Chapter 50

Marley POV

I was starting to go a little stir crazy. It had been a few days of staying inside apart from our golf date, the shopping trip and the few trips to the company. I didn't want to go there too regularly though as I knew he really needed to practice without distractions and as much as he said we weren't, Sophia and I being there meant he wasn't always focused on work. When he said he was busy every day, he meant it. He hadn't had a full day off since we'd gotten here and I knew that was just something I needed to accept as part of his life.

Being at Tae's home was great, meeting his family had gone better than I thought it could and some of his friends were coming over in a few days. But, we hadn't really seen anything of Seoul yet and I was starting to wonder if coming had been a good idea. Maybe I would take up his suggestion of a guide again and go out to look at a few things in the next day or two. Surely without Tae near us, we should be able to go most places.

But boredom meant I had watched as much Netflix as I could tolerate and was now drawn to the internet, scrolling when I knew better. Staring at the screen, I saw that things hadn't really died down yet and I tried to look away from the words but they were already etched in my mind.

"Ugly! So Ugly!"

"She's not his type at all, she'll be gone in the next few weeks, back to being a nobody."

"Look at her stomach, fat from breeding that little spawn we've seen Tae with."

"And her shoulders. Almost as big as our WWH Jin. What a joke, as if Tae is actually with someone like her."

My hand went automatically to my tummy, sitting on my imperfections, now enlarged and glaring for the world to see too. I knew I wasn't everything they were saying about me but I couldn't help but look in the mirror and see myself the way they were in those photos.

So now I was curled up in bed, under the covers where I'd been for the last few hours. Tears welled, fell, were wiped away and fell again, my face blotchy and swollen from the crying. I fell into a fitful sleep sometime around 11pm, dozing and waking with achy eyes and heart when I heard the door lock behind him. Squeezing my eyes shut, I pretended to be asleep as he crept into the room, using his phone to light the way.

I could hear rustling as he quietly took his clothes off and the covers moved a little as he carefully climbed under them, sliding slowly towards me. He knew I was a light sleeper and seemed to be trying his best not to wake me. I guessed that meant he was too tired for anything other than sleeping which was good. I wasn't able to think about that tonight, the words stuck in my head reminding me I wasn't good enough for him.

His arm curled over my waist and he lay back, relaxing. Keeping my breathing even, I waited until he was quiet, hoping he'd nod off. "Marley? You're awake?"

I was silent, hoping he'd think I was and go to sleep himself but he persevered. "I can feel you're awake, your heart is beating fast against me. Is everything OK."

I turned to face him, keeping my head down as I tucked it against his body.

"Yup," I answered and he stroked my hair.

"OK, it's not, I can hear it in your voice. What has happened?" He reached over to turn on the bedside light.

"I was stupid," I mumbled into his chest and he didn't reply, waiting for me to continue. "I looked online."

"Oh," he murmured. "I'm sorry. I am thinking you saw things that you didn't want to? What was it this time?" My eyes filled up again and he leaned down to move my face so he could see it. "Ah, please don't cry sweetheart." His kiss was gentle, trying to absolve the world of whatever pain it had caused me.

"It was everything I didn't like about the way I look, reminding me that... that I'm not good enough. It's one thing to think it yourself but to have others say it. It was painful." I sniffed a little, his face becoming blurry in front of me as the tears swam in my eyes.

"I've stopped caring what others think of me. I had to get hard to not care but it took a long time. I'm sorry, so sorry. People are not nice for no good reason. But you nae sarange, you're good, kind, loving and beautiful, intelligent. And you're mine." Each compliment was punctuated by a kiss, peppering all over my face with tiny bursts of love.

I sniffed and tried to breathe, stretching up to settle against his neck instead of talking for a moment and his arms came around, wrapping me tenderly, sweetly close to him. "I love you as you are, I don't want you to change for me or anyone and I wish you could see that. The words of others about you don't matter apart from to make me angry that they hurt you."

Snuggling even closer at his words, his body thrummed under mine as he sung quietly and the vibrations of his voice, settled through me, warming and comforting. Closing my eyes, I listened as he calmed me, the words too quiet to hear. And then he sung just a little louder, making sure I could hear what he was saying, making sure I knew he was singing them for me.

