A/N: Again thanks for the reviews. In this chapter, spot the really obvious stealing of part of a Friends scene – it just came out as I was writing ;) It's hard to write this at the moment because my natural instinct is to hurry up and get Ross and Rachel together as they should be, but it's not realistic to do that so fast. And I agree with David Schwimmer when he said it wasn't really true to Ross' character to have him marry Emily in such a rush after what happened with Carol, a woman he really loved and who hurt him, so I'm trying to balance the two here. I bet I'm not succeeding, lol, but oh well!

Not a lot else to say except I've been watching Season 9 Friends all day, and TOW Emma Cries gets so sad when Ross is with Joey in the hospital and Joey points out that Rachel would have agreed to marry anyone just after having the baby, and Ross says, 'But I don't want to be just anybody.' It made me cry, but then I am PMT-hormonal…

R rated chapter for a bit of sex and some language.

Chapter Six

Tonight you're mine completely

You give your love so sweetly

Tonight the light of love is in your eyes

But will you love me tomorrow?

As Ross walked back to his apartment after the party, he couldn't help thinking that the evening hadn't been as bad as he had been expecting. Far from it; he'd managed to have a real conversation with Rachel and not make too much of a fool of himself, although he still wished he hadn't started moaning on about his marriage. If there was one thing guaranteed to drive a woman away, it was talking about another woman, or so Ross imagined. He didn't know why he cared. He shouldn't care, not when he was going home to his wife.

Yeah, right. As if she'll even notice I'm there.

When Ross opened the front door, however, he began to doubt his earlier statement. Melissa was sitting on the sofa, wearing nothing but a very revealing nightdress, and surrounding her were dozens of candles, each giving off a lovely scent. For a moment Ross couldn't help wondering if he was in the wrong flat, but then Melissa stood up and came over to him, and he froze. It crossed his mind that he might be dreaming; it had happened before.

"Hey Ross," Melissa said huskily, kissing him on the cheek. "I've been waiting for you."

Ross blinked. "Uh, all night?"

Melissa laughed softly. "Of course. You're my husband and I really think we haven't been spending enough time together lately. What do you think?"

It was difficult to think at all when she was pressed right up against him, her lips mere inches from his. This was a position he hadn't found himself in for what seemed like a very long time, and for some reason it was making him slightly nervous. Ordinarily he would be thinking that it was odd for Melissa to suddenly try to seduce him when for months she'd been avoiding him like the plague, but his brain wasn't operating correctly.

"Uh, I think that's cool," was all he managed before she pounced, kissing him and pulling him down to the floor, where they made love just like they did when they first got together, except this time Ross couldn't escape a nagging feeling at the back of his mind. Unfortunately, it couldn't quite compete with the more than nagging feeling elsewhere in his body, so he forgot about it for the moment, glad that maybe his marriage wasn't going to fail after all.

"Oh God." Melissa always said the same thing before she came, and this time was no different as she closed her eyes and threw her head back. Ross would have watched her, but something else happened instead. He closed his eyes, saw Rachel smiling at him, and that was it.

Melissa's eyes snapped open and she glared up at Ross, who felt very exposed all of a sudden, despite the fact he was with his wife.

"What the hell? You could've waited for me!" She let out a noise of frustration and scrambled out from underneath him, reaching for her robe and tying it around her. "Looks like I'll just have to finish me off myself," she said bitingly, striding to the bathroom where she slammed the door and locked it loudly.

Ross lay on the floor and sighed. Now she was going to be awful to live with for days until she forgave him for being such a selfish lover. He didn't care. It was bad enough having his own guilt settling in his stomach when he thought about what had finished him off. Rachel. Thinking about Rachel, a girl who he'd met twice and both times bored to tears, probably. It just didn't make sense; he'd never even considered another girl during sex before.

"I need some air," he said, to no one in particular, and after hastily getting dressed, headed out to the cold night and to the one person he was sure would listen to him: Monica.

Monica usually kept her door unlocked during the day, as so many people came and went, but it was unusual for it to still be open past midnight and post-party. Ross frowned as he tried the doorknob and found no resistance. He stepped inside and was immediately struck by how untidy the apartment was; the party had ended over an hour before and Monica hadn't cleaned yet. It was all very weird and Ross couldn't help worrying, especially as his sister was nowhere in sight.

