wondering exactly what it was. Although she considered it might be something Sam would be more comfortable sharing if she weren't staring at her, so she also laid down again.
"Mom?" Sam whispered after a while, Helen hummed as an answer. "You are 275 years old," she continued, Helen turned around to look at her trying to figure out where this was going. "You had Ashley, then me," she pointed to herself, sitting again she felt her mother's eyes on her. "Never mind."
"Where were you going with that line of thought, Samantha?" Helen asked after another couple of minutes ticked by, and Sam hadn't spoken again.
"I don't know exactly how to word it?" Sam flinched.
"Just say what's on your mind, Samantha," Helen offered.
"Why didn't you have more children?" Sam asked, and Helen frowned.
"Bad timing, I suppose," she answered honestly after a few seconds of considering the question. "I probably wouldn't have either of you if I thought things through."
"Why?"
"One of my greatest fears, when I brought you to term, was the amount of danger you would be subjected to, but then, John took that away from me. When I brought Ashley to term those fears were still there, and having lost you, only added to them. Perhaps, if I had been a good girl, and I had never conceived Ashley, I would never have had the idea of birthing either of you."
"So, you never wanted to be a mom?"
"I did, I had a hard time reconciling the mother I wanted to be, with whom I am. I knew what I didn't want to be; I didn't want to be an absent mom since I never knew what it felt like to have one. I wanted to be there for birthdays and all the firsts. I didn't manage that with you, but I managed with Ashley and Henry when I adopted him into our weird little family."
"And along came Will?" Sam grinned.
"Well, you could say that. You know, I've never asked William if he wants kids. To be honest, I'm afraid he might say no." Sam's expression changed then. Somehow, the pieces of the puzzle fell in place in Helen's mind.
"So, you can still have kids?" Sam asked in wonder.
"Yes, I can. Do you remember when I explained how my genetics keep me at this age forever?"
"Yes. Cell replacement happens only if the original cell and the duplicate are identical," Sam said.
"Well, the same thing happens with my eggs. My egg count doesn't change, and they don't age either."
"So, you have your periods and all?" Sam asked.
"Not really, I can restart a cycle whenever I want while avoiding the period. I only need to enter death sleep for that. Thus, we don't have a real need for a period. A death sleep can overrule the usual biological processes by resetting every cell. I'm sure you've never had a long, painful one, and most likely, you blamed stress whenever you didn't have one."
"What about me?" Sam asked, worrying her lower lip.
"Now that you are in control of your healing, you should be able to enter a death-sleep to control your cycles," Helen answered.
"No, I mean…" Sam took a deep breath. "Can I be a mother?"
The final piece finally fell in place, and Helen understood where this was coming from. Maybe even from where the real weight that had made her accept Pete's proposal came.
"Honey, Nikola's gametes are also on a never-ending cycle of creation. Your father also can be a father whenever he so decides. Taking our combined genetics, and what I've seen from your DNA, I'd say you can be a mother now or can be one in a hundred years from now. But if you want to be sure, we can run some tests. Is that something that has been bothering you?"
"Yeah," she grimaced.
"Why? Don't look at me like that, Samantha. I'm genuinely at a loss." Sam rubbed her face tiredly.
"I'm thirty-six, Mom. People at base know this; they try to celebrate my birthday every year! Now that my engagement is out there, they are all asking me when I'll have kids because my biological clock is ticking away."
"It's been ages since the last time someone asked me about my biological clock and criticized my personal life choices like that. I understand the pressure, don't allow it to get to you; you are something special that most people won't ever understand."
"Easy for you to say," Sam rolled her eyes.
"I guess it is, but you have to give me some credit here. I outgrew that phase before the 1900s," Helen added, smiling. "Honey, you have all the time in the world to decide what you want to do with yourself, others are not so lucky. Some people want you to have the happiness they have in their families, and they don't realize that, even if you want it, it is something that weighs you down."
"I envy them sometimes. They have their perfect little families, with their almost perfect normal lives. Sometimes I feel like I suck. That I can be oh so smart and pretty as they say, but I can't get my life sorted as they can."