**And you say that you're not worth it
And get hung up on your flaws
But in my eyes you are perfect
As you are
As you are

I will never try to change you, change you
I will always want the same you, same you
Swear on everything I pray to
That I won't break your heart
I'll be there when you get lonely, lonely
Keep the secrets that you told me, told me
And your love is all you owe me
And I won't break your heart

When no one seems to notice
And your days, they seem so hard
My darling, you should know this
My love is everywhere you are

I will never try to change you, change you
I will always want the same you, same you
Swear on everything I pray to
That I won't break your heart
I'll be there when you get lonely, lonely
Keep the secrets that you told me, told me
And your love is all you owe me
And I won't break your heart

I won't break your heart

I was sobbing quietly into his chest as he finished singing, his arms still holding me, his hand reassuring me as he stroked the hair away from my face, sticky from my tears. There was no way I looked anything other than a mess in that moment but he was looking at me like I was his world. "I won't break your heart Marley and I will do my best to protect it from others, I love you."

"Please turn the light off, I don't want you to see me like this."

He complied, with a small smile before it went dark in the room. "In my eyes you are perfect as you are," he sung again softly, kissing the salt off my eyelids.

"Tae, I can almost believe you, the song was beautiful."

"As are you and I wish you would believe it," he continued, kissing down my cheek. "Now please stop reading things on the internet jagiya, I like it a lot more when you're happy."

I sighed, promising myself I'd stop looking at what the internet had to say and listen to what Tae said, with his words and his actions. And right now, his actions were breathing against my neck and his tongue was waking up the rest of me as it traced along my bottom lip. "Tae," I said, sighing his name.

"Marley, I can show you how beautiful you are to me," he whispered against my mouth, his hand grazing down my side, causing my eyes to drift closed, the lightest touch shooting desire through my core, setting my body alight.

"Please," I answered, sounding needy in my own ears but I did need him in those moments, his caress moving from gentle to firm as his tongue invaded my mouth, stealing my breath and my ability to think. As his hands slipped lower to remove our clothing, lips fought to stay connected until we were finally skin against skin, things appearing to move in slow motion even without being able to see. The way his thumb tried to stroke my face while he slid above me, one arm supporting his weight, face inches from mine. My hair falling to cover my eye as I arched under him, his breath stuttering and needing both arms as the heat swept over us, sweat forming to make us slick and slippery. We took our time, pulling back a little when things spiralled us close to the edge, wanting to prolong the connection for as long as possible.

"I can feel every beautiful part of you," he said as he slowed to kiss my stomach.

"I adore you," I answered breathlessly, the quivering building inside my body as he kissed his way up to my chest, settling against my neck.

"I adore you," he replied softly, linking our legs as he rolled us over so I was gazing down at him, eyes partially adjusted to the dark. Sitting back, I rested my hands on his chest as we moved together, tracing a pattern as his hands reached for whatever part of me he could touch, coming to settle on my back as we soared towards the end. Falling forward so our mouth could capture each others sounds, he pulled back briefly.

"Those noises coming from your mouth are sinful," he murmured.

"Says you," I giggled before it changed from a laugh into a gasp as he moved under me again and I threw my head back, our tones mingled, my voice increasing.

"If I remember from last time, we should definitely make sure Sophia doesn't wake now," and his hand came up to capture my mouth, hips thrusting to speed us to release as my gasps disappeared into his grasp. Our eyes locked and held in the almost inky darkness before his head fell back and his own voice was stifled when his mouth fell open in a silent release as the intensity took over, guiding me to my own absolution.

I nibbled at his palm and he let my mouth free as I fell forward, taking his lips in mine again. "Yeah Sophia needed to stay asleep for that," I smirked, rolling to lay next to him. My limbs had settled into a warm exhaustion and I cuddled against Tae, thinking he had definitely showed me how he felt about me, banishing the thoughts from earlier. As he traced a finger down my back and back up again, I relished the simple touch as much as the earlier caresses and intimacy.

