The Best Story…Saiyuki:
Gojyo: Hey Bitches! I'm SOOO bored so I'm writing a story. . . yeah…a story.
Goku: ;-; I'm hungry! I wanna go out and eat!
Gojyo: That's too bad!
Hakkai: Have fun!
P'g: Don't hurt my computer!
Gojyo: go to hell authoress…
Sanzo: Would you all shut up! I'm trying to relax!
Gojyo: Fine…your highness…
Sanzo: (glares at Gojyo)
Chapter one:
Ok, so once upon a time, there was this stupid ass monk who…was just stupid. He ended up in some monastery or whatever because he just did. He grew up to become a know-it-all jackass. Anyway, one day he heard a cry coming from a mountain…and who could blame him. The noise was really loud! If he wanted to kill it (which he did) I would totally support him.
Sanzo: Hey, little Neanderthal kid…shut up.
Little Neanderthal kid: My name is Goku, and I heard you calling me.
Sanzo: What? You must be smoking some real cheep shit.
Goku: . Would you just get me outta here.
Sanzo: Yeah, whatever…
Ok, so Sanzo-sama saved the little Neanderthal and they headed back to the monastery. There the little monkey, known as Goku, lived with the monk. I'm sure the monk was tempted many times to rape that stupid monkey, but didn't because the monkey was so stupid he probably wouldn't even realize he was being raped. Anyway…later on in life this dude named Cho Gono was killing demons. He escaped and ended up kind of dead somewhere. Just when Gono's life was about to leave him the GREAT and WONDERFUL Gojyo showed up! He was like a beam from the heavens!
Gono: Oh wonderful man who is greater than the gods themselves please save me!
Gojyo: Of course I will little man! Because I am just so wonderful!
Gono: Indeed you are!
So Gojyo the Great saved Gono and they lived together for awhile. Anyway Gono realized he had something to do and ran off to do it. The stupid monk and his even stupider companion showed up just as Gono was about to leave.
Sanzo: Pardon me, your greatness, but is Cho Gono there?
Gojyo: So what if he is?
Sanzo: Could I possibly speak with him?
Gojyo: NO!
Sanzo: ;-; Oh, I'm sorry for bothering you…
Gono: Gojyo! Don't spare your wonderful and beautiful life for mine!
Gojyo: wasn't planning on it…
Gono: Thank goodness.
Goku: HEY! IT'S THAT GUY! THE GUY WE'RE LOOKING FOR SANZO!
Sanzo: BAKA SARU! You're right!
Goku: (smiles) What can I say! My nose knows!
Gojyo: You idiot! You saw him with your eyes!
Goku: ;-; I'm sorry, please forgive me.
Gojyo: Eh…ok.
Goku: Hurray! (dances around him throwing flowers everywhere)
Anyway, Gono went off to kill some more demons or…whatever. The great Gojyo wasn't really concerned with that. The monk and monkey however were and followed him (after getting a serious ass kicking from me!). I decided to follow them. Low and behold we found Gono! The maniac was trying to rip his eye out.
Gono: I RIP MY EYE OUT SO THAT GOJYO THE GREAT WILL BE SPARED!
Gojyo: Man, you really are an idiot! I'm so strong that it doesn't matter if some little bird youkai tries to attack me…
Gono: You're right!
Goku: Is you're eye ok, Gono-san? I can't tell because I'm so stupid!
Gojyo: Yes…yes you are.
Ok, so Gojyo the Great decided to do Gono a favour and destroyed the bird-jin youkai guy.
Sanzo: I have to take Gono back with me now.
Gojyo: YOU PISS ME OFF SANZO! (kicks Sanzo in the stomach) (smiles) I feel so much better now. Ok, I will let you take Gono back…but as long as
Sanzo and Goku stole Cho Gono away…but because I, Gojyo, am superior I was able to track them down and found out that Gono could start a new life and change his name.
Gojyo: I hereby say your new name is Hakkai.
Hakkai: Thank you so much Goyjo-sama!
Gojyo: Aw, it was nothing.
Gojyo looked over to the side. Sanzo bowed to him. He walked outside. All the monks bowed to him too. Gojyo the Great wondered where the stupid monkey went so he headed off to the garden. He saw Goku with a puppy. 'How nice.' He though. Just then, the stupid monkey picked the dog up and swallowed him whole.
Gojyo: O.O What the hell!
((End of Chapter One))
Hakkai: Gojyo, you look a little frightened…Daijoubu?
Gojyo: Yeah, I'm ok.
Goku: So! What did you write? Can I read it?
Gojyo: Maybe when you're a bit older.
Goku: O.O…oh…
Sanzo: (grabs the laptop) Give me that. (reads it and gets pissed off) WHAT IS THIS! (shoots Gojyo with his gun) This is bullshit!
Goku: O.O What is it?
Hakkai: (sweatdrop) I don't believe it's anything for us to worry about, Goku
((Next Chapter: Gojyo calls up Martha Stuart.))