"Let me tell you an ancestral truth: we all feel a bit lost sometimes, Samantha. Even someone as old as myself or your father experience that from time to time. It is part of life. If we were all so certain about our fates, we wouldn't risk as much as we do, and we would stop caring because everything would be given. We, for some reason, don't like the things we get easily, we like the things that make us better, that make us fight for them."
"You and Will don't seem to have fought that much to be together," Sam pointed out.
"Yet, I had to smuggle him to the Sanctuary because the council was against his return," Helen smiled. "Honey, sometimes we don't see the others struggle, sometimes we are too distracted comparing our chaos with the little we know or see about others. We are all struggling at some level."
Another silence followed until Helen's cellphone vibrated in her pocket. She checked the caller ID, sighed, and answered with a short 'on my way' before she stood up.
"Consider this, Samantha. How would you feel if two days from now a Goa'uld ship reached Earth's orbit, and this time, there was nothing you could do to fight back? Let's pretend there were no rules either. Where would you rather be that last night? How would you rather wake up that last morning?"
Sam smiled, her mind provided her with an image of herself with her head nested on Jack's shoulder while they sat together doing nothing much. Followed by the way his head turned around and how his lips collided with hers. She saw then how those same lips explored her body and how perfect it was to be in his arms, surrounded by him, filled by him. How his heartbeat lulled her to sleep after they reached the peaks of ecstasy, and their bodies cooled off. And how she woke up early in the morning when the first rays of the sun fell on her eyes, feeling utterly happy in her personal cocoon that was Jack O'Neill's embrace.
"I believe you know perfectly what that answer is, Samantha. I'm not sure why you are still doubting. Now, unless there's something else you want to ask, I shall go."
"Thanks, mom."
June 2nd, 2005
SGC
If someone reminded Sam of her last Pete-related conversation with her mom, over four days earlier, Sam would consider that her mom also had some premonitory powers in her skill set. Since two days after it, everything went to hell and back.
On the last day of May, the SGC received a 'gate-call' from a replicator version of herself, and everything got increasingly complicated after that. Fearing she had given away the existence of the Sanctuary to the replicators, Sam had asked Jack for authorization to let her mom know about the situation.
After meeting the 'repliCarter,' as Jack called it, Sam reported the good news that she somehow hadn't allowed the creature to gain access to the information about the Sanctuary. However, as hopeful as that sounded, she had allowed the human-form to make herself, and all the pieces connected to her, immune to the only weapon Earth had to destroy them.
So, given her involvement with the loss of the weapon, Sam had tripled her efforts to find a solution. It was then, after seeing she hadn't left the base since that last day of May, that Jack called her to his office.
"Come in," Jack said, and Sam peeked her head in. "Ah, Carter! Please come in. I would have searched for you, but you know how things are," he said, waving his hands over his desk that was somewhere under a mountain of folders. "It seemed easier to call you."
"I'm sure you didn't call me to explain why you called me, sir," she offered with a grin, and he rolled his eyes at her.
It always had amazed Sam how easily they could banter with each other, their familiarity (and feelings) permeating their conversations as if it was just the right thing. And how easily they could slip back to their military personas where all their feelings ended bottled up behind years of training.
"Sadly, I didn't. Although it seems it's been ages since we last talked," Jack added the last part as an afterthought, the tip of his lip curling up slightly. "You think your parents can help you with whatever issue we have with the…" he waved in the air, not remembering the name of the gun, "replicator-gun?" Sam sighed.
"Honestly?" Sam asked, and he nodded as an answer. "I'm not sure, sir. I can send them the specs of the disruptor and ask them to analyze all the information we have. That alone could take them at least a week if they devote to it. If you agree, sir, I can prepare all the data we have available and send it on their way. I'm sure the extra couple of eyes wouldn't hurt in our situation."
"Why I feel a 'but' coming?" He asked, and she sighed again.
"Because, sir, we don't know for sure how she has adapted those changes to herself. I've been racking my mind with a way to check if it works. Or at least to test how they changed to make themselves immune to it. But I can't come up with anything that won't endanger us even more. We can't exactly bring a replicator here to test it."