"Monica?" he called as he pushed the door closed behind him. "Mon? Are you here?"

"Just a minute!" she replied from the bedroom, and thirty seconds later she appeared, with her hair slightly dishevelled and tying a dressing gown around her waist. She smiled a little too brightly for Ross to believe she was truly happy to see him. "Ross, hey! What are you doing back here? Do you know what time it is?" Now she was putting on her fake-cheerful voice, and Ross rolled his eyes.

"Never mind, I'll go," he said, and turned to leave, but Monica grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"No, no, don't go," she said quietly. "Sorry, just tired. What's up?" She led him across to the sofa and they sat down together, Monica crossing her legs beneath her as she waited for Ross to speak.

"It's Melissa," he sighed, feeling depressed merely saying her name.

"Oh, no. What happened this time?"

"We had sex."

Monica looked confused at this. "And that's a problem, why?"

Ross groaned and dropped his head in his hands. "I know, it sounds stupid. But I fucked it up, Mon. I… I was thinking about someone else."

At this, Monica let out a gasp and Ross looked up reproachfully. "What? Who? I didn't know you did that!"

"I don't! I mean, not usually, okay? I've never been that sort of guy. I'm not Joey!"

Monica shrugged and nodded at this. "That's very true. So what made you do it this time? Was it that crap?"

It was Ross' turn to shrug. "To be honest, I can't really remember. All I know is Melissa started the whole thing and my heart wasn't really in it. She's been acting so weird recently and suddenly she wants sex? I don't get it. And it just… happened. For me. Nothing happened for her after that, which is probably why she got so mad and locked herself in the bathroom."

Monica continued to look surprised at these revelations. "Well, on one hand I can't say I blame her. What's the point of sex without…?" She caught sight of Ross' expression and quickly changed tack. "But I agree, that does seem strange that she was all over you for no reason. Except maybe that she's your wife…"

"Is she? I'd kinda forgotten," Ross said, somewhat bitterly. That infuriated him more than anything. He never used to be bitter before Melissa. He'd always been pretty optimistic and despite some rough knocks, he'd always tried to see the good side of things. Now, though, all he could see was being trapped in this bizarre marriage.

Monica aimed a sympathetic look his way. "Ross, come on. Don't beat yourself up about this. You're not the only person to have thought about another girl during sex. You never know, she might have been thinking of someone else as well." Monica sighed, and Ross glared at her. "Sorry. That was stupid of me."

"Yeah, it was," Ross said sulkily, reverting for a moment to when they were kids and everything was easier. Well, not everything… but some things.

"Can I ask, who were you thinking about?"

"No, you can't ask," Ross retorted. "Look, thanks for listening, but I guess I'd better get back…" He paused, his eyes having come to rest on a shirt half-hidden under the coffee table. He recognised it immediately, and narrowed his eyes at Monica. "Mon? What the hell is Chandler's shirt doing on the floor?"

Monica's mouth dropped open only a tiny bit before she recovered her composure, but Ross had already seen her expression and was on his feet in a flash.

"Oh my God, he's here isn't he? You weren't tired! You're… sleeping with him? I don't believe this!" Ross knew deep down that he was probably overreacting, but taking his anger out on this situation was preferable to waiting until he went home. "Chandler! I wanna word with you!"

"Ross, stop it!" Monica hissed, but Ross was already at the bedroom door, banging on it hard. "Ross!"

"Come on Chandler, you're only my best friend, why shouldn't I be elated you're shagging my baby sister!" Ross roared, feeling the tension lease out of him a bit.

"Ross, for God's sake, calm down!" Monica shouted, yanking his arm down and glaring at him. "You're being ridiculous!"

"Oh, I'm being ridiculous? Never mind you and him!" Ross banged once more for good measure before backing away from the door and sinking down into the armchair. "I don't believe this…"

Monica sat down on the coffee table, looking anxious. "I'm so sorry, we didn't want you to find out like this," she said pleadingly. "Please just calm down."