"Is it possible to love someone more each time your eyes meet theirs," he asked.

"I've been wondering the same thing," I answered. "And I have come to the definite conclusion I do. I'm more in love with you today than yesterday and I can't imagine how much more I'll feel tomorrow."

"Not only because I just gave you amazing sex," he grinned into my hair.

"Definitely not. But it was amazing, the way your body moves is evil. How did I get this lucky?"

"My body answers yours. We're good together Marley, it wasn't luck, it was meant to be."

"You're right, it wasn't luck," I replied. "Would it be weird to say Matty led me to you?"

"It might be a little strange to talk about your husband when we've just been together but I'm listening."

"I didn't want to go to the park that day but Sophia really needed to get out of the house as we'd had days of rain. The reason I didn't want to go was the day was a special date for me." I reached down and touched the bracelet he'd given me, that date etched on the underside. I hadn't told him earlier as I thought it might make him feel strange. But it all lined up in my head now and I think we were strong enough to talk about this too.

He reached for my hand, squeezing it to indicate to continue and I was grateful for the dark. I opened my mouth to answer and closed it again. Taking a moment before I answered for real. "It was my wedding anniversary." I felt his hand give a small, involuntary movement and I held tight, linking our fingers together, holding him to me. I needed his warmth as I spoke. "I know, it's kind of weird. But I was looking at photos that morning, thinking over the 15 months since Matty had died. They say the first year is hard as you have to go through each birthday and things like Christmas. But the first anniversary was only 3 months after he died and I wasn't really able to think at all back then. On that date, when you and I met, the sun had come out after the rain and I looked out the window watching as a rainbow formed, it's end seemed to hit the park. It felt like I was meant to go there and like Matty was telling me I should go by sending the rainbow. Is that weird?"

Tae was silent and I wondered if he thought it was a lot to process. I heard him breathe in before he spoke into the darkness. "I believe in things happening at the right time and I believe in angels. Maybe Matty was our angel that day, maybe he didn't want you to be alone anymore."

I smiled at the thought of Matty being an angel to my Oppa, blinking furiously as tears formed. "So, you're OK knowing? I kind of wondered when I should say something. But when I look at the bracelet, it only ever makes me smile thinking of you. I don't have any sadness attached to it."

"I'm honoured to share a special day with you. I feel like a new chapter of my life started when we met that day."

"It did, for me too. Thank you for walking into my world and sweeping my feet out from under me."

"I don't know what that means exactly," he laughed. "But I can guess it's english meaning and I am grateful everyday for destiny."

I raised a little higher onto my elbows and kissed his chest, resting my head against his heartbeat. "Thank you Tae, for telling me you love me, for showing me you cherish me, for reminding me this didn't happen by accident."

"You're welcome yeobo," he said, sleepily and my eyes blinked shut as we held each other close, fitting together like the puzzle our lives were while we drifted off to sleep.

KTH POV

Lying with her in my arms, I felt her body fully relax as sleep claimed her and I wasn't far behind. I was shocked when she told me the date we met was her wedding anniversary, wanting to take some time to think about what that all meant so I didn't hurt her with my reaction. But by the time she'd explained her story, I knew it pointed even more to the fact we were meant to meet that day. She was ready and needed me, I had been looking for her without really even knowing I was.

My mother had taken me aside when they visited and wrapped me in a hug. "She's what you need Tae, I see the way you move around each other, so careful to make sure the other is OK. You both truly care. And I need a grandchild."

"Eomma," I laughed. "That's a bit soon to be talking about."

"What are you waiting for? There is love and then there is forever love. I think you know you've found it."

I blinked back a few tears as she took my cheeks in her hands. "I just want my baby to be happy."

Kissing her cheek, stemming my tears before they fell, I nodded. Because what could I say? She had only spent a few hours with Marley and could see what I felt and what she thought Marley felt too.

As I fell asleep, I knew. I couldn't let her go back home without making sure there was a commitment between us. And as her even breaths puffed warm against my chest, all I wanted was for that commitment to be forever.

**The song is Conversations in the Dark by John Legend**