"Carter," Jack said in a tone she had heard before, his 'I trust you' voice. Sam looked at him, and she saw the reassurance in his eyes. "I know you didn't do it on purpose. I understand you saw her as a part of yourself, and you thought she would have the same values you have. Now, we all know that even if she looks like you, and she has your voice, your eyes, and some of your memories, she is far more dangerous than she seems. Trust me, now I know for sure I shouldn't piss you off that much," he added as a joke, and she snorted.
"It is my fault, sir," Sam whispered.
"Don't kick yourself over it, it's done," Jack said and looked at her. "You know you can tell me anything, right? I'm your friend," he offered.
Jack tried not to pay attention to the way his heart constricted by that thought. He was only her friend, and that was what he would be till the end of his days now that she had chosen. Sam saw something flick on his eyes but decided it was a figment of her imagination, a hidden desire that he would love her as she did, and he would fight for her if that were the case. She huffed.
"Carter?" Jack asked, confused by the way she was looking at him and the huff she had let out.
"It's… I'm not sure how to explain it, sir."
"Try using words?" He joked as if only was to make her smile a little. She shook her head and lowered it, only noticing that Jack moved to sit on the chair next to her when she felt his hand on her shoulder.
"I blame myself for this, and I'm right, sir. I should have thought about the consequences. I should have known she was playing me."
"Carter, look at me," Jack whispered, and she slowly raised her eyes to meet his. "No one blames you. Heck, we all have our share of mistakes. Think about how many times we got in trouble 'cause of me or Daniel's big mouth? I'm sure Daniel wouldn't have died so many times if we didn't screw things up."
"But that was just us, not the fate of the whole galaxy," Sam sighed.
"Yeah, but you know who rarely screwed things up? You, Carter. And we always counted on you to save us," he said and searched her eyes, trying to see if she understood what he was saying. Jack wanted nothing more than to take that thin strand of hair that always fell near her face and move it away while caressing her soft skin slightly with the tip of his fingers, but his mind told him it was hardly appropriated because of the place they were at, because of that ring that hung along with her dog tags. "I know it is difficult for you to let go of it because you feel it was of your doing. But you must, Carter. We need you thinking straight and doing the best you can. The truth is, we can't do this without you."
"What if I can't do it?"
"Then, we will have a heck of a fight to keep Earth from falling into their metallic hands."
"I…"
"So," he clapped his hands just to bring them both out of the weird mood they had ended up in, "prepare your things and send them to your parents."
"Are you sure, sir? We contacted the Asgard, they should answer soon."
"I know, but until they answer us, I believe we all could benefit from you three nerd-heads and hopefully make more progress. Unless you'd prefer a geek squad backup from Area 51?" Jack outright laughed at Sam's expression.
"I'll take it to my parents, sir. Just keep in mind that there's a huge chance that we can't do much."
"Haven't you heard, Carter? We are not past 'do much' yet," Jack grinned. There was another knock on his door. "I'd rather you get all the 'do-not-work' out of the way now that we have time, and not when it becomes another 'we-need-a-miracle' situation." He said before he rolled his eyes and moved to sit on his chair as he shouted, "Come in!"
"Jack," Kerry said, and Sam straightened in her place. "Sorry, I didn't know you were busy."
"Carter, have you met Agent Kerry Johnson?"
"I haven't had the pleasure, sir," Sam said, trying to sound neutral. "I'm Lt. Colonel Carter, ma'am. Sir, if you don't mind, I would like to start on that thing we were talking about?"
"Sure, Carter. Knock yourself out" Jack grinned.
"Agent Johnson. Sir," Sam said before she left the room.
"So, that is Colonel Carter, huh? No wonder the rumors," Kerry said, plopping herself on the chair Sam had just vacated.
"I have no idea what you are talking about, Kerry."
"Ah, at least I'm back to being Kerry," she purred. "I'm sure you know exactly which rumors I'm talking about, Jack. You know, the mill says you two are an item, and the way you look at her," she whistled. "I understand from where it comes. Besides, she is hot." Jack raised his eyebrows, surprised by her comment. "Come on, I'm a woman, but I can appreciate a fellow beauty, right?"