"How long has this been going on for?" was Ross' question, ignoring Monica's last words. "How long has this been a secret? Does anyone else know? Does Joey know?"

"Maybe…"

"Oh, this is great," Ross said sarcastically. "Joey knows before I do. Shouldn't be surprised, really. I'm bloody useless at everything anyway, who'd want to tell me anything?"

Monica moved over so she was sitting on the arm of the chair. "Ross, that's not why we didn't tell you. Joey walked in on us kissing a few weeks ago; we didn't tell him, and we wouldn't have told him if that hadn't happened. Certainly not before we told you! Don't be silly! You're my brother! Ross, I want you to be happy for me. Chandler and I have been together for over four months, and it's going really well. Neither of us expected it to. In fact, we're still scared we'll mess up, so we wanted to wait till we were sure before we told you." She smiled. "Come on, you're the best brother ever. You have to see that this is a good thing. I've finally found someone I love."

Ross closed his eyes and leaned back in the sofa. He knew she was right; of course she was right. He would never stand in the way of his sister's happiness, and he supposed the fact she was happy with his best friend had to be better than with some strange guy he knew nothing about.

When Ross opened his eyes again, he pulled Monica in for a hug.

"I am happy for you, Mon," he said truthfully. "One of us should be in love, at least." He kissed the top of her head, and she laughed and looked up.

"You'll be in love again," she said gently. "I know you will."

Ross nodded, but inside he was wondering if that was ever going to be possible when right then, he felt he might never love again.

Ross didn't see Melissa again until the following afternoon, when their paths crossed on Ross' way to the coffee shop, and Melissa's way somewhere else. They exchanged an uncomfortable look before Ross went over to her, realising he had to make the effort, because he was pretty sure she wasn't going to.

"Hey Mel," he said as amiably as he could manage. "Where are you off to?"

"Just back to work," she replied, over-cheerfully. "I had an early lunch, loads to do, you know what it's like." She gave him a tight smile, and he nodded.

"Yeah, I definitely do. How… How is work going?" He neglected to mention how stupid it was for them to be discussing work in the middle of the street when they shared a flat and should talk about the subject there.

Melissa nodded. "It's fine. Just busy. I never know whether I'm coming or going these days." That had sounded slightly loaded, and Ross glanced away, feeling more like a stranger to her than ever before. He didn't want to get upset, but it was difficult when he was beginning to see how much of sham his marriage had become. Something had changed with her, he was sure, because he didn't remember changing.

"Ok, well I'd better go for my lunch," he said, and was away before she could say any more. It was a relief to seek the refuge of Central Perk, inside which he found Monica and Joey.

"Hey Ross!" Monica smiled upon seeing him. "Joey and I were just working out tonight's songs. Sit down and give us your opinion!"

Ross did as he was told, trying to ignore his heavy heart and think about other things – like the fact that he would be seeing Rachel again later. Just her face in his mind's eye made his gloom lift a little.

By the time the gig came around, Ross had made up his mind to enjoy himself and forget about his problems with Melissa for one night, at least. He, Monica, Chandler and Joey were packed into their van and on their way to the venue, which was a slightly-less dingy club than last week, and Joey was driving. Even though Ross was technically happy about Monica and Chandler dating, he still wasn't entirely at ease with the two of them holding hands in front of him, but he didn't feel he could say anything, so settled for staring out of the window and wondering if Rachel really would turn up.

"It doesn't look too bad," Monica said as they pulled up in the car park of the club and got out, Ross taking a moment to stretch after being cramped in the van. He looked at the building and had to agree, he'd been in worse.

"Yeah, it'll be ok," he said reassuringly to her, and moved towards her for a hug, only to be intercepted by Chandler. For a moment, Ross stood staring at the pair of them in their embrace before Joey said something about taking the instruments inside, and he tore his gaze away. So maybe he was becoming redundant in more than one area.

Why am I even surprised?

Ross picked up his keyboard and started to follow Joey inside, when he heard his name being called from behind him. He spun around and was both amazed and delighted to see Rachel, with Phoebe in tow, hurrying across the street.