"I guess you can. However, you need to take that idea of us being an item out of your mind, Kerry. Lt. Colonel Carter is engaged, and not to me."
"Why do I feel a hint of disappointment?" Kerry hummed.
"Kerry," he warned. "What did you want?"
"Well, I was coming to say goodbye, but now that I know you are unattached. Why don't you take me to dinner tonight?"
"I can't, I'm busy," he said, waving over his desk.
"You still need to eat," she grinned, standing up. "Pick me up at 8. You know where I'm staying." Kerry stood up and walked towards the door, stopping right in front of it. "Oh, and Jack, I'm glad the Colonel is taken, I'm not sure I could stand a chance against her," she said before she walked away, leaving a bewildered Jack behind.
June 16th, 2005
Dakara
Everything that could go wrong since the first appearance of the RepliCarter went wrong. Daniel and Sam had gone to a Jaffa Rebels mission that ended up with Daniel missing to the replicators. They had lost the Hat'ak they were traveling in against a replicator vessel.
Sam and her parents had ended up on Thor's ship to fix the new disruptor, only to find that no matter how many attempts they did at improving it, the replicators seemed to adapt to them. After one lousy attempt, Thor had dropped them on Earth before he took off, and Sam decided there was a big chance she had got Thor killed.
Sam looked around the cavern they were in and had to cringe. Having her mother and two fathers working on trying to figure out what could be the last hope for humanity on a planet the Jaffa had just secured, while not only Anubis fleet but also the replicators were heading there seemed like the plot to a bad sci-fi novel. The unrealistic situation where everyone figured out what to do, and both the good and the bad end depended solely on the hero before the villain got them killed, was a bit too much. Hopefully, the whole thing ended up being a close call. And yes, she had been in close calls before, but if it happened, this one would take the top.
Ba'al raised an eyebrow as his holographic-self looked at her. Yes, Ba'al, one of her arch-enemies, and he was helping.
"Can you stop looking at us like that?" Sam hissed, and he only tilted his head slightly amused.
Helen looked up with a raised eyebrow. First, she followed Sam's line of sight to look at the smug-looking Ba'al. Then, knowing the complaints he had let out before the Goa'uld appeared, Helen stole a glance towards Jacob and frowned.
There was something uncharacteristic happening with Jacob Carter, and Helen couldn't pinpoint if it was only because of the situation, or if there was more to it than he was letting on. Nikola huffed.
"Is he always this annoying?" Nikola asked, looking at the cause of the women's distraction.
"Yes," both Carters' answered at once.
Soon, the situation changed once more, Ba'al ship was compromised, and he left. A replicator ship parked close by, and hundreds of spiders neared them. Ashley teleported from the outside where she was before near to her mom and sister. "We got it," Nikola shouted to them the moment the pesky machines walked again.
"Do it!" Sam shouted to her fathers.
"Now!" Helen yelled.
The Stargate engaged as the rocks covering the weapon fell around the ancient compound of Dakara. They blinked, and the replicators became dust in front of their eyes.
"I hope that didn't kill any of my inventions back home," Nikola said as Jacob leaned over, resting his head on the solid table.
"I believe you didn't have any replicators when we left, Nikola," Helen grinned. "We should get back and see if this situation affected us."
"Thanks, Mom, Nikola."
"Your welcome," Nikola grinned proudly.
"We didn't do much, Samantha."
"It was faster because you came," Jacob said, and Helen observed him again.
"Samantha, shouldn't you try to report back to the SGC?" Helen asked. Sam nodded before she walked towards the DHD. Then Magnus nodded to Nikola to leave and take the people with him. As he did, Helen turned to the Tok'ra once more. "Can I have a word with you, Jacob?"
"Sure," Jacob said, not sure of what she wanted to talk about.
"You don't look too well, should I worry?"
"No, nothing to worry. I'm just tired," Jacob half-smiled.
"I'm not Samantha, and I can tell you are lying. Selmak, tell me the truth since Jacob won't," she requested firmly.
"We are fine, Helen. A bit tired, it was a stressful situation, that's all."
"If something was wrong, would you trust me to help you?" Helen asked, concerned.
"I… We can't ask you that," Jacob said.
"You are not asking. I am volunteering. I'm not a Tok'ra or an Ancient, but I have access to a lot more resources if you need them."
"If either of us needs help, Helen, I'll trust you to help him," Selmak said. That phrasing struck Helen as mildly odd.
"Mom," Sam called, and they went quiet. "Ashley and Nikola are ready to return. You should go. When we finish here, we'll gate back to the SGC. I will call you when I'm back."
June 16th, 2005
Underground Sanctuary
After the events that ended up with her on Dakara, Helen had locked herself in her office, trying to make up for the time she wasn't at the Sanctuary. But Will knew her better and had an inkling there was more to it than just catching up with work.
Even though he had decided not to annoy her on the matter, allowing her to process whatever she needed to process before she shared it with him. Still, he felt he had to intervene, eventually.
Will had shared Helen's bed for almost three years and knew that tossing and turning wasn't usual for her. He hadn't fallen asleep before she started doing it. So, when she turned once more, kicking him in the shin as she did, Will sat on the bed and turned the light on.
"Helen, what's wrong?" He asked, and the sigh she let out was more telling than anything she had done so far. Then, surprising him, she clung to him as if he was a lifeline that she couldn't let go. "Hey, honey, talk to me," Will said, caressing her back softly. "What happened out there that left you so distressed?"
"We almost didn't make it on time, Will," Helen confessed in a whisper. "I almost lost Ashley and Samantha, and that would have happened right in front of my eyes. And while I was there waiting to shoot at the replicators, I couldn't stop thinking about you, and how I wanted to tell you how much I love you. Then the thought of losing not only you three but the whole sanctuary and life as we know it, it was too much. I kept it hidden until I couldn't escape from my thoughts, and here we are."
"What do you mean?" She sighed and moved away from him enough to watch him.
"We were some minutes away from being completely obliterated by machinery bugs. If they hadn't stopped for a few minutes as they did, Nikola and Jacob wouldn't have had the time to fix the weapon, and the whole universe would've been doomed," Helen explained while fidgeting with her hands.
"That's a lot of doom," Will said. "I get how that can affect anyone, but you rarely dwell that much in what if's."
"I know. I guess it's because I haven't had the time to rationalize that I could have lost everything I love. That might be what's taking a lot of space in my mind now I finally have time to dwell on the last few days."
"Is there something more, Honey?"
"Honey," Helen grinned, and he blushed. "That's coming out of you a lot lately."
"You like 'love' better? I think sweetheart is a bit too childish," he mocked her accent.
"Oh hush," she waved, understanding he was trying to make her feel at ease. "Honey is good," Helen affirmed, also blushing.
"Sure, sweet pie." Will winked at her. "I like it when you call me darling," he confessed, and she chuckled.
"The things one learns," Magnus shook her head, amused.
"You don't have to do it, Helen," Will said. "You don't have to tell me the rest if it bothers you that much."
"I think Jacob Carter is hiding something from Samantha. I'm not sure what it is, but he seemed tired when we left."
"You think he might be sick?" Will asked.
"I think Selmak might be sick, which is worse. If Jacob was the sick one, she should be able to heal him in no time."
"Can you help them?"
"Them? I am not sure. I could get Jacob inside a cryo chamber in case we ran out of time to find out how to cure them both. Or, I could try to separate Selmak from Jacob. As far as I know, the Goa'uld symbiote is similar to the scarab I took from my father in the way they connect to the host. If I can get a good scan of how Selmak and Jacob are linked, I should be able to remove her without harming either."
"But?"
"That's a choice Jacob must make. However, so far, I am presuming things, William. Jacob has not confirmed he or Selmak being sick or wanting my help."
"I," he tried to come up with words any words, but before he could, she kissed him.
"I know I can't fix the issues of this world tonight, William," she smiled knowingly as he broke the kiss. "I just need to stop thinking for a while."