"Hey!" Rachel was smiling, a little nervously it seemed. "Oh wow, you're busy getting ready. I'm sorry, it's just we were finished work early and didn't know what time to come down…"

"It's fine," Ross interrupted, smiling back. "You're very welcome to be here. We're setting up right now but you can watch if you want. It's not interesting, I have to warn you."

Joey laughed from where he was standing nearby, not-so-subtly eyeing up Phoebe. "Since when has not being interesting ever bothered you, Ross?"

Ross really didn't know why people had to wreck his attempts at flirting. It wasn't as if he was that bad, or at least he didn't think he was. Melissa had been won over after only six months…

Great. So now we're thinking about your wife and also pissing yourself off at how bad a flirt you are?

Rachel, however, didn't appear to be bothered by Joey's comment. She accompanied Ross into the backstage area of the club, which was fairly small and not very well ventilated. Ross glanced around as he set down the keyboard.

"I wonder if there's a radiator we can turn down," he mused out loud, walking over to the other side of the room and peering behind the couch. "Oh, yeah, there is!" He looked round to see Rachel watching him. "I'll just get this place a little cooler." She nodded and perched on the edge of a high stool while Ross turned the knob on the radiator. "Now, this way is on, so this must be…" And with that, the knob came off in Ross' hand. He froze, unable to believe he had been so stupid. How could he have broken the radiator? Rachel was really going to end up hating him, and he couldn't help but think she ought to. There was no way he deserved someone like her.

And besides, you're married!

Yeah, right, like that counts these days. She hates me.

Ross turned around, bracing himself for explaining to Rachel his inability to turn a radiator off, when Monica and Chandler walked in.

"Woah, it's hot in here," Monica said, her eyes widening. "What is with this room?"

Ross was about to answer when Joey arrived with a giggling Phoebe.

"Can you guys leave the door open? It's boiling here," Monica pointed out to them, and Joey eventually looked up, frowning.

"I'll sort it," he said confidently, walking over to where Ross was standing, clutching the radiator knob and trying to avoid Rachel's eyes. "Dude, what are you doing?"

"Breaking the damn radiator!" Ross hissed, shoving the knob into Joey hands. "I am useless at everything!"

Joey kneeled down, fumbling around at the bottom of the radiator. "Don't say that, you're good at some stuff. Like, uh, telling us how Jurassic Park couldn't happen."

Ross rolled his eyes. "Great. Yeah, that'll really impress someone as incredible as Rachel." It was only once the words had left his mouth that Ross realised he had actually spoken them out loud. "Oh God," he mumbled, as Joey straightened up.

"I turned it off under there, it's sorted," he explained. "And what are you talking about? You're wife's name is Melissa! Jeez, and you say I'm bad." He went back over to Phoebe, and Ross mentally apologised to her for the future she was possibly about to embark upon.

"Ross, can you take this microphone through to the stage?" Monica handed Ross the stand and he nodded. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, smiling. He looked across at Rachel, who was now talking to Chandler and showing him something in a magazine. Her eyes were bright and she kept laughing, emphasising how beautiful she was and making it difficult for Ross to drag his gaze away. He forced himself to, but he felt a huge sense of disappointment settle in his stomach as he carried the mic into the main club and onto the stage. Rachel was just a nice girl he'd met a few times and Monica knew vaguely from high school. She didn't actually mean anything to him and for all he knew, she thought he was goofy and stupid. He wouldn't blame her if she did think that. He was nowhere near the rich good-looking bankers her mother had selected for her perfect daughter, and above all, he was married already. He didn't want to be feeling this way; it wasn't him. He wanted to be making a life with his wife, planning kids, being happy together. He certainly had never intended even thinking about another woman in a romantic context, but things had become so intensely difficult lately that he'd needed a release, even if it was something that couldn't become more.

Just as he was getting ready to make some kind of conversation with Rachel, Ross thought he heard someone call his name.

"Hello? Anyone there?" He stared into the dimness of the club, not fully expecting a reply. He was startled, therefore, when he felt a hand touch him gently on the shoulder, and jumped with fright.

"Hi Ross."

It was Melissa.

A/N: I wish there was a dramatic-music button you could click at these points of the story! Fortunately, there IS a review button, so go ahead!