If there was anything that Will understood to the bone, it was Helen's need to get lost in the throes of passion for being able to stop thinking. Just like her when he needed it, Will was more than willing to help. It was after a while of soft caresses, loving kisses, and sweet and passionate lovemaking that Helen rested cocooned between his arms, and he caressed her naked back slowly.
Will's mind chose that time to remind him that Helen could have got a long life span, but she was as mortal as he was. The memory of having killed her flashed through his mind, and he bit his lip not to let out a gasp and startle her now that she was breathing calmly. For the first time since they had taken the leap of faith into this part of their relationship, he considered he wasn't sure if he could live without her.
"Helen?" Will let out before he could stop himself, a question burning on his mind.
"Hmm?"
"Marry me?" he asked, and she raised her head to find him looking at her as if she was the most precious thing in the world.
"Are you serious, or are you the one dwelling on the what-ifs now?" He smiled. She knew him so well.
"I have been, and it is not because of it," Will whispered, caressing her face softly. "I love you, Helen. I've loved you for a long time. Truth is, it would honor me to be called your husband," he whispered.
"You are crazy," she said, lowering her head against his heart again, but she could not contain the smile that had formed on her face. "Yes."
"What?"
"Yes." She grinned. "I do not understand why you want to marry me if we both don't believe in that whole institution. But yes, if that's what you want."
"I want you, pieces of you, all of you… whatever you are willing to give me."
"Then, by all means, it will honor me to be called your wife."
June 20th, 2005
SGC
"Come in," Jack shouted and smiled when he saw who his visitor was. "Dad, how are things?" He said, pointing to the chair in front of his desk. Calling Jacob Carter 'Dad' was a bittersweet experience before, now it was plain painful. But he knew Ol' Jake liked it when he did.
"Well, the Tok'ra council isn't too happy with me having stolen that device. But half of them agree that it was what we needed to prevent the Replicators from taking over our universe."
"And you are here to hide from them until the waters are calmer?" Jack offered.
After facing the almost Armageddon, because of the little pieces of machinery that mutated to half-sentient beings, and their miraculous winning - thanks to a mix of Ancients, Tok'ra, humans and abnormals. Jacob had returned to the Tok'ra to inform the council of the things that had transpired around the universe.
If he was honest, it surprised Jack when they received the Tok'ra IDC earlier and Jacob Carter came down the ramp. He didn't expect him to return so suddenly, not after helping them. In his books, the Tok'ra loved to ask for help but rarely liked helping in return.
"Yes, I'm here to hide from them until the waters are calmer," Jacob grinned.
"Well, since that's it and you already went through our safety things, I guess you are free to roam as you always do," Jack said. This time, Jacob grimaced.
"Not exactly."
"What do you mean?"
"Doc Frasier hasn't allowed me to leave the base, Jack. So, I'm here to ask you three things, one of them I know you won't like. I'm also aware it might be painful for you." Jacob said with a grim expression on his face that made Jack frown.
"What is it, Jacob?"
"Selmak is sick, Jack. So, my first request is: please don't tell Sam anything about it? I will let her know."
"What's two and three?" Jack asked without answering.
"I need to contact her mother without Sam knowing. Helen offered to help, and Selmak says it might be a chance we didn't have before. I'm sure Doc Frasier will let me out if it is for medical purposes."
"If she doesn't, I'm sure we could find a way," Jack nodded, thinking of Ashley's teleporting skills. "So, the one I won't like?"
"Someone mentioned Sam is engaged."
"Someone? She didn't tell you?"
"I haven't exactly talked that out of her yet, but I will. So, the thing is, I'm not sure how much time I have here, and with Selmak's current condition, I can't exactly get out to meet the guy," he grimaced. "What are the chances of granting him some access so he can meet me here?"
"Well, the guy has some access. I can check what I can do for you."
"Thanks, Jack. I always knew you were a great man. I hoped you would be a great son at some point, but I guess our career choices don't give the best outcomes sometimes."
"Yeah. Well, I'll get Doc Magnus for you and see what we can do about your requests."
"I guess I'll be in my room until then."